Take me somewhere expensive, Pete

Take me somewhere expensive, Pete.

how bout the vet u janky bitch

well how about a salon for starters

For Peter that's probably going to be Shake Shack. SmokeShacks and Cheese Fries all around!

Shake Shack is amazing desu, I would go there on a date with a crusty lady just to go there

Oh, yeah, I fucking love Shake Shack, they're one of the great things about modern America. I'm just saying that as a fast-casual semi-upscale burger place they probably qualify as "expensive" to lower-middle-class high school kid from Queens. They're where you go when you don't just want to buy a hot meal from a bodega.

>lower-middle-class
Would Pete be lower-middle? I mean, maybe when Ben was alive, but now it's just Aunt May and...does she even work?

I mean, I know they're always shown as struggling to make bills, which is why Peter has to get a job in the first place, but what the fuck does she do?

Alright TGI Fridays

>what the fuck does she do
Tony Stark.

>Aunt May makes her living on her back
Peter learned it from her.

>Peter has to get a job in the first place

Mary Jane was actually successful. Peter had to be taken over by a frigging super-villain to get out of his minimum wage job.

So, did she give tips to Gwen about how to bang a rich, stuck up industrialist?
Nah, Peter had already given up working for Jonah by the time Otto came along. In order - I think - he's been a photographer, a lab assistant, a high school teacher, a scientist at Horizon labs, and now he runs his own company. Which is about to go out of business.

did they tell her look as bad as you possibly can or something? jesus

>Hm? Sorry? What was that? I was miles away. See, the entire time you were sitting there in front of me with your tired face and your dead eyes droning on about how you're a genius underappreciated by your immature peers, I was thinking about the future. A better future. One where pureblooded white men, woman and children can read a book in a fucking library without being confronted by the shameless presence of an ugly little spic-negro mutt like yourself. What's the matter? Are you surprised? Did you think I was one of the good ones? Wake the fuck up and smell the roses. There's a war coming, mongrel. And I'll be damned if I'll let the brown bastards that have backed us into a wall spill a single drop of white blood. You want my advice? Go back to where you came from. You might find some shelter there, away from the civilised world you've set out to destroy. Me? I'll be here. Making green and killing beans, same as always. I'll be the saviour of my glorious race. I think our study session is over. Go home. And comb your goddamn hair. I wouldn't fuck you with a churro.

Jesus, did they have to bring in Raimi for this scene?

The times are a changing.

The part about being his race's savior was a little over-the-top but what Peter said here was in-character

>a photographer, a lab assistant, a high school teacher

Oh yeah, a stunning success.

>a scientist at Horizon labs, and now he runs his own company.

...which was after someone took his body over and made that shit happen. Peter's always been a slacker. No drive.

shakeshack is fucking expensive for what it is. but goddamn those shroom burgers are so good. i wish there's one in my city but there's only 2 in my state and they're nowhere near where i am.

He was a scientist at Horizon BEFORE Otto.

But you wanna talk about no drive? Otto, instead of getting fucking rich off his inventions, spends his entire life getting punched in the face by a schoolboy. He goes on and on about how he's Spider-Man's greatest nemesis, even going so far as to claim he's far more so than Norman 'I fucked your girlfriend' Osborn. Then he fucks a midget.

She's kind of cute.

Is she one of those girls who refuse to use shampoos because they want to go all natural

>He was a scientist at Horizon BEFORE Otto.

Was he in charge of emptying the garbage cans? Cause they don't generally let scrubs without the right kind of degrees actually do science.

Meanwhile Otto made time to go back to school and that midget? Otto at least actually had a relationship with her. When's the last time Peter had a relationship with a woman that lasted more than a handful of issues?

A woman that isn't his aunt.

This is Horizon. It seems if you proved smart enough, they let you get away with the 'no degree' thing. There was a kid Watcher there for instance.

Otto's relationship with the midget lasted so long. What a happy ending they had!

>What a happy ending they had!

So you're just going to pretend that Peter's big relationships worked out so great? he sold one to the frigging devil and kinda killed his other one, you know, after she went and fucked his greatest enemy and shit out some kids.

lol

DIFFERENT TIME

Wow, way to put words in my mouth user. Hey, at least I don't have to mindjack someone's body just to get some pussy.

Talking about unrequited love, Otto really is two for two. I'm sure if Norman hadn't fucked her and given her AIDS it'd have worked out

>Hey, at least I don't have to mindjack someone's body just to get some pussy.

At least Otto was getting some. We all know Chicks *want* Peter, but he sure as fuck ain't tagging any of them.

> I'm sure if Norman hadn't fucked her and given her AIDS it'd have worked out

Hey, are we sure that Gwen didn't give Norman AIDS? I mean she does apparently fuck for money.

If Gwen gave Norman AIDS, then why doesn't everyone else have AIDS?

Checkmate, athiests.

> Bangs her in a Stark Tower restroom

I can see her reeking of piss as "it's good for my hair" with a save the Earth sign protesting Walmart or something.

>shittalking best grill Anna
You're winning yourself a tentacle in the face buddy.