Explain to someone who has never seen a Star Wars movie before in his life why The Last Jedi is bad

Explain to someone who has never seen a Star Wars movie before in his life why The Last Jedi is bad.

I keep hearing about how the movie "trolled the fans" or something, What does that mean?

It doesn't fit with the LORE

>Explain to someone who has never seen a Star Wars movie before
do I really have to share a board with people who haven't even seen entry level cinema?
Is this how low Sup Forums has fallen?

It's boring as fuck.

> entry level cinema?

I've seen classic Polanski, Kubrick, Kurosawa, Hitchcock, Welles, Lang, Welles and Lumet films, that's just the top of my head.

Star Wars is "entry level cinema" if you live in a basement in your mid 30s and still play video games.

so you've seen a bunch of meme directors but nothing of actual substance?
shame really

It's entry level movies. The ones that have earned the most money.

But you've never watched children's films? Did your parents not let you watch TV?

I grew up with jurassic park and terminator 2. Not everyone is in their early 40s here gramps

...but I'm 32. I watched the OT when TBS would play it on Thanksgiving.

A huge chunk of the movie was wasted on a sidequest with Finn and a chubby asian girl that accomplished literally nothing.
Same for a convoluted starship battle that ended with a dyke ramming a spaceship at light speed against a fleet, and Poe's mutiny that also ended up accomplishing nothing. You could make the movie half as long with just Kylo's being bullied, Rey and Luke and it wouldn't really change anything.

The movie has no plot and no character arc. It is pointless, boring, horribly paced and edited. No character has any reason to do anything.

Why would you watch TLJ if you've literally never seen a Star Wars movie before

Your whole request is stupid, because, the movie by itself is a horrible convoluted and confusing mess. It cannot be seen without knowing the overall story arc of the previous films. And when you put it in that context, it ALSO ruins its purpose, as the natural character progression is thrown out for no reason other than bash "mansplaining".

have you been actively avoiding them or something? It's honestly pretty hard to go your entire life without watching at least one. I'm not even a fan of star wars but I've seen pretty much all of the films over the years

The movie was entirely pointless aside from Snoke dying and Kylo taking his place. People hoped the characters in VII would get better but only Kylo got any development (by being humiliated by everyone else).

I wouldn't. I'm just curious because I know the director

yeah, it's not like I don't want to watch the movies or anything but I just kept postponing doing a star wars marathon and didn't want to watch just a random film from the series whenever it was on TV

>Take a rookie hero

>build him up and teach him to use powers for good

>watch him grow up and become a great hero and awesome person

>wait years to see his return

>Shit all over said hero and make him die

You know how good stories often set things up, and then give the audience the satisfaction of paying them off later?

Imagine the complete opposite of that, for 2 and a half hours... just literally doing the opposite of what is expected in every single plot thread because you can.

TLJ is "blue balls: the movie"

You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the sad washed-up loser mentor.

Manchildren.

The original trilogy was a very simple story about good and evil with an uninteresting lead. Now this lead is a hobo hermit disillusioned with the world. Star Wars nerds hate it because Luke was their "childhood hero".
It's quite pathetic, really. 30 years old men cry about a shitty fictional character from a series for children.

I didn't think it was bad.. but had bad aspects...
- The character Finn had a sidequest where he went to a casino. He was a main character in the previous film, but all he does in this one is further endanger his friends. If he sat this movie out, the Rebels wouldn't have lost score of personnel and other more important characters would have survived.
- I don't want to be mean to the Asian chick, she was handed a script and did her job... but her character sucked. I can't stress it enough, she SUCKED.
- Several characters mutiny, when in a life and death situation, the commander kept her retreat plan a secret. Her plan wasn't bad. It actually would have worked... if she just explained to a certain character what was going on. He was pleading with her to just give an indication that something was in the works... but she just kept telling him to stfu. Mind you this is immediately after they just watched several other ships get destroyed.

anyway

it shits all over the series for third year in a row. im not gonna watch these crap space capeshits anymore

>could have opened Luke with a memorable line or something really profound
>lol nah let's make him throw the saber over his shoulder, kids love that shit

Star Wars is a gateway cinema of the worst kind. It's a bad series, a clusterfuck of story and characterization that isn't very well done by any aspect, but which attempts to compensate for its weaknesses by adding in excessive shipping faggotry and DARKNESS. The normal user can see this as the shit it is, and may enjoy it, hate it or be indifferent to it, but all the while recognizing that the series itself, regardless of their opinion, is plain bad.

However, these very aspects that try to smear over the shit of its core make it a breeding ground for aspie, unsociable underageb& faggots who engage in every kind of faggotry both online and in the real world. The superpowered characters all trying their hardest to look cool, the force, peculiar, colorful clothes, the whole jedi faggotry and everything about the Star Wars world fuels their escapist fantasies, while the pity-party character backgrounds, emphasis on hope, and overall preachiness of the series make it fit just right with the mary-sueish drives of your average preteen and his sense of unwarranted self-importance towards the world. Exactly the kind of shit that makes little kiddies and underageb& retards eat this shit right the fuck up.

Star Wars is basically THE series to attract the most hated film fanbase known to Sup Forums, which is why, regardless of individual opinions, it is the responsibility of every user to troll the fuck out of this show and everyone who likes it, and ensure that no Star Wars threads ever encourage the newfriends to show their faces here.

To be fair, he was right. Why the fuck did Rey need him for anyway? She already beat and scarred Kylo.