>laying puking in the snow for 30 minutes from sudden food poisoning, too weak to get up >Stacy and her dog jog by >dog stops to lick my face and seems concerned about my well-being >ask for water >Stacy keeps jogging, tells her dog to come along >dog doesn't move, looks at me then looks at Stacy, then lets out a woof >Stacy says "here boy" >runs after Stacy >I ask for water again >dog looks back, Stacy doesn't
why are women so fucking heartless? A god damn DOG was more concerned about me than another human being.
Gavin Howard
Hope you feel better.
Isaac Howard
Probably should have taken the week-old vienna sausages out of your pockets, or at least given one to the hungry pupper.
Easton Jenkins
Dog is man's best friend, the vaginakike is just a scam.
Dylan Thomas
>you're entitled to other people's time
Zachary Hall
>In Birds of Paradise it’s always the bright, glittering, fluttering, posing male that grabs our attention whereas the female plumage is typically drab to blend in with their environment. (Women have a natural tendency to lean towards herd mentality, equality, comfort and sameness)
>The males do the showing-off and females do the choosing. Females demanded more and more of their mates, egging them on to greater evolutionary heights of rainbow colour, impossibly proportioned ornaments and razzle-dazzle displays. (Men innovate, explore, invent, take risk and hereby build civilisation just to increase their chances of reproduction)
>A long-term field study in the 1980s found that female Lawes's Parotias visited displaying males up to six weeks before and up to six weeks after mating. Extreme female choice indeed. (Men's expendability leads to female hypergamy as women realise they have the upper hand and so lure multiple men with sexual intimacy each time with the sole purpose of increasing the amount of resources they can extract from them before their fertility runs out)
Jack Lopez
>When a female with such a preference chooses a male with a showy trait, their offspring inherit both the showy trait and the preference, reinforcing the pattern. (Women continually breed with r-selected, low IQ, highly attractive males reproducing the pattern of low-investment, low-commitment sexual behaviour onto the next generation)
>Many male birds-of-paradise will never get the chance to mate. This is why female choice is so powerful. Individual choices by females tend to converge on a handful of males—the ones perceived to be the most attractive. (Men who try to break free from this cycle of exploitation begin uncovering too much information about female behaviour and other politically inconvenient truths which will only increase their distance from societal norms which will decrease their chances of reproduction even further.)
>As a consequence, those few males father most of the offspring. (80% of women are taken by 20% of men)
Michael Cook
The dog wanted to stop to eat your puke.
Henry Perez
She could literally smell your weak beta genetics. Seriously what kind of pussy collapses in the street from food poisoning? Do you get the vapors too?
Gavin Carter
this, doggos LOVE eating puke
Josiah Walker
There's a reason why catfags will hang on the day of the rope
Grayson Moore
You gross freak, you raped the poor woman by existing near her
Austin Fisher
it just makes me so happy that people have finally stopped pretending cats are anything more than smelly pests
dogs are a best
Benjamin Johnson
I don't find this story hard to believe at all, in fact I'm certain that this actually happened and I know that OP is not a faggot
Noah Price
You take that back.
Luke Kelly
>uses words like stacy. Back to r9k, autismo. Woman + Dogs > dogs > women
Adrian Diaz
...
Carter Green
Underrated
Justin Stewart
>lay puking in the snow for 30 minutes from sudden food poisoning from out of date collectors edition MLP candy, too weak to get up as i'm overweight and and arms are wobbling. >Stacy and her dog jog by >Dog stops to lick my face of the vomit dripping from my double chin and neckbeard, not concerned for me at all and just doing what a dog does. >ask for water, stuttering as I sob due to the vomit making my eyes water. >Stacy winces, frowning and telling her dog to come along and stop being gross. >dog doesn't move, too busy eating the vomit from my skewed-glasses face and lets off a woof at the feast. >stacy says "here boy!" >runs after stacy >I ask for water again, looking up as drool runs from my chin, and vomit leaks from my nose as I weakly put my fedora back on. >dog looks back for seconds, stacy doesn't
Fixed.
Ryan Reed
>humans are birds
James Gray
>I don't know what evolution is burgers
Easton Stewart
Funniest thing I've read all day
Evan Richardson
what other shit you got copypasted that you don't understand? come on, i wanna hear it
Elijah Evans
>doesn't know we're descended from T-Rexes just like birds Kys this retards
Dylan Butler
>food-poisoning fucking drunk
Aiden Brooks
Also, the joke to this pathetic OP is that food poisoning isn't instant. You can feel it coming from a mile off be it in stomach aches, gurgling intestines or possibly wet farts.
As soon as you get any signs, even including sweating and a fever, fucking bunker up in a toilet with a bottle of water, fast.
You have no excuse to let this shit happen if it's real.