Mfw Sup Forums agrees with this

>mfw Sup Forums agrees with this
>mfw Sup Forums believes jesus would be a capitalist republican NRA xenophobic redneck

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youtu.be/isxvXITTLLY
biblehub.com/john/2-15.htm
youtube.com/watch?v=BXWvKDSwvls
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

Hurr hurr i like to suck nigger cock, islam is peace and hillary already won.
P. S. Fuck drumpf and fuck white people

He'd do none of those things, he's a cuck.

>Son of the literal God
>Get shanked by a piss poor auxiliary and die

a contemporary jesus would probably be some kind of populist talk radio jew cult leader

Legitimate defense can be not only a right but a grave duty for one who is responsible for the lives of others. The defense of the common good requires that an unjust aggressor be rendered unable to cause harm. For this reason, those who legitimately hold authority also have the right to use arms to repel aggressors against the civil community entrusted to their responsibility.

CCC 2265

youtu.be/isxvXITTLLY

Jesus was a commie and burgers will never accept this.

He would not say either. He would demand that we from then on say happy birthday.

Bullshit, he'd be an edgy, autistic vegan hipster who goes around complaining about anything and everything, and eventually would get shot by niggers.

Then when medical science, he would crack the shits at the massive bill, claim it was all whiteys fault, then go and Jill himself cause everyone, everywhere calls him out for being the massive Cuck he is.

>support the Police
Was killed and persecuted by the police for loitering.

*when medical science saves him

commies are atheists you dumb faggot and they don't profess hierarchical social structures
jesus created a cult of personality to position himself as the king of the jews

He wss killed by the jews for challenging the establishment

>forgave them

Jesus wouldnt own a gun, also

>jesus existed

t. meme history

Jesus said "Those who live by the sword, shall die by the sword"
Which in todays age would mean gun
So, no. He wouldn't own a gun or approve of them.

Matthew 5:9
>Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.

Romans 13:4
>For he is God's servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword in vain. For he is the servant of God, an avenger who carries out God's wrath on the wrongdoer.

Proverbs 28:1
>The wicked flee when no man pursueth: but the righteous are bold as a lion.

someone plz post the picture of NRA jesus

Jesus would be a commie, you christians are cucked to the jews

>Jesus would support...
>MLK would support...
>Reagan would support...

Fucking enough of this halo effect bullshit already

Above everything, a cuck.

>a cuck
>raised by a bigger cuck
>a literal "my wife's son"

He's not totally incorrect

>He said to them, “But now if you have a purse, take it, and also a bag; and if you don’t have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one.” Luke 22:36

And

>Matthew 22:21 Jesus said "Render to Caesar the things that are Caesar's; and to God the things that are God's."

the bible also says that nobody could live like jesus did

I agree

but he did whip shit skins in the face and flip tables at them

There is a big diffrence between being charitable and state sponsered extortion

if Jesus would be back among us he'd be a pacifist cuck but it wouldn't matter because he's the son of God and the same rules that apply to me and you don't apply to him.

He literally whipped a bunch of shit skins in the face in broad daylight public

...

I don't recall such passage

Feel free to enlighten me

He would definitely own a gun, but as an anarchist he wouldn't support the police. He would of course oppose wrong doings against police as persons

>He'd say "Merry Christmas" not "Happy Holidays."
Well he'd probably say "Edo bri'cho o rish d'shato brich'to"

John 2:15

>jesus would be a law-abiding good goy

Did this dude even read the gospels? How the fuck do you get that interpretation of Jesus?

Jesus message was pretty clear: abandon all your earthly possessions, because the end is nigh and I will lead you to the kingdom of my father. Spread my message until you get killed for it and you will be rewarded in heaven

Wasn't hard to get tbqh senpai

Jesus probably wouldn't personally have a gun. Omniscience means you can avoid any situation where you might need one. The rest of the tweet is mostly accurate, although I should point out that support and criticism are not mutually exclusive.

>live by the sword, die by the sword

it's like you don't want to go to valhalla

Matthew 21:12

He went into the temple, saw a bunch of money lenders. Flipped his shit and chased them out with whips.

Luke 22:36
He said to them, "But now if you have a purse, take it, and also a bag; and if you don't have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one.

jesus argued against the pharisees. He was an outsider that popular judaism despised because he preached an alternate view.

And just where did Our Lord urge people to seize the means of production?

Jesus was more of a "turn the other cheek" and "shake the dust off your feet" kind of guy, there was no compulsion in Christianity, even the wealth-sharing disciples did so voluntarily, which was an extraordinary thing to do.

They didn't care about material possessions because they saw the risen Christ and were absolutely certain of the Truth.

This right here.

Stop being (((Christian))). It's an ancient Jewish proto-psyop to make Europeans worship poverty and weakness.

>if jesus was back
>if
>IF IF IF IF IFIFI-I-I-I-I-IF IFI-IFIFIFI FIIF OKIE DOKE

You forgot he would drive those fucking ((banksters)) out with a whip

Doesn't say anything about Jesus whipping people in the face

Doesn't say anything about whipping my christcuck friend. Turning over tables and driving them out could be a metaphor.

>Joe Walsh
Life's been good to him so far....

okay, lets metaphorically drive em out then

Jesus Christ was a communist though.

For once, Vargy-boo is right.

...

This reply to that is far more realistic

>If Jesus was back among us, he'd be getting stopped and frisked, and told to go back to Palestine with the other terrorists

Though they should probably add something about communism to that knowing republicans

This is fake right? Jesus would never own a gun, he can call down lightning onto your ass if he desires. He also wouldn't care what you call a holiday

Joe Walsh was cool when he was in the Eagles

biblehub.com/john/2-15.htm

How ever you want to interpret it pacifist cucks don't turn over tables and kick faggots out like a bouncer.

cont.
for the record don't believe in Jesus

Wouldnt jesus say happy birthday?

John 2:15

>So he made a whip out of cords, and drove all from the temple courts, both sheep and cattle; he scattered the coins of the money changers and overturned their tables.

>xenophobic

There's that word again

He literally told his followers to carry swords. Which they used to protect him when the Pharisees came to arrest him until he told them to stand down.

Jesus would say "Happy birthday to me" sometime in the spring every year. He wouldn't celebrate his birthday on a different day just because some kids made a religion about him that was practiced by 40% of the world for 2000 years after his death.

Also, he was a Jew anyways. He wouldn't even celebrate a Christian holiday. He would probably feel flattered though.

/thread

He'd absolutely say merry Christmas. I doubt he'd support gun ownership or the police. He was both anti-establishment and against violence.

>Also, he was a Jew anyways. He wouldn't even celebrate a Christian holiday.
Are you fucking retarded or is this bait?

Imagine how Joseph felt every birthday Jesus had. >God damn i'm such a cuck...

>anti-establishment
>Be subject for the Lord's sake to every human institution, whether it be to the emperor as supreme, or to governors as sent by him to punish those who do evil and to praise those who do good. For this is the will of God, that by doing good you should put to silence the ignorance of foolish people. Live as people who are free, not using your freedom as a cover-up for evil, but living as servants of God. Honor everyone. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the emperor.

Honestly, I'd picture Jesus more as something similar to a Vietnam war era hippie. Probably minus the drugs though. He'd just travel around dropping wisdom on people and being mostly ignored or shunned because of his lifestyle/appearance. He wouldn't have a gun but I'd doubt him being anti-gun. He'd probably support the police or at least see the value of the service they provide. I also doubt he would acknowledge a day that celebrates his birth, he'd probably be more weirded out than anything that we buy each other shit we don't need and watch cartoons about a fat man that flies around.

You make a valid point. I stand corrected.

Jesus was jewish. Christianity is a religion about him. He was never a christian during his lifetime.

Jesus could conjure food from sand and achieve post-scarcity

youtube.com/watch?v=BXWvKDSwvls

raising the savior of mankind,being rich and having a qt virgin wife wouldn't have been that bad
also jesus was never a jew he was a Judean

>it's this shit argument again

I don't think if Jesus wanted to defend himself he'd use a gun or something.
He'd probably use force lightning or some shit.

> there are people in this world that think Jesus would be a capitalist republican NRA xenophobic redneck if he were alive today

How can people be this fucking stupid?