I've Done It All /r9k/

>be dating girl four years ago
>she breaks up with me for her ex
>never date since except for one girl for a few months
>decide I'm going to become alpha male
>become /fit/, easily do 1/2/3/4 all 5x5
>become intelligent and finish top of my class for undergrad, top for my master's degree, and win graduate award for getting a paper published
>become /biz/ and make $10k in a few months trading crypto and start working for bank, no debt, great income
>get back in touch with faith and go to Presbyterian church and start living a "good" life, no smoking, promiscuous sex, less drinking, etc.
>everything
>do everything I can to become "alpha"
>see same ex girlfriend at store
>we agree to go to lunch
>end of lunch I try to kiss her
>get rejected hard
>just get out of car and delete her number
I've realized today, /r9k/, I'm still a fucking beta. All this, this money making shit, the /fit/ shit, the religion shit, the many hours I spent hitting the books and getting a masters, paper published, etc... It isn't worth it. It's never "enough"... My whole existence was contingent on showing her that I'm not a beta bitch so I try to succeed in EVERYTHING. But, it's not enough. It never will be enough for her. I will never be enough for her.

I feel like all this shit I've done has been a waste. All the hours in the gym, studying, networking for jobs, learning finance, whatever. It's all a fucking waste. I feel as if I've had a huge epiphany. When you place your whole existence on just trying to get back at someone (or get back with them? I don't know anymore, honestly...), you will never get anywhere.I was crippled after this encounter. I just went back to my apartment and laid in bed staring at the ceiling. The only thing I can rationalize out of all this is, in my attempts to become a better person BECAUSE OF HER, I lost myself... My whole identity on becoming "alpha" was in fact beta from the beginning because it was contingent on getting back together with some ex girlfriend.

>r9k
You can't do anything right

Comment too long to say, /r9k/, but all I can say is thanks for being here listening to my story... I'm ready for you all to call me a faggot. I don't care. I'm defeated at this point.

My life doesn't feel worth living at this point because it's a lie. Nothing I ever do will be good enough for my father, my ex girlfriend, or anyone for that matter...

The people who I seem to care most for don't seem to care one bit what I try to do even if its FOR THEM.

Whatever. Just needed a rant. Thanks robots.

Fug. Might as well just off myself at this point.

>not sageing a slide thread

>this upset because your ex gf rejected you
Grow up, faggot. There are plenty of women out there; your ex isn't the only one.

...

Alpha is an attitude, not the things you do. All you did you did for women or for you ex, not for YOURSELF.
Assuming this isnt pasta, on a breakup only the one who broke up has the power to restart, if you want to be alfa live for yourself and date to spread the joy of your well ordered life

> Turns from fat dumb beta into amazing human
> Still gives some dumb roastie the power to control him emotionally

Are you actually retarded user? Go and enjoy your mental, physical and financial gains. Whoever she is, I can guarantee you she's 100% not worth your time.

How about you get with some other girl? What is even so great about her.

And yeah a lot of what guys do has to do with impressing girls. But guess what, there's more than one out there. And all the work you put in will impress them too.

>doing lunch with an ex

Yea, that's a friend date unless it's an afternoon fuck at your place. Don't do that. Dinner and drinks.

>whole existence was trying to prove worth to some bitch who dumped you
>surprised still beta

Good job

Based

kys

Why would you care about people who don't care about you?

...

she sounds terrible.
Get a black anime watching gf

You'll be fine, just relax and meditate on your epiphany for a few days, take some free time from your job and most of all,
forget that whore.

>improves himself
>trys to go back to his oneitis
which of these were a bad idea user, you didnt listen, or learn anything

I'm ok with this.

You dumb nigger you don't accomplish that shit to get that slit back. You accomplish all that shit to get a younger, prettier slit with bigger tits to make her feel like a piece of shit.

My friend, you don't need that woman, you never did, you were doing completely fine without her!

I say, you keep going with your education, your excercise, and your business.

we've all been there desu.
hang in there.
try stocism to combat depression / rejection
rise above it all and improve yourself even more.
good luck mate

That's kinda kawaii

>you're a beta if you get rejected by one girl

I guess 93% of world male population are beta then.
Here's a question you should ask: have any other girl rejected you besides her?

if no then you're no beta

if yes then you're probably a beta

What the fuck?

>Flags

Oh

>S-she doesn't like me, that whore!

Lol nerd this is literally all your fault

Jeez dude all that stuff you said - you do it for you, to get better, smarter, and be healthier. It's not like having a flash car or something just to show off with. Look on life like a game, it's not a one shot deal, you just try again until you start winning.

you got it the other way around desu
The more you get rejected, the stronger and alpha you become.