I AM GOING TO STEAL THE CROWN JEWELS FROM GOTHAM'S HISTORICAL MUSEUM AT 3:00AM, ON THIS COMING SATURDAY...

I AM GOING TO STEAL THE CROWN JEWELS FROM GOTHAM'S HISTORICAL MUSEUM AT 3:00AM, ON THIS COMING SATURDAY. I WILL BE IN ACCOMPLICE WITH CAT WOMAN AND THE PENGUINE.

WE'RE GOING TO MAKE OUR ESCAPE VIA GYRO COPTER.

What could he possibly mean by this?

The letter is typed in all capital letters....capital...the Capitol building! The Riddler is going to kidnap congress!

Nice try, Riddler. You thought you could throw me off by telling me exactly what your plan is, but I can see there is more to your evil visage than meets the eye.

You claim you'll be stealing the Crown Jewels from the musuem. You would think people would assume crown as in a royal headdress. But crown could also mean the highest point, like the crown of a person's head. Therefore, you actually intend to strike from the top of the highest building in Gotham, where the CEO of one of the top companies in the city is planned to arrive. You will no doubt hold him hostage in exchange for whatever your twisted heart desires.

Secondly, you have stated the date of your crimes to be this Saturday. Of course, Saturday is actually derived from the Roman word for "Saturn's Day", the Roman god whose name was later used for the ringed planet. The planet itself is set to align with the Earth and be visible in the sky this coming Wednesday! Everyone in Gotham will be busy watching the skies that day, a perfect distraction for your misdeeds.

Another claim of yours is that the dangerously manipulative Catwoman, and that slimy scourge Penguin will be your partners for this event. However, you seem to have mispelled Penguin as Penguine, the word meaning, "Like a penguin." This would be easy to tie into Penguin, however it is apparent his recent team up with the Joker has left an influence with that horrible clown of a human being. Therefore, you actually intend to carry out this ransom with Joker as your partner, a far more dangerous choice, for yourself and for Gotham.

It's a scheme so elaborate, I need a second post to finish deciphering it!

Finally, you have tried to give away your escape route as a Gyro Copter. The word Gyro can also be associated with the sandwich of the same name. The most famous Gyros in Gotham are sold at Sam's Sandwiches and Deli, which carries some of the fastest food delievery anyone has ever seen. Meaning of course that you and Joker expect to get away with your evil deeds by escaping in one of Sam's own delivery trucks!

Riddler, you are sick down to your own blackened heart, and only a man such as you could think of a plan so seemingly perfect. But you should know better, as I'll always be here to solve your perplexing puzzles, and your dastardly deceptions.

Christ

Holy Hoagies, Batman!

winrar

I'm impressed

No, I'm really going to steal the crown jewels from the Gotham Historical Museum at 3:00pm on Saturday with Catwoman and Penguin. I can show you the receipt for the gyrocopter rental if you like.

You said you'd steal it at 3:00 AM, Riddler, not PM. Don't humiliate yourself any more than you already have. Admit that you've lost.

Why doesn't Riddler, like... Not give any clues and just do the crime.

this is old as fuck

...

A typo in my original communique, as was the extra "e" in Penguin. I've been pulling a lot of late nights.

There's always been Riddler threads. Why shit on a classic?

He literally can't not give clues. It's a compulsion.

Another bizarre riddle. What does he mean by this, I wonder? Late nights...pulling a lot...what could it be?

NO, YOU GOD DAMNED RETARD

I WILL BREAK INTO GOTHAM'S HISTORICAL MUSEUM AT 0300 ON SATURDAY, OCTOBER 6TH, 2017 AND STEAL THE FUCKING JEWELS ON DISPLAY. CATWOMAN AND THE PENGUIN ARE IN ON THIS, AND ARE GOING TO HELP ME STEAL THE JEWELS FROM THE MUSEUM. ILLEGALLY.

WE'RE GOING TO ESCAPE FROM THE SCENE OF THE CRIME (WHICH TAKES PLACE AT 0300) BY A HELICOPTER THAT GYRATES RAPIDLY, HENCE THE NAME "GYROCOPTER".

EAT MY FUCKING ASSHOLE BATMAN, I'M SICK AND TIRED OF WRITTING THESE FUCKING RIDDLES.

Pulling a lot of late nights, you say? The timeslot most often taken by talk shows, including one at Gotham's very own local station, whoch provides wholesome entertainment to the masses. Surely, you are implying that you will also strike on late night, live television, holding the city's airwaves hostage, in addition to you and Joker's previous kidnapee.

Your sick mind has no limits, Riddler.

This is the Kind of batman i want back from Time to Time.

He's dead though.

It's been far too long since we had one of these

YOU CAN'T STOP ME OR MY LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE FROM VIOLATING THE FIRST LASY, BATGROMPF!

YOUR SHOW'S RATINGS ARE TOO OW TO TOUCH ME!

I can sense you are frustrated. You're repeating your same mistakes, and even providing new ones.

You chose to call me a "Retard", a word often substituted by Special, to appease those who are easily offended. Special is also used to describe extraordinary things.

Yet, you also command me to eat your asshole, asshole being used often as slang for a rude, or mean person. As many citizens may attest, the infamous Dr. Stevenson, a local famous doctor, would fit the type of "asshole" these people are talking about. And this very same doctor, despite his rude personality, is enough of a miracle worker at his job, that a ceremony is being called to award him a medal for his expert work. You could call a ceremony like this,

A special event. Just as I have feared, you seek to use Stevenson's award ceremony as part of your crimes, and predictably, take him as your THIRD hostage this Wednesday.

You're making this all too easy for me, Riddler.

You've forgotten about meeee! John Astin Riddler!

Le gasp

Can someone help me find the one where Riddler threatens to take the golden thesaurus or some shit? I think it's about 3 years old by now.

Fucking priceless, put me in the screencap

I remember the first Riddler thread after Adam West passed. It ended with Robin taking up the Cowl, Batman's ghost talking to Riddler and Robin, and the Riddler attempting suicide.

I was Batman that time.

Yes but you see that was just a false riddle if you want the real one come to the gotham gazzette's office at 4:00 pm on monday.

At 4, you say? Interesting choice of number, 4 is a common number among many famous symbols. Considered a number of luck, as shown by the symbol of the four leaf clover.

Luck is the feeling people want every day, to help to give them their desires. The people who are most supersitious about seeking luck would have to be compulsive gamblers. The type that freqently visit the Gotham Casino.

So, Riddler, you want me to come to the Gotham Gazatte while you rob the Casino blind? You can't deter me that easily.

Batman you need to calm the fuck down I'm not pulling a riddle here. You look way too deep into things

The Riddler is like a little baby. Watch this.

I, the Puzzler, am going to do...

A thing.

don't you start!

did anyone make a screen cap for that one? That shit was tight

GYRO COPTER, THE TASTIEST THING TO TAKE TO THE SKY!

Batman-Riddler threads are the only balm for my weary soul.

>Penguine, the word meaning, "Like a penguin."

10/10

Throw yourself off a bridge

im gonna kill some peopl like with guns and shit. fuck you you faggots

Way too deep?

The deepest one could get here in Gotham is at the bottom of the Gotham Lake, one of the record holders for deepest lakes. The very same lake which has recently been excavated to find the lost treasure of the famed pirate, Captain Scuttler, a perfect prize for you to steal, Riddler.

I could keep this up all day.

Penis

stop batman, it's not legal to own nigga's like this anymore

Batman, the Riddler is really going to just rob the place at 3am. I'm the fence for crying out loud!!! Do you realize how much mobsters, collectors and underworld brokers would pay for this? It's not a labyrinth of puzzles, it's a smash and grab!!

testing

Why doesn't Superman, like... not go near kryptonite and be weak to it?

Confound it Batman, would you just rape the Riddler already?

Once again, your own crooked, crippling compulsory conduct is your downfall, Riddler. You thought you could fool me by disguising your true treasure target as a juvenile cuss word, but I'm several steps ahead of you.
You tried to make me believe you said "Penis", when actually you said "Pen Is". As in, "The pen is migthier than the sword". As our history books taught us, Captain Scuttler, that perfid pillaging pirate was famous for not only stealing monetary treasure, but also for stealing invaluable cultural treasures like books, so the infamous illiteracy instigator could keep his target ignorant and so, vulnerable, as education and culture always have been the good citizen's biggest weapons against clearly crooked criminals like him and you, Riddler.

You want to steal the complete codices, charts and cartographical collection rescued from Scuttler's loot, which will be displayed on Gotham's museum this week. It's worth millions of dollars besides of it's incalculable historic value, but it's too late for you to even try, Riddler: the police will be waiting for you and they will have a nice and cozy cell prepared for you.
Crime never wins, Riddler. Scuttler himself could have told you that.

Oh wow I thought Riddler threads were over when someone made a few last summer but no one ever did the Adam West thing and answered them.

this is all just a smoke screen, he was actually stealing a Sup Forums birthday hat

Shhh, chum. The party hats were a gift, but let this rustled riddling ruffian believe he succefully stole something.

Damn it Batman, stop playing mind games with the damn Riddler and rape him!

Put me in the screencap

Bat-Bump!