Congratulations!

You've just become president of the United States of America and it's your first day on the job.

What's the first thing you do?

Kill Obamacare.

deploy entire nuclear arsenal on southern Ontario and Quebec

Jerk off

declassify everything

Piss on the declaration of independence

This

put jews and niggers in death camps and gas them

Legalise da ganja, mon.

build a wall