Be american

>be american
>still listen to radio to find "good music"
>be american
>consider 20mbps as "high speed fibre internet"
>be american
>credit card has no PIN or paywave, still stuck in the 1950s with magnetic strip
>be american
>can't find Washington D.C. on a map
>be american
>still use analogue tv
>be american
>still use imperial measurements
>be american
>save up for college at age 3
>be american
>pay $20 000 for cold medication
>be american
>deny global warming
>be american
>take credit for other people's hard work (the internet, ww2)
>be american
>install metal detectors at school but can't buy textbooks
>be american
>still use guns, pretending it's the wild west
>be american
>pay slavery reparations
>be american
>still use fahrenheight
>be american
>MR FUCKING 62%!!!!!!!
>be american
>eh? lo siento! no hablo español señor!
>be american
>employer owns you (insurance, mortgage, healthcare etc)
>be american
>still use 120 voltage
>be american
>choke on kinder surprise
>have heart attack
>call 911
>ambulance comes
>they notice you possess an illegal chocolate egg
>call police
>get shot
>go to hospital
>end up $120 000 in debt and fined $15 000 for possess an illegal six pack of chocolate eggs
>walk out of hospital
>get shot

> be australian
> shit post on Sup Forums for attention

here is your (you)

>choking on a kinder egg

The weak should fear the strong

THats New Zealand

Lol, says the beta fags that let their parliament take their guns away.

The young offshoot Shitpostling is trying to out-do its parent.

same thing

>be Alternate Color Australia

They are both so infinitesimally relevant that it's not worth noting the difference.

>be american
>can't find Washington D.C. on a map