User, why don't you have a baby? Babies are cool, babies are cute, babies are all what you need right now

user, why don't you have a baby? Babies are cool, babies are cute, babies are all what you need right now.

Babies, babies, babies!

Why have a baby when you can just focus on yourself and your spouse, no point in stunting yourself as an individual by having to care for another.

Also, Hollywood gets obsessed with specific topics like babies constantly, it's nothing new.

>life is just a garden of self indulging pleasures. My only duty to the world and my people is too live as comfortably as I can.
>no point in stunting yourself as an individual by having to care for another
Honestly with that attitude I'm glad you don't want to have children. The gene pool will be better off without you.

The planet is already overpopulated, where is written that i have to have a child?

Nigga I have $120 for the rest of the month to buy food. I can't support a kid like this. Shit, I can barely support myself like this. I'm not bringing a child into this fucked up hellworld. Maybe if I had daddy's money to rely on I would think about it, but as it stands, I am poor as fuck.

We're doing perfectly fine as a species, I'm not some self-obsessed idiot that has to vicariously exist through their children. If I ever did have children, I'd adopt because there are plenty of kids that already exist in need of loving parental figures, you dunce. Get over yourself and off your high horse, dick.

Those movies were months apart

No its not. And in the statistics that show having a child makes you happier

I'd rather have talking animals because at least they're sexy.

because I would need a woman to get one and those things are horrible

>In the statistics
>Source: My ass
Every time, you can't blanket "statistics" over every individual either. Not everyone wants to have children.

And some of us aren't even allowed by law to be near children.

Okay.

Storks was terrible.

Having a kid right now would fuck me over. I barely make enough to take care of myself, if on the off chance I somehow got pregnant it's gonna be abortion via celery seeds.

>not wanting to have a baby because you're poor
>implying no stability in life means you can't have kids
stay out of my gene pool

Too many of the little bastards already.

With their drool, and their poo, and their puke, and the whining...ugh. Never. Not once.

>With their drool, and their poo, and their puke, and the whining...ugh. Never. Not once.
So no different than being a tripfag, sounds like its right up your ally.

Babies aren't funny. Its usually the same jokes in every one of these. The only thing that did it alright was Rugrats.

I have some bad genetic health issues. I don't want to pass those on to my kid.

>meanwhile moahammed has 12 children from his 4 wifes livig on immigrant welafare

eh... nothing personal kiddo

Dude, having a child and expecting happiness is a like rolling the dice and flipping a coin and expecting happiness if you can land heads and get a number bigger than 4

Sup Forums threads are usually pretty bad, but half of this doesn't even feel Sup Forums related. Can't imagine anyone wants to talk about baby movies though

Politely saged.

>Good. Good. Don't have children. The world is already populated enough.

This so god-damned fucking much. You think the ugly, nerdy ones who don't club won't be crazy and cheat on you, but they're all crazy, they're all whores, and they all want to just get the most use out of you before disposing of you.
In the words of some comedian whose name I don't recall:
>you want to leave your woman because she's crazy?
>that's like wanting to sell your house because it has gravity
>what, you think there's options?

/r9k/ pls

he isnt wrong

Can we talk about how both movies had insatiably cute grade-school shotas and never showed their naked bottoms? Because that's all I care about.

Were you raised by a single father in an all male family or something? I understand depression because gilrs won't give you the time of day but outright anger/hatred like this is baffling.

because babies, until they are 6 years old are god damned parasites

Do you want to have kids just so you can take glamor photos of them and post them on your Instagram and Facebook and show off your ugly kids to strangers?

I dont have kids
Am i a good goy too?

I'm not in a financial situation where I can afford the extra food, clothing, electricity, and education required.
Also, I'd rather have a dog.

Sounds like your mummy didn't love you

I cant even take care of myself

>Taking money away from the baby food, baby car seat, baby clothing, baby toys, baby books, baby soap/wash, baby television programming, crib, pacifier, formula, and diaper industries
Yeah I'm sure the Jews would just love for you to not have kids, thus denying the support of their hundreds of industries that are centered around everyone having as many kids as possible. It's all in their plan to fuck over their own biggest businesses by undermining the schemes they've been running for the past several decades to encourage everyone to have big families and lots of babies, and how great and amazing babies are, and how happy they will make you (you know, like all those other industries that sell happiness because they totally care about your well-being and not just your money), and how you need to buy the best brand-name products for your baby if you really care about them and love them like you should. Not to mention, we need more babies to grow into students who will pay tens of thousands of dollars to get into college and university, and tens of thousands more to pay off loans.

Choosing not to have children fucks over "the jews" more than anything. Every baby you have puts at least $100,000 into the pockets of corporate investors.

Underrated post, should have been the first post

Low sperm count

I will, Tyrone. Having kids is a poor investment.

I'm an uncle of 14 kids, trust me - you're talking out of your ass.
My oldest niece is not a very "happier" woman since she had her kid too. Some people get happy from having kids, some don't.

By choosing to live a small and comfortable life, within your means, without buying into every promise of "happiness" that comes your way, is the best way to fuck over the extreme corporatism of the country. The only problem is: More and more intelligent people are realizing that we only have one life and spending most of it raising kids who may not even pay off in either physical or emotional ways is kind of a waste, since once you're dead you don't perceive anything. It's better to simply live how you want, and enjoy yourself, because once you're gone, you're gone. It doesn't matter what or who you left behind, you won't even know about it once your brain stops. This means that the only people having kids are dumb poor people, who are too busy buying into every promise of happiness and fulfilment that gets sold to them, to bother saving enough money to afford a good life for the first kid before they pump out 5 more.

This means our populations are growing faster and faster, but the proportion of intelligent members of those populations are dwindling rapidly. As a species, we need more intelligent, wealthy, and powerful people to have children and produce successful generations of thinkers and workers. Unfortunately, intelligent/powerful people are the only ones who realize how brief and limited our lifetimes on Earth are, while stupid poor people want to have a "big, loving family" that they don't have to afford, because they will "watch down on them from heaven" after they die, and "eagerly await them all in the afterlife to live together forever" when they inevitably follow.

First of all,
>implying a woman would want to have a child with me
Secondly, I take care of my nieces and nephews for a few days every now and then, and holy fuck it's the worst experience. There is no goddamn way you could convince me to do that shit nonstop for 18 years.

Kids can be a hassle why have one when everyone else is?

live in the real world sometime and youll understand

Because I have shit tier genetics and the chances are if I have any offspring they would not survive childbirth.

I for real have no idea why it's the mindset of people that one must have a child, end of story. Some people just don't want to have kids, why do you feel you get to choose for them?

My wife and I lost an older friend over this argument because he got so heated and autistic about our choice to not have kids. We agreed we might eventually have one child, or we might just adopt, but that we had no plans to have children anytime soon. And he flew the fuck off the handle and basically called us scum for not "wanting to put at least two more people on this earth to replace yourselves when you die." What the fuck is wrong with you people?

The best part is when they argue that you're being "selfish" just because you could, but choose not to.

Then, when you ask them for non-selfish reasons in favor of having kids, you get literally nothing. Even the few points they try to make that sound honorable and selfless ("I want to provide just one more child with a good life", etc.) get btfo when you ask why they don't adopt. If you're really in this to provide a good life for a kid who needs it, why don't you adopt one of those poor kids who didn't ask to be born into their shithole life, then turn their shit life around and give them a good life that you know they won't take for granted? No, better to just make a new kid and give them a good life while all those other suffering kids can rot. After all, if they aren't part of your genetic stock, they can just go fuck themselves, right?

Your taste is terrible.

Obvious troll is obvious

>having a child makes you happier

...

Mohammed also gets welfare for each of those kids and free blowjobs from his victims.

...

Same.

>This means our populations are growing faster and faster, but the proportion of intelligent members of those populations are dwindling rapidly. As a species, we need more intelligent, wealthy, and powerful people to have children and produce successful generations of thinkers and workers. Unfortunately, intelligent/powerful people are the only ones who realize how brief and limited our lifetimes on Earth are, while stupid poor people want to have a "big, loving family" that they don't have to afford, because they will "watch down on them from heaven" after they die, and "eagerly await them all in the afterlife to live together forever" when they inevitably follow.
So what you're saying is that Idiocracy was right?

Mine would survive childbirth but wish they hadn't.

Storks was alright.

>duty to have babies
I get the feeling you're the type who thinks of taxes as theft rather than duty, too.

>Storks
>Boss Baby
>Baby Driver
>Drive

That was one fucking weird as shit franchise. Can't wait to see the next one though.

>The gene pool will be better off without you.
It would be better off without most of us, there are too many people.

I, for one, don't object to franchises that offer fruitful supplies of quality western shota.

The planet is overpopulated because of niggers. Stop interfering with Africa and they'll go back to their native ways and the population will go back under control.

then stop sending them food!

I'd just off myself immediately after I have sex with a woman. Not like I can do anything meaningful for the world.
Shit, I'd just pull out a gun under a pillow and blow my brains all over the bitch after I'm done, though too bad I would never see her go to therapy after that, lel.

Tell that to China and India you dumb fuck

I like the way you think, you're my kind of fucked up.

>Can't wait to see the next one though.
you mean Drive Angry?

Tulip is cute! C U T E !

Storks was underrated as hell. Tulip being prime waifu material helps.

>Tulip being prime waifu material helps.

Would you prefer me shitting out a bastard every year and paying for my welfare with your taxes?

The reason China and India have a big population isn't influenced nearly as much by outside support. My point was reducing the overall population by a significant amount is very possible and not hard to do by stopping meddling in Africa. It's not as easy with India and China, though it would be great to have them drop in numbers as well.

If OP is a liberal then yes.

>My point was reducing the overall population by a significant amount is very possible and not hard to do by stopping meddling in Africa.
What's your plan then? Lay it all out for us.

>stopping meddling in Africa

Cut all ties, send no money, no help with infrastructure. An imaginary wall, if you will.

>All I've wanted to do since I was in my late teens was find a nice girl, settle down, have a bunch of kids, and live a regular, comfy life growing old and raising a family
>Every relationship I've had over the last 7-8 years has ended the same way
>One of us mentions the topic of kids
>She wants to have "like maybe one, or just adopt or whatever"
>I say I want a big family, five, maybe six kids, and I'd want them to be my kids
>I get the "it's just not working out" talk within a week or two
Trying to find a decent woman who wants kids and holds traditional values is an exercise in suffering

I have 3 sons. I think I've had enough babies.

You sound like an edgy 17yo. Serious question: how old are you? I'm 22 and calling BS on everything you said

I don't think that would have the effect you think it will.

Not who you were talking to, but I'm 27 and think *you're* full of shit, so what do now?

>son says he wants to be just like me when he grows up
>am a struggling animator/comic artist barely getting by on stock trades moreso than pay

bro that's not how you're supposed to do it. You indulge her and have one kid at first, since you're gonna be impregnating her the one initial time anyway. After girls have a kid and they have time to heal from labor, they go absolutely baby crazy (especially the closer they get to menopause over the years) and are way more open to having more and more kids.

>has a son

>Trying to find a decent woman who wants kids and holds traditional values is an exercise in suffering
You think that's hard, try finding one that doesn't want ANY kids. Something about that vagina just thirsts for child snot.

First off, those movies suck. Second off, where the fuck do you think we are?

Why would I kill myself when I have a son? It means I live my life for something besides myself. I have a purpose beyond just trying to always be happy.

Having purpose is better than being happy.

Storks didn't suck.

>being happy is my purpose

...

Why do I need a baby when I AM the baby?

>pic related

Number of LTRs? ONS?

The fact that you're asking that makes me think you don't understand the question, chad

>roughly nine months apart

>that's not how you're supposed to do it!
>you're not supposed to be open and honest about your wants and needs!
>you're supposed to lie and try to trick her into doing what you want
Oh yeah, that's a great foundation to build a relationship on.

You perfectly described trip users

Either samefag or Sup Forums is infested with more robots than I expected. Way to dodge the question, bucko.

I know your pain