/TTT/ - Tuvalu Takeover Thread

>Average IQ of 65
>Not self-sustaining (i.e. has to import food despite being surrounded be rich fishing waters)
>Only claim to fame and source of real income is the stupid .tv domain name
>Can't afford barges so they literally dump their trash and feces into the ocean.
>Little to no infrastructure
>Stirs the shit with major world powers like China and Russia because they're so insignificant they don't fear retaliation (e.g. they condemned Russia's annexation of Crimea).
>Tuvaluan are trying to get refugee status in the west as "Climate Refugees", in order to ruin our society.

12/12/2016 was the day Sup Forums declared war on their pathetic nation.

Old thread

Other urls found in this thread:

.com/Tuvalu-Confessions-281540455298951/
.com/TuvalusHottest/
tuvalu.prism.spc.int
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Walker_(filibuster)
twitter.com/AnonBabble

first for communication blackout

bump

First for greater Sup Forumsand

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I'M DREAMING OF A WHITE NATION

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Have they responded yet? We need to call the head of state.

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Tuvalu only has landline phones and satellite internet
we block communications, kill the population and concoct our own narrative by the time somebody sends a ship to check up months later
then the 200 or so of us bring over a bunch of white mail order brides and furiously repopulate to create a true AutismoState

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Really hoping this isn't just another "what if". Not holding my breath.

I hate Tuvalu as much as the next user, but do we really want to take over an entire country? What would the international community think?

Someone will need to make a new thread later. Ivan out.

"Presidents" twitter

Forgot pic

Also all newcomers keep in mind it only has 10k people
we would only need about 200 armed good men

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>The other historic mammals connected with Tuvalu are in the sea as dolphins and whales are present in the waters surrounding the islands. These waters are also filled with thousands of fish, shellfish, and other forms of sea life. In these waters you can find surgeonfish, clownfish, sailfish, puffer fish, butterfly fish, grouper, barracuda, tuna, mackerel, marlin, mahi-mahi, shrimp, krill, crab, seahorses, manta rays, sharks, jellyfish, starfish, sea urchins, and coral among many others.

I foresee great deal of fishing

this
then annex another island and repeat

Inform him of the deceleration of war and the deceleration of independance

Praise and witness Kek invictus. Check these digits

Oh yeah great fucking plan. Surely the US Pacific Fleets won't interfere when it gets word that a bunch of autists are holocausting the native population

you and me both man. I'd be down for this once I'm done with school (AAS to be sysadmin). Also good luck in the army, I did 4 years navy.

Considering your entire plan is posted here, i don't think having fake propaganda will even work

Sup Forums will rule the waves

>Deceleration

>you may have an entire island filled with Sup Forumsacks who you fish with all day
I know why I live

Richfag here. If you guys are serious about this then appoint a figurehead I can donate to for the cause. I ask for a figurehead meaning someone who doesnt mind openly sharing their identity and promoting this (because if they run off with our money at least we can find them). I have $300 I am willing to throw in right now if someone is up for being the ambassador of Sup Forums.

You have 2 days to set someone in charge or you can call this wet dream a "what if Sup Forums had an island" fantasy. Get serious and make this happen or stop shitting up the damn board. Someone step up right now.

holy fuck please read the thread before your leaf shitposting

Let's all adopt Jewish names and pretend to convert. No one will do anything or ever discuss our genocidal behavior if we do that.

Which ship?

> 100 adventurous autists trigger the entire UN and US Navy
Ain't it some shit?

Put Facebook between dots
.com/Tuvalu-Confessions-281540455298951/
.com/TuvalusHottest/

I'll be Goldberg Shekelstein then

Being this new to the thread

Can't we pick an uninhabited island? There are plenty uninhabited islands with maybe like 5 people

Kek is ITCHING FOR WAR

mortimer silverblat

>Sup Forums declares war

I can support this. If we're honest this was always the final destination. I don't even know where the target is though so I hope you provide maps.

I was on the USS denver for 2 years and then the USS carl vinson.

deck seaman on the first one and OS on the second.

fuck you and fuck your 300 shekels you judas
Sup Forums nation will make new currency, and it will not be debt backed


what would happen if Sup Forums nation declared neutral status, similiar to Switzerland, to confuse the fuck out of plebeians around the world?

Pussy

Kek wills this

No.
We need slaves and they have houses already built, which means the hardest work will be done for us.

It's easier to rebuild an economy with poor infrastructure and use the population as labor.

shadilay burger brother

Do they actually have lines though? Maybe in between the islands, but it doesn't seem plausible for them to extend it to mainland.

Tempting but boat means 'break out another thousand'. $300 doesn't cover a month's moorage for my ketch.

afterwards can we give them helicopter rides?

So are we sending stormtroopers to that Island or fucking what?

No, it's already decided. Those who do not take on the NatSoc work ethic go to labor camps

>estimated population of 10,600
Sup Forums has more regular posters than they have fucking people

We can raid the neighbouring islands for slaves and capture fishing boats, easy to cover up people dissapear there all the fucking time from storms n shiet

it's confirmed

>There is also a substantial presence of other trees and plants, including orchids, hibiscus, eucalyptus, frangipani, ferns, mosses, mahogany trees, mangrove trees, and pandanus trees.
>mahogany
with a little initiative, those could be used to produce high quality, high prize furnitures and very thin wood which achieves good prizes worldwide, but that would either require great deal of tech, for which we do not have patents, or grorious nippon steel katanas

Don't they have something protecting them?

no the short battle, the immediate killing of the population and the rebuilding by our own hands will make us strong, purify us and prove us worthy of inheritance.
no slaves, no native labour.
the work will be all White all Us so that we dont make the same mistake of decadence the rest of our race has fallen to

The U.K.

The US Navy but w/e

We must let them know that they are under attack and in a state of war. They will pressure their government to surrender.

we are peaceful refugees seeking shelter on their island

after tuvalu, epstein's island is next right?

Nonsense. Give me 20 good men.

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some raw data:
Name: Tuvalu
Independence: October 1, 1978
Capital: Funafuti
Currency: Tuvaluan Dollar & Australian Dollar
Population: 10,698 (2013 estimate)
Ethnicity: Polynesian
Language: Tuvaluan & English
Religion: Church of Tuvalu (Christian)

I'm sure we could find a few anons who are good at carpentry.

Invasion plan for Vaitupu.

1st step: Take the farms and cut of acces to the northern jungle by taking the crossroads north of the town.
2nd step: Move the north invasion force further down south pushing through any possible resistance, and thusly occupying the northern small houses of the town. The southern invasion force proceeds to the crossroads to the church where a small detatchment is sent to secure the church.
3rd step: The northern invasion force pushes down south into the center of the town while the southern invasion force proceeds to make retreat impossible from the cities south side.

r8 my invasion plan of Vaitupu aka. "Sup Forumss landing."

What should we rename it to once we take over?

tuvalu.prism.spc.int

Relevant

>Capital: Funfetti

>Tfw my image is thread image

>independance
that means they are not part of the U.K
TIDF BTFO

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Walker_(filibuster)
walker conquered Nicaragua which had a actual military and wasn't isolated with 60 men and around 100 natives he picked up so this is plausible.

but it may be hard for 20 men to kill 10k once the battle is over and the cleansing begins

You cant invade a nation without funding you imbecile. I know my $300 isnt much but I would gladly give all I have if someone proved this to be a true conquest and not another fantasy. I would gladly leave my comfortable life here since I have no family or friends other than my father. I know he would not join me but he would be happy his son financed the creation of a new nation he can be proud of. So unless you want me spending all my cash on an economy here that I haven't supported almost a decade now since my first day of redpilling then please I ask you or anyone else to make this cause legitamate. Free me from this prison I call America and give me someone I can finance to make this happen. I want this, you want this, so be brave about it and make it happen. Somebody lead us god damn you.

Ok so we can feasibly do this if we get organized. What about the international community?

>yfw UN bans Sup Forums for attempting to take over this shitty insignifcant island

The Sup Forumsynisian islands

Sup Forumsand

NEVER FORGET THE MOST SACRED DOCUMENT

>The Deceleration of Independance - signed by Sup Forums 13/12/2016

>thousand
It probably around $20-30k mate, for anything that could handle an actual fight.

I vote that we should secure the capital first, and then move onto the rest of the island once the government is in our control.

It's a shit plan they will see us coming and call in support, we need to infiltrate before the attack begins as tourists or someshit proceed to destroy communications then attack at night and hit the main administrative centres and assassinate anyone who's awake. Then round up the population send them to the Church and burn the fucking thing

Barron Island

Forgot pic. Here is the official Declaration of War that has since been dubbed our "Deceleration of Independence"

sooo what's our current goal

I'm still laughing

Rolling again for this

lol you idiots. thinking you can just take land from the queen.

>Tuvalu user has yet to show his face to defend his country.

As expected.

don't fund yet man, at the moment it is a pipe dream but give it some time. At the moment, the money will be wasted.

>"The westerners are coming to import us into their countries! I can see their ships coming over the horizon! I CAN SEE THEIR FLAG! I CAN SEE THEIR FLAG! GET YOUR GIBS FACES ON!"
>"HOW DOES THEIR FLAG LOOK!? DOES IT SCREAM SAFETY!?"
>"YES I THINK! IT LOOKS LIKE IT HAS A WINDMILL OF FRIENDSHIP ON IT!"

Absolutely comfy.

Yeah sure but that is my proposed plan for Vaiputu.
No need to take it first.

not everyone is here yet
wait till the Aussies hear about it

Don't forget our anthem : the Deplorables
Our motto : Behead those who insult Kek
Our money : the bitcoins
And our legal system : the NAP

The "International Community" couldnt even get its shit together in consensus over the bosnian crisis
the US had to basically yolo it with nato

I highly doubt they will even notice this assuming we alter the narrative enough much less divert the resources to literally nowhere to stop it once its already done

Meant to say legitimate*. Sorry I am exhausted right now but my point still stands that we need a face for this conquest unlesd some anonymous "leader" runs off with our resources.

>TIDF

Sup Forumsony

tuvaluans are stupid just like indonesians and malaysian