Let's make predictions for Solo A Star Wars Story

Let's make predictions for Solo A Star Wars Story.

>han solo will start out as a scoundrel with a heart of gold because fuck characters ever being slightly different
>han and chewie will hate each other at first, same with han and lando
>we'll see han get the millennium falcon
>we'll see those golden dice and they'll be the dice he rolled to win the millennium falcon (also they're trick dice)
>there will be a reference to carbonite ("ha you'll never catch me frozen in carbonite not in a million years")
>princess leia will either make an appearance or be referenced, but won't meet han solo
>his mentor will betray him
>boba fett will make an appearance and han solo will do something to piss him off, like spill a drink on him
>greedo will also make an appearance and/or be mentioned

Solo will be taught everything he knows by an ugly black dyke, who's a better smuggler than him in every way.

There will be a love interest

A woman will be the reason he gets the falcon or helps him keep it or makes it runnable, he might have a female mechanic onboard for awhile.

The yellow stripes on his pants tell us everything.

Two words: Kessel Run.

Everything we know about Han, it's gonna happen days or hours before Episode IV.

>its just a film about Solo getting the Falcon and doing some smuggling against the empire and lol explosions xd

It's going to suck dick.

God, I know for sure it's gonna happen, but I really hope it won't

Will we finally find out where Han Solo buys his shoes?

It will be a remake of treasure island, except it ends with Han Solo becoming like the Long John Silver character.

Also, there will be a romance subplot.

who cares, he's a loser dad who get's killed by his own son in the end

and at one point he'll blow up a tie fighter, fly through the explosion, and go WOOOOHOOOO in the trailer

He'll wear the same outfit he always wears, the same kind of stuff we see him wear when he's 80 or whatever in The Force Awakens, making it more pathetic.

They'll make a big deal out of him getting his blaster even though it's just a dumb gun.

>Han Solo encounters a bratty kid
>There's a long scene of the kid being a brat
>Han looks directly at the camera
>"I hope I don't have a son like him. It's gonna be the death of me."

It's already been leaked.
Bettany plays a big mafia type gangster.
Harrelson is Han's tough-loving mentor
Clarke is some royalty iirc
Harrelson dies second act
Lando and Han are initially hostile to each other (competiting smuggler)
They don't fix the Kessel run (a parsec is a distance unit not a time unit)
Chewie is rescued from Imperials

This. Him doing the Kessel Run in 12 parsecs is going to be a major plot point. It'll be the new podracing.

Yeah the same leaks that told us Rey was a Kenobi and that she becomes evil in the end and Leia dies. In other words, bullshit.

Think what you want.

...

Are you ready for fanservice galore? Remember this, remember that?

>FORCE TREE
>THE LIGHT SIDE IS FEMALE
>THE SLOTH IS ANAKIN

This (((((leak))))) is instantly disproven by the fact that Lando made an appearance in Rebels as an entrepreneur running a start-up mining business. Lando is NOT a smuggler.

Now kill yourself.

Th-th-think what you w-w-w-w-w-w-want.

Jenny (the woman who makes out with Han in the Cantina in a cut scene) will be an Easter egg.

For the love of god, go the route of having him be an Imperial deserter who used his knowledge of catching smugglers, to be an even better smuggler

If Disney had any balls they would have Han piloting something other than the Millenium falcon. Fuck I'd even give them points if the Falcon is only obtained at the end.

EVERY GOOD SMUGGLER

NEEDS A GOOD SMUGGLER'S VEST

He'll meet (((Chewbacca))) at a bar mitzvah

What's wrong with that?

There will be a stronk woman "scoundrel" that will play a major part in his story, possibly the one who shows him the ropes

Guaranteed

If they had guts, he wouldn't even start out as a smuggler. He'd start out as some bright-eyed farm boy who, tired of nerf herding, hitches a ride on a freighter to the big city, where he finds out life isn't at all what he thought it'd be like and falls into a life of crime after coming under the wing of a seemingly kind mentor, who eventually betrays him, completing Han's transition from hopeful youth to cynical adult. Maybe Han Solo isn't even his real name (although that doesn't work too well given his kid was Ben Solo).

But this won't happen. "We can't have Han Solo not be Han Solo." It's the same reason he went "back to his old tricks" for The Force Awakens, despite that making him a really sad loser. He'll just always be this cocky scoundrel because fuck character development.

Ha, I'll never be frozen in carbonite, not me, not never

*rolls snake eyes*

>They don't fix the Kessel run (a parsec is a distance unit not a time unit)

EU has had an actually decent explanation for this for fucking years.

Kessel run is through a load of anomalies and shit that require navigation around, thus increasing distance needed to complete the run. Han managed the most direct route yet, which was super dangerous.

>star wars movie
>set in city slums and underground
Would be KIno. But we know Disney doesn't have the creativity to pull something original off.

Someone will tell him the odds.

He’ll dodge a spitball in odds reaching class by quickly moving his head to the side, foreshadowing events with Greedo

He’ll call the Millenium Falcon a piece of junk

*teaching

((((critics)))) will finally have space to actually ppint out the many and glaring faults in Mickey Wars since they wont be called bigots in the process.

Toxic masculinity will feature in headlines and han will be written to succeed in the plot only when prominently displaying some progressive political talking points.

which is stupid since the whole "12 parsecs" thing was just han bullshitting his way into a deal. even tfa fucked that up

You rolled a five and a one

>he thinks (((critics))) will criticize one of the tribe.
Back to Sup Forums with you

>princess leia will either make an appearance or be referenced, but won't meet han solo

>"We going to Alderaan, apparently their princess is a looker
>Han: "Ehh shes not my type"
>*Queue audience smirks*

They will make baby Han meet baby Luke Skywalker

It will be the dumbest thing in the world, you fanboy morons will all pay to go see it, and it will make a billion dollars.

1313 died for this.

I think you're pretty much spot on with everything besides Princess Leia being metioned

D I C E
I
C
E

My prediction is that you'll all watch it and hate it for the fourth time in a row. And you'll pay for the privilege, too, just so you can complain on the week of release rather than months later.

KINO

Someone make a bingo

It will suck.