How would you write an alternative origin story for Batman?

How would you write an alternative origin story for Batman?

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en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Life_unworthy_of_life
sys.Sup
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hahaha PEE PEE poopoo

Bob kanes legacy truely is dignified in everyway

This is what happens when you raise kids in the U.S.

>giving your fucking 3yr old an iphone
>hes so stupid he pisses in furnititure
Why is this generation so fucking stupid? We need to extingush all these intellectually deficient “””people””” before they grow up and fuck up society even more
en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Life_unworthy_of_life

peeeeeeeeeee
peeeeeee

>the U.S.
>Bournemouth, England

Bruce Wayne is a bored, rich brat and he gets off on fighting crime

Typical DC fan

>This is what happens when you raise kids in the U.S.
>location is Bournemouth, England

I guess by your logic that makes you American

Did the recent wave of censorship and refugee influx just lower the UKs entire IQ?

OBSESSED

it probably actually has

>not pissing in the drawer
lmao brainlet

>UK
>white children

...

Call me edgy all you want, you know im right. If our generation is as fucking stupid and backwards as it is, imagine a generation raised by millennials, addicted to their phone screens since before they can properly think, and thinking shit like logan paul is actual entertainment

What if batmans origin was him getting caught pee peeing in drawers.

That's a pretty good drawer, I must say. I only own cheap IKEA-tier bullshit that would leak EVERYWHERE.

Is that a fucking capri-sun packet in the drawer? Holy shit, i want to punch that dumb kids puffy face for being so stupid.

OP's childhood photos aside

what is its like that one story where the phantom stranger takes batman to an alternate universe to stop the murder and the kid grows up to be like because he's inspired by batman

but like what about that with no murder in general like how could bruce ever not be something like that he's an obsessive paranoid hyper intelligent guy with too much drive right? not having dead parents wont make him into the playboy louse persona he puts up.

this would create a batman without the personal investment in saving gotham the same way his main continuity counterpart is would bruce become batman out of boredom then or because of a genuine hope he has for improving gotham?

then there's the idea that maybe thomas wayne would see all the telltale signs of mental illness in his son as he develops being that he is a doctor

I don't understand this meme who is this guy?

A faggot e celeb douche that underage retards think is cool. He laughed at a dead body in the japanese suicide forest

Pretty sure that's one of those cheap ass tablets that only have ABCs toddler apps.

I dont care, its still making your child into a phoone addicted zombie. These kids are going to turn into shelterd, no social skills retards because they never had an actual childhood, and were playing the same shitty apps over and over for most of their lives.

>muh anime
>b-but le based nippon
fuck off retard, why not make a vlog on why you don't like he broke the rules you learned in your anime

I didnt even referee to anime you idiotic faggot. I hate him for being a douchey dudbro, im just glad other people are starting to hate him as much as i do now.

...

That pic is my alternative origin story for Batman.

This is what happens when you don't beat your children.

What if Bruce's parents never die but Thomas ends up fucking up the company due to alcoholism and then becomes a mob boss like the penguin and Bruce's motivation is walking in on Thomas torturing and murdering someone in his house when he was a kid

IIRC he didn't actually laugh at it. As soon as they found the dead guy laughter stopped.

>retard eceleb no one would ever think of liking
>does insensitive/racist thing
>Sup Forums bending over backwards, rushing over each other to defend the guy because he pissed off a minority/SJWs
every time.

>Sup Forums bending over backwards, rushing over each other to defend the guy
this hasnt happenned at all? mostly everyone is makingfun of him for being so stupid and because japanwants to put him in jail

I didn't think IQ went into the negatives

What's Logan Paul done that Jackass didn't do 15 years ago? Kids have always been fucking stupid and edgy.

Oh yeah how dare they entertain their kid with games and bright colored sounds and noises.
Instead of the usual baby toys or baby shows of games and bright colored sounds and noises.

What does this post have to do with Batman or a toddler pissing into a drawer??

>OP's pic get posted on /r9k/
>robots sympathizie with the poor kid and rage against the shitty sister who publicly humiliated him forever
>Same pic is posted on Sup Forums
>/comblr/ rages against a 3-year old for not knowing better

Why are liberals such uncaring assholes?

How about some parental interaction more than once every eclipse?
I can’t imagine having a kid and immediately not giving a damn about it.

>Oh yeah how dare they entertain their kid with games and bright colored sounds and noises.
How about something that doesnt stunt their brain development and actully forces parents to interact with their kids.

OP's pic looks like the origin story of a Sup Forums poster.

>m.

Hey wow it's almost like kids are fucking stupid regardless of the era they're in and eventually learn how to mature hmmm who would have fucking thought

Throughout history parents have found a way not to give a shit
Stop acting like this is the only time in history where kids have been fundamentally retarded
It's a given that a kid is going to be irreversibly stupid, until they learn how to not be
Fucking Spartans trained them to be soldiers at the age of seven in an effort to stop them from being kids in the first place, to force them to mature faster

parents used to have 10 kids and only 4 made it to adults, parenting is a modern phenomenon and has stedily been on the decline for 100 years at the very least
we are just returning to how things used to be

The big ass differnece is the guys on jackass constantly told us they were retarded and to not be like them.

Millenials are the laziest parents ever, and yes kids are more fucking stupid now for constantly being on iphones instead of doing other kid related things, and think douchebags like logan paul are good. Stop being a contraian faggot and stick it down your throat.

>US finally annexed England
It's about time.

How? Why would a three years old end up doing this while knowing it's wrong? Weren't his parents supposed to aid him in any case at such an early age?

What the fuck is going on in that house for a kid to develop this kind of behavior?

>Why are liberals such uncaring assholes?
I dont have compassion for retards

Because millennials are horrible parents, and gen z will turn out even more fucked up then the generation obsessed with funko pops and social activism to feel self righteous.

the jackass gang never acted like what they were doing wasn't dumb as fuck, also they didn't fuck with dead people.

>Why would a three years old end up doing this while knowing it's wrong?
Kids do a lot of things if they think they can get away with it. Even animals can lie.

The worst i did as a kid was hide my flintstones vitamins under my bed, and as a result ants infested my bedroom feasting on the remains of a molded barney rubble

>parents
unlikely, you mean mom

u must hate yourself then

I did a lot of dumb shit as a child but not pissing or shitting outside of a toilet was pretty well hammered in by the time I was allowed to just do shit unsupervised.

Speak for yourself user

...

i love retards and i love you

Thinly veiled Sup Forums threads are cancer and against >>>Sup Forumsrules/1
OP is a faggot.
Do your part to help purge subhumans like him from this board by reporting this thread.
sys.Sup Forums.org/co/imgboard.php?mode=report&no=97971012&altc=1

And that compassion for deformed freaks is a weakness plaguing humanity and society more then ever right now

Fuck off police faggot

how is this a Sup Forums thread now???
youarent even trying anymore

>mum
>bournemouth england
>"U.S."
this is what happens when you go to school in britain

>mom found the poop jug

Prove it. Convince me that parents now are lazier. You can't just say something and it becomes true.

Everything that is newer is automatically worse and if you disagree I will just call you underaged

How the fuck can i prove that to you? Its obvious to anyone whos seen a modern parent
>constantly ignore kids
>shoves tablets in their face to avoid caring for them
>let them run around in public without really caring for them
Some dumb black bitch lost her 4 year old son in the mall when i went there on saturday, when the mall security found the kid and gave him to the mother, she didnt even seem phased or thankful and just left with him.

Yes if you were in an earlier time it would be impossible to find a neglecting or abusive parent

Im not even saying that, moron. Im saying that parents are even more neglectful in the present. But i cant prove anything to you, youve already made up your mind that everyone who complains about the modern world is “whining” so you can be an edgy contraian faggot.

And where is the proof other than MUH FEE FEES, you absolute fucking retard?
>you've already made your mind
The fucking irony

Millennials?
What? Generation X is the current adults with kids at the moment.
Or the mid 80s early 90s generation Y adults if they got married by early 20s.

on average, yes. But no it would not have affected the actual IQ of any individual English person. So, this person is just normal stupid.

You remember wrong

>And where is the proof other than MUH FEE FEES
What ive seen is more then feeling you fucking retard. Fuck off you mouth breathing sperglord

>kids learning ABCs by a tablet is stunting their growth
>watching sesame street on a 6in tablet instead of a 20in box tv is stunting their growth

>Like, it's just obvious, dude. I don't have to prove it.
There have always been parents like what you described and they have not become more common.

Yes, refusing to play with physical toys and reading books and playing repetitive apps like angry bird is stunting their growth

or we can go back to the old way where ignoring your kid was to tell them to go outside and not come back in until supper time

nobody ever lost a child that way.........

Prove it

google.com/amp/www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4093670/amp/Millennials-entitled-narcissistic-lazy-s-not-fault-Expert-claims-child-wins-prize-social-media-left-Gen-Y-unable-deal-real-world.html
Not specifcially about parenting but these are the new generation of parents

Aw shit, it's you, you're the same faggot that made that thread the other day sperging out about how a Toy Story 4 wouldn't work because kids these days don't play with toys or some shit. Is it gonna be a recurrent thing for you to autistically shriek like this? Because this is legitimately really fucking funny.

Is he holding a receipt for pissing in the drawer?

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