Justin Roiland

Hey Justin.
I'm aware of your lifestyle. I know when you make time to browse Sup Forums. I know you're seeing this right now.
So lets cut to the chase, talk shop.
I'm thinking next big thing, I'm the funny guy, with all the ideas. I got that inital meeting with Harmon style wisdom without the follow up meeting with Harmon insecurity.

So here's what's happening. Here's the next big thing.
First of all, next season, Rick's catch phrase is gonna be a sort of zinger reaction where he hands out Pickle Ricks. Basically whenever someone says or does something Rick would usually call stupid, he instead reaches in to his coat pocket and gives them a buisness card with a picture of Pickle Rick on it, as well as either a word balloon on the card that reads "I'm Pickle Riiick!!", or a speaker built in to the card that vocally says "I'm Pickle Riiick!!"
Depending on the situation, Rick can follow that up with anything. A hasteful focus on the issue at hand, a smug, mocking grin, even just pure dismissive indifference.

Ah, you're seeing now the depth of my understanding for this character.
Strange, isn't it? It's as though I'm in your head.

I think another great idea would be to, during Morty-focused scenes, surround him with a too-much-benidryl sort of fog. All around the screen. Possibly spiders, webs, and moving shadows as well. Occasionally have him snap to look at this figments, only to have them completely vanish before he can focus on them.
This should occur all season, in every situation.

Like what you hear? I can go on.
Perhaps we could discuss this further in person, in the alley to the side of the 99 Cent Store on Lankershim in North Hollywood, tonight at 6.
Until then we will speak through this thread.
Let me know what you think, Justin.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=ijD4SWp5qYA
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

I...user, what have you done?

fuck, this is getting old. Can we keep all the rick and morty shitposting in one thread?

>I think another great idea would be to, during Morty-focused scenes, surround him with a too-much-benidryl sort of fog. All around the screen. Possibly spiders, webs, and moving shadows as well. Occasionally have him snap to look at this figments, only to have them completely vanish before he can focus on them. This should occur all season, in every situation.
What the hell?

Best thread

By getting told an idea or suggestion, he's legally obligated to not use it. I'm being serious, that's actually a thing.

I wish justin got his own capcode just to reply with some savage bants to posts like this be they ironic or not

Please, sir, be quiet. I'm having a conversation with Justin.

Mr. Roiland, let's talk about Summer. I like the nihilistic attitude she has accrued in the last couple years of living with Rick, but she's a teenager. I want her to be sadder.
She should spend the first few episodes next season quieter and sadder than usual. No later than episode 5, we reveal her descent in to the world of prostatution.
She's a pretty girl, bit of an egghead, rather flat features. I want her to spend the first two acts of season 4 episode 5 expressing how beautiful her sugar daddy makes her feel. This plot thread should be entirely dropped by the third act of that episode and not acknowledged again.
Cap it off by building an episode around the scene from the season 3 intro featuring two armed Summers nodding. No references to her sadness or that plot line ever again. Treat her like a badass that whole episode.
Really give those reddit fans something to overthink.

That sound's like a stupid ass idea, my nigga.

Sir, I know you're pretty well read in "The Philosophy of Weird Al", but I am an artist and this is Sup Forums. I am talking to Justin, not to you.

You think I'm gonna fuckin, call my LAWYER? If I see MY IDEAS ON RICK AND MORTY? Do do I look like, Ethan "every penny" Klein?
I am an artist.
An artist just wants to see their ideas brought alive. Sir, this is Rick and Morty. Rick and "Mr. Poopybutthole" Morty. Rick and "intergenerational three-way" Morty. You think the court of law is going to believe me over Justin mother fucking house of cosbies googas mountains Morty Roiland?

Fuck no.

This is some good pasta.

Excellent, friendo. Lets move on.

Before we delve further in to the characters... Yeah, no, sorry. We gotta deal with this.
We gotta talk about the wacky voices.

Those kids, the kids on the internet. They love the wacky voices.

Mother fucking Justin "doesn't even try to pretend kalaxian crystals isn't his codeword for coke anymore" Roiland and Alex "my character doesn't really have much of a bit beyond the mr. krabs thing but he sounds funny so they lap it up" Hirsch (sounds super Jewish by the way) can literally make a grand in three minutes by singing in their goofy ass voices they've been doing for almost 20 years. Clearly, this is a big contribution to the success of the show.

Justin, I have no further notes regarding the voice bits.
Moving on...

Alright, Justin. I don't really have anything to say about Jerry. But dang it, I'll try.
He has been in a strange place lately. Many got comfortable with the interpretation of Jerry present in the opening scene of Wedding Squanchers. I lay blame for the state of current Jerry on that scene. It can't be helped, that's the position the family was built in to by that time in the run of the series. I feel like lessons were learned, notes were taken and a lot of precaution was taken this season to get the family back to around 201 status.
Many blame the current state of Jerry on intrusions by Dan, some sort of agenda built around his personal life. It's unfortunate that Dan has been put in to this position, as that's clearly not the case.

I wonder if some of the blame can be laid upon Parnell, and his influence.

I'd like to discuss this further in private, please put a mental thumb tack through this and pin it to your mental bulletin board

Lets get back to Rick.
I think he needs a new companion. Morty is fine and all, but I want to see the introduction of a new, lesser companion to shake the dynamic.

Yes, just like Noobnoob. But perminant.

Get ready for this, Mr. Roiland.

Introducing newest member of our menage a quad.

You know Rick, Morty, and Mr. Poopybutthole.
Now get ready to meet Pickle Rick.

Retcon the Pickle Rick concept and combine it with Simple Rick's wafers.
Pickle Ricks are sold by the jar in every corner of the Citadel. They're a beloved snack enjoyed only by Ricks. They're everything a Pickle Rick should be. Excited, intelligent, nihilistic, with a wicked sense of humor. 100% on board with Rick, all the way.

Season 4, episode 1. Rick and Morty return from the Citadel, groceries in hand. As Morty puts the groceries away, Rick opens the jar and starts eating Pickle Ricks. They applaud him. He loves it.

Quick cut.
Morty is just putting away the last of the groceries as Rick is about to bite in to the last Pickle Rick in the jar.
"Ah, the last Pickle Rick..." Rick begins. "Is there a sweeter in the universe?"

Pickle Rick responds. "Only taking care of you, Rick!"

Rick begins to glow. Starts shooting the shit.
The two hit it off, become close buds.
A couple scenes to demonstrate Morty's growing jealousy, Rick's growing tendencies to dismiss him in favor of Pickle Rick.

Rick fills him with a fluid so he won't ever rot.
Morty is growing anxious. She shadow people are harassing him.
"Rick, isn't it time we went on an adventure?"
"Good news, Morty! Pickle Rick is coming with us!"

Episode goes on, they experience great peril, and during the climax, Morty is rescued by Pickle Rick.
Morty detests this. He can't stand he. He's being replaced.
But Pickle Rick is here to stay.

Over the course of the season, Morty's suspicions grow. Pickle Rick may not be everything he seems.
The season arc is in motion.

Production of Hot Topic t-shirts are increased a thousand fold.

the reason you are writing fanfiction on Sup Forums instead of writing for an actual thing is because you aren't funny

My nigga, stop this shit. It's terrible.

Sir with all due respect, I am having a conversation with Justin.
I think it's going well. I think I'm about to land a JOB, this is big for me. I have one day left in my Hollywood apartment before I'm out on the street, a homeless vagabond. My meeting with Justin is going so well but sir, quite frankly, you're embarrassing me in front of Justin and his friends.

Please, allow us to continue our conversation in peace.

Hey nigger
Go post this on his subreddit or something literally no one gives a fuck

>That one time Justin sent me like a paragraph of input on my idea two years ago via email
>This guy is being a total fucking idiot even though I guess he's not very different from me

What if this whole string of posts is Justin and he's getting the ultimate laugh on me now that I've posted this?

rick and morty is aurtistic

Excellent, you're at attention.

First of all, lets just clear this up. I'm aware you're not actually Justin, as I'm having a conversation with him. But your serve my purpose well enough as an avatar, so to speak, so I'll allow you to keep playing.
Keeping in line with the last line of thought. Collaborators, is certainly the key word in the directions when it comes to baking this pie we call comedy, isn't it.

Lets talk guests.

I believe we need a gimmick, a hook. No one cared that Susan Sarandon (sp?) was on our show. To 94% of our fans, she wasn't even Susan. She was the therapist.
So here's the hook. All season 4, every guest is named Justin.

I have completed scripts for a plot where Morty befriends a normal, single boy his age, voiced by Justin Beiber.
A one off character that will become an instant fan favorite. They're just two friendly, normal, single, high school aged boys and nothing weird happens. Shippers will EAT IT. They'll draw about it, write about it, live for it. For years.

Another script sees Justin Timberlake as a normal man who gets his hands one the Meeseeks box. He's quickly hit by a car and the box isn't used at all. The rest of the episode has nothing to do with him.

Justin Theroux as a watchful UPS supervisor who stalks Jerry on his delivery route as he fumbles through his new job as a UPS driver.

Justin Chatwin a criminal on the run from the law who kidnaps Summer and intends to use her as a hostage. She tricks him throughout the episode in to falling for her. At the end, she tricks him in to letting her suck his dick. She bites it off and escapes.

That's all I've got as far as complete scripts but clearly there's a lot happening up there.

you're not funny, stop

Oh, I've got another one.

Justin Verlander teaches Rick the confidence to swing a baseball bat that his father never taught him, ultimately helping him take steps in overcoming his father issues.

See, Justin? I can't stop this machine.
99 Cent Store alley. Lankershim. North Hollywood. 6. Tonight.
The scripts are yours.

You will regret it if you don't meet this fan in that alley.
I promise, if you're not there, I'll make you regret it.

See, Justin? They respond to my work just as they respond to new episodes.
It'll be seamless. It'll flow.

Waiter, my compliments to the chef. This pasta is fresh and decadent.

What?

Alright guys, OP here with the update.
Talked to Justin, lovely guy. Very friendly. Down to Earth, in a "funny kid you wanna be friends with" kinda way.
He says I can call him Justine, which is sort of like a personal thing for him, which is cool. Also offered to let me bang Riley Reid which was super cool. Weird that she has a husband but hey, not my business.
We discussed my ideas intimately and are having a second meeting next week, I got his phone number. Not his friend phone, his Lazzo phone. Real prestigious.

Strangely he preordered ticked for us to see Star Wars 8, like right there on his phone. Just sort of brought it up himself and decided we were seeing it together not opening night but the morning after. All very unusual but cool.
He also told me to keep posting, so expect more of that in the coming minutes.
Cheers, Justine.

Oh, and I don't wanna spoil season 4 too much... But expect a LOT more Pickle Rick.
And a LOT less Harmon.

Is that a dildo or a pipe?

Crack pipe

OP here.
Disregard all the above posts. I suck cocks.

Justine.

Fucking inspired.

Get this.

Season 5's guest star gimmick;

Every one off character voiced by a celebrity is named Justin on the show, but none of the guest stars are named Justin this season.

Every episode features a completely different Justin.

15 year old African American Justin, voiced by Jaylen Barron.

Evil space pirate Justin, voiced by Ron Perlman.

Jerry's coworker Justin, voiced by Jeff Rosenstock.

Summer's recurring boyfriend for the season Justin, voiced by Rivers Cuomo.

President Justin, voiced by Hilary Clinton.

What do you think, bud?

OP here sorry for the wait I was banging Riley Reid
Guess what, everyone. I'm directing a film, starring Roiland and Rick and Reid as Morty.
It's called Dick in Morty: a porn parody.
Spencer Grammer, Chris Parnell and Sarah Chalke are getting down as well, in character.
The plot starts off with Rick explaining his new invention to Morty. It's a body de-render machine. The point of the machine is to immobilize the subject, priming them for an easy mind switch in his mind switcher machine. Morty (Reid) explains to Rick that he's tired, and paranoid because of shadow people and spiders that are always just in his peripheral vision. Rick, annoyed with Morty, fucks his boipussy.
They fuck for awhile, until Morty passes out. Rick remarks that he didn't even need the de-render machine for that, and switches bodies with Morty.
Morty is now played by Justin and Rick is now played by Reid.
Morty, in Rick's body, naps on the floor of the garage. Rick, in Morty's body (Roiland), decides to go fuck Summer.
After a brief but funny scene of Rick trying to act like Morty, Summer says "about time" and they fuck for awhile.
At the end, Summer cries "Grandpa Rick", revealing she knew all along.
Meanwhile, Beth and Summer are arguing. They enter the garage. Beth comments on the fact that Rick is sleeping on the floor. The two argue a bit more, when Jerry sees de-render machine. Not knowing what it does, he threatens Beth with it. It accidently goes off, knocking Beth out. We watch Chris Parnell bang unconscious Sarah Chalke for almost 20 minutes.
Afterwards, a satisfied Jerry attempts to wake her up. He accidently uses the mind switcher. Jerry is now in Beth's body. He always wondered about having a vagina, and decides to test is out.
He runs in to Rick in Morty's body. Jerry in Beth's body pins him down, and says "you've been naughty, son." Rick thinks about his mom and gets hard. Jerry-Beth then starts using his pussy to fuck Morty-Rick. Rick-Morty begins to wake up.
/pt1

>Beth and Summer arguing
Beth and Jerry. So sorry, fans of mine and Justin's show. We know how important continuity is.

Yo Justin I ain't posting pt 2 until I get my first paycheck

Sir, please, I need to see all your ideas

Not til Justin delivers the check.
If you guys want more then demand it vocally from Justin, in this thread and on his Twitter

Sup Forums, do you want Dick in Morty or not?
We left off with Jerry and Rick fucking using Beth and Morty's bodies respectively.
The whole thing is gonna be canon

I want it all

I told you Justin, send the check and we can start filming today

If you don't give me that fucking info right now, I'll come to your house personally and I'll hit you with my truck over and over again until you have no choice but to give me every single last drop of it.
I am fully prepared to ruin your life if you do not give me that information, do you understand? This is not a game, I will actually come over to your house and I will do everything I have told you that I will do.
Give it to me.

>tfw need an agent in order to even submit ideas

One, Rick needs to be louder, angrier, and have access to a time machine.

Two, whenever Rick's not on screen, all the other characters should be asking, "Where's Rick?!"

Dan Harmon here, I've been playing with the idea of an episode where rick gets his dick cut off by summer or some shit because haha incest is popular and he replaces it with... PICKLE RICK!!!
but, hold on, the whole episode is also filled with very subtle ideas about what masculinty really is. For instance, at one point rick puts on the animal talking device from episdoe 8 of season 3 and talks to a squirrel about his pickle rick dick, all the while pickle rick dick is making jokes about poop butts, abd the squirrel(played by bill nye because haha popular) and the squirrel says masculinty is gay or some shit and that marriage is a scam because my wife is a cunt or some shit

You think they'd ok that?

Op here
>Dan Harmon
>Knowing what masculinity is

Is this Justin pulling a prank?
Where's my check ya goof

This makes no sense. You're referring to Pickle Rick as though he's a seperate character than Rick, but he isn't.

Underrated post, by the way

Read the thread, retard. OP retconed Pickle Ricks to be a mass produced sentient snack with attitude enjoyed by all Ricks.
He and Justin have been close friends for awhile now.

Justin Roiland here. I'm in the alley by the 99 cent store. Where you at OP?

>Rick is about to bite in to the last Pickle Rick in the jar.
>eating a whole jar of pickles that fast
youtube.com/watch?v=ijD4SWp5qYA

Rick can do Mitosis replication because WUBBA HUBBA BUBBA SCIENCE

GOD'S IS DEAD.

>Not haunting behind the castle

The joke is that Morty put a bunch of groceries away by himself while Rick sat down and had a snack retard

oh

Yeah learn to read fool

fuck, justin threads are maybe the best part of Sup Forums

its like im waking up from a 10 year nightmare and Sup Forums was good again

>MORTY IM PICKLE SHIIIIITS

...

...

I like to believe Justin is still here during each week's episode shitposting with the best of em just like when season 1 was airing

Hey Justin you should bring back the Grandma's Virginity Podcast.

At first I sort of regretted not jumping aboard the Rick and Morty band wagon back in season one because it seemed like a really good show but I was too much of a lazy fuck to track down the episodes to watch.

But now seeing how completely autistic the fanbase has become I am glad I don't have to associate with these turbo autist by watch this show

>98 cent store on Lankershim in North Hollywood

I literally live on this corner

>some cartoons are banned from being posted here
>R&M has 10 shitposting threads up at a time

good shit guys

Well those threads are anti-R&M. So it's not like a 10 general threads situation.

you are very correct

I don't believe you're stupid enough to believe OP likes Rick and Morty.

>not the one about jerry
you fucking moron

The only people less funnier than the people who got overly excited for pickle rick are the people who constantly bring it up as if it didn't lose all of it's relevance after the episode like OP