What are you guys going to give to your GFs this Valentines Day?

What are you guys going to give to your GFs this Valentines Day?

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I guess everything really is bigger in Texas.

>plus-size lingerie

>Texas
>plus size lingerie

God damn it.

Behead my wife and then get some milk.

A border wall so that our kids can live without criminals.

Man Iowa is pure as fuck. Washington has the right idea though.

>What are you guys going to give to your GFs this Valentines Day?

The gift of my Girthy, rigid cock. Which resembles a gnarled tree branch submerged in a Louisiana swamp.

>alaska flower delivery
daaaaww

>Couples Pajamas.
Why is California full of manchild liberals?

Staying home together, read some books cozy in bed, watch porn together for the first time, not sure how to aproach the last one.

>couples pajamas

>mixtape

Kek

>mixtape

>Iowa
>Tandem bicycles
Goddamn, you fuckers are so vanilla it hurts.

Gotta go with futa. It's got parts you both can enjoy.

Since my right hand is the only gf I ever had but still is faithful after 22 years I'm gonna do something nice to her and give her a massage with her favourite hand lotion.

>>Blackest State

>Edible underwear

Damn I never knew how kinky the Amish were.

>mississippi: mixtape
what the fuck

Sorry that we don't need a Mixtape to spice up our love life.

>Zakes Jewelry

Fuck, that's pretty accurate.

Nothing. I dont see the point, ive pretty much decided to break up with her this weekend

>WV

YOU COULDNT MAKE THIS SHIT UP

...

>(((Helzberg Jewelry)))

I seriously stared at Alabama for twenty seconds

Alabama. Lord fucking Byron. Not edible panties. Not Larry the Cable Guy DVDs. But Gordon Lord Byron.

Am I not getting it?

Seems like Alaska is behind by few decades

Venereal disease.

What girlfriend?

Oh Texas...

I'm going to give my black mistress the gift of my white shaft

Sperm

Too fucking stupid to be true, unless the US have been under a wave of irony the entire year

Why?

Just wait a little bit senpai

Rape.

My ex broke up with me on valentines day last year
I was in love with her
She left and went back to Australia
I wish it was all just banter

>WA state
>Bear skin rug

Lol, didn't know that was a common thing here, but my aunt did receive one from my uncle for valentines day a few years ago.

New Mexico's is a totally legitimate question.

>mixtape

Ancient magiks.

>fruit soup

>plus size lingerie
>mixtape

It's actually rather accurate, as most Americans are legally retarded.

You can't make this shit up.

BRAAAAAAAAAAAAPGRIOGRJTPPTTT

>Cheap Gifts
My favourite desu

>couldn't handle the irl bantz

look at this soft cunt

>Bicycle demolition derby
I would unironically be interested in seeing that.

>cheap sex toys
>Couples Tattoo
>Cheap Gifts
>Mixtape
Stay Classy Rust Belt

THE SAME GUY EVERY TIME

Why are you so obsessed with farts?

I don't know if you're new to Sup Forums, but it's probably not the same guy every time.

My so called ex loved this mixtape I bought her in Mississippi. She left me to start dating a girl for about 3 months. I started dating someone new and when she learned she freaked out. When I said I wouldn't get back together with her due to the betrayal, she killed herself.

She gave me the mixtape back in accordance to the will.

>adam & eva
What's the best state and why it's Idaho?

>porbo
thats literally just dust

>gf

...

>He doesn't know that the stupid American meme is real

Cute.

Flowers, Balloons and some of her favorite snacks. She can't have peanuts and doesn't like chocolate so those are a no go. Maybe I'll buy her some fruit too.

pic related

Why is the Depp South so much classier and high brow compared to all the childish drivel elsewhere?

he's trying to be ascended

>Kama Sutra
Virginia isn't too far behind.

That's not just stupid, a legit mongo wouldn't search for e-mail stamps. I dun bilivit

Mississippians are cheeky cunts

BRAAAAAAAAAAAAPGRIOGRJTPPTTT

>tandem bicycle
l-lewd

hickey here
please tell me the best place to get bear skin rug my washington friends

>I really would have thought ours would have been musical valentines messages

With quotes from Google you only get 242 results.

youtube.com/watch?v=a6CIxJaYel4

...

idunud I guess some (((Helzberg Jewelry)))

>your GF

You can imagine the main boss being on a penny farthing crushing the electric bike fags.

youtube.com/watch?v=a6CIxJaYel4

like i needed more proof idaho is the best state

>portland

I assumed it was a bunch of antifa, but close enough.

>silk sheets

classy af desu senpai

>Tandem Bicycle

Awww

>Which resembles a gnarled tree branch
jews got to your cock too, eh?

>totally different interests
> totally different values and beliefs
>we require totally different levels of intimacy
>we basically got together because we fucked a few times and the sexual chemistry was good, and even that isnt really there anymore.
>weve been having problems and near-breakups for months but neither one of us has had the balls to officially end it.

Shes distancing herself so much at this point ill probably just send her a text saying "happy valentines day", to which i probably wont even get a reply

>Implying that I have a gf

Been here for six years, I swear to god it's the same fucking goy.

a bull :^)

>Alabama
>Lord Byron poetry

not bad guys, not bad at all

>mixtape
>plus size lingerie

>when send mail where does mail go
>do sweaters make u sweat
>difference between trees and wood
>gluten free bowling
>spread-sheets
>porbo
>why dosent dog lay eggs
>what is real estate
>chip clip stuck on finger
>gogole
>powerball winning numbers next week
>whats truck
>legal to say bitch online


HAHAHAHAH

Americans

>Sex Toys
>Cheap Sex Toys
>Mixtape
>Hickey
>Plus-Size Lingerie

>send her a text saying "happy valentines day", to which i probably wont even get a reply
fuckin hell iktf
I hope you enjoy yourself after you break it off

D

nvm, that's totally gay.

Oh, so I'm the only one who got there gf an extra large strap on cock so she can peg me while I cry?
Losers

>bear skin rug
Men do still exist

>not even a dragon cock
p gay

>is blackjack racist

(You)

Oh I believe it. People here can be that dumb. They're endlessly entertaining. Just the other day, a friend was arguing with me over the Spanish language and where it came from, he didn't believe it came from Spain. It's a Native Mexican language according to him.

Just a typical day for me. People say shit like this all the time. If you have a basic understanding of the world and how it works, you're going to be a fucking wise wizard to some parts of America.

i'm in texas. just go out to eat and some ice cream.

>2
You'd be surprised how dumb the average person is

>your gf

> Cheap Sex Toys
Why that distinction?
> Cheap Sex Toys

Kek

>whats truck
Yep, that's Virginia alright

this dick