Now Riddle me this Batman!! What has only two words but thousands of letters...?

Now Riddle me this Batman!! What has only two words but thousands of letters...?

You have exactly 15 minutes to solve this bats... if the time is up a specific building will be blown to bits... hehehe BEGIN!

The Mail

A containment camp

Post office

Why would Riddler blow up a building? He's usually into self-gain.

Fucker beat me to it.

Riddler, you and me know very well that the producers of this show never had the budget to afford close frame explosion effcts

Post Office, innit?
Why are yer gonna blow up the post office?

post office

He's dead Gorshin, he's not coming back.

He's not coming Edward.
I miss him too.
C'mon, let's get you back to Arkham.

it seems like the bat has some little helpers okay then how bout this one?

Riddle me this....What 4-letter word can be written forward, backward or upside down, and can still be read from left to right?

BOOB

Forty.

poop

A Sup Forums post.

THEY HAVE NOT BEEN DELIVERING MY MAIL!!
You stay out of this!! HE WILL SHOW!
HE ALWAYS SHOWS UP!!

dood, if you write poop upside down, it's not poop anymore.

Card aisle?
He's going to blow up Hallmark because nobody sent him "Happy Birthday"

But you can still read it from left to right. Riddle never says it has to stay the same word.

Riddler, are you planning to steal a vessel used to receive the washings of metallic ores?

NOON

so you're blowing up the post office at noon
why

I applaud you, but please leave these for the batman. I don't want my plan to be fully revealed!

SO riddle me this
What is big and yellow and comes in the morning, to brighten mom's day?

Homer Simpson's cock.

The... Sun?

Her vibrator.

that fucking giant fireball that shows up everyday, sun glaring my screen

A post office, at noon, and sesame street's Big Bird. What devious scheme could meld these three unlike things together? Why it's simple, really. You plan to rob the the post office, dressed as Big Bird, when they are sending out the day's payroll at noon to make the one o'clock train. With any luck, you'll be back in Arkham in time for high tea.

The school bus!

Dammit Nigma. Leave the kids alone. Don't you have better things to do? It's just going to end with you in a body cast again. Just pick up a hobby or some shit, get a job....Fucking bum.

HAHAHA I KNEW YOU WERE ALIVE YOU OL BAT... it's good to have you back, and I see you're the only one to get my plan. Bravo Detective bravo

I've figured you out, the answer is a riddle!

H-how?!

Holy Hastings, Riddler. It hasn't even been a month. Perhaps it was foolish but I expected a little more time for the city of Gotham to grieve. He cared so much about you Riddler, he cared about everyone. Don't dishonor him like this. The wickedness of a Supercriminal is immense, but their potential for good, is equally so. That is what Batman said everyday and every night no matter the outcome of a fight. If only one of you gave the city the chance for rehabilitation, maybe...just maybe the actions of a crimefighter would have all been worth it. Please Riddler...please, become an ally, become a citizen for your city, and your genius will be rewarded.

now im sad

A hero's work is never done, no matter what their uniform is, nor their methods.

Please, Edward. We have to stop this. A mind as magnificent as yours should be bent to the betterment of man, not criminal calamities. You know as well as I do that I won't be able to do this forever, and neither can you.

What in bloody hell are you babbling about boy? The Batman is alive I'm talking to him as we speak! Hell he is right in front of me! I got a riddle for you boy!
RIDDLE ME THIS! A boy fell off a 100 foot ladder. But he did not get hurt. Why not?

Hey Batman. Why don't you just rape him?

dont you have anything better to do Gordon?

He was on the first step.

He was on the first rung of course.

Yes. Helping Batman keep Gotham safe. And there's only one way he can do that.

And stoop to the level of a common criminal? I'd sooner hang up my cowl.

The ladder was flat on the ground. Edward, please! Remember all the fun we had the time you left criminality behind for a while? Remember the parties we went to, that we got kicked out of?

Holy Hallucinations, Riddler. You're delirious, a common symptom of grief. Why can't you see reality for what is is, or is that your delirium, that you see life as one big riddle, a confounding conspiracy.

He'll just keep telling riddles. Day in and day out. There's only one way to shut him up and you know it. Rape him. It doesn't have to be fast, just a quickie. Me and the force will look the other way.

Even now Riddler, you're hearing gross remarks about Batman doing unspeakable acts to you. You know he would never stoop to such a perverted act. See what's right in front of you, man!

I... I just want it all to end Bats.... when I heard you were gone. I felt like I was hell.. I didn't want to believe it. If you really are gone and are just a spirit.. please for the love of riddles take me TAKE MY LIFE NOW WITH YOU! I don't want to be in a world with such inferior minds!

Riddler...There is no Batman in this thread

Robin... Dick... it's time. Take up the mantle he always intended to pass to his heir.

...you are far too old for shorts, and at this point in your life those shorts are just embaressing.

Riddler, please I implore you, consider rehabilitation. Consider the new, brighter step of redemption in a long and beautiful path. Join the righteous path and perhaps the other super criminals will join as well, as a final and noble wish for Gotham's white knight. I know you can do it Riddler, you only lack the motivation. Let Batman's vigil wherever he be guide you, to prove your intelligence through resourceful crime fighting and community service. I believe in you Riddler. Batman believed in you.

I know that my retirement was hard on you. But, the good times don't always last. A man of your mental caliber comes along only rarely. Don't waste it on my ghost. In time, people will forget the Riddler, but they might yet remember Edward Nigma. Please Edward, if not for me, then yourself.

Goodbye, my most amiable adversary.

Until the day is done, Alfred. Until I know I can do Batman good, with just one good deed. One act of righteous independence and the time will be right.

...

This thread got depressing real fast

In that case... Well, the world will always need the Batman.

Fine then if you won't listen to me here is my last and final riddle.

Riddle me this..Feed me and I live, yet give me a drink and I die.

>seals the only entrance of the room I'm in

Goodbye Detective

No! Here I am, Mister Nigma! Don't be so foolish as to end it all!

A fire will wither without fuel, Riddler. A fire can burn bright and warm with reason, with life. Edward...for once, don't be apart of a superstitious cowardly lot.

A CREMATORIUM. Jokes on you. West was buried.

DO A FLIP!

EVERYONES TALKING ABOUT HOW BATMAN IS DEAD, HOW HAVE YOU ALL MISSED THAT FRANK GORSHIN, AKA THE RIDDLER, DIED LONG BEFORE HIM IN 2005?

NONE OF THIS IS REAL! WE'RE TRAPPED IN A HELL OF OUR OWN MAKING!

Hey guys, I got back from-

Oh shit, wrong year

>A slip of paper is taped on the grave reading
"Riddle me this.. What is harder to catch the faster you run? Hehehe"

>so you plan on robbing the post office dressed as big bird and then set yourself on fire in the mail room, setting fire to all the paper, thus causing one of the biggest fires ever scene in Gotham. and by asnwering this question you have already sealed the door and thus you will die of oxygen deprivation with the fire you have set.
Eh, not really that original.

>This entire thread is just Robin hurled up into a corner in his cell at Arkham. Having mentally snapped after the death of Bruce.

Holy shit.

Oh look guys, Gold Cyclops is here to save us all.

Riddler, no one deserves to die alone with grief. I cannot condone this desperate act. Activate the batbeam on the door. You will get help Riddler. You will.

THAT'S BOOSTER GOLD
I mean, uh, no one at all. Get us outta here, Skeets

>DAT SINESTRO

>remember that time Booster Gold showed up in the wrong year?

BEEP BEEP BEEP

The Bat-Phone, now! Holy Callings! Who is this?

I'm glad you're the one who picked up Robin. I just wanted to wish you the best, and... tell you that I've always been proud of you. Good luck, my son.

why am I crying

Holy Hauntings! Batman...Bruce....whoever this be, whether a crank call or a Heavenly dial from the Beyond....thank you. You took me in when I had nothing, and ever since then you raised me up to be a better man. I can never repay you, but that doesn't mean I won't try.

Make sure to give Alfred my love.

Always old chum. Now come on Riddler. The first step towards redemption is knowing you will always have some behind you to catch you when you fall.

Now I'm sad

I have to go now citizens. But remember what you've always heard from Batman, and what you always know: Justice will prevail, same Bat time, same Bat channel.

Same bat time
Same bat channel

Somebody please save this thread

did you notify the post office of your change of address when you moved to your new hideout?

Your breath.