Rate this on a scale of 0 to HERESY

Rate this on a scale of 0 to HERESY.

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that's just magical thinking at its finest

desu he would be a stormtrooper extraordinaire

>Child soldier

Kek, the left doesn't even pretend to have integrity anymore. It's funny.

Yeah wh couldn't the kid let the poor robbers take all his shit? The obviously needed it more. Why didn't he question his childhood sexuality and let them fuck him in the ass? That's what good liberal would do.

Who would win? Kevin or ISIS?

The thing that gets on my nerves the most about Home Alone is when Keven puts aftershave on his face and acts like it burns.

hmmm, makes u think

even trump makes a cameo in the movie

and it's a white kid toying with two liberal criminals

wtf i hate being home alone now

Home Alone is the true patrician christmas movie

You a dumdum? He's putting on aftershave, and when his hands meet his cheek, it looks like he's screaming minus the open mouth. So he completes it by screaming with an open mouth. You know, like on the cover of the DVDs.

>child soldier
This is just fucking hilarious

Vice has done about three different anti Home Alone articles in the last week or so. Tying it to some liberal garbage.

What are they trying to do here?

>When I doubt

HERESY

>Micheal Jackson, the jews and hollywood liberals fucking him in the wallet and his boi pussy that made him into a crack addicted skeleton.

No the joke is that he puts it on and it burns. But aftershave doesn't burn unless you've cut or damaged the skin in some way while shaving. It burns because it disinfects cuts. He didn't shave so it wouldn't have burned him.

are you autistic? he's just imitating adults

the subtle nod to german expressionism clearly went over your head. home alone is high art consumed by plebs who don't know any better.

You're wrong, buddy. He's just going through the motions of screaming. Making the caricature of fear. This whole movie is about Kevin conquering fear.

movie didnt go far enough
criminals were white

Well fuck mr toughsmccallousface it doesn't feel real good, does it? Freshly shaved, sensitive face meets watered down rubbing alcohol yeah nah no wonder a kid, being more sensitive to pain because of his age, might think it burns and scream. That's like the most iconic part of the movie.

He's intimidating adults by putting on aftershave. He just thinks that if you're a man you splash this shit on your face so he does it. And then it ends up burning him. That's the joke. He's not intimidating an adult by screaming. Men don't scream or act out when aftershave burns.

>the left is one person

trump is in home alone 2

>aftershave doesn't burn unless you've cut or damaged the skin in some way while shaving
Put some on your scrotum and tell me how it feels.

I like that movie

My nuts are in an aftershave bath right now, and it feels FANTASTIC

I went back and watched the scene on YouTube and he doesn't shave. He says all the things he did and he doesn't mention shaving.

That's fine, I get it. But it still shouldn't burn him. There isn't any indication in the scene that he's faking.

Wait until you try Bengay.

Really? I thought it was clear he was faking it. Didn't seem like a genuine scream to me.

>HAHA, some more fun fake shit to laugh at-
>Look it up
>It's real
>It's not April fools day

intimidating? go find a new school, kiddo

>implying leftists aren't a hivemind

this thread is trash
MODS
SAGE

Isn't he a little short?

Best Christmas movies:
Die Hard
Home alone
A Christmas story
Elf
>and others that are older that I haven't ever seen.

Daniel Stern character was identified as a jew in the sequel. Joe Pesci is a gentile, but he's also a hook-nosed spaghetti nigger.

Kevin's family were upper middle-class WASPS.

Home Alone was basically a child from a traditional Norman Rockwell family defending himself against two swarthy thieves.

Who would he be imitating? Men don't do that.

They're just mad because of the Donald Trump cameo.

>blonde haired blue eyed Aryan outsmarts an abuses a Jew and a spaghetti nigger manlet over and over

At last I truly see.

How? This thread is completely topical. Merry Christmas.

He's just pretending to be afraid. Again, alluding to the theme of conquering fear and "growing up".

I feel like journalists are running out of shit to write about.

How about Lethal Weapon faggot?

Just accept the movie has flaws.

This. Move is GOAT. Very few token niggers, too. A very hwhite film. And Kevin defending his home with a bb gun is funny. Just imagine if it was a youth shotgun or .22lr.

You're having a good time at the Christmas party when this kid walks up and eats all the cheese pizza. What do?

It has atrocious acting, which definitely lends to our different interpretations of that scene.

>home intrusion
>shitcago suburb
>two middle aged white men

Maybe when the left stops trying to coerce preschoolers to be transgender they can talk about "child soldiers".

He steals a toothbrush and enjoys the thought of his family having "disappeared" off of the Earth. Pretty degenerate imho.

Underrated

>making a family movie about a kid trying to scare off retarded burglars is ""right-wing""

>notice Trump has a 10 second cameo in the 2nd (?) film
>literally shaking
>make article to bash the whole series

Trump guest stars in one of the movies. They are trying to slander the films by association.

They just hate McCauley Culkin cuz hes red pilled

Interestingly enough, it could be argued that Kevin HAD to booby-trap his home, since the entire film took place in Winnetka, which had a handgun ban at the time. Was John Hughes trying to make an anti-gun control statement? He WAS a conservative Republican according to PJ O'Rourke, so it's possible.

Try bengay then get in the shower ;)

I appreciated this. Others didn't but I did.

Too bad Acey ain't in charge no more.

Where is gremlins?

And yet they won't #BoycottNewYork

This is somehow even more ridiculous than The Onion's take on the film.

youtube.com/watch?v=WllmUTgi5Tg

>>two middle aged white men

One of them was jewish, and the goy was the "brains" of the operation.

i never even noticed when i was a kid, and i watched those movies a lot

This movie plus original red dawn told every kid in America that they aren't just helpless, passive victims. Based.

Somewhere in White Americana today, a White boy received his future school shooting gun.

Lol I guess he should have been a good progressive and allowed the two criminals to rape and murder him. After all, if you defend yourself against your enemies, they win.

>Try bengay then get in the shower ;)
I'm beginning to think George Michael isn't really dead.

>mfw I just looked up Macaulay Culkin
Christ, he looks like shit. Poor bastard. Those jewlywood pedo rings must have broken him.

blast him with piss

Die Hard is not a Christmas movie.

Gremlins is not a Christmas movie, either.

"Let it know"

loving the subtlety here

Down the wall and to the left

A Christmas Story is a Jewish movie mocking Christmas and the goyim.

>Die Hard is not a Christmas movie.
oh yes it is you fucking nigger
>gremlins
gremlins 2 is the christmas one isn't it?

Reboot where the kid gets raped by two Syrian refugees who broke into his house, and then afterwards writing a letter to the UN at the end of the movie where he explains his whiteness put the refugees in this horrible position to begin with and sometimes we just have to bite the bullet and increase refugee welfare WHEN??

Also he'll decide to transition as sequel-bait.

7/7

>gremlins 2 is the christmas one isn't it?

No it's the first one. Opening scene:

youtube.com/watch?v=Kzv2Ha_mMnQ

Clever girl...

perfect height tbqh, jedi can't block their crotches

Why do you say that? Jean Shepherd and the director, Bob Clark, are both white.

Interesting fact: Bob Clark was killed by an illegal Mexican.

Takes place in small town wrecked by factory closing.... All about Asian monsters that make machinery not work. Prescient

>kids used what he has on hand to defend his home from thieves after he was left alone
>RIGHT WING PROPAGANDA

Kekd

So are we getting a re-make where Kevin uses his "please don't burgle my home" bracelet to ward off the invaders

Literally the whole reason Bruce Willis' character is there for the events of Die Hard is because he's buying his kid Christmas presents. The move takes place on Christmas Eve.

bump

hilarious/10

He's kind of right in a way. Home Alone is a redpilled survivalist destroying Jew Yorkers. It's basically the family friendly version of Rambo.

Here go the Liberals telling me I cant defend my home with a firearm from robbers even if it is a child at home all alone....FUCK YOU NANNY STATE ASSHOLES.

How much time does he have to prepare?

Kek

robbing someone's home is actually keynesian economics in play

if someone takes your things away, then you'll then spend your money to re-buy them

>The Alt right is one person and also literally Hitler.
>Implying pol isn't a hive mind

depends, how much prep time does kevin get?

HERESY

>film is basically about a white homeowner using violence to defend their property from thieves

I wonder why liberals would hate this...

I think this is meant to seem ridiculous, based on context. It just sounds sensible to me.