Anyone here do prison time? How do you survive without joining a gang and getting butt raped?

Anyone here do prison time? How do you survive without joining a gang and getting butt raped?

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You can't survive jail without penises in your Apple, UT wouldn't be a exclusive secret society without its rituals.

>asshole, it
Sorry, posting from telephone.

Just keep calm and don't start shit.
Don't offer shit and dont try to be anyones friend.
If you find yourself having to do favors, you better follow through. Chances are, if you dont act like a tryhard, everything will be cool.

I assume you're going to jail, user?

Just don't owe anybody anything and mind your own business and you'll be fine. Lay back and figure people out for a few days before you start trying to be anyone's friend. I did 2 years at a federal medium security prison when I was 19.

>how do you not get raped
Scream at them that they should check their male privilege.

The words "Just trying to do my time" will get you out of most problems. Just learn when you have to use them before things get stupid.

What did you do to go to jail?

Been there. Let's start at the beginning:

Before being sentenced you will probably be in a holding cell with some numbers. In the morning they will ask everyone to stand in a circle while the highest ranking number stands in the middle. They will recite a story making his rank official (you won't know wtf), then they will go around asking everyone if they are a number, which you will have to prove by reciting your specific number's story. If you are not part of the numbers, you will be "skud", meaning they will take anything of value from you. Don't fight it or they will kick your ass. After sentencing and you are on your way to proper jail, in the back of the transport van they will throw something to you on the floor, money, smokes, etc and tell you to put it up your ass. If you do you will forever be a bitch mule and will be doing that every time you go to court and back, also your chances of being raped go up considerably. So don't do it. No matter how much pressure they put on you. Even if they threaten violence, don't do it. When you get to jail you will be stripped and asked to jump on your haunches to see if you have anything to hide up there. You'll get your fingerprints etc taken and you go to your cell. When you arrive, do not enter the cell. Stand in the doorway. One rep/high rank member from each number will approach you and ask what you did, starting with the 28s, then 27s, then 26s. If you are really bad guy (rape/murder/assault) either the 28s or 27s will want you in their number. Not recommended. Try and keep it to theft or property destruction so that the 26s will want you. 28s and 27s are fucked up. After each rep has chatted they will discuss and one of them will take you (hope to hell it's the 26s) to your bunk in their corner of the cell. Stick with them as they will kinda guide you in the ways of survival in jail.

I hate it when there are penises in my apples

After you been taken they will skud you again but at least it is your group as most things are shared in your number. You are not a number yet so they will usually take half your food and any other luxuries. Try and get them to make you a "frans" as soon as possible. This means you are affiliated with your number but not an official number member.Soon as you are a fransyou get to keep your food and some luxuries here and there.Becoming a frans means you learn the introduction part of the story of the 26s, learn it well because you will be asked to recite it if you are a frans here and there. Being frans means are under the number's protection as well, meaning if a 27 or 28 wants something from you they will have to clear it with your group's captain/general or whatever. So well done, you shouldn't get raped, unless you go for a shower alone. Go with your number's guys. Avoid contact with the 27s and 28s as much as possible. Follow your 26 captain's instructions and you should be fine. I cannot stress how important the little story is. If you don't know it you will be taken advantage of so get it down asap. Just follow the routine and keep your head down and you should be fine. Never fight. Never struggle, just let your captain sort everything out. But again you have to know your little story. One plus of being a frans is that when you get out, if anyone wants to rob you or something you can tell them you are affiliated with your number and most will straight up leave you alone, but some will take half of what you have, which is considered fair, and leave you alone. This is pretty much all you would need to know to not get raped and have a horrible experience in jail, as if being in jail isn't horrible enough. You can go further in the gang if you wish usually but I've found, and most other inmates will agree, being rans is sufficient. Unless you want to get involved with some serious ilegal shizzle. Btw you will get a lot of job offers, specially if you are white.

>The words "Just trying to do my time" will get you out of most problems
How?
I imagine that's what everyone else is in there fore

Also dont accept favors

It's what you tell people when they ask you to do things for them. Everyone will ask, that's how you reply.

I did three years in western penitentiary in Pittsburgh
>didn't join a gang
>didn't get raped
>worked out
>played pinochle
>watched cable in my cell on my flat screen
The prison meme is bullshit

Hacked ATMs. Stole 260k (allegedly), ended up getting 37 months in jail. Had to go to a medium security prison because I was only 19. Ended up doing 2 years 2 months and 3 days there, then 6 months at the half-way house and the rest way taken off for good time. After that I had to do 3 years of probation, but they let me loose after 2 years.

Also, get some earplugs. Earplugs and books. It's very loud and very boring.

Someone get the dick apple pictures flowing

This. But when you get there, the church will usually give you a little bag with a stick of deoderant, some snacks, etc, to hold you over until your property comes in.

I was an autist and spent 3 minutes or so politely refusing the bag because I read not to take anything that people offer you.

if you did that you were in a fed joint
did you enjoy your satellite radio?

You don't necessarily have to join Aryan Brotherhood, but in CA you are expected to be with the "woods", that is, whites.

I don't know how other states are but

>niggers are niggers. do not use their phones, toilets, or share food with them. Avoid their area completely
>beaners are practically running an army, whites are their fleas since whites are completely outnumbered
>if a spic cuts in front, let it happen unless you never seen em before and they're new

Honestly though, jail isn't that bad if you're white. It's mostly just reading.

did you get the "Bob Baker" brand prison stuff
>the price is right guy made prison deodorant

Safetest way to do prison time is take the faith and keep to yourself. When inmates recognize you as a man of god they will most likely leave you alone.

West coast Pecker woods?
my cellie was in the east coat pecker woods

Yeah, my case went federal. It was a joint task force that arrested me though.

We don't have satellite radio, but when during my last year we were starting to get mp3 players. They were a rip-off really. Songs were $1.00-2.00 each and the damn mp3 players were 80 dollars and only seemed to last 6 months before something broke on them. I never messed with them because I didn't have enough time left.

Yeah, that bob barker soap is no joke, it'll damn near eat your skin off. The underwear were the worst though.

>Stole 260k (allegedly)
Did you keep cash?

How did you get caught allegedly?

Dick Apple on request

>not enjoying butt sex

faggot

ok yeah you were there awhile ago then
I got out of state in 12 I knew guys in the feds
Trust me dud I know about the bob baker shit I did a decent amount of time in PA

You guys can find the rest

niggers are usually on Sup Forums and not here

The CO's in my prison got in trouble for sending a snitch in to fuck with a child molester
He ended up Dalmering him
>Dick apple is no big deal

The cash has been gone for a while. I split it 50/50 with my partner, a few weeks before he turned me in and helped the feds set up a sting on me.

Partner had a big mouth, bragged to the wrong person, got pinched, then turned on me.

What about pledging insanity or some shit? Does it help in the states?

I´m officially recognized as "schizo" by past dealings with mental institution and police, last time I ended up vandalizing a shop, eating their food at the store when I had ran out of money (extreme nigger behavior, I know)
Police arrived and they drove me straight to mental hospital, I never went even through court proceedings. Just spent 1 month there resting and eating and ended up getting even money from the government. Mental health units still have some fucked up rules around here that you are not allowed to leave the place not even once a day, so you have to spend from 4 days to one week practically in isolation without even right to get fresh air, but then you "gain" rights after that one week and can even leave the place to go shopping if you want to.

SUCH IS LIFE IN FINLAND

canadian prison is super comfy

What the hell is Dalmering?

Plunger handle up your ass till your dead

Look up Jeffrey Dalmer

When you get your fingers cut off and eaten and the guy that did it becomes a Meme

This
Mind your own business. Of someone tries to punk you then you have to do something about it though. Its all about apperance. Don't get involved in prison politics. DO NOT JOIN A GANG. Work out, meet cool people, and find a job (not working in the field). Most of all find someone to write to and put money on your books. Kept me sane.

t. Five years in TDCJ

Also if you did something that people are going to beat you ass over then you need to destroy all your court documents and change your story quick.

The mp3 players had a built-in radio, maybe they were talking about those. I forget the brand of mp3 player they were - its the tiny one Sup Forums has a fetish for. But it has a special chip that requires you to sync it with their computers every two weeks or it bricks.

That's one thing I hated about the feds, they protected the hell out of chomos. A buddy of mine did two weeks in the hole for calling one out in the chow hall. He didn't even touch him, just told the chomo to get the hell away from him.

Robbie?

jeffrey dahmer
I spelled it wrong but who gives a fuck

If you plead insanity, you just have to do your time in a mental health unit instead of the prison. I don't know about state prisons, but the federal mental health unit at Butner is a hell-hole filled with weirdos.

So just beaten up? Why not just say beaten up then? I don't get why that action is attributed to that guy in particular. A lot of people have been beaten to death in prison.

OP you also dont talk about why you're there, or for how much time. People who are doing large swaths of time will get mad or take it as boasting if you're not in for as long.

Just give consent then it won't be rape, would be just consensual gay sex.

Prison rape doesn't happen in first world countries.

Here your just riot until you get pizza.

heraldsun.com.au/news/law-order/riots-continue-at-parkville-youth-justice-centre-in-melbourne/news-story/57ec5c0b5176e3c2d39632208b1766d0

>american prisons
>first world

Is it like trailer park boys?

nope
Yeah I heard you needed it to watch TV
They started protecting the Chets/Chomos/touchers in PA state prison too but that don't stop us
>Be me Child Molester comes on the block he has no paperwork to show us he isn't
>Cool ass CO says he'll get the info after his vacation
>Week goes by he is back on the block
>comes up to our card table
>That guy is back on a violation he raped his 11 year old twins
>got caught with 10,000 images of child porn on his PC
>Ok fellas I gotta go take these trays over to I block I'll be back in 15 don't do anything because the cameras are still broke
>Shit went real bad for the child molester... there was blood

I was in a max for 4 years. I had co who'd bring in an ounce of weed and molly roughly twice a month. Sold it rather cheap. The boys inside take care of their dealer.

I heard if you get a lot of groceries / "commissary" you become a target. Everyone wants a piece of your honeybuns which is apparently and ironically a currency in American jails .

he wasn't beaten up see
he dead

I maxed my commissary orders out every week
>no one ever bother me
but I'm 6'3" 225lbs and worked out and my cellie was in the Aryans so
plus I had my own racket in there getting things in through visits

>tfw want to go to prison and be the protected wifey of the strongest alpha

I´ve been to the worst of the worst mental health unit for adults in my country and I gotta say that even though the place is not that bad with all the routines of institution, the hardest part was keeping your sanity with all the crazies.

Lots of fucked up people, time-travellers, ufo-sight seeing, government conspiracy stuff. Shadow people and all sorts of fucking Illuminati bullshit. All the patients extremely suspicious of each other because fucking Voodoo and shit.

The pills you have to take are the worst part, they literally zombify you beyond anything you can imagine. As soon as I got out there I had to ditch all of them, but I was probably on 6 different medications ranging from benzos to various neurolepts

fucking Norway
>Norway wants to be a punk
not surprised
do you want a black husband or a white one?

Yeah, the TVs are lined up on a wall in the common area and each TV has a different FM frequency you tune into for the sound. It's a pretty good system except for Sundays when the niggers are chipping out over football.

The federal system is pretty fucked when it comes to chomos. They are filling up so fast with them that they are actually enough of them to build little cliques within the unit. When I left, my unit of 160 had 15 chomos.

Each place is different with what they use as currency. In the federal system, it's mostly stamps and bagged mackeral (macs). Two stamps or one mac equal a dollar worth of commissary.

white pls

Follow this example:

>On August 14 Donaldson was one of 66 demonstrators (including Daniel Berrigan) who took part in a CCNV-sponsored pray-in at the White House protesting the bombing of Cambodia, where he was again arrested.[18][19] Donaldson again refused to post bail. In a 1974 account under the pseudonym Donald Tucker, he explained:

>"I also was protesting against the bail system, under which the privileged, the white, the middle class escape the pre-trial confinements which go automatically to the poor and black. In good conscience I could not take advantage of the privileges available to me.

>Even in jail, however, I could not escape those privileges. I was sent directly to cell block four, third floor — the privileged area where I could and did play chess with Gordon Liddy, where one-man rooms for 45 respectable prisoners were never locked."

>Liddy wrote in his autobiography that he heard that Donaldson worked for The Washington Post and, suspected him of being in prison "to try to steal a march[(?)]" on Woodward and Bernstein by getting a first hand story", and expressed the wish that he be transferred elsewhere.[20]

>That night, Donaldson was lured into a cell by a prisoner who claimed that he and his friends wanted to 'discuss pacifism' with him in their cells. He was then anally and orally raped dozens of times by an estimated 45 male inmates. He suffered additional abuse a second night before he escaped from his tormentors (two of whom were pimping him to the others for cigarettes) and collapsed, sobbing, at the cell block gate where guards retrieved him. After a midnight examination at D.C. General Hospital (during which he remained handcuffed) he was returned to the jail hospital, untreated either for physical injury or emotional trauma

post girlcock plox

I'm just an ordinary queer.

Ugh, fag.

I was about the same way. I'm 6'2 205lbs so I was big enough to hurt someone in a fight. I was young and green at the time, so the older guys showed me the ropes.

I ended up working to unload the trucks for the kitchen, so I had a little racket there. During my free time, I stayed in the law library fighting legal cases for people.

>The next day (August 24) Donaldson held a press conference,[23] becoming the first male prison-rape survivor to publicly recount his experiences;[21] this resulted in "massive and prolonged" publicity (under his legal name, Robert Martin).[18] All three Washington newspapers carried lengthy stories; newspapers from Hartford to Miami picked it up from wire services, and all three network-affiliated TV stations carried filmed interviews. Donaldson wrote the following year about this "time of agony":

>"I was faced with an awful decision: to cooperate in the prosecution of the two young inmates who had led the rapes, to bring suit against the Corrections Department, or to drop out of the legal process.

>The prospect of giving my assailants a still longer prison term went contrary to [my deep convictions]. Yet many who were working to change the penal system felt that the first prosecution of a prison rape case would set a significant precedent and have a real deterrent effect on such situations in the future.

>Bill Schaffer was advising me that the civil suit would be considerably handicapped if I did not go through with prosecution of the inmates. He was confident of winning such a suit, but warned me that the government would probably defend itself outside the court by launching a smear campaign in the press against me and those close to me....

>Torn between my rigid principles and my private pain, I spent weeks in hell trying to come to a decision.[18]"

>After deliberations with the Langley Hill Meeting, Donaldson decided on October 20 not to file a civil suit and to not cooperate with the grand jury inquiry into a criminal suit against his attackers

yeah they have special blocks for them were in the system I was in they were mainly the rapists
You got the ones doing the online or crossing state lines in the feds
>plus human traffickers
We had TVs in our cells if you could afford them of commissary 19inc RCAs
Plus we had cable for $17 a month and the would bring movies in and play them on the prison's channel
>you get porn late at night at times or Skin-a-max type shit
You'd have better luck finding a black one, they use to say "Gay for the stay, straight at the gates"
There are so man gay nigger thugs it's unreal

Damn that sounds pretty rough.

My cellie tried to play crazy when he first got arrested, but the US Attorney knew better, so they put him in the mental unit. They had him butt naked in a cold room with only a steel frame bed to sleep on. He held out for 3 months before they finally broke him.

Ahaha, you are fucked my friend. hahah Dont worry you'll find a lot of friends there, everybody needs friends if you know what I mean. They will tell you about everything and everyone. You will have a good time.
You can prepare your anus from now. Buttsex doesn't feel good only at the beginning then you will like it, also it's better to you to learn how to suck dick, google deepthroat.
And also google how to make a bradawl sitting in a fucking empty sell having nothing - this will be very useful.

Im confused by the numbers thing. Where were you in prison? How many natives are there?

I did 6 weeks in a California County Jail. It's day care for grown men. I did almost get jumped for using the black showers on my 2nd day there. I told them I was new and they told me where I'm allowed. After that every nigger that almost beat me up asked me if I was ok every day. Otherwise I just watched baseball and did push ups. We punked the CO's and everybody on my floor hit the emergency button in the same 10 minute stretch because they wouldn't let us out of our cells that day

yeah I was in my mid 20's when I made it to the state system but by the time I got there I knew the ropes from the county prisons I was in. That's what
>being a heroin addict
>being good with computers
got me, I had a credit card racket but the never got me on it
I ended up getting my dick knocked in the dirt for selling 6 fucking suboxone to a snitch. Out of all the shit I did that got me and the made an example of me
I'm clean now and have my shit together, good job etc...
Laid off right now
>union construction

>first time in jail
>mostly white inmates
>had a great time, read a lot of books, exercised, enjoyed routine, made good friends
>fermented wine under my mattress with another inmate
>went to Bible study

>go to jail again recently for a few weeks
>different area, not predominantly white
>fucking miserable time
>couple other inmates at my bunk snorting butthole coke, literally cocaine that smells like ass since one shat it out their ass
>asked if i want a line
>no fucking thank you, im going to bed

fucking disgusting

This is your best option OP.

I heard they like boypussy in prison

County jail is a joke. Prison and jail are two different things. Sounds like a fun time tho.

>They had him butt naked in a cold room with only a steel frame bed to sleep on. He held out for 3 months before they finally broke him.

Ha the US is fucked. This is why I like it when cops are killed.

Thats how it was when I got arrest in the middle of PA
>almost all white
>no snitches
>very respectable
Getting arrested in Pittsburgh is 20% white junkies 75% niggers 5% spic ICE detainees

Prison is almost the streets in PA
it's also much more violent depending on the facility

why did you go to jail to begin with? let alone two times

Thing that bothered me the most in state prison
>seeing white Muslims
I fucking hate the fucks

>personal tvs

That sounds pretty comfy. We had 6 tvs for everyone in the unit. 2 were sports, 2 were spanish, one was black, and the other was white. There was always some political bullshit about what show to watch and where you could place your chair. Most of the time, I just didn't fuck with it.

Damn, it sounds like you had quite a ride. I'm about done with all the crime stuff too. I can't get into everything because I don't want to dox myself (again) or admit to anything within the statute of limitations.

When I got out, it was impossible for anything other than temp labor jobs. I ended up starting my own company doing contract labor jobs. I started out with just me doing the all the work and I've slowly grown it over the past few years. Employers will do tons of background checks before they hire an employee, but virtually nothing before they hire an independent contractor.

If thats the one I think it is, it has some pretty nice basketball courts.

Nah place was a shit
>Western Penitentiary
>oldest prison in the country

Yea well I was on the "supervision" before I got my "papers" and diagnosis so to speak, this was the first time. 5 days in a isolation room, small room with only mattress and food was inserted through the door. Shit and piss in a bucket.

Most of the guards/nurses/psychologists all asked me the question "How the fuck you spend time in here"
I´m totally fine at looking empty walls, no books, no music, nothing. I have no problem to waste time looking at empty walls, I´m totally contempt if I get some fucking free food and warm room I´ve lived in real life even shittier conditions. Don´t need any other "refreshments" even though I do respect certain liberties

Yeah, being a CO and having the kind of people over people really fucks some of them up in the head. I don't know if that kind of works attracts masochists or creates them, maybe a bit of both.

Sounds pretty rough. Are you doing better now?

>LARPing this hard

Depends on how much time you get honestly.

If you get a couple of years or less you can keep to yourself, don't break any of the code and keep your butt cherry in tact. BUT... if you get more time than that? Or if you start breaking code or showing yourself to be a punk... you are going to eventually get bent over a table and taken... even IF you join a gang it will eventually happen.. just a part of the welcoming committee if you are a screw up..

resisted arrest when black out drunk

second time was due to having a warrant for some past issue i still dont fully understand. whatever the case, i accepted their deal so i could just get the fuck out. wasn't worth fighting.

yeah man it's hard
I detailed cars until I could save up to get one and get my union card back
Luckily they take felons and I make $36 an hour
the fuck you if you get locked up even if you get your life back on track like you and I have it's still have to get a job in anything but manual laborer
I went to school for computer science
oh well
>gladiator school was better mad me a man unlike these kids in college now

nope he is legit
I did state time knew guys in the feds everything he said is 10o0% about the feds
I'll even give you part of my state ID
>KG56**

If only the nig nogs were like you.

Yea I´m doing better and got my life now somehow sorted out. I´m still afraid I end up in the streets in the future because I have very little respect/common sense for myself and spent many nights in alcoholic anonymous shelters and other hobo shelters etc.

Now I live with a relative and waiting to get my driver´s license back (DIY from last year) so I can get back to work.

The thing is that after you´ve been to institutions, or spent too much time there, you start to view them as some kind of shelter places or "home" so to speak, I gotta say that when my life has been to shittiest I really dream of getting back to the fucking institution or even prison because at least you get fucking food over there. Kinda like second home or some last resort

This is stupid talk, but happens in those times when you cant get your life sorted out.

I wish I was LARPing. I really screwed up my life pretty early on. I didn't mind the prison time or probation, but seeing the disappointment in my family's face when they found out was probably the hardest thing I've ever had to go through.

Federal inmate numbers are set up like this: xxxxx - XXX. The first part just goes in sequential order based on when you were sentenced, but the last three are the district you were sentenced in. I was arrested about 700 miles from home, so I always had a completely different last 3 than everyone else.

>tfw I make over $20/hr less than a criminal

he's going to prison, not county jail..

bobbarker.com/

What the hell? I had no idea.

Just ask to go in the protective custody wing. Its comfy, lots of middle aged white pedos who keep to themselves.

funny isn't it
I wish I was LARPing too I'd be making 100k a or more a year and not have wasted 3 years of my life
But honestly if you can survive prison you can survive anything
People make it out to be more than it is in terms of violence and rape but the monotony of it just destroys your spirit