ITT: YOU are now jews

Repeat after me:"ברוך אתה מיצי אלוהינו מלך העולם, שעשה ניסים באבותינו ובפורצאן אמן"

Note: if you really repeated me and wonering if it will work, your nose growed a bit in the process
youtube.com/watch?v=6QmRxlrLzyo

Other urls found in this thread:

youtu.be/YHu87vWimTg
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

wtf i said that and found money in my pockets
fucking A

cant make this shit up

Good chaim, thats the spirit

Why did my nose just grow 4 inches

its part of the process, why do you think all the jews have big nose? its because god use it to identify his jews

soo fucking ugly
like fucking chicken scratches

This post gave me inhereted epigenetic holocaust trauma

holocaust trauma? oy vey remember the 6 millions

You are now Canadians

Repeat after me dude weed lmao

dude weed lmao

oh wtf, its worked, i feel now 100x times more pussy and have a huge love to trudeo

shabbat shalom
going to buy some matzo ball soup now

shabat shalom to you aswell moishel

Finally, I can become a true Jewjitsu master like I've always wanted! Thx senpaistein.

you are not a real jew without a big and curved nose. its written in the Bible under God's constitution.
"ויעל אפו כגודל אגרוף ויתעלה ויתעקם ברוך אתה יהוה אלוהינו מלך החוטם"

i can't read fucking runes

I want my free circumcision before I repeat anything you freaks

>Choosing rebellion over salvation
>Choosing Barabbas over Jesus


Yeah ... no

*Get's engulfed by massive desire to destroy the west through fractional reserve banking*

I have a big kike nose (I'm Eastern European) when I wear my dark suit all the Jewish girls smile at me. What are the chances of bringing home an orthodox cutie and slipping her my uncut cock?

Whats the transliteration for this?

kek

The transformation came upon me like a cash machine spewing out those precious shekels. I gasped and recoiled in my chair, thrusting myself away from the computer as my nose began to grow rapidly. "No," I cried, a nasal wailing in a Jew Yorkish accent. "Stop it!"

But it didn't stop with my nose. My body shuddered, and fear of what was to come made my legs weak as jello, and I sank to the floor as I tried to stand. Then with my new kike sight I spotted a shimmering golden coin on the floor, forgotten beneath a heap of dusty cables. It shone like the sun. "Shekelssssssss," I hissed, throwing myself towards it.

Oh, how glorious it was to grab, sweeter than any soft and plump female thigh or breast. My heart fluttered in my chest, my new fat lips, like two fat worms fucking, spread in a too-wide grin, revealing crooked teeth.

I rolled over to my stomach, grabbed my white-and-blue yamaka from the floor and pushed myself up, the six-pointed star of David facing the ceiling. Stroking my weak chin, I eagerly scanned the room for more shining shekels waiting to be discovered.

It was then that my gaze fell upon the clock on the wall, and I let out a horrified screech. "Oy vey," I yammered. "OY VEY!"

The time was exactly 6 AM. 6, like muh 6 gorrilion. I howled as memories that were not my own flashed through my mind. Oy vey, the ovens, the great sacrifice for Israel! I couldn't stop myself. I had to tell someone.

My girlfriend had heard my screeching and came rushing into the room, her beautiful face pale as white, white as the race that must be destroyed. Her soft blonde locks, that I had loved to run my fingers through as we made love, tumbled over her shoulders as she came rushing around the corner. Her beauty struck me, yet it also filled me with a gutwrenching envy, for I knew none of my jewish brethren could ever be as beautiful as a white woman.

She recoiled at the sight of me, covering her mouth with a hand, her sky-blue eyes widening.

[CONT]

[CONT]

“user!” She gasped behind her trembling hand. “What- what has happened to you? Oh god, your face… WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO YOUR FACE?”

I stood there, frozen. Her tone hit me like the lash of a whip. My face. I raised a hand to touch it. My throat convulsed as a stream of words gathered in the pit of my stomach, quickly rising to erupt from my mouth.

“You anti-semite!” I hissed, lifting an accusing finger to point at her; as if I were a SS guard in a concentration camp pointing the barrel of a gun at a poor jewish prisoner, sneering. “How dare you? You- you are nothing but a filthy goyim…!”

The words left my jewish mouth before I could stop them. Confusion filled her eyes – oh, the ignorance of the cattle.

“What is wrong with you?” She shot. “What the hell is a goyim? user?”

I began to rock back and forth, rubbing my hands together nervously, yet still infuriated and offended. “Muh six gorrillion,” I muttered to myself. Images flashed before my mind. That damned door no one could explain, that wooden door. Oy vey.

But the transformation had given me heightened intelligence, honed razor-sharp by generations of selective inbreeding, and she- my love, as beautiful as gold, her voice as musical as the sound of coins in a pocket, she was not worthy.

“Sweetheart,” I allured, beckoning with a crooked hand. “I have something to show you.”

“What has happened to you?” She demanded, arms crossed, standing defiant. She wore a white t-shirt with a stupid print on it, her breasts stretching the fabric. Oy vey, the tricks of goyim women. “What did you call me before?”

“Nothing, sweetie, nothing.” I smiled at her, as benevolent as I could muster, still rubbing my hands together. “Come here and look at this.” I once again gestured towards my computer. I could fix her.

[CONT]

“No.” She shook her head, blonde locks dancing around her face. Her eyes had narrowed in suspicion. As I extended a hand to her, she pulled back, her fine features twisting.

“You… you look like a jew. They wear those things on their heads.”

“Anti-semite,” I hissed, clutching my yamaka to hide the balding spots on my head as I hurled the words at her like the deadly ammunition they were, the tranquilizer to western pride.

“Just come and look at this.” I would fix her. We could still be together in a bright, golden future, filled with shekels and diversity for the west.

With her blue eyed narrowed, she slowly made her way over to my side, now standing half a head taller than me.

“You know I don’t like that stupid site,” she sighed, turning away as soon as she saw the Sup Forums logo. “It’s where they post crossdressers and jerk off to nazi frogs, isn’t it?”

“Traps are not gay,” I protested out of habit, whilst slipping an arm around her slender waist, pulling her towards me. “I need you to watch something for me, and read after me-“

“Oh, for fucks sake, not again,” she rolled her eyes, trying to pry my fingers off her waist. “I’m not falling for this again. Last time you had me watch some stupid popup screamer. Fuck off with that.”

“No, it’s nothing like that.” I gave her a wide grin, but her mouth remained stuck in that twisted grimace of disgust of my new jewish visage. “Give it a try. You’ll like it.”

She placed the headphones on her head, giving me a suspicious glare. I rubbed my hands together as she clicked play.

Yes, you will like it.

K

Sup Forums's theme song:

youtu.be/YHu87vWimTg

Autism.

Hmm, I look a bit like a Jew.

Shalom!
Where are my shekels?

What if I'm already a jew?

Kaz, I'm already a Jew.

>Mohammed Silverberg

By the way how do you Saudis use Sup Forums? I thought it was blocked in your country.

Because of some odd unknown reason, if we add https:// before boards.Sup Forums.org/whatever/, it becomes unblocked, and if we don't, blocked again.

really makes me go ?????????

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME OP!
HאT O Pי אלSוהיLם
הו למה בכלל אני משתוקק האתרים הללו הגויים

A FUCKING H

Still not Trudeau's slave.

That's Quebec, not Canada

I was doing that too by putting www before the Sup Forums. not long after that it got 100% b&. now I use opendns and dnscrypt.

ᛃᛟᚢ᛫ᚺᚨᚡᛖ᛫ᚾᛟ᛫ᛈᛟᚹᛖᚱ᛫ᚺᛖᚱᛖ

>spartacus level of proof meme template

gonna use it

WELCOME TO THE SHEKELTEMPLES, GOY!

keep going sven

DON'T PANIC BUT THERE ARE GOYIM IN THIS THREAD RIGHT NOW

jeez i dont even wonder whos behind this post

ומחזירים לתנור

ברוך אתה מיצי אלוהינו מלך העולם, שעשה ניסים באבותינו ובפורצאן אמן