>dying dying dying death death help help barf barf no one can stop the pain please can you stop the pain edition
Just post whatever helps you accept that this is real life.
Let's try something
>Age
>First Star Wars movie
>Favorite Star Wars Movie
>Be judged by others
Other urls found in this thread:
youtu.be
en.wikipedia.org
twitter.com
TLJ review >25
>Episode 4 on VHS
>Space Balls
The worst part is that the movie should have been about Luke's redemption, but purple hair steals the spotlight for 2 hours.
> cleaving Snoke's personal ship in half and destroying much of its escort fleet instantly.
> stopping ground troops for 5 minutes.
You tell me what sounds more cool. Holdo's sacrifice was the climax of the movie.
What did John Boyega mean by this?
Nth for the unstoppable meme factory
Nobody has rebutted this yet
28
The OT special edition VHS boxset
Return of the Jedi
>31
>Return of the Jedi
>Return of the Jedi
>26
>new hope
>new hope
We did retard. You don't need a pilot driving a fully functional spaceship to ram enemy targets. The FTL engines are easy to get and small drones like BB8 are intelligent enough to perform any kind of manoeuvre. Holdo did too much damage with one vessel. She didn't damage only the Supremacy, but instantly destroyed most of their fleet. Your half-baked attempt at saving the franchise didn't work.
It shouldn't have been about Luke's redemption at all. He already had his character arc in the OT. The new trilogy should be about new characters; let Luke rest in peace with wisdom and class as the Jedi Master that the OT set him up as, not as some coward who ran away from his friends.
If you must have Luke struggle with something, don't make it something so stupid. Make it so that he discovers a long-forgotten, fundamental aspect of the force. Something like that.
>Age
25
>First Star Wars movie
A New Hope
>Favorite Star Wars Movie
Empire Strikes Back, but I have sweet spot for the third act of Revenge of the Sith
>25
>Empire because of 'that scene'
>New Hope or Revenge
>32
>ROTJ
>TFA
>no
>27
>ANH. Mom introduced me to the OT when I was 5 years old.
>When I was a kid, RotJ. Today, ESB.
MARY SUE
Hyperspace nav computers would not allow it. It would have to be overridden manually, by a person.
> It shouldn't have been about Luke's redemption at all.
I agree, but they set the the movie up that way, they should have reserved him a proper ending. More screen time, more dialogue.
>We
go back faggot
You don't need a real spaceship to build FTL missiles. The nav computers of the movie are that way because literally no one in the history of SW ever though about FTL attacks.
I still like ROTJ the most, but I came around of ESB as I got older in age, too.
I used to hate it because it ended as a cliff-hanger, but now I realize it was so important in fleshing out the entire trilogy.
what they were thinking
oh my fucking god, what the fuck they were thinking
they didn't made a trilogy
they made ONE movie
and then they gave the story to a complete fuckwit
now it's cursed, it's fucking ruined
not even the prequels fucked up so bad
I don't even want to watch another star wars movie
>24
>A New Hope, on a tiny TV next to a fireplace in a snowed in farm house at that. I'd never seen anything like, never conceived of something like it. I remember it being so fucking alien.
>Empire strikes back, New Hope dies down for me somewhat after they pick up leia
>23
>A New Hope on VHS (pre special edition)
>Empire and A New Hope best one-two combo in cinema history, fight me
>I give TLJ an 8.5/10
Today's my birthday. I turn 26 in 15 minutes.
My dad had his first kid when he was 26. I'm here complaining about a children's film in a 40 year old franchise.
I need to watch Blade Runner 2 again.
lol
>i've never cared about star wars
>like ever other than for le pop culture
>but just lemme cherry pick the EU
>the EU we hate so much
>to defend our shit movie
seriously fucking tired of people who never even knew what star wars was acting like they get to shit on us old time fans and we should just stfu
fuck you literal children and your god awful movies
Not an argument, unlike the posts you are referring to.
On the topic of growing out of things, I had a conversation with my mom about TLJ (she hated it too).
I said that I actually really loved TPM when it came out (I was 9), and she told me that apparently I was super into Jar Jar Binks as a comedy character.
Was I always a pleb or did George Lucas actually succeed at making a movie for kids?
>25
>A New Hope
>Empire Strikes Back
I'm starting to accept that the movie itself ins't completely terrible, just flawed, but it's incredibly difficult to get past how they've treated the OT cast. These were my favorite movies growing up and to today, and they meant a lot to me. Just feels like this movie is telling me Star Wars isn't for me anymore, and I don't think it is. I don't want to support this new era of Star Wars, but at the same time, it's fucking Star Wars, how can I not go see it the first possible showing? The Solo movie is gonna be a fucking mess, I'll still see it. Episode IX will be, at best, a mediocre and uninspired movie, and god damn it I just don't want to go support that next trilogy.
Fuck this all, man. I love Luke, Han, Darth, all of it, but fuck this. Maybe it's about time I actually go read the old EU.
I just want to ignore all this internet negativity, I dont want to get corrupted by Sup Forums's meme opinion
I want to say the movie was okay, that I actually enjoyed it
but then I remember
>the jokes
>the characters
>that swiss cheese plot
>THE FUCKING JOKES HOLY FUCKING SHIT
>the plot holes
>the PORGS
>all that fucking feminism/veganism/anticapitalsm
it's ruined, it's a fucking mess
Force Awakens was a retarded kindergarten remake of ANH.
As for bigger ships, if the Rebels had had some bad boi ships at Yavin, it could have done well, done serious damage. But they werent there. and if they were, wouldnt it be more valuable to keep the equivolent of your AIRCRAFT CARRIERS, DREADNOUGHTS, DESTROYERS, WHATEVER, SAFE? If the Rebel Fleet was at Yavin before the Death Star arrived, their best bet would have been to fucking retreat.
They could just slap a hyperdrive on an asteroid if they were trying to get enough mass. You don't need a whole apparatus of hangar bays and living quarters and shield generators if you're launching from 300 lightyears away and have no threat from defensive fire.
I was 4 when that shit came out. Saw it in theaters. My dad says I hated Jar Jar but loved R2 and Maul.
What were you expecting? Be brutally honest. What were you telling yourself going in?
"S-surely Disney would make good, faithful continuations of this beloved mythic tale from my childhood. Surely the same company that greenlights all the capeshit movies would really turn themselves around this time! After all, Star Wars is cherished and enjoyed by so many people - they couldn't possibly throw that all away!"
i forgot that being an ignorant retard is literally praised by millenials lmao k lemme break it down dumbass, we know ships cost fuck all in star wars, we know they aren't comparable to modern military costs, and if you could make a piece of metal go at ftl you could do it with a piece of rock
fuck off nigger
>25
>A New Hope VHS
>Empire Strikes Back (Top 5 favorite)
Listening to the radio plays for the very first time. About a quarter of the way in. The droids just escaped in the escape pod. Really enjoying it. The serialized structure feels like it works a lot better. Probably because one of Lucas's biggest inspirations was the old timey serials like Buck Rogers and the like.
>25
>A New Hope
>Empire Strikes Back, but I think I'm slowly growing on ROTJ being my favourite
Literally me except it was my uncle, not mom.
I still think the Throne Room scenes are the best in the whole series.
>Maybe it's about time I actually go read the old EU.
Same. Downloading the Thrawn books as we speak.
The only real books I got into in the old EU were the x-wing novels. They were pretty great, I suggest you check them out if you want some real star wars in your life.
TPM is actually one of my favorite Star Wars because it resembles ROTJ's arc so much. When you're a kid, you don't really take notice of all the faults. To me, SW was always a children's movie. When you watch the old ones, there's tons of cringey and cheesey characters. The difference now, and after growing up, you realize that the prequels were just poorly written. Character development is lacking and I don't find myself really caring for anyone in the story even though McGreggor and Portman are great actors.
36
RotJ (not really old enough to comprehend what was going on, though)
New Hope
Someone in the previous thread suggested Finn's role in tlj was diminished to cater to the Chinese market. Not sure if I believe it, but I'm damn sure gonna repeat it to anyone who'll listen.
Don't play dumb user, white people are way overrepresented in the media. That said, I think race isn't really a factor in fantasy/sci-fi as much as some people want it to be.
I was personally way more bothered by the fact that Star Wars is all about girls now. Purple hair bitch was lame, Leah was old and her shit was corny and didn't make sense, and rose was a literal garbage character. Rey is the only decent female character, and even she gets outshined by many other new characters.
Watch Rogue One. The Rebel Alliance was scared stiff of really getting into the shit. They did small scale and highly targetted actions to basically undermine and annoy the Empire, while they hated ones like Saw Gerrera who performed terrorist acts. The Rebels didn't have the balls to carry out an actually devastating attack.They would NEVER do that. Read the canonical novels. It took a complete shitstorm to make Mon Mothma and the others accept the need for an actual rebellion to begin with.
At the time of the Battle of Yavin, the bulk of the Rebel fleet had been shattered at Scarif(Rogue One), they didnt have any ships big enough to fuck up the Death Star. They could have rammed the Death Star with all 30 of their Starfighters, and it wouldnt have mattered. The Raddus(ship in TLJ) was bigger than a Star Destroyer. It takes some massive mass to fuck shit up.
Also tell them that they kept Finn and Poe's stories separate because in 2015 China put censorship laws on gay couples on TV and could put one on films without warning.
> Don't play dumb user, white people are way overrepresented in the media.
Go the Japan and tell people that they have too many Japanese actors.
9
RotJ
Unironically RotS
...
but Japan is almost entirely Japanese people. America still has a majority white population, but only recently has the minority representation in media really started to catch up to the real ratios.
I expected feminism, I expected some sort SJW shit, adobe all I expected a competent movie, a fucking movie that treated the audience with respect, with some fucking intelligence
but no, I've learned my lesson, I'm not paying for anything produced by the mouse, fuck star wars it's dead.
>27
>A New Hope 1997 special edition version
>Empire
>Age
20
>First Star Wars movie
TPM
>Favorite Star Wars movie
ANH
>majority white population
How is it overrepresentation if it's the majority?
I was also 9 and went to see it with a friend and our moms. I thought it was cool and everything, mostly the podracing and Darth Maul, but it's also the first movie I remember walking out of and thinking "wait that didn't make sense."
Why did Anakin's mom say he had, and how did he build a secret podracer if he was a slave, were my two big ones.
My friend liked it too but we both hated Clones a couple years later and it soured me on Star Wars until my cousin let me borrow the Thrawn trilogy a couple years later.
you're ignoring that star wars has had ftl for like 50,000 years faggot
>hurrr thats EU though
yea well you brought it up first :^)
so it took a purple haired stronk womyn to figure out ramming things at lightspeed is a thing? holy shit why the FUCK am i wasting my time on nuwars threads these movies and characters are SHIT
>21
>A New Hope
>A New Hope
Gonna do it goddammit! Was actually hoping for some sort of "Poe has this unrequited love for Fin" thing.
it's disproportionate. I don't claim to know the real numbers, but 20 years ago, america was probably around 80 percent white, with white making up about 95 percent of all important characters. That 15 percent is a bigger discrepancy than it seems.
That said, I'm not trying to white-guilt you user. I think John Boyega has a point but I don't think black people are "invisible" as so many people claim. And perhaps a bigger problem right now and in the future is an over-representation of minorities in media. I'm a white dude and I like white characters because i identify with them, and i think it's important for others to have characters they can personally identify with too.
>cringey and cheesy characters in the OT
Cheesy yes, cringey no, in my opinion. The OT took itself seriously and was so earnest that it helps you take it seriously even at its very silly moments. It's relatable and sucks you in.
That's the problem with things like the quip problem in movies, it seems like characters are pointing out "hey this is a movie remember?" And it just gives a sense of ironic detachment instead of sucking you in to an experience.
>They did small scale and highly targetted actions to basically undermine and annoy the Empire, while they hated ones like Saw Gerrera who performed terrorist acts
So why wasn't Saw the one taking hyperdrives out of every shitty transport and bolting them to as much mass as possible and driving it into shit? If you're telling me that there's actually newtonian physics at play in hyperspace, and a ship travelling however many times the speed of light can transmit that energy into a relatively static surface, then there's no reason they couldn't just commandeer freighters and cruisers and just ram dozens of them into the death star dish until it couldn't operate. It's like the one copypasta about every single car having a miniature hydrogen bomb in the glove box.
The hyperdrive kill isn't even close to my biggest problem with the movie, anyway. The movie lives and dies on how it handles Luke Skywalker, and this movie dropped the ball as hard as possible.
this is an honest rational question my friend: why star wars? cause the way i look at it, they're saying "well we can't come up with our own stories so fuck yours!"
am i just a brainlet? it seems like boyega and his handlers are very openly aggressive to white people in general
en.wikipedia.org
The Mouse is banking on that extra 300 million.
A reminder to all the fans of "Obsolete Wars", just because Papa Rian saw fit to douse the lot of you in liquid shit doesn't mean you have to shit back. If you can't keep your anuses closed we'll all drown in brown.
I don't think it's quite to that level with star wars, but that's how it goes these days with some franchises. Women did it to ghostbusters lmao
i agree. the sincerity of the older films is what gives them their power. they want to tell a story, not just to entertain with cheap jokes and action sequences.
your mom's cool
good, now you faggot prequel haters get what you deserve
fuck your opinion by the way nigger
Tbf the dodging moves were pretty awesome
More than that, even--The original trilogy was a morality tale, with simple themes and relateable protagonists. It's the mythological hero's journey supplanted into a unique and rich setting, and that's why it's timeless. It has a message.
The new movies clearly have no respect for that. The message of the new trilogy is.... girl power, I guess? Rey is a shit role model; she never struggles at anything, and none of the few mistakes she makes have any real consequences.
the goal is to slap white audiences in the face. luke's heroism has to be undone and belittled, because he's a white cultural icon. that rat riz ahmed gets to go around declaring that if there aren't more 'diverse' (nonwhite) actors, more 'young people' (muslims) will 'be driven to' (willingly join) isis. translation - 'let us influence your culture, or we'll kill you.' and so on down the line.
>Age
24
>First Star Wars movie
Phantom Menace
>Favorite Star Wars Movie
Empire Strikes Back
>Age
25
>First Star Wars movie
IV
>Favorite Star Wars Movie
IV
>>New Hope
>>ESB
Yeah, she is. She hates TLJ just as much as me and everyone else on this board. Even hates the fact that Disney keeps shoehorning in "strong female characters."
She was like, "We already HAVE one and her name is LEIA."
The new movies are devoid of any real romantic interest. They traditional roles of princess and bad boy Han could never be accepted by the modern audience. Instead we get corporate romance and Rose falling for Finn without any chemistry.
No lol
The Rey/Kylo and to a lesser extent Luke scenes of TLJ felt perfectly sincere to me. If it had just been founded on a less bullshit interpretation of Luke's character, that entire dynamic would be plenty good enough to build a trilogy around.
I just want to ask Rian why he thought 'failure' was a good central theme for a fucking Star Wars movie.
>They traditional roles of princess and bad boy Han could never be accepted by the modern audience
*by idiotic liberals
In the old movies there was a clear sexual tension between Han and Leia. In the new movies everyone acts like a genderless robot until they need a romance subplot.
>2 decades of male heroes
>add a new chick and she's shoehorned
Your mom's retarded user
goddamn this makes me mad, does anyone else get grossed out around sandniggers? like they all smell gross and are dirty as fuck, i could never get past that let alone their fucking awful personalities
also do women do anything other than post on social media? like seems to me if you were doing something worthwhile with your life you wouldn't spend it being petty on twitter
It's doesn't count. Rey is a genderless cyborg.
The whole Kylo turn to the dark side was retarded.
Why didn't they just do something like:
>luke wants to underside both sides of force
>somewhere in/near jedi temple he has sith artifacts which he studies
>vaders helmet is there too
>kylo sees luke sneaking off to his sith vault
>kylo thinks luke is hiding something from them
>breaks in with friends (knights of ren) and sees all sith artifacts and feels betrayed
>kylo is drawn to vader helmet whilst his friends are drawn to different items
>corruption begins
>eventually luke finds kylo and pals in his vault
>luke gets mad and uses the force on him to get them out (wrecking them all)
>kylo somehow keeps hold of helmet
>luke realises he has to move/destroy sith artifacts and begins to do so
>vader helmet eggs kylo on about betrayal and shit (maybe snoke too)
>kylo destroys temple whilst luke is disposing of sith shit
>luke comes back to see what kylo did and blames himself for not forseeing it (maybe sith artifacts clouded his mind)
wow good argument bud
She was specifically talking about Rose and Holdo, two of the most unnecessary characters in the history of Star Wars.
>Lucas: The hero's journey, good vs evil
>JJ Abrams: Strong independent womin don't need no man.
>Rian: failure, bitterness, incompotencetitty sucking
kill yourself queer
How is it possible for you guys to be this utterly buttdevestated by a Star Wars movie.
Seriously... like how fragile are you?
I just want to know what the fuck Kylo was saying at that academy to literally drive Luke to consider killing him even for a moment. Is a guy not allowed to be a little edgy now and then?
idk how easy is it for you to get pooperpeeved over someone using the wrong pronouns faggot
>Age
32
>First Star Wars movie
I think Empire? Maybe New Hope
>Favorite Star Wars Movie
Return of the Jedi
>How is it possible for you guys to be this utterly buttdevestated by a Star Wars movie.
Luke was my childhood hero. And this movie has him sucking alien tits for nourishment. I don't really mind the rest of the movie.
My personal preference is that shields would be the answer to the problem in question. Star Wars uses lasers generally, not typically metal projectiles like we do (although they do exist).
So let’s imagine an entirely disabled enemy is running away and you’re just doing a constant bombardment for psychological reasons. Shields are going to take power, and I would bet a sizable amount of power. So while you’re continuing a one sided bombardment, it would be cost effective to just turn off the shields. I’m also making the assumption that shields are extremely effective at stopping particles with mass but not necessarily lasers (which would imply why lasers are so often used). This would mean that hyperdrive missiles fail. They were completely focused on the escape ships, so it’d be easy to make this mistake (why would anyone stay on the cruiser?). I don’t imagine shields would power up like an instant on/off switch, hence holdo’s ackbar worked. The only hitch with this idea that I see is that boyega had to find a way past the shields... in which case fuck it they’re sensors not shields.
This is such a load of crap and you know it. If you start making a black Indiana Jones and a black Luke Skywalker and a black Viking or queen of England or whatever all this tells me is that the racists were right: Black people are apparently incapable of creating a story with an original protagonist that is black, apparently due to low IQ or whatever. How hard would it be to create a new story in a new universe that gave birth to a black protagonist that actually made sense? Not that hard, but their whole purpose is to destroy everything related to "whiteness", every white dude watching TLJ has to feel sorry for themselves because they're literally Hitler or hotheads or plain out have some sort of evil inside while minorities and women are all flawless angels. The subversive agenda of this sjw propaganda is disgusting and the fact that the plot is dogshit just makes it more apparent were the attention of the director was focused at: identity politics.
tldr: this kind of shit doesn't heal racism or resentments it just creates those things instead.
>if you're telling me that there's actually newtonian physics at play in hyperspace
They had shit physics before. God, ive seen people complain about how the space battles are basically naval battles. You gotta just go with whatever, and its not hard sci-fi.
But then again, TIE Bombers. But the asteroids the Millenium Falcon hid in seemed to have gravity. Good lord
I laughed in the theater when his dying view was the fucking binary sunset. He hated Tattooine, he never wanted to go back. Rest in fucking pieces, Luke.
That doesn't make any sense.
That response has nothing to do with the question and is simply an attempt to baselessly deflect.
>it's disproportionate.
Kind of like jewish representation in Hollywood? Or jewish representation in Ivy League student bodies? Or jewish representation in the media?
Maybe he was being overly aggressive in training?
I'm sure the nu-EU's explanation will revolve around some kind of shield irregularity on the Supremacy, like how the explanation for the Starkiller Bases' laser was something about hyperspace lensing and tunneling.
If you wanted to make it easier to swallow, you could just have Finn and Rose manage to deactivate the shields as they're escaping. Or have Holdo just bunny-hop closer to the Supremacy to avoid taking defensive fire, like the Picard Maneuver. Just something that doesn't make every nerd who spends a second thinking about FTL travel pause and say "wait, can you do that?"