AND THEN ALONG CAME ZEUS

AND THEN ALONG CAME ZEUS

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To put his dick in it?

BROTHERS!
Titans!

Look at you in your squalid prison!
Who put you down there?!?

JEWSSSS!

And now that I set you free, what is the first thing you are going to do?!?

BOOM-SHAKA-LAKA-LAKA
BOOM-SHAKA-LAKA-LAKA
BOOM BOOM

GET JEWSSSS!

Good...answer?

How did the ancient Romans know that the Earth was in a state of primordial chaos millions of years ago, when they didn't have any real scientific tools yet?

You know considering they were built up as such powerful forces of destruction, the Titans were really easy to permanently beat

Don't you mean Greeks, user?

AND EVERYONE GOT RAPED!

COVER YOUR BUMHOLES LADIES!

I would go most anywhere to find where I BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG!!!

this was his standard operating procedure.

not even joking. every greek myth can be linked back to Zeus sleeping with somebody besides Hera and creating an illegitimate child (usually a demigod, sometimes a monster) from this.

HE TURNED INTO A SWAN

Hercules was Roman.

But Zeus is Greek?

Yeah.

Loads of adaptions of the Heracles myth do this weird thing where they use the Roman name for Heracles, but the Greek names for the gods.

HE HURLED HIS THUNDERBOLT

holy shit, is this OC

>Zeus originally starts fucking around to produce the prophesied champion of the Gigantomachy
>Then it turns out, he just really likes fucking around

Ok I giggled

Zoos doesn't even need to sleep with bitches, he just golden showers them and boom, she's preggo.

Anyone watch this

Too bad the pink pegasus was a trap.

for the longest time i though Genndy Tartakovsky worked on this, but it just happen to have a similar artstyle.
Also those female titans were pretty hot.

Ganymede is best Zeus bitch

Hercules is the roman name of the greek character called heracles.

The fuck am I looking at here?

True, but they make good Kingdom Hearts bosses

>WHO LET OUT A LAUGH
>SAID "I'LL SPLIT THEM RIGHT DOWN THE MIDDLE, GONNA CUT 'EM RIGHT UP IN HALF

fuck you for making me dig this image up.

you think that will work?
>turns into a golden shower and impregnates behind you
Phhh nothing personal, kid...

BY THE WAY ENRIQUE, CHAD'S SLEEPING WITH YOUR WIFE!

LOCKED THOSE NIGGAS IN A VAULT

AND THEN ALONG CAME GANYMEDE

see

you mean only Rock and Ice Titan. Lava and Tornado don't seem feasible other than in a glorified reaction command cutscene.

I think both Lava and Tornado could be interesting bosses. I'm expecting one of them to replace Ice in KH3

>Zeus sleeping with somebody

>implying he only fucked people

This is mostly the result of Greek myth being cobbled together from a thousand different city-states and villages that each had their own mythos. Every little village's chief had some story about how his family was descended from the biggest and strongest of the gods, so when Greek mythology took on a more pan-Hellenic character and something resembling a unified canon started to emerge, Zeus ended up with a shitload of sexual baggage due to all these local versions of him. Hades by contrast never had any extramarital affairs, not because he's such a great guy but because none of the little hamlets that would go on to contribute to Greek myth cared to talk about him that much.

Asshurt Olympian detected. Hades did nothing wrong.

people tend to die like a bitch when their fated to lose to someone

He's not saying he did anything wrong, he's just saying, they didn't care.
Worst Case, Hades is an unpleasant reality people don't like to think about, best case he's just some schmuck who runs the underworld and there's no real point in overdoing tribute because it doesn't change how he acts towards you.

>Hades did nothing wrong.
Correct, that why he's so scary, he has the most evil role but balances that out by minding his business and he gets a cute waifu.
I lied, she looks awful"

...

Just women?

AND THEN ALONG CAME SOOS

ALOOONG CAME JOOONES

youtube.com/watch?v=-yYQ8CwZ1k8

Goddamn it.

And then along came Tonatiuh

youtube.com/watch?v=ITstgdnmp6Y

...

Is Zeus the most alpha God of any pantheon?

Fucks whoever and whatever he wants with no one to stop him because he's so damned powerful.

AND THEN ALONG CAME RA

HE HURLED HIS RICH BLACK HISTORY OF EGYPTIAN CULTURE

STRAIGHT BACK TO NUBIA WHERE IT BELOOOOONGED

Heracles! Heracles! Heracleeeeeeeeeeesss!

*sacrifices your heart*
Heh, nothing personal, kid

...

Nah he was kind of a bitch.
90% of the time he just try to avoid handling his problems.
Despite being the most powerful god he'd constantly shirk responsibility to avoid having to deal with any fallout.

nice trips.

more like a womanizing hack that shirked any responsibility and caused more trouble than he fixed

but then again barring hades and Dionysus the greek gods were generally spiteful assholes

The idea was that if the Titans ambushed Zeus, the only God that could take them down, the rest would fall.

Wasn't Hercules suppose to be their major downfall? It would make sense the thing prophesied to defeat them could do so in such a cakewalk fashion. And Zeus took them down before, him + Hercules powers made them trivial. They are gods after all.

This movie and Hercules inspired a game when I was a kid, where I'd be a giant titan and my living room couch was Mt Olympus. I'd climb to the top of the cushion, and pretend Zeus hit me with a thunderbolt, and I'd let go and fall back onto the couch.

Good times.

>Zeus puts his dick inside everything he can
>Poseidon rapes some random girl in one of his daughters temple

I'd rather stay in Hades, and don't even get me started with the shit Hercules did

>Hercules
HONEY YOU MEAN

Come to think of it did hades ever rape?

Well he did forcibly make Persephone his wife, but besides that, no.

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