Dumbing of Age. DOA. (Dump Out Ass.)

It's time for this bullshit again, and goddammit Willis is gonna BLACK Joyce after all.

Give me five reasons to care about Diglett over here, please. Even three will do! Because I don't give half of a shit about his character!!

Ummm, I'll give it a shot.

1. He's allegedly very smart.
2. He's increasingly showing up as a main-ish cast member now.
3. He's got a weird thing going on where he likes to insult Joyce but also compliment her?
4. I can't wait until Joyce's image of him shatters when she finds out that he makes fun of her on a regular basis, as a means of connecting with Sarah.
4.2. And how she feels when she finds out that Sarah is doing that with Jacob.
5. His glasses don't have anything to hold them on his face. Nothing on his ears or around the structure of his face.

...

>He's allegedly very smart.
Good thing you said "allegedly", because I would have asked you to prove it.

>He's increasingly showing up as a main-ish cast member now.
Showing up is one thing. Developing your character is another. And Jacob has shown up, but he hasn't developed his character.

>He's got a weird thing going on where he likes to insult Joyce but also compliment her?
So, it's a neg?

>I can't wait until Joyce's image of him shatters when she finds out that he makes fun of her on a regular basis, as a means of connecting with Sarah.
>And how she feels when she finds out that Sarah is doing that with Jacob.
That WOULD be interesting, but it would paint too many negative aspects. Plus, it's too complex a storyline for Willis, since it doesn't immediately involve roasting religion.

>His glasses don't have anything to hold them on his face. Nothing on his ears or around the structure of his face.
So his glasses ARE his eyes?

Now THAT'S impressive.

Stemless, rimless glasses has been a thing I've noticed in several web comics. Aubrey in Something Positive has them and it's super weird.

I feel a lot of sympathy for him for having to deal with Becky and Becky 2.0 all day.

Judging by his responses, he seems like a sane man trying REALLY hard to respond well to INSANE people

Like he is REALLY reaching to be calm and nice when he's forced to interact with shrieking retards

>Joyce
>Sex

Nah.

......Ehh......Nah.

...maybe anal.

OH SO YOU SAYIN YOU AN HIM DON'T BELONG AT THE SAME TABLE?

RACIST AS FUCK

>So, it's a neg?
He insults her a ton behind her back, so she doesn't really know about it yet.

I kinda like the idea that Joyce is aware of how messed up she is and understands that it impacts her relationships, and that she's got a real attraction to Jacob that she's trying to not admit.

Already revealed that Joyce believes buttsex is reserved for the sanctity of marriage.

Maybe oral.

Joyce should titty fuck Jacob right there under the table to prove how well-adjusted she is.

Jacob is a good guy, not a nigger like walky or amber.
But he is supposed to marry Mary, while Joyce marries Joe.
Don't dick it up willis, literally the only decent guys in the cast.

>not giving him a footjob
Sad!

Joyce isn't confident enough to unzip a guy's fly and get him off with her feet while staring him in the eye the whole time.

>Let's have premarital hanky-panky right here in the restaurant! It's a normal people thing to do on a normal people date, right? You're normal, I'm normal, this is kind of a date, I was told this is what you do on dates!
>You've been talking to Joe, haven't you?
>...Roz...
>Well Roz might have sex in noodle shops in the middle of the lunch rush, but it's not a normal person thing to do. Most people wait awhile to have sex, even if they're exclusive.
>I know, I just...Would any guy actually want me? I deconstruct tacos, count noodles, and have panic attacks because communion is different. I'm 18 years old and the only times I've ever been kissed it involved gay people. I'm going to be that weirdo spinster who dies alone and nobody realizes until the mail starts piling up.
>Joyce, you've been out of your comfort zone for what, a month and a half? Yeah, everything is weird and scary now, but what about next month or the month after? It's difficult and it's stressful but you're trying; that's more than you can say for a lot of people, including some of our friends. Your plan to have this awesome freshman year where everything goes right is off the rails, so what? You're young, you're attractive, and you've got plenty of time to find someone heterosexual to kiss you.
>...Would you want to kiss me? Since you know, you said I was attractive and all that.
>Yes.
>What about Raidah?
>What about her? We're dating, but she's not my girlfriend; we hooked up maybe two weeks ago and never said anything about exclusivity.
>...
>Fair warning though, I'm actually a butch lesbian. Super butch.
>The butchest.
>The platonic ideal of butch.
>Jacob, do you want to kiss me?
>I already said-
>No, right here, right now, but not here and not now because it'd be weird.
>I...think so, yes?
>Alright, it's settled. We finish lunch, kiss in the park for a bit, try not to think about grandma while doing so, and not tell Sarah because she might kill me in my sleep!

>Give me five reasons to care about Diglett over here
He's black
He's tall
That's all that matters really

You got it all wrong.

He's smart, tall, fit, sharp dresser, can connect with people, respectable member of society, gonna become an unremarkable upper middle-class some day.

She's a retard that can at most aspire to be an annoying tumblr celebrity.

If you should be worried about anyone, worry about Jacob.

Joyce is kinda cute with him, though. And he seems like a respectable guy.

That's actually a good point. Everyone in DoA is plagued with various flaws and can't help but being extremely shitty human beings since that's all Willis knows about, but Jacob is supposed to be intelligent, fit as fuck and living an organized, well-adjusted life. That's way more than anybody else in this shitty webcomic. On top of that he's not a dick to everyone and accommodates people the best he can. Truly, going by DoA standards he is the perfect man. Though I can't wait to see Willis turn him to a one-note cunt instead of developing his character more.

>She's a retard that can at most aspire to be an annoying tumblr celebrity.
That's Becky or Roz. Joyce is more likely to become that overbearingly nice and friendly woman at church who doesn't really have anything else going for her.

He and Sarah have talked about Joyce behind her back, but it was less malice and more bemusement/commiseration on his part.

>took a lewd prompt and spun it into something cute as fuck
Impressive, user. Just never do it again, you attention grubbing whore.

I do what I want.

Please don't. My heart.

>Hey Jacob?
>Yeah?
>Thanks for putting up with me and not treating me like a child even when I might've acted like one.
>We can't all be perfect all the time.
>And, umm, sorry about biting you when you did the tongue thing.
>I probably should have warned you before frenching you...and realized you had no idea french kissing existed.
>It was just shocking, and a little weird, and a little gross, and I tasted your lunch. But that doesn't mean I didn't like it! Maybe. We can try it again but not right now 'cause I'm still freaked out. But only a tiny bit!
>How about we just head on back to the dorm? I think you might have had enough new experiences for today.
>I think you might be right, but...
>But what?
>Could we maybe, if you wanted to that is, hold hands on the way back?
>Of course. I could even throw in an arm over your shoulder if you wanted.
>I don't know if I'm ready for that. Seems like a second date kind of thing to me...

I want a Joyce, goddamn you.

He was even a good character in Shortpacked, where everyone else was actively horrible. Bland, yes, but he didn't really do anything wrong.

He could be used as a voice of reason in DoA, but Willis squanders opportunities faster than the time it takes to drink a tiny cup of soda on an airplane flight.

The realization Joyce is having of her strangeness and Jacob's perfection (from her perspective) is really weird to me. But at least she knows she's a weirdo, not that she has to try and change or hate herself for it, but it's nice for her not to just be super proud of that.

But yeah, to Willis, "normal" seems to come along with "kinda boring." Similar to Ethan's first long term boyfriend in Shortpacked. Mostly nice and completely nondescript otherwise.

It seems more like he equates interests outside his own as boring. Which, fair enough, if he were interested in them he probably wouldn't think were boring.

He needs more reason to interact with the rest of the cast. He's got four links to other characters and two of those are practically a package deal.

I seriously don't get the "oh man Jacob is so handsome" thing. He looks like a fucking nerd and really is not even the type of guy a white girl wants to get B L A C K E D by (since most of it's about finding the hoodest guy around to piss off daddy).

>Bland, yes, but he didn't really do anything wrong.
That makes him actively worse. Being boring is way worse than being a trainwreck. Shit like Ruth or Amber are entertaining to read because they're so awful and it's funny watching how much more ridiculous drama and insanity Willis can pull out while insisting that we're supposed to find them respectable.

A character like Jacob just has nothing going for him. He's a robot. A dull, joyless robot.

Joyce's dad seems like one of the saner people in her life. It's more likely her mom woukd flip her shit at the thought of brown grandchildren

This is made funnier by how bland and inoffensive he is. I think it is almost impossible to have a genuine issue with him outside of him being...
>A dull, joyless robot.

Joyce's dad may not have defended Toedad after he brought a gun to kidnap his daughter, but he did compare Dorothy to Hitler when he found out she was an atheist.