Is kylo ren a virgin?

The side novels imply that Leia sent kylo at a young age to Luke to train as a jedi but by the movie he's 29??????? He doesn't look like ever got the time either to anything but be an edgelord

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Of course. He's Elliot Rodger with a lightsaber

It won't get any better for him when...

Well, the rumor is somebody just fucks his shit on up at the end of VIII. So he gets to be like Grandpa Vader at last. A few pieces of meat in plastic armor. Goodbye, penis!

That's really the Jedi's fault

It is the Jedi way to create frustrated lonely manchildren
It's a wonder that there aren't more temple slashings

>Implying Jedi were celibate

Well, he's definitely fucked Darth's helmet - does that count?

Depends on if Hux puts out.

They were supposed to be
Pleasure is a path to the Darkside

George has said that the Jedi weren't celibate. They only had to avoid forming attachments, so one night stands were the Jedi way

>They only had to avoid forming attachments, so one night stands were the Jedi way
>Jedi were Chads
>Sith wanted true love

The first line of the Jedi Code is "There is no emotion"
At least Catholic priests are allowed to feel things

Yeah. Especially little boys.

>tfw Kylo Ren will never update his site or put out a new video
>tfw all Kylo Ren does is shitpost on twitter and bitch during livestreams

Patreon ruined Kylo Ren

Nah. He penetrated his Dad.

If you give yourself a handjob with the Force, does it feel like someone else is doing it?

As a side note, I'm really disappointed that Kylo Ren is kind of a loser.

Like, if someone had turned to the Dark Side, you'd think he'd be like a young SS Komissar. Fearless, fanatical, and utterly zealous while mainlining the Dark Side of the Force.

I mean, it's like they didn't want their main villain to be threatening. He should have been a nightmare come to life.

The First Order is an entire group of losers. I think there is some kind of symbolism since they are remnant of a defeated army and a lot who got their position from birth instead of merit.

Don't forget that Ren is apparently Grand Master of the Knights of Ren, whatever they might be. He's the leader, they're the Dark Souls cosplayers in Mary Sue's vision.

It's not like he's really impressive. (Also, Snoke is a fucking stupid name.)

Demo D is a sith lord?

>who got their position from birth instead of merit
And also by their more favoured and more competent elder siblings dying during the war.

Kylo ren did always give off the "I'm frustrated" vibes and he wasn't even 1 inch scary when he was interrogating Rey too.

Let's not forget the guys just flat out waited and watched her sleep untill she woke up, could have done his job better.

no captain phasma but fuck kylo ren

It's like, the movie would have been a lot more interesting if he was scary as fuck. Like, if he'd just cracked her across the face when she'd gone "You're afraid you'll never be as strong as Darth Vader.", and gone "Do you think the fear you feel is mine?"

The only time he does anything remotely impressive is stabbing Finn into a coma.

We've had a million generic villains like you're describing. Having the primary antagonist of the film be kind of a loser Darth Vader wannabe is one of the few really creative and interesting things TFA did.

He's not impressive in terms of personality, but he's clearly incredibly powerful.

Why do you want to watch the same boring edgy villain we've seen in a million other movies? What you're describing is basically a generic comic book villain.

The problem is that there's no threat. No part of the show felt remotely threatening.

Remember, in the original trilogy, Luke doesn't have a good record against Vader. The first time he sees Vader, Vader kills Ben. Then Vader nearly kills him in a dogfight.

Then in Empire, Vader fucks his shit up. In Jedi, Luke wins by not fighting. Hell, even Vader - though evil - didn't really have his heart in it. He was in constant pain and just perpetually grumpy.

A young, vicious, exceptionally cruel antagonist would be a lot more entertaining and threatening to watch. Instead, Kylo gets his shit pushed in the first time he fights Rey! Sure, I'm going to feel the tension the next time he's on-screen, I can tell you.

they didn't want him to be threatening. he's an extremely shitty sith, they hammer that point in repeatedly.

You never read the Return of the Sith novelization, did you? That one was very well written. Also, when Anakin falls to the Dark Side, he's actively sadistic and vicious - He struggles with a kind of racism (as put forward by Palpatine) early on, and once he's Darth Vader, he stops fighting it.

But why not make him threatening? Even the Star Trek reboot had a threatening villain. When you saw Nero's ship, you went "Oh shit, what the fuck is that thing?"

>Snooke tempted him to the dark side with promises of fornication
>The promise goes unfulfilled and Kylo spends his time complaining about women on Neimoidian holoflick forums
>Meanwhile Chewbacca has a lover in every starport

That's one thing I really didn't like. Rey is both Luke Skywalker AND Han Solo as one. You'd think that Finn would be Han Solo, but he's just irrelevant.

In fact, there's no reason for Finn to be along with them at all. Not to mention that they chickened out of killing Poe Daemoron, and Han Solo apparently destroys Starkiller base by himself.

The movie really fell apart in the last third, didn't it?

Because a powerful villain the protagonist struggles against will always be more interesting than a Team Rocket tier looser.

Captain Phasma is a walking 即堕ち2コマシリーズ

>why not make him threatening?
to try something different. I appreciate the novelty to someone so bad at being evil they struggle to sustain enough rage and hate to utilize the dark side effectively
and if they go that way, it'll make it easier to swallow his redemption arc once Snoke decides he doesn't need the little tantrum throwing brat anymore

They weren't up until no fun faggots like Atris started making rules.

Jedi used to have like half a dozen padawans, too.

The funny thing about the Sith?

Their code basically says:

You're never going to be truly secure; embrace change.
Be passionate about your goals.
Through that passion you will build yourself up.
Through that growth, you will become free.
Embrace the force in your freedom.

It's all about being free and being responsible for yourself!

Immediately falling 2-frame series????

Finn is there to take over as main character when Rey turns to the dark side. he's the loser and she's the prodigy. its like naruto and sasuke, she's gonna run off with the first michael jackson looking fucker who promises to make her even more special

m.youtube.com/watch?v=Vc9KINXCqJc

>It's not that we're not allowed to have these feelings, it's... natural.

But he was noted for being one of the best at combat training of Stormtroopers, just that his defective personality made him not useful for fighting and was assigned janitor job.

I'm still of the theory and the hope that Kylo is redeemed to the Light and Rey falls, and that Episode 9 is Finn and Kylo redeeming Rey and fighting Darth Hologram.

Rey has anger and fear, to be certain. The Dark Side will draw her in.

You would think that since Force affinity is hereditary, the Jedi order would encourage their members to have lots of kids and have more recruits.

But then they'd have to put in a daycare at the temple.

It's the new "brilliant" idea Hollywood and the rest have.
Making a villain as much of a joke as possible to make them seem "deep" at the expense of tension they can provide.

But they did, they even had tiny laser swords

The real full retard thing about the Jedi, right?

They send away people who don't meet their standards to work in social aid and volunteer programs.

Basically,instead of putting in more time to make sure that people who COULD be good Jedi become good Jedi, they're like 'you know teenager, you aren't reaching your potential fast enough, so join the agricorps or medicorps, you fucking nerd. You aren't good enough to be a real Jedi. Go fuck yourself.'

How does being the best stormtrooper make him any less of a loser?

Its like saying he isn't fat because he is the skinniest sumo wrestler.

You realize that stormtroopers are technically elite infantry, right?

Like, the Imperials actually have regular infantry and even civilian conscripts (usually xenos), but stormtroopers are the best.

But since it'd be uninteresting if main characters could get shot they can't hit shit whenever a main character's around.

>elite units who can't even shoot right
So, they're American Special Forces?

They also lost to Ewoks.

Stormtroopers have always been unimpressive in movies.

Empire and first order are full of lifetime, well trained, and decently equipped soldiers who will perform worst than the average rebel in the movies.

I'm not even getting the joke?

The real mistake is that they put the shield generator outside of the fucking shield.

Service corps were purged in the canon reorganization

Budget cuts

Thank God, because that's some literally dumb shit.

Then again, I also don't know how the Republic hasn't ever basically said 'hey Jedi, whatever Jedi you won't use, we will'.

I mean, what can the Jedi do if the Republic takes its rejects?

They can't actually overrule the Republic.

You guys have Finn and Rey backwards, unless they're pulling a bait and switch

Finn's not actually Force Sensitive, though, right?

But the generator was behind the shield.

youtube.com/watch?v=QjkHt3Iw8gk#t=02m07s

Some people are theorizing he is the awakening, as Rey's abilities have been active since she was young

not canon

Nobody needs a lightsaber for self-defense anyway. If we just restricted or banned them outright, such incidents wouldn't happen.

He's getting redeemed and paired with Rey. He'll definitely lose his V-card before the trilogy is over.

I don't know, he's not exactly a GOAT character but I still respect the idea behind their creative decision.

Star Wars is a fucking pop culture force of nature, and since almost all merchandise places emphasis on the Empire's side (thanks to their extremely toyetic Nazi/Roman space aesthetics), there's probably been a lot more kids over the years who've wanted to be a badass villain like Darth Vader, instead of the every-man protagonist like Luke, or even Han. Kylo is basically a way to convey to the audience how they'd ACTUALLY turn out if they wanted to be an edgy authoritarian piece of shit when they grow up, instead of owning their moral responsibilities and keeping their asshurt in check like everyone else does. And with this recent(ish) trend of school shooters and lone terrorists recently, it's honestly a smart move to make a Star Wars villain who actually is a hard look in the mirror for those kinds of people, instead of Badass Sith number-a million. Remember when fucking pic related wanted to emulate Heat Legend? Yeah, nobody wants to be in the market for fantastically well-liked villains anymore after that.

The true fatal flaw with TFA is they didn't make the protagonists likable enough to counterbalance how toyetic the villains still were, so now fans either have to pretend Rey and Finn are interesting, or unironically 'like' the one-dimensional alt right strawmen who at least look cool and entertain by chewing the scenery.

"""good""" is boring

Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!11!!!!!!

I'm sure he regularly takes it up the ass during his dark side training.

You're 10x more likely to get molested by a public school teacher than by a priest, the (((media))) just likes to focus on priests more.

You take that back.

Chewy was a family man.

Good can be interesting, when it's allowed to.

Jagged fel got to bang that Solo pussy lucky bastard

Nah, dudes got an eight pack. I heard he's shredded.

Damn... you're right...

Yes, but the Sith's problem is their reliance on the Force, all the time.

To use the Force, Sith focus emotions.

And you can't really use happy, lighthearted emotion to produce evil lightning or choke your enemies, can you? No, you HAVE to gather evil, hateful emotions.

And then you want to use those cool emotion powers all the time.

So you have to get angry all the time.

Why not use happiness and lust to kill your enemies?
The Jedi don't feel such emotions.

>be sith
>find Jedi
>tell a really good joke
>stab at leisure as he's completely incapacitated by a strong emotion

you've clearly forgotten the scene where ren is shooting at him with her blaster

It must of have sucked to be a youngling, being told you are not allowed to have romantic feelings and then you have Aayla Secura walking around.

Demo plz come back ;_;

That sadly makes sense.

>yandere sith dominating jedis by channeling their passion through the force

I found it hilarious he got his ass kicked by a person who's never used a light saber before.

Well Ray was more skilled with a staff and you clearly saw her staff fighting skills in that lightsaber duel so Ray at least had experience in armed combat.

Only a traitor would want to ban hard fought rights that have been honored since the Old Republic.

Poe Dameron had the potential to be interesting based on his TFA appearances, but then his comic series came along and dashed that hope.

Some of you guys are alright. Don't go to the Jedi Temple tomorrow.

That's Abrams' fault for failing to use any of the many tools he had available to add tension to the story.

that seems fine. what's the worst that could happen?

Jedi robes originally used to be niqabs because the Sith were getting all jacked-up on boner power and slaughtering them in sexy duels.

Admittedly, Kylo had been shot, cut by Finn, and shaken by killing his father.

I'd argue Kylo wasn't beaten by Rey, he was beaten by lacking stamina in the face of utter exhaustion.

Padawans force choking infants when Jedi invariably put them in charge instead of a well trained master.

>White
>Comes from an upper-middle-class family
>Sent to a prestigious school
>Anger problems
>Dresses in all-black
>Rebels and goes on a killing spree
>Falls in with authoritarians with Nazi symbolism

Smells like a virgin to me.

Just cos Ewoks look like fuzzy little cuddly teddy bears doesn't mean that they're soft and weak. They're strong, tough, savage little neolithic carnivorous bastards on a forest moon filled with hostile sapient races, Force-using witches, and large Ewok-eating beasts.

I watched The Force Awakens for the second in Mexico with my family and people were extremely noisy (but I didn't care I had already seen the movie) but people's commentary was fucking hilarious.

And I'll never forget when Kylo Ren took his helmet off and we saw Adam Driver's face, the whole audience fucking screamed and one guy shouted "QUE FEO!!!" it was hilarious.

wew lad stop talking about me!

This. They emphasized that bowcaster Chewie had and how it blew troopers across the room. Kylo was literally punching his own gut wounds to keep himself going while fighting Rey.

Think he was also holding back, even when he had her at an advantage he just offered to teach her shit instead.

Good one user

in the chase scene where finn and ray escape in the falcon for the first time, and right after when they are gushing to each other how incredible what the other had managed to pull off, implying both had been using the force to get things just right

and the establishing scene of Finn where there's this wholesale slaughter going on around him and he looks like he's suffocating despite having been conditioned since birth to lack empathy for 'the enemy' to me seemed like his force sensitivity was causing him to feel each person's death on a much more spiritual level than his conditioning could block out. compare it to obi-wan's 'it's like a million voices cried out at once and then were silenced' in New Hope since TFA relies so heavily on callbacks.

>Lose to Rey
>Lose to Finn
>All around fucking loser

Kek

He beat Finn in a fight

Both light and dark usually view sex as a distraction. Also a weakness. Light see the emotional vunurability. Dark sees it as someone who can get in under your defenses.