Place your bets on the new SOYLO Film

Place your bets on the new SOYLO Film

>Sup Forums pays money to see it and gets triggered

...

>"i don't need a man" female character

Han upsetting a Wookie

...

>rebellion meeting comprised mainly of women

>Han: "I love you."
>Strong female character: "I know."

Greedo shows up

Soyba fett

When's the trailer coming out so we can all downvote it and watch it get blamed on toxic masculinity?

>subverts your expectation

Woman Soylo loves dies

Han gets rescued by a girl

Jabba cameo

Lando kisses a white woman while Han watches

Lando references his own blackness

Han meets Chewbacca

He'll do the parsecs run thing ruining the fun for us not really knowing what it is.

Post-credits scene is Han and Chewie entering the Tatooine Cantina

Lando teaches Han to be smooth and how to dance

I love you, I know gender reversal

Someone says "May the Force be with you" even though they got shit all to do with the Force

...

"I've got a bad feeling about this"

Origin story of the dice charms in the Millennium Falcon

>i-it's not canon

Someone gets their arms ripped off after winning a Space Chess game

cis wh*te male

I'll wew hard

>A situation where Ham fires/does not fire first

>seedy alien bar

>namedropping parsecs somewhere

>Hondo

Darth Vader cameo

never tell me the odds will be in there

>that holographic chessboard will be there somewhere

>theft of a starship followed by chase scene

Jabba the Hutt gives a speech about his right wing beliefs

Kessel run that soyboys will call "the most epic scene ever"

>Han is flying the Falcon low over the surface of Tatooine with Emilia Clarke next to him
>"Pull up!"
>Han pulls up just as a krayt dragon bursts from the sand
>"How'd you know it was there?!"
>looks at camera
>"Oh, I know a thing or two about dragons"

And glancing at CGI Alec Guiness and young Mark Hamill

This

Quads don't lie

>a giant space creature

>Chewie rekking stormtroopers

>Han accidentally shoots stormtrooper

>Soylo says "Never tell me the odds"

Han uses a Lightsaber

...

Han is shown to be a worse pilot of the falcon than a woman of colour.

He'll do the Kessel Run, ruining the joke.

>an ham-fisted attempt is made to make Lando a deep, heroic character because SJWs

He sees a rich girl and ponders "Hey, you ever think a princess and a guy like me..."

The big nose paki bitch is boba fett.

Dragon bitch kicks Hans ass, Landon ass and a whole fuckton of stormtroopers asses

Modern pop music instead of John Williams.

He picks up the blaster from a dead enemy who was shooting at him with it while thanking his corpse for the gift

>Scene where you would expect dancing Twileks
>There aren't any

Anything about his pants?

A scene where Han shoots first

Anything about his pants?

Salacious B. Crumb appears doing his laugh once at a funny scene.

Thinking that in kessel run the falcon won by speed not because it can endure more hazardous routes.

90%+ critic score ~50% audience score

btw: free (NOT working for Jabba) and dressed.

Nonstop oneliner jokefest.
Guaranteed Lando says something about how hard it is being black in the empire

Maybe we should combine a few spaces to be "female character does what Han does in the OT"?

I don’t think lando is going to reference his blackness. If dubs, replace with lando saying “hello beautiful” or whatever he says to Leia when they meet

Nah. The nominal lead is a fucking white Male, even if the movie is going to spend most of its run time emasculating him.

That is an automatic -200% from the critic score.

No Twileks

Done

nnice.
yeah it wont be that explicit, but i'd bet something do with being oppressed for some reason comes up

I second this motion. It's taking up too much space and we have so much hackery to predict

>"Yahoo!"
>"Laugh it up, fuzzball"
>"Boring conversation"

etc.

>66
I sense great power in you.

Female speaks wookie, Han can't

The critics will be slightly more honest about this one in an attempt to regain some credibility after TLJ, so it will probably wind up in the 70s when all is said and done. The audience score will also be a little more forgiving since expectations are lower, probably in the 70s also

...

C3PO and R2D2 cameo for no reason

JUST LIKE ROGUE ONE

This is definitely going to fucking happen. He's going to make some sideways mention about being the only nigger around blah blah blah it's so hard for blacks even in space galaxy

Rogue One is sitting at 85% critic score on RT, you should either lower or expand the limit of the predicted critic score for Solo.

i'm guessing 84%

What about the blaster origin story (taken from a guard/enemy and picked up with a quip)

>blaster origin story
???

add a quipfest as a free space

Probably the waistcoat too

This. Salacious Crumb UNA! scream or laugh.

After its finished, I'll leave it open to any changes you guys think it needs

You and i think alike. I also predict the movie to do relatively ok (compared to the OMG IT'S WATERWORLD 2" expectations

they're going to have to reshoot this entire movie now thanks to this.

Itll b teaching Han how to fly the millenium falcon. The falcon was literally nigger-rigged by Lando.

"Nevah touch a black man's laser cannon!"

I was going to say quips should be the free space but half this stuff is probably free

Movie ends with Chewie and Han entering the Cantina

calling it now

You need c3po and r2d2 cameo.

Some shitty pre-redemption redemption arc that invalidates his arc in the OT

I assume they already did because of the RLM video

top kek

...

I fucking love Salacious b Crumb. Am I the only one?

Some sort of passing reference to carbonite

kek

...

Seconded

>millennial falcon
Nice

...

Woody is the main bad guy but not a compentant nor interesting bad guy. He will be a bumbling baffoon who talks about capitalism and human superiority and other gobbledygook like that.

This is a film starring a white msn after all, they MUST subvert any good qualities that will bring up.

I'm guessing he's gonna see someone frozen in carbonite and say something like "Wouldn't wanna be that guy"

75/50 RT

>Woody Harrelson=bad guy
Let me run this by you: how about he is han’s mentor, but is incompetent, maybe a little evil, and gets the crew into trouble/debt with Jabba and yaas Queen has to save the day, maybe at her own sacrifice