Sup Forums, I've sent you the coordinates of Yondu's ship

Sup Forums, I've sent you the coordinates of Yondu's ship.

My only request is that, when you hunt him down, you kill him in the name of TASERFACE!

Other urls found in this thread:

birthmoviesdeath.com/2014/08/07/drax-the-actor-dave-bautista-talks-working-hard-on-his-craft-for-guardians
twitter.com/AnonBabble

excuse me?

>TASERFACE

I want the soverign to throw me to the ground call me a lower life form, stomp on my face then rip off my pants and start jerking me off acting really huffy the whole time, stopping every once in a while to tell me I am not worth of her superior body and stomp the base of my dick before letting me finish inside her.

>TASERFACE

>TAZERFACE

It's crazy how this got Yondu killed in the end

...

He's a real character.

...

SCROTUMHEAD

I'd be more surprised if he WASN'T a real character
still a stupid fucking name

...

TASERFACE

went into this movie blind, am i missing something about this film that makes it as good as everyone says? it was a chore to get through, every character was obnoxious, all the action scenes were shit and had no sense of danger, everyone was goddamn invincible, baby groot might be the worst thing ive seen, there were like 100 jokes and only 5 could be laughed at but i spent so much time cringing at the failed jokes it killed any good ones for me.

What you are missing is that you didn't like the film because it was not the type of film you enjoy.

So maybe don't go see the next one?

i loved the first one so i had all the reason to believe i would like the second. after i watched it, i went to read reviews to see if anyone else had the same issues but it got such praise its hard to believe, i just want to know what experience they had because it was not the same at all

I appreciated the joke more when I found out it was an actual villain's name.

If you liked the first one and you didn't like the second one, I don't know what to tell you. Have you considered that you might be defective?

you're going to have to explain better, the first movie felt like things mattered and characters could fail/take damage with drax being beat and star lord being tied up a nice few times or at least captured, groot wasnt forced in our face as the main focus for what was like a 10 min opening, rocket was an asshole in the first but in the second he was just obnoxious with shallow character development, yondus personality pulled a 180, chris pratt was chriss pratt, gamora was boring as fuck, any part with ayesha was boring as fuck and felt like cannon fodder, back to the damage thing, drax gets pulled along a crashing ship hitting trees and the ground and stands up to make a joke, they all fall crazy amounts of distance and hero pose like gravity aint a thing, nebula gets swiss cheesed by gamora and gets her arm crushed which she quickly repairs, nothing mattered

I really thought Rocket was gonna tase him in the face before the end.

Eh it definitely wasn't the same.

All of that was the same in the first film, you're remembering it wrong.

They only difference from your post was that Drax got fucked up by Ronan in the first film, but him being able to get slapped around by some trees was not an inconsistency, Ronan was supposed to be a badass who could handle an infinity stone with his bare hands so Drax getting his ass kicked by him, but surviving getting dragged by the ship no problem is not inconsistent.

so peter and gamora wrestling each other in the first was equal to her lifting a massive gun and also dropping what felt like an empire state amount of distance and still being ok? man you're not remembering ti right, the first one had a lot higher stakes and people could be damaged.

It's like you forgot the five of them shared the power of a fucking infinity stone and lived to continue fucking things up collecting high stakes bounties since the last movie. But no, they totally wouldn't be massively stronger for surviving one of the singularities that created the entire universe. Or anything.

They mention constantly that she's been modified to give her enhanced abilities, she survives being thrown out in space for a few minutes because of it. Her and Nebula both, which is also why Nebula can keep popping all her shit back in place and be fine (something else you bitched about, but that she also did in the first film). If anything, her and Star Lord wrestling in the first film is a fault of that one, not the second because it actually doesn't make any sense for him to be able to take her physically, unless she was just holding back.

And other than the bit where Ronan almost killed Drax, there was no other part of the first film with "higher stakes" for anyone other than random Nova Corps. guys who got 'sploded.

Remember that part when all of them fell out of a ship in the upper atmosphere and fell to the ground, and they all survived because they were wrapped up in tree branches? And then they got up to fight again like 30 seconds later.

You're really serious! OH GOD MY SIDES!

you're assuming that, only thing the movie touched on was star lord holding it because he was half plot device and you could make the argument it was mostly his doing

It was a huge plot point that they could only manage what they did because they shared the power between them. They mentioned that Peter survived it alone for a little bit because of his heritage, but it was clear that it was still going to kill him until everyone else grabbed onto him.

You're literally just searching for inconsistencies that aren't there.

and you're just making up story that isnt there, inconstantcies aside, how do you deal with the 100 odd quips that fell flat, the jokes that derailed emotional moments, forced baby groot, every character beign flanderized besides chris pratt being chirs pratt and then everyone else being as boring as watching grass grow

Shame he didn't retort about how it's dumb for a raccoon to call itself "Rocket"

By disagreeing, just like all the other people who you claim are wrong because it's much more likely that you're the only person around who isn't just being willfully ignorant.

How do you deal with the fact that you essentially wasted money watching a movie you were never going to like?

I hope you learn your lesson and never watch another MCU film ever again.

Not that Disney would notice.

im not claiming anyone is wrong, im just trying to talk about it, and millions of people watched honey boo boo and have scat fetishes, im not saying that those people are wrong im just saying they are both consuming shit or at least see something about it appealing that i dont

i didnt buy anything, i had a gift card that was going to expire and i had an evening to kill

>how do you deal with the 100 odd quips that fell flat
I liked plenty of the jokes
> the jokes that derailed emotional moments
Honestly this was a problem
> forced baby groot
Didn't care, the three scenes he had were all good
> everyone else being as boring
Yondu, Mantis, and Ego weren't boring

Given the choice I'd watch 2 again before 1, enjoyed everything about it more. It didn't have a cardboard villain and a glowing maguffin ending and the Pacman bit, while lame, didn't go on for nearly as long as the dance off

ok ego was good and i liked his parts but the rest were boring, mantis was a generic character and you could tell why she was there and what she was going to do well before the movie even came out, yondu didnt even feel like the same character in the first one and his "Action" scene was just a giant wank to itself and felt more like a shitty music video, and i really cant see how anyone liked forced as fuck baby groot, every scene he was in was so obnoxious and went on for way too long, like you can get a chuckle for the first 2-3 times he makes a mistake or dances for a bit but the intro was way too long with him as the focus during a fight, the cell scene was funny the first 2 attempts but got so over done it was annoying and the end scene with the buttons was also annoying and dragged out even longer with star lord yelling out to everyone for tape

You are though

>Why does everyone like this movie? It was bad because these reasons
Well, I don't agree with that and obviously neither do all the other people who enjoyed the film
>Yeah but look at all this crap I'm pointing out about why you shouldn't like it
But again, I disagree and also a lot of that shit is just factually incorrect
>SHIT TASTE SHIT TASTE

What a fuckin DORK

im not saying you shouldn't like it, just explain to me whats to like about the specifics i mentioned that isnt a shallow answer like "i liked it cuz i liked it" people start pointing out issues less glaring than these on other things with less resistance

A couple gags ran long, but they were tiny parts of the movie and far from ruining it altogether.

Yondu WAS in fact very different in the film, that was kind of his whole character arc. He took a look at himself compared to the person he used to be and decided he didn't like what he saw. Your complaint about Yondu's action scene is entirely subjective and I think you might just not like action movies?

Least it's a pretty memorable name. That's easy to mess up in sci-fi. For example, I can't remember the names of anyone from Rogue One besides Ursa and Krennick.

You didn't mention specifics, you said shit like "a bunch of jokes fell flat" which I and others disagreed with. The only specific stuff you pointed out were "inconsistencies" that multiple people have pointed out don't actually exist outside of your head.

You're coming into a thread about a film which will naturally be full of people who liked the film, asking why more people don't dislike it like you do, and then acting surprised when we tell you we think your taste is bad.

I remember K2S0, which is hilarious because it SHOULD be the most forgettable one in the film by all account.

>yondu didnt even feel like the same character in the first one
A mercenary/pirate that puts on a hard front, but deep down cares a lot for Peter? Seemed pretty consistent

The arrow scene in the ship was the best looking sequence in the MCU. The bodies falling around him and Rocket and especially the top down shot at the end.

Baby Groot dancing for the opening credits was a better focus than the fight, if I wanted tho see a bunch of actors flail against a giant cgi alien while I have no interest I'd watch the Avengers.

i do like action movies, but scenes where the hero is literally untouchable for a significant fight is boring, look at any martial arts film or 80's action and in most you will see a struggle of some sort, not just the hero taking 0 damage and killing off a large portion of the conflict outside the main villain

underrated post

judge my "taste" all you want, i can point out many plot holes and bullshit points of the film, even if like above mentioned you want to believe gamora went easy on peter, in the first she gets easily subdued by 2 prison goons but in the second is superman, nebula in the first pounds the piss out of gamoras ship but cant free her arm from a metal beam from the ship crash in the first scene? you should really sit down and rewatch the first and second back to back

At least 50% of this movie was Bautista laughing, and I don't even mind that.

> That scene where he's talking about his daughter and just gets quiet and stares across the field
> Mantis touches him and immediately starts crying

Like I said, most of the actual legitimate inconsistencies are in the first film, not the second. Even then, there really aren't many. I won't pretend there are none, because that's asinine every film has at least some minor flaws in the plot. But you're saying that the second film was riddled with plot holes and I'm just not seeing it.

That actually got me a little. I wasn't expecting it. Poor fucker has to live with that his entire life.

Just left the theater


F ;_;7

WHY IS FUCKING BATISTA A GOOD ACTOR? I STILL CAN'T FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT, IT'S KILLING ME.

>>Hey, you want some batteries?!
>>HA HA HA HA HA!
For some reason, I laughed hard at that.

It was Cooper and Bautista's delivery of those lines. You can't quote this gag or describe it, you have to see it for yourself.

You know, I tried the whole Taser-face thing one thing. Installed a taser directly in my nose after getting kicked in the face a bunch of times by Perry the Platypus. Sounds brilliant, right? He kicks me and gets shocked?

Well, after I put it in, I took a shower and it... yeah, it didn't work out so well.

Mary Poppins, y'all.

At least he got to help kill Ronan in the first movie, it's probably why he's so jovial in 2. He avenged his family all he has left is to dick around in space with his friends

Pro wrestling is literally like, 50% acting. It makes sense that he'd be at least passable at acting after wrestling for so long.

how is the heroes becoming invincible not an issue to you? if no one fails or has the possibility to fail wheres the tension? if you want more isolated in vol 2 then ok, why was ego so weak? he controlled the whole planet but only made minimum effort to kill the group, heres another, nebulas character goes on a cazy rant about killing thanos throughout the entire second movie while being his bitch in the first, or how about ego pointlessly telling star lord about the tumor when he didnt have to or even how yondus whistle works, in vol 2 it shows the arrow being used at crazy distances, out of whistle shot, he doesnt even see it but all of those restrictions apply to the other dude who tried to use it and also in the first movie

Best character moment in the movie

He had a great character arc.

...

>if no one fails or has the possibility to fail wheres the tension?

Because 2 was character focused not plot focused.

I had 100% more investment in Peter and Ego talking than I did with anything involving Thanos, Ronan, or an infinity gem.

Yondu didn't need to fight his crew, he needed to wipe them out to start that process of correcting his mistakes.

Even as hokey as " I just wanted as sister!" was, still better than Gamora and Nebula's fight from the first movie.

This was my main takeaway after I walked out of the theater. I realized I was thinking "Oh man I can't wait for the next Drax scene, that guy is fucking great" and then I realized I was watching a movie so I could see fucking Batista act. What a strange world.

>how yondus whistle works
The arrow is clearly controlled by his fin, which Kraglin is seen using at the end of the movie. He also used it in a large open area in the first movie.

Ego was weak because he had focused himself into an avatar for most of the movie. Did you not notice how Ego actually curbstomped the entire team at the same time once he put on his serious face? If Peter hadn't stepped in they would have all died.

Nebula hated Thanos, she sides with Ronin in exchange for helping him kill Thanos in the first movie.

The Tumor thing slipped out, he was caught up in the moment, his final triumph and he thought Peter would understand what he was saying because they both had glimpsed Eternity.

Yondu's whistle somehow interacts with his fin which is the thing that actually controls the arrow. Did you not notice how it glows when Yandu whistles and how he needed a new fin to control his arrow?

Also the other guy trying to use it was a novice that never had tried it before, and in the first movie we never saw Yandu's maximum range, but he DID cover an entire battlefield in a few seconds with it.

>how come other people like thing I don't like??

Go check for autism, down syndrome or whatever. You're the problem my lad.

>why was ego so weak? he controlled the whole planet but only made minimum effort to kill the group
Well first off, at that point he was somewhat fighting Peter for control since they could both do it. Yes he was definitely still dominant, but he had Peter raging and attacking him using the planet as a weapon which shows he absolutely did not have complete control. He didn't make minimum effort to kill them, they were just able to avoid dying because they're the heroes and thus fairly competent, and Ego was also being held back by Peter fighting him, and Mantis attempting to keep him dormant.

>nebulas character goes on a cazy rant about killing thanos throughout the entire second movie while being his bitch in the first
You're literally just forgetting the fact that Nebula hopped on Ronan's team immediately the second he said he'd kill Thanos, wanting to kill Thanos has been her motivation the entire time, she quite literally says so in the first film.

>how about ego pointlessly telling star lord about the tumor when he didnt have to
This is a moment of plot trumping everything else, but it's certainly not out of character for Ego. HIS NAME IS EGO, he is completely incapable of understanding that other people might not think he is right, because in his mind he is perfect. He doesn't think anything of revealing that detail to Peter because to him, his logic for doing it made sense.

>how yondus whistle works, in vol 2 it shows the arrow being used at crazy distances, out of whistle shot
He got an upgrade to a more powerful controller, so obviously it's going to be better than the one he had before. How is this hard to understand?

I also think that Ego wasn't fighting to kill, even if he couldn't bring Peter to his side he needed to use him as a battery He said earlier in the movie that he alone didn't have enough power to fulfill his plan.

Also it seemed clear that Ego couldn't divide his consciousness, since if his avatar stayed away from his core too long he would die.

You ever read a post and wonder how a person manages to feed themselves without drowning?

>out of whistle shot

it was obvious that the headpiece was what picked up the whistle

I wonder if this is how DCfags feel....

>it was obvious
Type slower guy, my dude is brain damaged or something.

While you cucks are upboating your epic baby groot maymays to reddit never forget who died for your quips

rip in pepperonis space cowboy

why does he wear a Steam logo shirt?

Because much like Half-Life 3, he's dead.

he's a big guy yon du

top kek
have a rare drax

what got him killed is rocket and drax not doing return trips

>Those last minutes if the movie
Did Gunn wanted to taste our feels?

A lot of work and private lessons.

birthmoviesdeath.com/2014/08/07/drax-the-actor-dave-bautista-talks-working-hard-on-his-craft-for-guardians

BATISTA > The rock on the big screen anyday

>He avenged his family all he has left is to dick around in space with his friends
Supposedly Thanos is still the big target

Taser-face-nator?

I've blocked out most of the stuff with Thanos since that's all getting solved in the Avengers two part movie and I have zero interest in that

Stop. Even if you don't like Johnson, there's no need to make a straight faced lie like that

That scene works so well precisely because Drax is so boisterous for so much of the movie.

It also adds weight to when he says "we're not friends...we're family".

Drax fucking means it.

...

> tfw no space Butterfield.

It's not the range of an actor that determines how good he is, it's how well his range matches his character.

This, Batista is not a good general actor by his own admission, but he gets a role and tries really really fucking hard to be good at that one specific role, so it works out. Even if most of his roles are "big dumb guy who fights and says a funny thing sometimes" he wants to be really fucking good at being that big dumb funny guy, so he becomes memorable.

Rocket was obnoxious because he's been hurt by practically everyone his entire life and his defense mechanism is to be the meanest thing in the room. He doesn't know how to be close to people and he's meaner in -2 because he's unconsciously trying to push people away since everyone he's ever been close to has hurt him. They explain this in the movie, you know.

...

I want a spin-off with just Rocket, Groot and Drax

IIRC Gunn said he was never going to have him in movies because his name was dumb and then he suddenly felt like having him in GotG vol 2.

Redpill me on the old crew
I know they're the classic GotG but who's who

Bump

What do her antennae feel like?

Wow. And here I thought Condiment King had it bad...

Well there's Rocky Balboa