Be British

>Be British
>Run out of tea
>Think okay I'll just drink water then
>Drink water out of hot tap
>Get sick
>Go to NHS
>NHS filled with refugees
>Spent four hours waiting for doctor to see me
>Fifth hour passed
>Decide I needed to start being entertained
>Turn on the telly
>SAS comes crashing through the ceiling
>OI M8 YOU AINT PAID YOUR TV LICENCE
>Finally get go home after this ordeal
>Muslims burned down my house
>Move to the US
>Get called limey bastard a lot
I should just end it all right now

Other urls found in this thread:

theguardian.com/world/2015/jul/24/dark-skin-india-prejudice-whitening
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

>Be American
>get a papercut
>go to the hospital
>that'll be 10 thousand dollars plus tip
>it's ok at least a talking cheeto is my president

>Drink water out of hot tap

Why the fuck? There's a cold tap RIGHT THERE

>Be burger
>roll off of my double-kingsize bed, slip on my crocs
>bathe in my xtrasize jumbo shower™
>drop my bigmac on the shower, cry
>get down for breakfast on my stairlevator™
>mom made bacon and pancakes, tip mom
>sing the national anthem before eating
>pour half a gallon of high fructose syrup on cardboard tasting pancakes (no maple syrup, ‘cause fuck Canada).
>add 1 ounce of “I can’t believe it’s not butter” because never learned a reasonable standard international unit, so must use ounces like a retarded kid making up measurements
>Go to school, tip teacher
>Sing national Anthem, get frisked for guns before going to class
>1 hours of pep rally for big game, tip cheerleaders
>2 hours of learning about creationism
> 1 hour of being molested by priests
>returns home after being molested
>Hear gunshots
>kid with giant assault rifle going nuts MGMT.mp3
>third time this week
>mental note to tip the teachers extra to make sure they are frisking everybody
>police arrives eating donuts on mobility scooters
> they kill shooter, plus 3 or 4 black kids from the neighborhood
> police officers automatically acquitted, because black kids looked dangerous
>tip cops, sing national anthem while they get their medals

>cheeto
reddit pls go

>go back home, can’t eat tacos ‘cause they are too expensive (we needed that money to build a wall)
>get 4th mortgage on the same house
>watch as housing and credit markets collapse causing worldwide chaos
>buy tacos
>try to play fetch with my dog
>We both have heart attacks
>Get taken to hospital
>doctor is an Indian man, named Suresh
> my father complains Suresh is staling all the jobs
> father tells me that being schooled doesn’t mean being intelligent
> believe him, he is always employee of the month in Walmart
> tip Suresh
>get taken home, tip the ambulance guys
>MFW when 700,000.00 dollars bill arrives.
>Thank God we got rid of Obamacare.
>try to watch the news, but president Trump prohibited the news to transmit news
>end up watching 3 hours of Keeping up with the Kardashians
>next day go back to school
>have a surprise test on my American culture class!
>gonnafailthissohard.jpeg
>mfw the test is all about the Kardashians
> Ace test
>go back home
>make a thread praising Trump on Sup Forums
>itwasagoodday.txt

You're alrighty roody poo in the loo

you forgot the 4 hour wait

i dont understand why people claim america has faster service, sometimes you see a doctor fast sure, but other times you wait ages. And its not like you run over to the specialist that day if the doctor refers you there for something. You make an appointment and wait weeks or even months.

Why would you drink out of the hot water tap.

Why on earth are you choosing it?

Why would you drink from the hot tap?
And why would you get sick? We have clean water over here in first world countries.

What the fuck is happening a poo actually wrote a funny post???

>be poo
>cannot into loo

>muh brexit
Britshits are truly a subhuman race.

Bottom left in pic is British. Otherwise well played Pajeet, 8/10.

>be indian
>walking down the street
>see a pretty girl waiting for the bus
>brush my hand up against her butt
>keep going and whistling
>get onto public transportation
>start singing
>"KYUNKI TUM HI HO, AB TUM HI HO, ZINDAGI AB TUM HI HO! JAAN BHI, MERE DAARD BHI, MERI AASUQIUI AB TUM HI HO!
>get off bus
>go to paan wala
>"AREY BHAI! EK GOLD FLAKE - CHOTA NAHI, BADA BADA BADA BOOM!"
>light up my cigarette as mere yaar Rajev pulls up
>pull the collar on my 100 rupee polo up
>throw down my fake Ray Ban shakes and start singing Shah Rukh Khan song
>roll with Rajev down the gali
>throw down hard at GB road
>"AYYYY DID HEHE 300 RUPEE IS OKAY?"
>spend my 300 rupees
>walk out of Kotha No. 64
>high five my bro Rajev
>jump back on our bullet
>hop off at CP
>walk around in a big circle looking cool with our popped collars, Ray Ban, and manly attitudes
>see a nice gori
>"AAAAYYYY GORI YOU WANNA GO A RIDE ON MERE BIKE?"
>wonder why the gori is running away
>hear a ringing noise
>"AAAYYYY RAJEV EK SECOND BHAI... MAA KI PHONE AAYA"
>maa says come home abhi
>go home with my bro Rajev
>tell maa I was studying
>about to go to bed
>log onto Facebook
>set a cool slogan like "LOVE ME OR LEAVE ME........ MY WAY IS HIGHWAY" as status
>go to sleep feeling like SRK

YAMEROOOOOO

BICH WAT U SAY

If you drink hot tap water you deserve every misfortune that comes your way

The Soviets would color their enemies orange or red on TV and in print. Trump has normal skin color and you are a commie shill.

lol the same assdamaged poo is still posting the same pasta for hours now.

What's got your poo out of loo?

>Be American in bongland with my extended bong family

>Have serious medical issue that my family urges me to go to the emergency room for

>Spend less than an hour waiting despite the place being packed to the gills

>Doctor does my vitals and can see that I am in distress

>Send me upstairs and wait about another hour for a bed

>Get professional care and treated well, they keep me in bed even with me protesting about other people waiting

>Get charged nothing for the ordeal

>Have the same situation happen in America several years prior

>Took 3 hours to see doctor

>Doctor spends 5 minutes with me and gives me attitude because he felt my condition wasn't severe despite the emergency ward being filled with illegals with colds

>Practically push me out onto the street still under great duress

>Hospital spends 6 months trying to gouge me for thousands of dollars despite having a 100 dollar ER co-pay

For all the shit you talk the NHS still does better under great strain.

jokes on you - I dont have a tap licence to cover hot water so that would never happen to me m8

india i don't even need to insult you


you already know

You fucking wish your Queen ran the global drug trade and ordered JFK killed. But she doesn't cos your Queen is that weird African dude with the Hitler 'tache from Helsinki.

Love this pasta even though I don't understand half of it

>t. Buttblasted fatasses
>NO sense of humour

>t.shittooth Hillbilly.

>be american
>drink cold tap
>turn trans then suicide after 2 years


>be californian
>turn on tap
>nothing comes out

>that'll be 10 thousand dollars plus tip

I had a chuckle.

You know I live near Seattle and own more than one Yacht and my home is paid for in a very expensive location. Meanwhile you lack indoor plumbing and I make more money in a week than you do in your entire life. Soon you will die of a horrible flesh-eating bacterial infection and be unceremoniously tossed into the ganges to rot. Even the lowest of our American Rednecks is vastly superior than anyone who emerged from the open cesspit you live in.

>be american
>pay only 16% taxes
>employer provides me with medical insurance
>go to hospital
>pay small co-pay
>the rest of the bill is covered

>knows why you don't poo in loo
>be American woman go to college
>share dorm with poo in loos
>walk in on poo in loos washing hair in loo

>Britbongs think it's normal to go to the doctor for a paper cut

>t. Buttblasted Cracker
S H A R T
H
A
R
T

>be californian
>turn on tap
>nothing comes out

Your joke is 1 year too late.
Now it's
> Be Californian
> Drown because you forgot what water was

>needing a referral to see a specialist
You must have garbage insurance.

I got a papercut and didn't go. Because I hadn't renewed my paper handling license and didn't want to spend the next 25 years doing hard time.

This shit is funny. Lol.

Lol. That doesn't apply to me or mine but pic related is the world you call your own. Dogs will eat the decomposing corpses of your deceased relatives on the banks of the Ganges sewer.

>Hyper ultra-triggered hillbilly
Kek, Tubby, I can see that vein throbbing through the multiple layers of your greasy lard. Calm down now. No Obamacare to bail out your poor ass now

You jelly because you can't afford food?

...

What's wrong with drinking water out of a hot tap?

>comeback weaker than your erection
Cmon Tubby you can do better. I'll help. Just imagine Jamal humping your underage sister who's enjoying every bit of it. That should get the juices flowing!

The piping isn't used for carrying drinking water, the water they produce contain a lot higher values of metals, copper in particular.

>serious medical issue

t. fatso

I hope you get to experience IBS in your lifetime that's so severe you can't even take a sip of water without violently throwing up and lose 20 pounds in a fortnight because you can only eat broth.

Have you tried turning your country off and on again?

Also lead based pipe solder in combination with grounding the home's electric wiring to the pipes causes lead poisoning and retardation.

Wow you sure told me! Hey why don't you post a pic of yourself here, let's have a look at you and your living environment/quality of life.

The drought ended like month ago, retard.

>I was born in Murica ergo I am the Bestest. Fuck yeah
Mighty yuuge achievement there, Bubba. You sure were a bigly awesome fetus that your crackwhore mum just couldn't bring herself to do pic related to

Really getting to you isn't it?

Hmmm should I go out sailing today or just stay home and drink beer? Decisions decisions...

At this point we all just have to ask. Is it the curry and sandpaper TP that is causing all the butthurt. Or is it the sad crushing realization that you live in India? Either way you should watch your BP, all that salt can't be good for ya poo.

Why not both Ameribro?

I had a bad experience once so I don't mix sailing with alcohol. If I drink when on my boat it's anchored down or at the dock. I live in the Puget Sound and we have crazy currents, waves and weather which can happen from one moment to the next so you really have to be on top of your game.

>pic title
>White racial superiority
What did he mean by this?

The fact that you are so desperate to mock and denigrate white people completely reveals your deficiencies. You will never be white no matter how much skin lightening cream you apply to your dusky mug. You so wish you could be white and powerful like us.

theguardian.com/world/2015/jul/24/dark-skin-india-prejudice-whitening

>>Move to the US
>>Get called limey bastard a lot
>I should just end it all right now

All banter aside, Limeys are cool.

- Burger

>white and powerful like us
Kek. When was the last time you displayed that power outside the internet in your basement i.e before superior Antifa and BLM?

Oh wow you are trying to provoke me. Antifa and BLM don't exist in my region, and if they did I have ways and means of dealing with them. If it wasn't for Jewish media hype nobody outside of a few tiny places would know they exist. You know for normal people all they are is a comedy show irl.

>Jewish media hype
So these are your "news sources" eh? Not to mention RT.

And I thought only uneducated hicks voting for Trump was a meme...

>he doesn't know every media outlet is owned by the jews