"Battering Ram Cannon"

This is one of the most autistic descriptions for a superweapon I've ever heard.
Do they mean it's a cannon or a battering ram?
If it's a cannon, why does it need to be a battering ram when it can fire from a distance?
If it's a battering ram, then why is it also a cannon?
The term "Battering Ram Cannon" implies that it's a cannon that fires battering rams, which isn't the case.
The writing in this movie seriously sucks ass.

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youtube.com/watch?v=cbKMEDIEcBQ
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And for no reason, it's main method of being transported is by driving it to a location.

Did disney forget that repulsorlift technology exists?

Star Wars is shit

The answer to this is
GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND GROND

the audience IQ sweet-spot they were aiming for was 80

Welcome to Soy Wars naming conventions, OP.
Do you remember the edgy Batman AT-AT's?
Do you know what they're called? AT-M6
Do you want to know what M6 stands for?
MEGACALIBER SIX, because now it has a battleship laser cannon on its back.

>punches a tiny hole through the door and nothing else
lol

>Mobile artillerypiece type weapon built for destroying bunkers.
>"Hey guys, let's tow it over CLOSER to the enemy so they can target it more easily!"

Were the First Order retarded?
Why did the superlaser cannon not have it's own propulsion system? Why does the first order not have it's own bombers in that massive fleet of ships?

When I was a kid and autistic, I really liked all of these production notes and art/tech books for star wars. This is really sad, I hope pedowood never gets the rights to 40k.

Where does it say battering ram in the pic?

Why didn't they just hyperspace ram the planet?

the reason was SALT

????

They say it in the movie you fucking moron

inb4 "hurrr i didnt watch it/durrrr i didnt pay attention fuck u blah lbah"

>Why doesn't this thing BBQ everyone in the bunker, haven't these 'tards heard of the first law of thermodynamics REEEEEEEE

Why didn’t Kylo Ren just use the force the flip the switch the control the gate?

Why don't they just call one of those 20 star destroyers in orbit to lower itself and knock the bitch down with its main batteries?
Are they too weak for the job?
Why don't you mount the fucking GROND on the fucking ships then?
Why can't they hire one fucking person whose only job will be to pick up these inconsistencies and try to iron them out with the production team so that it has some fucking semblance of internal order without sacrificing the flashy sequences?
WHY?

>not just hyperspace ramming a small ship into the ground

Also
>the cannon requires time to charge up between blasts, however, during which time it is vulnerable, necessitating escort walkers and support

Awful writing, also why is it magically vulnerable between shots? What the fuck?

Poe's exact reaction to it was mine as well

>why is it magically vulnerable between shots
So you can shoot at it during the videogame adaptation - available now from Disney Lucas Arts studios

Kyber n' shit loL

A bald assertion isn't an argument. I've already refuted your representation based arguments. Give me something else.

Remember to buy the toy only thirty installments of 29.99.

Why not just fire star distroyer cannons from orbit? They had ion cannons on some of the star destroyers, even regular cannons would break through some rock.

they also say "bigass ship"
"battering ram" is a descriptor that gets across what the thing does, not an official name.

Poe saved the resistance at the beginning of the film, right ?

It's setup as if his actions were stupid and that it costed lives but if he didn't destroy the dreadnaught it would have destroyed the Rebels' ships during the chase OR the dreadnaught would have destroy the fucking rebel base from Orbit, just like it did at the beginning of the film.

So Poe was right from the beginning.

Should have been that the FO deployed a new TIE bomber, the rebels desperately try to knock it down while AT-AA's (ATATs with anti-fighter guns) pick off fighters. This would make Poe's earlier fuckup getting the bombers and fighters killed more important to the story because the bombers could have destroyed the AT-AA's and the extra fighters would have made it easier to destroy the FO bomber.

>bigass
They said "bigass"
...in Star Wars.

That's so interesting!

Why didn't they just use orbital bombardment like they did at the beginning of the movie? Those weapons literally nuked the fuck outta the site the Resistance escaped from, so why didn't they do the same on Crait? The FO is more retarded than the Empire.

bubonic bump

yeah, I guess it's time to fucking ditch this thing
it's not coming back
you are not getting smooth eloquent gentlemen like Vader and Dooku in these, not in a million fucking years.
they ae going to fucking Michael Bay splosion fests with shitty forced humor, stronk wamen who are always right even when they are not and idiotic men who ruin everything
done
I'm done

That's the meta-point of the movie. They can't show it now but they leave enough hints for you to pick up. You applaud the violet haired lady if you're one of those 80 iq neo socialists, but understand the struggle and the sacrifice Poe must live in if you're one of the True Humans.

There's also the "Godspeed Rebels" thing which happened twice.

>it's not even a bomb

deathstar tech

No, the term battering ram refers to the period in which the thing recharges, like with how a battering ram has to swing back to gain momentum. I dont even like SJW wars and even I could understand that you retard

>deathstar laser
>doesn't kill everything inside the bunker
This still isn't as bad as rian being given the greenlight to bring back the vong.

In a universe where the Force is a prominent phenomenon to the point where "May the Force be with you" is a common saying, the Christian term "Godspeed" exists, implying that Christianity exists in a galaxy far, far away...
I'm fucking done with Star Wars.

Battering rams don't recharge.
Just call it a rechargeable laser cannon.

...

>rian being given the greenlight to bring back the vong.
I EXPECT NOTHING AND I AM STILL LET DOWN, WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING, WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS TO ONE OF MOST POPULAR FRANCHISES IN THE FUCKING WORLD, WHY ARE THEY KILLING IT??????

le bump

To be fair, Han says hell in Empire, I don't think it's that far fetched for there to be at least one religion in the SW universe with a singular god and a Hell.

>Disney can't into brutalism

The irony.

so why didnt they just shoot this from space

Looks like a giant lightsaber.

jesus christ, that thing would have so much torque it would twist itself into peices, TANK TREADS FUCKING WOULD WORK THO, BUT THANKS ANYWAYS DISNEY, JUST MAKE EVERYTHING LOOK LIKE AN AT-AT

This is what happens when hollywood hires friends and family instead of the smartest person available. You get shit on a stick. If I were the government Disney would be auctioned off and everybody goes to prison.

>when I was a kid and autistic
>40k
Sounds like you’re still a kid and autistic.

Should have been pulled by AT-STs like a sleigh. At least then I would have had a laugh.
youtube.com/watch?v=cbKMEDIEcBQ

Speaking of dumb writing during this part
>they got our signal, but nobody's coming
Uh, why the fuck not? The First Order fleet but just decimated and are down to half a ship, they just experienced a crisis of leadership and their remaining leaders are sitting right there on the planet facing a very convenient anvil of a fort, what possible reason would the resistance's allies have to NOT come take advantage of this highly opportune chance to knock out the First Order in one battle?

>hurr why didn't they durr
Watch the film first before sperging out.

>what possible reason would the resistance's allies have to NOT come take advantage of this highly opportune chance to knock out the First Order in one battle?
youtu.be/fgRFQJCHcPw?t=40s

It's been well established that the New Republic are both complete pussies and complete idiots. They're like a galaxy sized EU, I'm surprised they lasted long enough to get their shit stomped by the FO.

You dont like weird DnD goblins with snake whips? What are you some kind of manbaby misogynist?

That's because it is.

Uncle Owen also says "there'll be hell to pay" in A New Hope. Han talks about hokey religions, plural, but the only one that the Rebellion/Resistance has any confirmation of is the Force, so why wouldn't they say "may the Force be with you" like they did in RotJ?

That is a weapon that would have formerly been a main threat in some of those cheap SW knock off movies.

Roger BUMPass

Do you say "hang up" when you refer to ending calls on your cell phone?

Its symbolic you moron

This. I was never really interested in Star Wars but knowing they also don't have an answer to FTL bombardment means they're all just shit written until they address it again.

Why didn't they just level the site from space? The rebels have no ships, no way to escape. Why was the plan to go in and clear the site with ground troops? Why not just have the ground troops cordon the area and nuke the site from orbit?

The entire movie was like this: Holdo's grand plan to escape the first order armada was to have smaller ships leave the big one, in full view of the larger ships.

Wouldn't it be cool if there were some giant alies that hatches in the planet core and then it would break free like from an eggshell and pick up the laser while Rey and the gang had to fight it using the millenium falcon? Then Rey would open the cockpit door and climb the giant alien like shadow of the colossus, using the force and all, getting to vulnerable part inside of it's ear and stabbing the alien to death with her tiny lightsaber. Then it starts boiling like tetsuo in akira, Rey jumps out of the ear like a basejumper barely dodging the giant lightsaber in freefall, until the millenium falcon falls up to her speed, with grasping for the hand of Finn who is going like REEEEY, GRAB MY HAND, and shortly before they hit the ground Rey gets a hold and the falcon pulls up and the giant alien explodes.

>Why didn't they just bombard it?
Because Hux is stricken with Villain Retardation Syndrome, see the plot had to make him dumberer so the good guys could win.

The empire must have to go through a lot of giant oversized doors to justify building something like that.

>Why didn't they just level the site from space?
Plot armor.

All the conventions are coming down now, user.

>Its symbolic
Of what?
The film's stupidity?

You know what pisses me off to fuck and back?
They write this shit like megalomaniacal 14 year olds.
1st fucking movie in trilogy, they reveal and blow the up biggest Superweapon to fucking date in mainline movie series, just like that.
2nd Movie they blow up some new fuckhuge ship with some roided up conqueror lasers with fucking gravity bombers, THEN they reveal THE OVERCOMPENSATOR CLASS MEGA GIGA HOLLA HOLLA GET DOLLA ULTRA FUCK YOUR MOTHER 60 KILOMETER WIDE STAR DESTROYER THAT MAKES MORE STAR DESTROYERS INSIDE OF IT and proceed to blow it the fuck up along with half of the imperial fleet with a fucking HYPERSPACE KAMIKAZE, and then they do a fucking HOTH re-enactment, but this time their AT-AT's are twice as big and carry battleship lasers because fuck you and they also have GROND Baby Deathstar pulled by armored strandbeests, and all of these turn out to be a fucking wet fart.
So what the fuck are you going to show me in the next movie?
And supposedly another 20 you already lined up?
What the FUCK?

They used the yuge blast doors as the excuse, which honestly brings up even more inconsistencies

I'm more pissed about the Vong shit that pointed out

...don't ever become a writer, kid.

What does this even mean? Is it less cool then she says it is or more cool?

>OVERCOMPENSATOR CLASS
Kek

Wait, they DRAG the cannon from place to place? In an era of space travel?

>can only be used on near-perfect flat ground

*inhales*

This is my problem. It doesn't sound like Star Wars.

I thought the exact same thing when Finn said, "A boyfriend, a cute boyfriend." Like, that wasn't something that registered as Star Wars to me.

Why, do you hate FUN?

It is the new Star Trek, who fucking knows.

>Why didn't they just level the site from space?
Because it's Chekhov's Gun.
They used orbital bombardment to blow up the Resistance Base from the beginning of the film as the remaining ships were escaping, essentially nuking it from space.
They never use this tactic again because autism.

>The term "Battering Ram Cannon" implies that it's a cannon that fires battering rams, which isn't the case.

It's a cannon with the sole purpose of acting as a battering ram. Only effective against stationary targets. I mean this is a universe where they have ALWAYS named their weapons stupid shit that doesn't fit.

>lightsaber
>blade isn't in the shape of a saber, nor is it formed of light

>death star
>isn't a star

>star destroyer
>doesn't destroy stars

They still failed at reaching that level.

It doesn't show the full convo, she immediatly apologizes for swearing inbeteeen those frames

>Rian PoMo Johnson interpreting the Vong
No! That’s not true! That’s IMPOSSIBLE!

No, I like SENSIBLE fun.
I don't like AUTISTIC "fun" that serves as a detriment to SENSIBLE fun.

Unfortunately, it still doesn't make since for a ST show to have that.

Gotcha, now it makes at least some sense.

nu-Trek, everybody.
It's gotta earn that TV-MA rating somehow.

>“Playing it Safe Leads to Disaster” poster on the wall
So does breaking convention, at least when she’s the one to do it.

Search your feelings user, you know it will be shit.

DROID PLEASE

>Is a laser
>needs to be dragged 8 miles to be in range
>is a laser

we've known for years that disney doesn't care about the cannon

Sensible fun? What's that? Rey climbing into the ear of a giant alien with a lightsaber, skydiving away from an explosion grabbing hold of a spaceship the last second before hitting the ground, is pretty fucking cool.

how he fuck did they even deploy it?
I mean put it down on the fucking planet and why it couldn't remain on the thing that brought it in?
fucking parachutes?

It's not a battering ram, nothing says it's a battering ram on that page.

>is pretty fucking cool.
For autistic people who play Call of Duty every day, sure.

In the movie a piece of slow as junk is alowed to literally almost fly into it, and also be intercepted by another piece of junk from a 90 degre angle
>Move can't even make sense with its own explanatory book
Guess im just to dumb for this shit...

Can we have a "virgin siege cannon vs. chad Grond" pic?

Shit made me think of Galactic Battlegrounds, honestly. I was very confused by them bringing the pummel into the films when they were a gameplay mechanic first and foremost, and not even that great of one.