ITT: You wake up in Amish country

What do Sup Forums?

Leave.

>Have a nice country breakfast
>Leave

Fixed.

I'd hop in my car and leave

Reminder, there is absolutely ZERO degeneracy and young couples have to sleep with a board between them while they discuss having children and owning a horse.

Yeah, it means you're not getting laid whatsoever.

Coffee + cigarette, then dress and look around.

>you will never bend a qt Amish girl over the board and ream her to the cows come home while she bites her lip to keep from crying out in pleasure so as not to wake her parents in the next room over

Finally get to take a shit in an outhouse away from talking people in or near restrooms.

Whats so taboo about owning a horse?

AmishBoard.. works every time

>having loving sexual relations with your partner is degenerate
>cuddling is degenerate

I mean I'm pretty on board with the whole conservative sexuality thing but holy fuck, if I love a lady I'm going to lay pipe in her every chance I get.

>reverse search
>all images are from this site

fugg

Finding a comfy place to order some scrapple.

>Eat all of their winter food

Finish all of my chores and party like it's 1699

you absolute madman

they just are finishing pickling and jarring at this very moment

I would have her get on her knees and bend her ass right to the edge and ram my dick in.

Use their wi-fi to watch porn.

You would condemn them to death, you fool!

Nice reference

I'd probably wake up at 4:30 in the morning milking cows

Knock on a door and ask if they have space for a farmhand, seeing as I seem to have misplaced my house and country.

leave

>you will never churn butter with a qt Amish girl and then enjoy some freshly baked buttered bread

Get changed.
Pick up a hammer.
Do a decent days work.
Enjoy a hearty dinner.
Get comfy and settle in for the night.

Repeat x 10,000.

>qt Almish girl
You've found yourself a Pole there, friendo.

Thank them for being based.

beg the town smithy for employment
beg the town tailor / dressmaker for employment
beg the town baker for employment

>Be the most conservative and non-degenerate people to exist
>Are a joke to people
>Helped save America and the West
They're alright by me

Allready there.

>lay a pipe
I don't get these plumber jokes.

I would actually be very concerned. How did I end up there and how do I go home?

Do hard work and prove my worth to the town's leader and marry his daughter?
yes

Be comfy

why not just having two separate rooms?

Look for my immortal green haired 2D qt3.14.

Too bad Amish have weird traditions, I bet they'd be pretty sucessful if they dropped the whole religious bullshitery and focused on being comfy without technology.
>sleep
>work
>spend time with family and/or community
>repeat
Obviously social pressure is always going to be strong in those communities but having an anti-fun religion really isn't helping them

Drive around in my Dodge Charger

Run over Amish midgets

Rape the girls in the bakery

Shit on their meeting house

I didn't know they voted

Jump in the lake.

i go to the amish every spring for the best fucking peaches on the planet. their produce is the best shit. you drive out there and everything is corn or soy field depending on the year. every family seems to have their own silo that you use to identify where the fuck your destination is going to be. once you get there they have all the amish dudes outside and all the women are inside selling shit fast. yes amish girls are hot. fucking hell are they hot. you give them your money and they don't even look at you in the eye, it's really crazy. i don't know if they're taught to not look guys in the eyes but they just look down and take your money. maybe i'm just an ugly cunt trying to fuck amish teenagers of age. but seriously, they have some good shit there. their cheese sucks though, tastes like pure fucking ass.

Pray, do 2 hours of farm work such as cow milking, pray, eat well earned daily breakfest at 6 am, pray, work more doing furniture, or farm work, carrgie repair, pray, eat, pray study bible, enjoy well earned time with the bros, go home to my 10/10 clean white pussy and depoist my future child. pray and thank god for the best most fullfiling life ever, have the best sleep of my life from a days worth of godly toil, wonder how anyone could ever enjoy working in a office on a computer for 8 hours a day, wake up the happiest man in the world the next day and repeat

>not buying their produce and baked sweets

It's like you fuckers don't want to eat good food

i'll add that i'm in central indiana. you go southeast and it's literally all fucking amish going through the ohio border into cincinnati and east through wheeling to pittsburgh. the amish are fucking everywhere around here. amish mecca on the planet

you known the butter churners/milk maids must give the best handjobs

Kill myself becasue I'd be an american.

Spnd the day shitposting on Sup Forums

it's the menninates that generallly don't vote

I grew up in Illinois. There are a bunch of Amish near where I lived. If I woke up in their area, I'd get a great free breakfast then head on home after buying some apple butter from one of their roadside shops. Apple butter is fucking awesome!

>10/10 clean white pussy
>10/10
>Clean
I wouldn't be so sure

...because discussing children and horse ownership is probably a long conversation? How many kids? What color horse?

French cucks wouldn't know anything about clean white pussy. All the shit skins have fucked your bitches into submission.

Those shoes are ruining their outfits

>Most of the Amish continue to have 6–7 children while benefiting from the major decrease in infant and maternal mortality in the 20th century. Between 1992 and 2013, the Amish population increased by 120%,[8] while the US population increased by only 23%
how do I join????

I'd be more dubious over a modern day french woman's cleanliness than an amish woman's

hitch a ride on one of their carts when they go in to town, thank the man and his son for the ride, then call a cab.

I wake up in Amish country every day anyways.

Holmes county reporting in