/trek/

Post-Christmas weight gain edition.

How will he deal with those extra lbs?

Other urls found in this thread:

nypost.com/2013/10/08/us-adults-are-dumber-than-the-average-human/
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

Worf has the biggest BMI increase of the Next Gen cast.

bam margera

Sorry, it's my fault for baking them all those Christmas cookies. At least he grew into the XXL sweater I gave him.

>tfw you are not catholic, so you celebrate internet Christmas on the 25th and then real life Christmas on the 7th

>You meet his gaze as he enters ten-forward, his red uniform barely containing his ever increasing girth. He approaches you and warmth radiates from him like a space heater.
>Ensign user, how are you?
>G-good Commander, um Riker, you stammer.
>Please, call me Will, we're off duty. Say, why don't you come to my quarters at 0700, I'm making my famous Alaskan flapjacks.
>Um, that, um s-sounds great, Will. Um, will there be syrup?
>Commander Riker licks his lips, ever so subtly. You bet your sweet ass there'll be syrup, user.

Some of the outfits on this show are amazing

She fucking nailed the doctor in body and soul. Is this the episode with her best acting

Commander...

I saw Commander Riker at a 10-foward yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”
I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and went back to my raktajino, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to turn in my dishes to Guinan, I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen KFC family meals in his hands.
Guinan was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Commander, you can't take those to your quarters.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the bar.
When she told him to sit at one of the tables to enjoy his meal and he stopped her and told her he would eat at the counter “to prevent any dyson sphere's,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a thing. After he ate each bucket and threw them on the floor, Guinan attempted to tell him he had to dispose of them, but he kept interrupting her by patting his belly really loudly.

i saw the thread was about to archive so i made a stupid post

Quality pasta, practically al dente

Just got Nemesis on DVD for $1, was it worth it?

Look, just because you had to be a loser and can't spam the thread anymore, doesn't mean you have to ruin it for the rest of us.

look i don't know who the fuck you think i am but these generals have left fuck all to talk about

>generals have left fuck all to talk about
Oh no! If only there was someone to spam the thread with shitty memes until the image limit were hit.

go away trekkie 229

Yes, if only for the wedding scene.

Get your eyes checked, it was clearly Wesley.

just let it die

>just let it die
What are you talking about? I'm a new IP, check the catalog. I'm late nite /trek/.

>posting wesley
you are everything wrong with these threads

>you are everything wrong with these threads
I'm not giving you what you want tonight. I'm meeting your vitriol with the iron maiden.

What happened to Armus after Skin of Evil? Did the Dominion try to recruit him?

he let these threads die

Dude, why don't you fucking die (and I'm not even the guy you're responding to)?

Seriously, you're sitting here guarding these god damned threads just responding similarly about everything, I think you need to go jump off a god damned cliff or something you killjoy nigger.

But he's a fictional character

Captain I sense this user is butthurt

I just finished DS9. I'm sad to see Odo leave with apparently no chance of ever coming back. Great show. Also that shit with Dukat putting on Bajoranface and fucking Kai Winn was creepy.

Watching with a quasi-critical eye,I simply cannot take the concept of the Holodeck seriously anymore. At first I started making my Holodeck posts as a joke ("Why don't they call it X instead of a Holodeck? The name is misleading") but I'm starting to get annoyed whenever anyone uses the Holodeck. I just can't stop thinking about all the plot holes, the unbelievable decisions that people make, the fact that it's possible for the technology to work flawlessly while not responding to controls because of some major spatial anomaly, there's so much about the Holodeck that doesn't make even a little bit of sense. And then there's the fucking Doctor. They put a bunch of EMHs in a cave system to mine dilithium or something, but they can't set up holoprojectors around Voyager? Actually, we know that they CAN and DO do this--in that episode with the Hirogen, we see it done, it's the entire plot--and no amount of handwaving can make me believe that there is some reason that makes sense diegetically NOT to have done this before. And the mobile emitter almost never malfunctions; when it does, they can fix it, no problem. It's even more unbelievable than Geordi's ability to operate on Data's positronic brain without actually being a cybernetics genius like Singh was. Why the fuck can't they make more Datas? Why the fuck can't Data experience emotions but Moriarty can? If a Holodeck replicates matter on demand, why can't the replicate and android? Why does that replicated matter lose cohesion when it leaves the Holodeck if it's replicated, rather than projected? Who decided that the Holodeck was a good idea?

>Yes?

>Eugene Wesley Roddenberry
>Wesley is das Wunderkind

Am I to infer that Wes was Gene's insert?

>TELL ME ABOUT YOUR MATING CUSTOMS!!!

>Denied

I WILL

But your pips tell me you're just a lieutenant J.G..
I thought that Vulkanians didn't lie?

>crew of 50 people
>designated coffee bringer

How big of cuck was this guy and what did he do when he wasn't bringing the bridge crew their flavoured caffeine?

>flavour

What is 24th century coffee a bland replicated liquid? What am I not getting with this reply?

Take all the time you need to think about it.

We know you're a limey

Better than a 56% mongrel.

Shut up, Wesley.

>Take all the time you need to think about it.
I just realised there are Americans who OCD on this board and lack the wherewithal to discern flavour and flavor.

>limey
Actually, I'm a leafnadian, a superior breed of human being than most. Apologise and return to your slumber.

>dude, mushroom engines aren't canon

Checkm8 canonites

>there are americans who OCD
>who OCD
You're a nigger?

Post your teeth.

Post your skin color

You're not even adding any substance to this thread by nitpicking regional spelling and obvious typos. I would expect pedantry from someone with the IQ of a parsnip.

nypost.com/2013/10/08/us-adults-are-dumber-than-the-average-human/

>Spock knew about the spores in a 1968 comic because his adopted sister told him before Sybok ran off and you decided to never mention your broken mongrel family to anyone

You just realized this now, almost 30 years after the show premiered.

>can't type a simple sentence
>but calls me dumb
kek

By almost you mean over?

>almost 30 years after the show premiered.
Sorry, Grandpa, I wasn't even born in 1987.

>racist limey

My dude will get at it in the gym. Probably work on his Parrises squares. Maybe some anbo-jyutsu. Round it out with some Mok’bara classes with Lt. Worf. Then it’s off to Risa to lay some pipe, nahmsayin’?

>he thinks racist is an insult

What a charming but uppity negroe you are.

Anyone find it hard watching this episode because of how terrible the teeth prosthetics were on the Gaila actor?

The guy sounded like he was talking with peanut butter on the roof of his mouth the whole time.

Sand Nigger get out

go back to Sup Forums drumpftard

When you get to his quarters in the morning, he still has his blue silk pajamas on. Once more loose fitting, the shirt is now snug over his midsection, outlining the indentation of his belly button and the love handles above his hips. The shirt's low neckline shows off an abundance of soft chest hair.

"Good morning, Ensign!" he says. "You're just in time, I've just finished cooking breakfast." He serves you a plate of pancakes drenched with butter and maple syrup and then sits down to eat his own stack.

There was something enchanting about watching the commander eat. He opened his mouth wide, even sticking his tongue out at times, sizing up each forkful before stuffing it into his mouth. Occasionally a contented moan escaped his sticky, syrup-glazed lips.

I would indulge you but you're simply getting off-topic at this point all over some triggering your regional spelling bug.

What's funny is I wasn't even the original guy you were arguing with. Good luck in Bongistan.

Sure is pol in here
Fuck off stormfaggots

Why is this thread filled with Riker weight gain fanfiction?

first time in /trek/ eh?

>Bongistan.
I just said here that I'm Canadian. What the hell do you want from me? To start spelling flavour without a U to assuage your autism?

A FUCKING LEAF

Don't act like Canada is less cucked than Bongistan.

We have a depressed, suicidal, gender-confused tranny who dedicates much of xher time to the preservation of bloated Will Riker in popular media.

Xhe's winning the culture war.

...

Ah yes, the legendary American banter, ladies and gentlemen. Almost on par with the Outrageous Okona.

It's an acquired flavor. Probably due to being a melting pot.

How long are you going to keep embarrassing yourself?

>It's an acquired flavor.
>acquired

Almost like a certain immunodeficiency virus, no?

Can someone fucking explain the opening of Discovery? I don't get the beacon thing. Here is what I surmise so please tell me if I am wrong..

>Klingons have some sort of beacon at the end of their space
>this beacon is unmanned
>the one Klingon bad guy damages some tech so Starfleet comes to fix
>Klingon hope starfleet fucks with the beacon so he can unite the Klingons against the intruders
>Michael fucks with the beacon

What I don't get is where did the Klingon Michael killed come from?

PLS HELP! I have watched this shit twice and I can't figure it the fuck out.

Ah yes, the legendary Canadian banter, ladies and Gentlemen.

STD isn't canon so don't sweat it

But Bashirfag isn't even in this thread. >She wrote the best Riker fics though.

He was still pulling out wires and poking holes in things.

Comparatively speaking, at least it qualifies as banter. Either stay on-topic or put some salve on your sphincter. This is getting tiresome.

Does the universal translator change it to "left-tenent?"

>tfw he was the son of legendary sportscaster Dick Enberg, who recently died

this newfag doesn't know how to greentext LMAO

on TNG S5E21: The Perfect Mate, they enter the holodeck with a program for an ambassador and a few steps into the holo they take steps DOWNwards. How's that possible? I get they can do stairs and objects because it's a projection that is given a "body" by making a forcefield or shield around it. But they can't really dig into the floor and go lower than the actual floor of the holodeck? That's physically impossible. I get that they can make it "endless" by having a projecting on the walls and having you run in place, (which begs the question how the fuck it works when multiple people are in there and not together as the actual room is not that big) but they can't apply the same to having you step down stairs.

For that matter how does water and rain work? and soft materials? How do they "holo" that?

No one cares.

>berg

Who here watches The Orville?

Guilty!
What do you think was in the episode they cut until next year? Maybe he blew up the ship?

I know that I was just responded to by that ghastly creature. You are xher/it/he/she because that's one of your go-to Riker .gifs. Don't deny it, I'm on to you. We know you're still here, waiting, in the shadows.

>Although Enberg is Finnish on his paternal side, his surname is of Swedish origin.[32] During an ESPN television broadcast from the Wimbledon tennis championships on June 24, 2010, Enberg said his father was born in Finland, and changed his name from the Finnish "Katajavuori" to the Swedish equivalent Enberg on arrival in the U.S. as he felt it would be a simpler name. The surname means "juniper mountain." Enberg said it pleased him that Jarkko Nieminen was doing so well as Finland is close to his heart and it is a small nation with few tennis facilities.

>While working at Saginaw, Michigan radio station WSAM early in his career, Enberg considered changing his name professionally to "Dick Breen" after being told that "Enberg" was too Jewish-sounding.[33] The story of his surname is also detailed in his autobiography, Oh My!

Really activates the almonds.

>berg

rumor is Alara dies. I bet the studio is hoping X-Men doesn't make her much more famous and they can reshoot to where she survives because people positively responded to her character. (and I'm not just talking about the Waifu faggots, they really did a good job of not making her eye candy. She's more compelling than Major Kira, Jadzia Dax or Kes).

Is that, uhhhh, ROM?
Son of MOOOOOOOOOO-GIIIIIIIIEEEEEEE???

Good point desu.

when multiple people are in the holodeck and move away from each other, they actually run in place and projected forcefield lenses placed between them cause them to appear to each other as if they are getting farther away.

Water has been shown leaving the holodeck multiple times, so it would appear to be replicated

Bro don't go down the holodeck rabbit hole. Where does all of Geordi and Barkley's jizz go? How can a ship of 1000 people with single digits holodeck not be booked solid for months? How come borg, who know about holodecks, can't spot Picards little farce in First Contact??

It never ends

It was probably just another self-contained episode. If it was something major, they probably wouldn't be able to just insert it into season 2.

I'm sad that we got one less episode this season, but I'll be glad when next year rolls around and we get one extra season 2 episode.

>Dick Breen
Jesus, the plot just thickened in the universal theory of Star Trek

>rumor is Alara dies
I heard that too. Seth is fucking the GoT chick right? He better not be banging Alara.