So I'm staying at Trump's hotel by the white house

I'm staying at Trump's newly opened hotel by the white house, you know, the one he's always talking about.

Rich relatives brought me here. I am a Sup Forums user, so naturally I'm sharing a room with my mom. I have 2 days here and I can afford to spend 100 dollars.

I have no car. Unfortunately this area is mostly populated by the federal government, and there's really not a lot going on, especially for poor people.

There is an Asian guy working at the desk. I made a joke about the wine being expensive and I think it really offended him, I should have known better. That's pretty much everything that's happened so far... Anyway, what do I do? How does a disgusting serf like me take maximum advantage of this--being blessed by fate to tread the sacred ground of perhaps the most high-profile of the God Emperor's commercial developments.

Just to clarify, I didn't mean to insult Trump's wine--it was only a joke but--anyway the Asian guy, he took it real personal and, I just want this to be a good experience and I feel like it's already been cast under a dark auspice by my autism... Forgive me, Donald, I was arrogant.

I'm going to go walk around outside, I'll check this thread later to see if anyone replied. If anything amazing happens I'll make another thread, but it probably won't.

I feel... guilt. Guilt for defiling this realm with my presence.

post photo of keycard

>things to do
Take photos of the grandiose decorations

are you moving there?

to DC i mean

Sup Forums is not your fucking blog.

>I'm staying at Trump's newly opened hotel by the white house

SO jelly right now

I decided not to go outside
I can take questions about the decor

What do I do about the Asian guy?

Fuck the Asian guy, why would he get offended from you mentioning the wine is overpriced? Dont mind him, and if he brings it up, smack him down

>I feel... guilt. Guilt for defiling this realm with my presence.
Hell this is more interesting than most of the bullshit here these days.

Also, take the tour of the clock towers.

Hit the Benjamin Bar if you are 21.

The Asian dude. Probably just miscommunication, forget about it, its meaningless.

I wish, I'm just participating in the revels of my wealthy family members.
Yes it is

It has Trump quotes on the keycards. Different ones. Everything is a shrine to Donald Trump. A lot of things have his quotes on them

Buy him a bottle of that wine. Say something along the lines of "is worth paying my hard earned bangers for this bottle of the god emperors elixir."

Order room service and tip well. If you only get a sandwich you can afford to just hand the guy a $20 and feel like a big shot. Put it on the room if you can.

Post a pic of the room service menu?

With the remaining $80, visit the bar a few times.

>I am a Sup Forums user, so naturally I'm sharing a room with my mom

Kek thanks for being honest

>I feel... guilt. Guilt for defiling this realm with my presence.
Stop it. You are just as worthy as anyone to be there. Money does not make people better. Just enjoy. And screw the desk clerk. If he can't take a joke, or be polite to a guest, that is his problem. His job is to be helpful, polite, and kind to all the guests at the hotel. Your comment was not inappropriate so don't let it bother you again.

Pics of lobby please.

No professional in the hospitality industry should make a guest feel uncomfortable. That kid should be fired.

And what you should do is go down to the Library of Congress. Get a reader's card, and hang out in the stacks for a few hours. That can be pretty fun. The whole time you're there, think that the Congressional Research Service will soon be working for Trump.

Then visit the Capitol. They basically strip search you so don't bring anything. Walk the halls. Go in the tunnels like you own the place; no one will stop you this time of year. Walk around, thinking that this soon will also be Trump's.

And if you want to see a bunch of protesting crazies, go to the White House. Past the homeless and the disaffected lies the run-down hovel of a structure that even Mrs. Obama didn't want to live in. It's still symbolic, so think also, this will be his.

Then go to Arlington. The wreaths are still on the graves. It's quite moving.

Don't miss Air and Space. Also be careful, since DC after dark outside of tourist areas is flat-out dangerous.

I stayed there during the summer. I had a paki bellboy and the fucker looked at me sideways when I didn't tip him.

I asked him to get me a BLT and a pint as if to say I'll tip you when you get back, he got back all happy and shit, I took the tray and closed the door in his face.

Deus Vult.

Then throw the fucking bottle at the cunt. You have more right to be there than him.

RARE PEPE

Go to Comet Pizza and order a Haitain Special

I am 21, the thing is the house wine there is 25 dollars a glass. I will most likely hit it by sitting in the lounge nearby. Fuck the asian guy

this is a picture of a bookmark with a donald trump quote on it. It depicts a distant figure playing golf who may or may not be Donald Trump

>as if to say I'll tip you when you get back, he got back all happy and shit,

That's literally America 24/7 every square inch.

It's like when the hobbits ask about second breakfast. Americans ask about second payment every time.

Any pics of your mom?

Find Ivanka and post a pic with her.

I just realized that your parents could have booked you the ever so slightly smaller suite and given you a few grand to play around with.

y tho.

>, and there's really not a lot going on, especially for poor people

Theres nothing to do in the land of free museums? Did you not do ten seconds of research ? No wonder youre a failure .

Dont pay 25 for a glass of wine bro. Get buzzed on something else

Do you wear your maga hat?

Sup Forums MEET UP
OLD POST OFFICE
A/K/A
TRUMP'S NEW HOTEL

WHEN, user?
ONCE IN A LIFETIME OPPORTUNITY
WE CAN TAKE OVER THE BAR
SINCE PRAISES OF TRUMP
and probably get kicked out, but still
Sup Forums MEET UP

*sing

Order a hooker. DC has some of the best escorts in the country.

pic related
cant get pics of lobby rn because im taking these on my laptop webcam. I'll ask my mom to email me one off her phone lol. It's amazing, the whole lobby is a huge lounge that incorporates the bar area. the chairs are designed to look like thrones.

ty for these suggestions, might hit the captiol, def will go see protesters. kind of intrigued by the street danger, since this is the climax of my life anyway

brutal
:(

we can praise kek!

DC was very boring, was there 2 years ago.
Other than the space museum and the memorials there's no much to do.
Is a dead city, they even have a fucking chinatown and it's full of nigs.

>I'll ask my mom to email me one off her phone lol.
Cool, thanks. The lobby sounds very nice. Thanks for the description.

this is severe autism folks

I forgot it at home but I brought a ziploc bag of campaign pins, I don't know why
this is what I was afraid would happen. you're gonna get me arrested. but to my knowledge, the lobby is open to the public... if you are a bar patron...

no
they dont like giving me free money, only occasional expensive things that don't quite work out, such as this trip

It would be so sweet walking around Trump hotel in one of those robes and a MAGA hat right in the heart of the beast.

Signing off for now, thanks for the suggestions. Will try to avoid the streets at night, but I also thought of going to Chinatown in the middle of the night. Probably shouldn't.

I will check out the capitol and the white house for sure, library of congress is an interesting idea.

One more pic, view from my window.

I will check this thread later, also I will make a new one if I get like, better pics or if I get stabbed by african americans, or if anything else of interest happens.

Feel free to use this thread to plan your bar meetup, but if something happens I will be viewed as the ringleader, so try and... idk.

No wait I will post one more pic before I go, of the bathroom.

>I am a Sup Forums user, so naturally I'm sharing a room with my mom.

>calling the wine expensive

that is the ULTIMATE faux pas, OP. Your action will almost certainly be documented and your bloodline will be blacklisted from high society for all of eternity. Grats.

Library of Congress is closed today, so go late on Wednesday. No one will be there, and there may even be some holiday parties going on. Tuesday they close early.

Don't miss Arlington. It's a perfect time of year and the weather is cooperating. Gates open early, on the metro.

If you want to see a dramatic change, and are up for it, go get on the blue line toward Largo. Fucking depressing.

To see The Sights, though, take the same blue line toward Springfield. You'll go past the monuments and ANC (Arlington National Cemetery).

For some guaranteed danger though, go to Gallaudet (red line). The place is surrounded by the hood.

I'd hit Union Station as well. There are always interesting things to see when people travel, the station itself is certainly historic, and you'll have plenty of homeless trying to rip you off.

...

>heart of the beast
lmao. I dont know if they want you to walk around the public areas of the hotel in a robe, but in theory, it is possible.

oh wait I can get a pic of the lobby from the balcony hold up

Have fun, user.

t. jealous local

I fucking knew it dude. thanks for being real with me

Hit a dive and pick up a slag you autist

>666
James Alefantis?????????????

Fuck you're in one of the corner rooms. What are those 20 foot ceilings? sigh

honestly I would write a mediocre yelp review and cite your low rating to to the chink being offended over your true comment

Damned I didn't even check myself.

user WILL HAVE FUN IN DC
I AM A JEALOUS LOCAL

PRAISE

lets face it im not leaving. dinner in 45 anyway. got a lobby pic

...

Wow. Just got chills, since I remember the building when it was just stores. That's one nice tree. I'm almost afraid to ask but. . .is it a real tree?

And you could just walk around a little bit and be back in time. Up and down Pennsylvania Avenue this time of day will be fine.

there's a spiral staircase in the corner leading to a hatch in the ceiling. normally I would investigate, but if I fuck up in this place I'll probably get on the no fly list or something

hot with the gets DCbro. yeah I will go stroll around after dinner on Pennsylvania ave. Probably I will die if I go out at actual night though, right?

It's probably closed off. They wanted to keep a lot of the architectural elements (and that was part of the deal since the building is historic). And shame on them if it did lead somewhere and they didn't lock it before opening it to the public.

Also realize your new (temporary) status. You're a guest in one of the more expensive hotels around. You're not to be trifled with, because you're rich. You can talk your way out of damned near anything, because no one wants bad publicity.

Go for it. Once in a lifetime.

There's so much security these days you won't die. This is the land of Big Brother, insane-level security. No one expects privacy, particularly electronic. So no if you stick to Pennsylvania Avenue you'll be fine. If you go to Capitol Heights it could be RIP user, but even then as a Trump Hotel guest you'd make the news.

>TRUMP HOTEL GUEST
>ASSAULTED BY FERALS

>I am a Sup Forums user, so naturally I'm sharing a room with my mom.

I'll go touch the tree and see if it's real. brb
I would never do anything to defy Donald Trump... I'm seeing it more as a lifelong personal vendetta with the Asian guy, sort of a count of monte cristo type deal where I'll become wealthy and come back to destroy his life and reduce him to a broken man

DO IT CUNT

>kind of intrigued by the street danger,

Even if you don't do them, go buy drugs off the street.

Thank you. Will be monitoring during cocktail hour.

run into a secret service security/marksman team ....

And checked you too. Blessed thread.

Walk around 15th and Penn.
Dont worry, its close.

Look for bald monk in orange karate gi.

He will offer you beads.

Let him put them of you.

Report back.

I have relatives like that.
Just play along their game, never let them know differently and how you feel about money. Luckily they will think you're cool and let go a little more.

ask to see a manager, complain to him aabout the chinaman, maybe youll get free shit

Where? How? it's a special occasion after all. haha im gonna die

The tree is false. there is a black lady in front of it with a cart of fine cheeses, serving them to a middle eastern couple. there is a donation box in front of it for Eric Trump's charity, asking that you donate if you take a picture with the tree. there is also a black lady that pushes the elevator button for you. most of the servants are black, except for my nemesis.

Intrigued. going to do this... not questioning it

I checked the spiral staircase, there was once a hatch at the top but it's been fully closed off, it's just a ceiling. but I approached it with mischievous intent, so I did good right?

Go play ping pong and have a few brewskis at Comet Pizza, It's got great Yelp reviews apparently.

the way they do the bar and the lounge, there are these carts with booze and like, fine cheeses and stuff, and I'm not sure how you get the stuff off of them, well an attendant gives it to you, but I don't know how they charge you for it. maybe it's complimentary but only if they offer it to you. I don't know. the plot thickens.

Gonna head to dinner now, will check back afterward. I can probably get away for a bit in the evening, so I'll let you guys know if I end up buying crack from a monk, or something. If thread is archived I'll make a new one, if anything interesting happens.

I don't want to get the "funny tasting chicken" so I'll probably stay away from there...

Just caught this post, ty congressman. Will check out Union Station for sure.

Eat cheap food. Lincoln waffle shop near ford's theater, or walk to the DC wharf. Plus all the museums and memorials are free you poor nigger.

>fake tree
>soliciting funds

I'll let it go because it's Trump. But otherwise. . .

Walk around the memorials at night. They light up. I go there almost every day and read the quotes engraved for inspiration.

Walk down Embassy Row and see all the RARE FLAGS.

Go to the Spy Museum, or whatever museum you are interested in. there are a lot.

Take the metro to Arlington and visit the National Cemetery.

stay away from SE. Really dangerous place.

also you can get a pass to visit the senate and house and actually watch them in action voting on things. It's like you're in C-span.

FUCK I want to go to a Trump hotel

There's barely any books in the library of Congress for casual readers. If you want access to the millions you have to request that shit. Otherwise, not much to do.