If JJJ lived in Gotham and had a hateboner for Batman, just how screwed would he be?

If JJJ lived in Gotham and had a hateboner for Batman, just how screwed would he be?

Oh, he is getting screwed alright.

Wayne would just buyout the paper and fire Jameson.

Yeah, I could see Wayne doing this and forcing Jameson on a tight leash on Batman articles. Although since JJJ is traditionally pro-civil rights for everyone, that'd be the only major thing Wayne clamps down on.

Why would he rape himself?

That honestly feels pretty out of character for Bruce.

If he lived in Gotham, he would see what a violent psychotic shitshow the city is and
immediately attempt to get transferred to Central city or Metropolis.

Batman is the symptom but not the cure.
On the bright side, he probably get to bang Vicki Vale
but we all know he doesn't swing that way

And in his rage, he becomes The Journalist and swears revenge on Wayne and Batman.

I could see him going the inverse way and nudging JJJ to make Batman looks even scarier and dangerous in his articles to strike fear into the underworld.
>"BREAKING NEWS: Batman eats the livers of criminals."
So when he goes out at night to fight crooks they are already:
>"Oh God, please don't eat my liver!"

Jameson would hate Batman by virtue of him being a vigilante, but he'd also hate the GCPD. He'd unironically love Bruce Wayne though for charity contributions. Bruce himself wouldn't give a shit.

Batman would probably find the articles funny. Now if JJJ tried to unleash Scorpion on Batman's ass, then there'd be a problem.

This would be fucking hilarious! If the mouse ever buys DC, I want to see this! And I want the first crossover to be with Spidey.

Not very - Bruce doesn't just go out of his way to fuck with or beat the shit out of people who've done nothing wrong. He'd probably just shrug the negative publicity off, JJ's not even the first person who's shit on Batman in the news.

Clark would just get a job at the Bugle and write good things about Batman, citing journalist integrity and going off on a patriotic speech about how the media should stay neutral rather than attempt to influence the masses

What a fascist.

Clark'd handle Jameson pretty well.

I feel like Jameson would really like Bruce Wayne and idolize him while hating Batman with half the papers praising everything Wayne and Wayne Enterprises does and the other half hating on Batman

I could see this. Bruce doesn't want the media on his side. If it was silver age JJJ and he was funding the creation of "bat-slayers," though, he'd be taken down right quick.

Reminds me of this. Sounds like something old skinflint Jameson would come up with.

>Clark would just get a job at the Bugle and write good things about Batman
>citing journalist integrity and going off on a patriotic speech about how the media should stay neutral

So he'd be a hypocrite?

So what would Batman do to re-offenders?

Of course, he's a journalist.

That plan is flawless.

If you did a thing and in response your nipple was ripped off, wouldn't you think twice about doing it again?

What if their into that sorta thing?

Then they're kind of shit out of luck, being denippled is kind of a one deal thing...unless he can regrow his nipples.

Yes.

>Oh no, it's Batman!
>Darn!
>I'm going to get punished!
>Please, oh please, Batman!
>Don't regrow my nipples so you can rip them off again!

I was thinking more into mutilation in general. Like that clockwork guy from the first Hellboy movie (yes I know his thing was being addicted to surgery, but the same basic premise is relevant).