ARE YOU ?

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DESIGNATED

do not give the shitskins more reason to not poo in loo

If you don't have a squatty potty, just kill yourself.

youtube.com/watch?v=YbYWhdLO43Q

Shitskins are the masters of poo, surely their way must be the ultimate way.

if you got Hroids you have to squat (and plus if you are really screwed down there), unless you love bleeding

Were the poos right all along?

Only if you wish to become poo itself

dude I tried the "natural" way once and bled like a fucking pint of blood I shit you not I thought I was gonna die or something, I called my gf and her father is a doctor, he said it wasn't dangerous to bleed while you shit, as long as the blood is fresh

i have a little stool so im half-sitting half-squatting. p nice

also

POO

What if I just get that rubberband in my gut removed? I should be able to poop perfectly and comfortably them.

is that how you appease the toilet witches?

This is the correct way to shit

You will shit like you never have shit before if you master the Asiatic squat.

That's not even true.

source: med student

SHITTING

>Med Student
>Leaf

Quit trying to fit in and poo the way humanity intended, rajeed.

I say go for it and

SUPERIOR SHITTING ANGLE

>squat on toilet seat
>shit lands on back of seat
>"shit"
>lose balance
>ass lands in shit

You squat over the toilet then shit your fucking pants?

>cracks the porcelain

I'd like to try the squat shit but I'd probably fall off the toilet.

Wouldn't sitting down like the "Unnatural Squatting" while lying forward so your torso in on your lap be the same as the "natural squatting"

Disciprine, etc

t. Amerifat

This is some Indian propaganda. Trying to normalize squatting to shit to give validity to their designated not toilet shiting areas. I won't fall for it Poos!

if thats how shitworlders actually want to shit, why not just have a floor basin like in stop putting your goddamn shoes on the toilet seat

I keep a stool in front of my toilet so I'm at least halfway there, right?

GET IN HERE CUNTS, ONE AUSSIE FIGHTS OFF 8 MUSLIMS AT ONCE!!

COPS ARE CHARGING HIM WITH RACISM!

Have squatted once and can confirm

t. fatass amerisharts
please exercise, fellow americans
and don't try this if you're a fat fuck, you actually will break the toilet. they sell stools that go around the toilet for you to squat on

That's what I do too. Nice little stool to rest your feet on. My shits fly right out of my ass, very little wiping except on bad days.

10/10 would recommend to friends

ITT an actual benefit to multiculturalism

I've been pooping with my feet up for almost 2 years now. Life is great!

>squat on seat
>seat breaks and you rip your own balls off

people have died this way

Yes, but you need to take a shit, not do yoga

well that can be due to a number of reasons, but basically if you are healthy you shouldnt need to push a single bit, the opposite, you relax and do your business in a minute. 1st stool must be soft, if it isnt you are constipated, work on ways to keep it soft every day. 2nd you must relax your muscles no need to push, imagine giving birth, instead of pushing just breathe deep so theres more internal pressure, you should be at a point where you dont need to push and keep pushing to do anything, instead the opposite, you breathe in and if you pushed too much you stop, slowing down a bit and letting gravity do the job.

Also you wont die right away, but the area gets more and more scarred and then you only get worse. Then you get fevers while you have a wound going, constant pain, may develop psych issues like absolute fear of going shit (due to pain) (and that only makes it worse due to getting constipated due to not shitting), risk of blockade, eventually rectal cancer.

Doctors see so much crap none will care unless you are about to die. He means dark blood (black) is an emergency since it means internal bleeding (like you intestines got punctured, ulcers broke, whatever), youd notice earlier though, as youd be bleeding out for a while.

You don't even have to do a full on squat. Just elevate your feet a bit, sit them on something.

The only way you're pooping wrong is if you get it all over yourself.

Anything other than that is perfectly fine.

If I am having trouble I tuck my legs towards my chest or put them on a trash bin (if there is one) instead of just continuing to push.

My shit usually comes out pretty smoothly though.

>relax and do your business in a minute

Feels good man

did you buy the stool from Amazon? Sounds like you are writing a review for them! lol

>not using your poop as fertilizer

wtf i hate poo in the loo now

I'm not going to stand on my fucking toilet like some squatting slav ape.

i never realized you could fuck up shitting

today i learned pol is literally too dumb to shit themselves

I remember I had a severe case of concipation when I was a kid. One of my Pajeets Neighbours, who a family Friend, suggested to my mother that I squat when I shit instead of sitting down, for atleast a month. It worked, and I had great bowl movement afterwards. Although it did take time to retrain my shitting reflexes.

>tfw can't squat

if the toilet resists your fat ass it has proven it can resist your weight, just dont focus it all on a single point

sort of, but its not the right angle overall, you also want gravity to help you from the beginning, not the final centimeter

asians do have floor toilets, westerners dont, so long as you dont step on the plastic seat, and clean afterward i dont see the issue

good one

This is like the blue and gold dress meme. Only women squat. If you squat on floor or on western toilets your balls go everywhere and everything tightens up. You end up 8 feet off the ground. Durr le standing shitting masterrace

Can replicate the squat you sit normally but just lean forward so that your torso is parallel to your legs?

not the poster youre replying to (im the poster he replied to) but i made mine from free out of thick reference books i havent read in years.

this is how I shit but a little closer to the edge and not looking down at the shit.

Lel never grows old

now i understand his expression

he was playing 21 dimensional chess this whole time

how do you squat like this and not piss all over the place? idk about you guys, but I usually go #1 when I go #2, too.

DO NOT SQUAT ON A TOILET

A brazilian woman started squatting to shit and after a while her toilet collapsed and her fucking leg was cut off. You can find pictures on liveleak.

This is no joke. Don't squat on the edge of a normal toilet seat. The porcelain can't take the weight like that. There's reports about people getting hurt badly trying to do this.
If you really want to try to connect with your ape roots and use this squatting idea, there's special stools you can buy that go around the toilet seat for your feet to rest on.

/r/ing pic of chick who sliced her leg in half on broken toilet

is that a turd or his ballsack

if you are too weak to squat without tightening even worse you can do this, and try to hold your weight on your arms, you dont shit with them so its fine, just dont tighten from abs down. Eventually youll train your muscles to hold your weight since you probably go everyday.

it hurts everytime I shit but I just keep shitting I don't get afraid or anything, my ass only bled once when I tried to squat the indian way

lol yes do this I hope the porcline slips and cuts all you lebbet fuckheads in half

The correct way is having it come out your butthole. It really doesn't matter what way you are standing or sitting when it does come out.

Don't want to save it on my computer

bestgore.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/woman-cut-ass-cheeks-ceramic-toilet-bowl-01-500x449.jpg

I actually use a stool to raise my legs up while I'm on the toilet. Got rid of my hemorrhoids. True story.

use your hand to keep it aimed properly

well it helps if you arent 400 pounds

sit down and lean forward to mimic a squat position

/thread

>Backwards, inside-out shirt

Is he retarded or something?

Are you 50?

>well it helps if you arent 400 pounds
you are a fucking retard

i'm really curious what the anatomical term for the fucking U bend bone or fibre or whatever the fuck that loop going around my anal canal is supposed to be

i mean i'm assuming it's not pure bullshit made up by some hippy faggot who wants me to shit in a street like nature intended

I think my benis is too short to successfully clear my balls and be able to hit inside the bowl.

...

This also works. It's how I used to poop as a kid.

That bend helps you not be incontinent. Poop moves decently fast in the large intestine and the bend slows it down. You might not be clenching hard enough and poop could fly out if it was a straight shot.

No, just 30 and work a bullshit desk job and didn't eat enough fiber. Gave me 'rhoids that were exacerbated by shitting in standard western fashion. Changed my diet a little bit and started shitting with a stool and it's been all good. Feels good too. Shit just falls out and you're completely empty. You should try it my nigga.

>leaf can't recognize retards

this pic related is correct, jump into toilet void

Most americans are unfortunately too fat to even try that move.

Imagine a fat dude trying to squat on a toilet like that.

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IMPOSSIBRUUUUUUUUUUUU

>assuming it's not pure bullshit made up by some hippy faggot
I think this thing is real considering how all primates shit that way.

Nah, you don't need to squat in the toilet, you just need put a box or something under your legs like pic related.

That pic is pretty much my set up except I didn't buy some special fucking shitting stool. Just bought a short collapsible foot stool and keep it next to the toilet.

You don't shit in the street like a savage, you don't balance like a gymnast and maybe cut your leg off, you just prop your legs up and take a shit. It's really pretty easy.

Wat

there really is no use for the newspaper, it takes 1 min max this way.

>Be in China at some Chinese bitch's apartment
>Have to shit
>She has a fucking squat toilet
>Shit all over her floor because I misaligned my anus with her third world """toilet"""
>Luckily the toilet doubles as a shower, so I can just wash everything away
>Fuck her in her yellow vagoo afterwards

What a time to be alive.

WHAT THE FUCK? IT WORKS!

Can we talk about the German shitledge?
Can any Deutschfags explain this?

I want to try this, but my toilet seat is tiny, no room for squatting.
Maybe I should buy a stool.

>squatting

how am i supposed to relax and play gameboy? its like one of the few times i have to myself

Told you.

out of memes, beats me, grab a piece of notebook paper, curve it to funnel back to the toilet, pee on that

Peruvian engineering. Brilliant in its simplicity.