HELLO DARKNESS MY OLD FRIEND

*inhales*

Other urls found in this thread:

forbes.com/sites/robcain/2017/12/22/last-jedi-daily-grosses-are-swiftly-collapsing-the-worst-holds-of-all-9-star-wars-movies/#3d7c0c0d355c
youtu.be/d8huB62DOZs
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

OOOOO EEEEE

OOOOO EEEEE

wait till you see the- ohhhhhh nonononono

we did it, 'pedes

hello fellow pede

It's actually possible it makes less than this year's Fast and the Furious now lmaooooo

we did it! we tried to pretend it wasn't us but now that it's a failure I think we should show people that this is the true POWAH of the 4chans

>screencap of an article linked in an imessage
wew

This movie killed my interest in Star Wars but I really hope the controversy draws attention to how much of a fucking joke film criticism is these days
Seems like people are starting to wake up

All in a day's work for the 'chan army. This'll teach them not to mess with us by putting minorities and women in their movies!

Own up, which one of you was it?

>ledditard2

A New Hope 2 didn't do that?

OH NO NO NO NO
THE ALT-RIGHT HACKERS CAN'T GET AWAY WITH THIS!

>ricker

Kinda. But it still had a slew of questions that people were excited to know the answer about. Then TLJ came and said "It's nothing."
So any residual value TFA still held is now retroactively dashed as well.

I guess I was optimistic, I figured they could've made a good follow-up
Instead we got a painfully retarded series of plot holes, character regression, awful bumper sticker messaging, bad jokes and Twilight-baiting. Pretty clear I'm not the target audience anymore

Don't go on Leddit but there's no denying that NuWars is the epitome of soy...

SQUAWK HEIL SQUAWK HEIL

THE ALT-RIGHT TERRORISTS ARE RESPONSIBLE

What are those animal things? What role are they playing in the movie?

any of you want to post a link to the fucking article or nah

Who’s gonna see Jumanji this weekend?

forbes.com/sites/robcain/2017/12/22/last-jedi-daily-grosses-are-swiftly-collapsing-the-worst-holds-of-all-9-star-wars-movies/#3d7c0c0d355c

i don't get it

Porgs, which is an acronym for "Puffin or Gerbil", and they live on Luke's island planet. They have no role in the movie, they just tumble around and look varying degrees of adorable and stupid. They colonize the Falcon and eat through the cockpit electronics in several scenes.
They have no impact on the plot or practical use.

Giving Chewie something to do.

Some day, they will understand this and then all media will cater to us - normies will learn to live with the scraps that fall from our table

Fake News

Will easily out gross EP2 and EP3

Will our gross the entire original trilogy

Has already destroyed Blade Runner 2049.

Has already destroyed JUST League

>With the majority of schools out for Christmas TLJ Thursday gross increased 5.3% to $17.8m
>Rogue one saw a 12.1% increase at the same point the previous year with a Thursday of $16.8m

ONLY $1M INFRONT OF A SPIN OFF
LEGIT CHANCE OF 2ND WEEKEND BEING LOWER THAN ROGUE ONE
*INHALES*

I bet it was Putin and that hacker known as Sup Forums

Purifying
Our
Race's
Genes

They are midichlorians.

>In fact, The Last Jedi isn't even holding as well as Justice League did. On its sixth day the DC film retained 27 percent of its opening day audience, nearly double what the Star Wars picture has done.

To look cute

If Jumanji outgrosses it and TLJ fails to meet Rogue Ones 2nd weekend *Inhale* posting is going to be off the charts

What the actual fuck is wrong with Russia? Don't they have anything better to do, I mean they own the White House and they have time for this shit?

Females.

The lightsaber was supposed to turn on in this scene and incinerate a porg but they felt it would be bad for Porgs(TM) the brand
Too bad, would've been the best scene in this shitpile

If this motherfucker fails to make a billion...

>star wars tanking
>jumanji overpreforming

Whos ready for a LITTY new year

Really fake news

JUST League barely grossed 675 Million. TLJ is already past 600 Million in just a week.

This thread has just reached a new level of sadness and desperation

So tell me Sup Forums, how did you accomplish this?

>b-but dee cee

Same, but I'm going back to the pre-Disney expanded universe. There's a lifetime of content there and I don't have to pay Disney a dime for it

Tell us Sup Forums, was getting caught part of your plan?

Delicious salt. Cry more.

>gross ticket sales are all that matter
Do you not understand the concept of expectations? Or that TLJ may have turned a sizable portion of Disney's audience off, damaging the future profitability of the brand.

>he lightsaber was supposed to turn on in this scene and incinerate a porg but they felt it would be bad for Porgs(TM) the brand

You sure it wasn't just the genius of Rian subverting our expectations again with another masterstroke of bait and switch film making??

Jumanji is tanking too kek

Delicious salt. Cry more.

It's making more than all predictions expected desu

>70% 2nd weekend drop incoming
Prepare for 'The BvS of the Star Wars' articles

>the paranoid delusions of your average Sup Forumstard

It's in the official concept art and a deleted scene

This Sunday is Christmas Eve too, which should hurt sales
It's going to have a massive fucking drop second weekend, at which point the stink around this mess will outweigh the initial fellating that numale 'critics' debased themselves with

The first time i saw an article it said $60m opening. Now it's $45 - 55 million through 6 days

Would've been the only Kino scene in all of NuWars desu

>Rian subverting our expectations again
totally this
everyone in that scene was waiting till the saber turn on and melt that furry penguin, but nothing appened, like in the rest of the movie

RUSSIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA FUCK RUSSIA

so they're just penguin hamsters?

>Implying this had anything to do with Sup Forums,

It's because it was just a bad, boring, poorly written movie, with irritating forced diversity on top of all that. People went to see it the first weekend, noticed these facts, and told their friends not to bother. Sup Forums had nothing to do with it.

You have to have an IQ above 75 to post here, child

The real money is in merchandising anyway. Disney needs to make a Porg sex doll. imagine shoving your cock in that mouth and then literally facefucking their insides.

They're an attempt to sell cuddly toys to kids.

Its just trump supporters sitting outside of theatres and telling people not to see it. That's all. EVERYONE loves TLJ and Rey

>Jumanji, starring Dwayne Johnson, Kevin Hart, Jack Black, Karen Gillan and Nick Jonas, is looking to be one of the biggest releases of the holiday season. The film debuts in 3,765 locations tomorrow and Mojo's comps suggest a $64-78 million six-day opening is a possibility, well ahead of Sony's expectation for a $45 million six-day bow

Expected to make $45 million. On track for $60-70 million.

MFW when "MyselfRicebagconvert", the OP of the thread, is me.

r/boxoffice :')

If I'm being completely honest I personally am responsible for about 60,000 of those reviews, all bad

I actually liked the movie I just thought it would be fun desu

stop fucking using trump as a mascot for everything you fucking autist

Exactly. Why be excited for another movie. There's no mystery. There's no more Han, Leia will have to be written out, Luke's dead, Snoke's dead, Kylo's origin is probably lame as fuck, Rey's origin is nothing, and the Resistance has nothing. Anything that happens in the next film is a deus ex machina unless we have a massive time skip. And the Jedi can only "continue" because they made up some dumb old books. Compare to ESB where we know the Rebels escaped Hoth cleanly and were gathered far away from the Empire's reach while gaining allies like the Mon Calamari and their ships.

Who would win? A multimedia conglomerate with over 200k employees with held assets worth a total of over 90 billion, marketing one of the most popular film franchises in the world with literally hundreds of millions of fans vs a bunch of alt-right White supremacists hated by the majority and Russian state sponsored online agents numbering less than couple hundred at most.

And they expect me to believe the ladder has so much power and influence it can compromised one of the most well-known film franchises in the world? How the hell can media even the audacity to claim this was a David and Goliath fight, when Disney plays the role of David?

based forbes

This would have been fantastic with how great the lightsabers look and sound in nu-wars

>Some day, they will understand this and then all media will cater to us - normies will learn to live with the scraps that fall from our table
they shouldnt cater to anyone. if famous musicians teach us one thing than everything goes to shit the second you try to please someone else and not solely focus on making a masterpiece

We are legion.

Don't project. You're the only one insecure enough to make up lies.

weak fucking bait. Looks like youre getting the (You)s though.

Hope you're happy tv. This toxic misogynist is going to eat into the profit of the most progressive film in recent memory.

youtu.be/d8huB62DOZs

>ladder
Intentional or not, this is required

Thank you kind (I assume your gender)

It was too expensive to digitally remove the puffins on Skellig Michael, so they replaced them with these porgs. They ran with it and turned them into Ewoks 2.0.

In retrospect, the porgs were the least offensive part of the 'movie'

Say it with me: SAMOAN NIGGER HYBRID VIGOR

rolls off the tongue. they should just put THE ROCK and Vin Diesel in the next NuWarz to up the ***testosterone*** and make it more mathculinital, dontcha think Sup Forumsbros?

FACT: It's a movie for women and children

(score's fallen by .5 in less than a week btw)

guys who named the porgs?

was it Luke?

why did he call them porgs?

once again, fucking RACCIST WHITE MEN are tanking the score...this is all drumpfts' fault!!!

HOW IS THIS ALLOWED?! PUTIN AND ALT RIGHT DRUMPFTARDS ARE RUINING STAR WARS IT'S LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE THAT THIS MOVIE ISN'T LOVED

Saw it weeks ago in an early screening
It is 100% more respectful to its predecessor than Nu Wars has been. Just let that fucking sink in.

Does it have any particularly nice easter eggs or references to the original?

To CGI out the puffins that live on the island probably.

They talk about Alan Parish as the player that beat the game, he left a treehouse base that they use for a bit.

Fuck, why is the lore for Jumanji so deep? I fucking loved that movie as a kid, still own my original VHS copy too.

Nice. I was hoping they'd get a little tribute to Robin Williams in there somewhere.

>sold my childhood collection of ~60 VHS tapes for $80 on eBay

I liked the cartoon series when it got creepy and they found their way into the inner workings of the game - beneath all the jungle there were caverns of immense, gothic, Victorian-looking machinery moving everything around. Always thought that would make a great visual for a proper film.

This concept art pic reminds me of the later chapters of Made in Abyss.