TICKETS PLEASE

TICKETS PLEASE

Are you real or is it a dream?

Do you accept payment in secrets?

What does your ticket say,Sup Forums?

ur a faget

fuck you

You don't need to see my ticket.

OH FUKK, MY POCKET.

Are you quite sure you want to do this?

Wait just hold on a sec...
Damn, this ticket app is a piece of shit!
I'm not even sure I can get a signal out in this arboreal hellhole.
Look, I can give you the card I used to order the tickets and that should be enough right?

I gotcher ticket RIGHT HERE

did you say "dicks?"

What is it with the sudden resurgence of this film and its memes?

I sure do my good man.

is this valid here?

memes and diiiiiiiiiiccckks

Sing?

...

No, Ticket

Sure!

So, Ticket please

Í̶̵̤̥̙̫͈̦̩̠̟̥̘͔'̧̞̥͎̣̮̗̝̮͉̙̩̯̖͕́D̨̦̫͇̳̟̞̥͙͍̘̙̣͡ͅ ̧̣͍̱̝̩̦͇̮̝̼̹̮̘̫͖̘̪͠R̸̷̛̺̜͉̺̱̬̭̝̹̙͕͠͝A̸̢̰̳͇̮͇̱͚͚͚Ţ̪̰̮͍̭͎͉̪͜͠H̺̖̫̩̦̰̀Ę̶̖̫̤̻̖̖̜͍̮̗͖͢Ŕ̮̗̮̯̙̪̜̕͜ͅͅ ̸̡̖̘̘͚̳̟͎̰Ș̶̸̛̜̮͎̜̞̠̳͞ͅI̸̵̡̪͎̭̰̪̝̹̫̦Ǹ̢̙̠̗̮͙͉͚͓̖͍̙̬̥̮̼́͞G̢̛̭̥̜̪̰͙͡͞!̷͚͚̣̱͞

Wh-what ticket?

>Cousin Mel, show him your ticket!

Get off of the fucking train.

The animation for this movie really freaks me out

Here you are, my good man.

...

Got a genuine chuckle out of imagining Hanks saying that.

NO MONEY?!

Of course.
Here you are, my good man.

Uh no. I'd rather live on a deserted island talking to a volleyball than ride this train.

Will there be multi-track drifting?

That was obviously used before

OH WE GOT IT

NOT TODAY GRANDPA

My tax money helped pay for this railroad, I'm riding this goddamn train.

IT'S RIGHT HERE YOU...
YOU...

Hahaaa. I got that joke.

I can see it.
the kids are yucking it up on the train doing stupid kid shit when all of sudden they hear a scream.
little timmy Jr. is waving his arms around and blubbering like an idiot.
"What' wrong?" one of the other dumb kids asks him.
"look outside!" he shouts.
they all press their unsettling CGI faces to the glass and take in the horror around them.

There they are.
Hundreds of them.
Some wearing pajamas.
Some wearing bathrobes.
All of them frozen solid and covered in snow.
The bodies go on for miles along the train tracks.

Then the conductor steps into the carriage and all eyes turn on to him.
"What?"
he says with a shrug.
"They didn't have their tickets"

Oh dear!
How did that get in here?
I must've have the other in my other pocket.
Ah, here we go!

YOU'LL HAVE EVERYTHING YOU NEEEEEEEED

I can't pay for a ticket, because I got no cents.

Make me!

Oh. I am not gonna get off this Train Ride

are we going to meet Kwanzaa-Bot?

THEY SAID

Before I present it, can you assure me that the engineer on this rust bucket won't do 80 mph on a 30 mph corner?

HAMBURGUER PLEASE

it's right here

I appreciate this reference

Will this do?

Can I transfer my ticket to Hogwarts for a North Pole ticket?

there are hatsune miku fans laughing at you

DON'T YOU SAY IT

Ha

Do you think that if the retarded decision of making this uncanny valley CG would have been thrown out in favor of live action this could have been a success?

FUCK, WE MISSED SANTA BECAUSE THIS OLD FUCK WOULDN’T LET US IN!

Why was this guy such an asshole? Isn't he suppose to be part of Santas clause magical christmas staff thing?

...

Who would be responsible if a child died on the train?

>implying a magical train on the northern icecap is effectively someone's jurisdiction
Just dump the body. Either a polar bear will it eat with some coca-cola or it'll float to the shores of Canada, Norway or Russia in a few hundred years once the ice caps melt.

But the parents. Their child just suddenly disappears and is found a few years later in the northern ice caps?

I'm pretty sure they were in attendance.

>found
You can't find anyone there even if you're looking. Who the hell is going to search the North Pole for a child Missing in America? And even if, how do you go from a body in the arctic to Tom Hanks and a magic train? And how the fuck do you find said magic train even if you do?

If that were my kid, I'd might open a few lawsuits against santa or tom hanks himself. Just saying.

presumably, law enforcement may follow the tracks from the body of the deceased to locate possible areas it came from. The body would probably have a good degree of being preserved if left undisturbed in the ice, making it easier to identify. The actual difficulty would be finding the body in the first place -- at minimum they would be reported missing until the body is found. Once they find the body next to railroad tracks they can presume a connection of the train to the murder, though any logs of a magic christmas train plot device would be dubious at best

Legit didn't like this movie.

DOMINOES FALLING!

Pfft, tickets. I hop aboard this rattler anytimes I feels like it.

RIOT IN THE STREETS!

You're a day late my friend.

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