Peter, my yoga class tonight got cancelled. Can you be a sweetheart and help your dear old aunt stretch?

>Peter, my yoga class tonight got cancelled. Can you be a sweetheart and help your dear old aunt stretch?

Remember when the Aunt May in the last Spider-Man movies talked about how much her character and those movies sucked ass and she just did the movies as a favor?

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eh i wish she was gray.

I approve of hot Aunt May. She's lonely after Ben passed

First Martha Kent now Aunt May. What the hell happened to the two most iconic capeshit mother figures?

Do you think Ben was just as young as her or was he an older guy with money that got a trophy wife?

Tony is his Uncle Ben

Advances in medical science led to healthier longer lives and younger bodies.

They realize that they're mother figures, not grandmother figures

Young Aunt May bothers the shit out of me. Completely ignores how her old age and failing health were a huge source of conflict in the source material.

>can i smell your farts this time Aunt Meme?

No way, fag.

Eh, she'll just get some disease at some point. Hot younger May bothers me too but it's mostly just "not muh".

I remember that in the 90s cartoon Peter wouldn't
tell her about being spiderman cause he feared
that she couldn't take the surprise and get a
heart attack or somethin

Remember when the Aunt May in the first Spider-man movies was amazing?

Why most aunts aren't 40 years older than their nieces. If anything it makes sense for her to be young.

uh oh

wait a second, yoga class at night? where the hell does she live that there are yoga classes at night? all the ones in my area are only between 8am and 12pm with 1 at 5am on Friday morning; I checked

On one hand, I get that it's more realistic for Aunt May to be in her 50s instead of a little old lady. But it still feels weird.

And she was absolutely right. Those movies were shit.

Yeah, Rosemary Harris was a gem in those movies.

why did you check that

The woman I'm in love with (my aunt) does yoga and I stalk her.

So it's one of those patreon porn games now. Ok.
>Peter, my yoga class tonight got cancelled. Can you be a sweetheart and help your dear old aunt stretch?
> - Sorry, I have too much homework (Lie, -10 rel)
> - Yeah sure, be right there in a sec (2 hours, +10 rel)
> - I'm gonna stretch you with something old alright. ( 30% chance, +10 love, +15 rel)

Which one will Sup Forums choose?

>Young people can't have failing health

NYC definitely has late night yoga.

How old are your aunts? Mine are barely approaching 60 and I'm 29. I never got why Aunt May was always depicted as an 80 year old when Peter isn't even out of highschool.

She is but you can't see it.

But I wanna see it.

yoga is a good way to build strength and muscle tone without looking like a fucking freak

plus you meet hot people like, constantly

Pics or gtfo

I just assumed Peter's grandparents had his dad when Uncle Ben was an adult or something.

>29
>still visiting Sup Forums

You know, that source material that has been adapted twice already. The one where, currently, Aunt May isn't even important anymore and where she actually died once.

>he doesn't know.

How old are May and Ben supposed to be in 616? I remember reading that they're like 20 years older than the other kids' parents.

To be fair she's his aunt, not his grandmother.

Plus its CURRENT YEAR afterall, advances in medicine and cosmetics mean people can look younger for longer.

I'm 29 too. What's that statement of yours supposed to mean?

You mean how she would constantly be resurrected at the expense of Peter's character as an adult? Fuck off user.

You'll never make it with that kinda attitude brah.

I'm 30 last month.

I tried looking, but no definitive number.

/fit/ please leave

Bless him. He'll learn.
DO IT FOR HER

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Sure thing auntie, ehehehehehe

Nah, I've had sex a few times. Wasn't all that great

>I'm 28
>been here since 2004
The ride never ends

>implying no one over 24 ever visits this site

Get a summer job, kid.

Did you loved her?
In my experience, hookers doesn't feel as great as someone you feel something, I got depressed the day after because of it.

I'm 70 year old neet virgin who is waiting for parents to die to get their money.

What will you even do with that money? Buy more diapers, prunes and loli doujins?

So who would you cast as Aunt May? Because I would've gotten Laura Roslin's actor.

>that moment when your 15 year old son already grew out of comics
I don't know who is more dissapointed of the other.

Don't worry. In ten years you'll wonder how is it possible you haven't left this place yet. Your life will go on ( I got married, have a full time job, etc) yet you can't seem to escape the grasp this place holds on you. Still better than going to reddit though.

where do you live? the countryside?

>I got married, have a full time job
Prove it.

Is there a reason they decided to make Aunt May a hot young woman?

Why would I want to ever leave? This place is fucking hilarious. There's always some shit happening that you can always count on people behaving like retards about it. If I'm ever down, I only have to enter here and find a thread and in 5 or 10 minutes I'm laughing my ass off from all the retardness. It's great.

Now, spending all your day here on the other hand, that might be sad.

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She's not that young, just less ridiculously old as classic Aunt May.

Teenagers shouldn't be allowed on the Internet. You cause all the problems.

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Did someone ask for sexy aunt may?

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It's Ultimate Universe canon!

Yup, that's actually from the source material too.

I have Aunts that are around 30-40 years older than me. It's not that uncommon in large families, especially when divorces are involved.
Her being 60 is a little weird, but I could buy it depending on the family tree.

Best Aunt May. She still looked old but was also hot.

Thats an ugly chin

At least she has a chin unlike you, fatty

If I was a fatty wouldn't I have multiple chins?

Your neck ate your chin. That's why you grew a neckbeard

I wish, hate shaving, but hate facial hair more.

She wasn't wrong though.

Also hot May is hot, but that is fucking stupid. Rosemary Harris is the true Aunt May.

>your dear old aunt
>old
You don't get to play that when you cast a woman in her late 40's who looks like she's in her late 20's

She does not look like she's in her late 20's, unless she aged prematurely.

So will they do the "Peter's parents used to be SHIELD agents" thing now that they're connected or sweep that aside? Because I hope the latter.

It's more likely in old age and it makes it easier for Peter to hide his identity because Tge disparity in age makes it easier to bullshit and also makes it feel more like betrayal if May finds out he's lying.

How did you make it so long without a job? Lived off your parents the entire time?

Is this canon?

In a film from the fifties, she could have played a teenager. How times change.

summer was a mistake

it was considered scandalous back then. Hollywood still does it today, only with teenagers in high school. They never get 15yo for 15yo or 15yo, 16yo for 16yo, they get 20 year olds or older because of "muh acting experience" and "you can't show young people having sex and taking drugs, but you can show 22 year olds pretending to be 16 year olds doing the same thing!"

I even forgot they did that in this fucking movie. That's how prevalent it is. 21 year old plays a 15 year old.

no, no one asked for trouble

Stay away from my nephew.

Savage.

She's supposed to look like a teenager's mother not you're mother. oldfag

There's also that pesky thing where teenagers legally can't work the same amount of hours as an adult and the issue of school work/travel.

In my heart it is

>condoms in 1950's
Yeah, nah.

That took place in the 1980's

Peter?

Raimi's Spider-man just generally had all around fantastic casting. Everybody felt perfect in their role.

Amusing detour, people have had 'condoms' since way back in the antiquities.

Mankind really likes to fuck, and not always have it result in children

Yo, that's why the Romans made that contraceptive plant extinct.

Bullshit. MJ was awful, and Peter was way too quiet and reserved
Stop acting like they had no flaws.

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Yeah dude, no way they had condoms in the 1950's! Also there was no color in the world until they invented it in color-TVs!

Came here to say that.

>a NORMAN JEWISON film