FYI, stay in touch with your local military recruiters

FYI, stay in touch with your local military recruiters.

As soon as the invasion of Syria begins, sign-up bonuses will skyrocket back upwards to $80k.

Here's your chance to make history and be part of one of those 15 month long deployments where'll you'll go from killing enemy combatants in uniforms to random children and women with suicide vests.

Come back with some chronic PTSD and some other health issues and you'll be set for life with VA disability payments.

Life insurance payments are still at $500k, so even if you're blown up or beheaded by some moderate rebel you can still set up your senpai for life.

Do not miss this once in a lifetime chance of partaking in humanity's favorite past time sport, war!

Other urls found in this thread:

latimes.com/nation/la-na-national-guard-bonus-20161020-snap-story.html
youtube.com/watch?v=xm6hC2oW5P8
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Bales
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

Mfw too old to enlist

>MFW permanently crippled in a car accident
>MFW I've dodged multiple bullets by first being too young and then being crippled
>MFW no face

Thank god I'm in that boat too. But all those Millenials, all those jobless indebted Millenials...

>Broken back
>Cant stand more than a minute according to my charts
>Really I just cant run for more than 20 minutes
>mfw working as a contractor to the chair force during this

>all those jobless indebted Millenials...
no loss

>come die for Israel goy

How old is too old? Because I might be down for war but I might also be too old

THANK YOU FOR FIGHTING FOR ISRAEL

Singn Me Up Willie, I'll Take Two!

>But all those Millenials, all those jobless indebted Millenials...

Same thing happened with Vietnam. That war turned a whole generation of sissified, directionless beatniks and hippies into angry, weary, cynical family men. It'll happen again

So you're saying the Jews are controlling Putin? Because Putin is the one pulling the strings in Syria/Iran.

Well, if we start taking these people out of the states to get blown up, that helps with the labor supply issue somewhat. Fucking illegals still gonna make it a bit lopsided though after the war.

Lots of nations pulling lots of strings over there.

Sure thing, Schlomo

latimes.com/nation/la-na-national-guard-bonus-20161020-snap-story.html

>You will never be proud American patriot
>you will never serve your country by removing evil dictator that is Assad
>you will never die clutching flag of star and stripes

It's never too old. My old team leader was "that old dude who quit his job to join after 9/11"

Unfortunately he kinda went off the deep end later on, got into the habit of being perma-drunk and one night decided to neutralize a whole Afghani family in an apartment close to our base.

Isn't it great?

>Life insurance payments are still at $500k, so even if you're blown up or beheaded by some moderate rebel you can still set up your senpai for life.

500k isn't shit in the life insurance business

>try to join
>good health and asvab score
>can't get in because two previous arrests
INVADE SYRIA, I NEED TO BE A WELFARE QUEEN

>and one night decided to neutralize a whole Afghani family in an apartment close to our base.

holy shit, that kind of stuff happen often over there?

yay i cant wait to die!

I like your posts OP
Miss that kind of dry, stingy humour

I really wanted this to be fake. Now, I just want to publicly execute every piece of shit in position in the US government. Everyone over the age of 40 in the government is invariably a selfish leech that wants to misdirect the public and make money doing it. The should hang/decapitate everyone with a title and start anew a la the French Revolution.

Just saying...the Assad regime poses an existential threat to the state of Israel. I'm glad Trump is taking a firm stance on this. I enlisted yesterday actually, as soon as I heard that we were invading Syria.

Thank god i was listed as not trustworthy and got kicked out of the army.

Fight for my protection cucks:)

Awesome. I was looking at enlisting in the Marines. Its the last year I can before I'm too old.

how old is too old? like 28?

..You really don't think mass rapes/killings happened?

Here's a video of Blackwater cruising around Iraq randomly killing citizens kek

youtube.com/watch?v=xm6hC2oW5P8

You kid, but Im ready

Someone post the Die for Israel meme

Lmao. Wave some shekels in you goys' face and you're ready to fight for Israel. The white race is done for.

Jews are controlling ISIS

ISIS - Israeli Secret Invasion Service

Don't worry about those previous charges there son.... Ol' Uncle Sam has a spot for you in the Infantry! How would you like to start basic training on July 1st?

Hard to define what "happens often" in war. I can tell you that when it happens it's usually big news, like my boy who's chilling in Ft. Leavenworth now.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Bales

But I can also tell you for every high profile case there's like 50 cases that went unreported because most people in the military aren't snitches who tell on each other. We prefer to deal with everything in-house.

28. The wife won't be too happy, but I don't really care. I want more from life than working a desk job

sir, yes sir!

i've been trying for a god damn year, they'll take in weak women and fat faggots but they won't take me because of some bs charges that got dropped.

Do they need language specialists at all? Would love to learn Arabic so I can watch Memri TV all day.

While it doesn't disprove that such incidents happen, pointing to the employees of a private company as evidence of such atrocities by military personnel isn't evidence that it does occur.

Nice try, though.

You'll get a waiver as soon as Syria kicks off.

I served in Iraq with a fucking bank robber.

I turned 18 last month, who else is joining thE Marines this summer?? Let me know.

I CANT WAIT TO FIGHT FOR DONALD TRUMP! I LOVE DONALD TRUMP AND I WANT TO ENLIST SO BADLY!

its times like these i'm glad to be a trustfund babby so i don't have to go fight jewish wars in order to have some financial security

I have contacts will I be provided the eye-wear or will I need surgery?

Well, back in 05' they were taking anybody and everybody as long as they could pass a physical. If anything large starts up you should head over to your local recruiter. I hear that national guard is good for those that want to serve but can't get in full time. Marines are stricter in some areas, but provided you are not 29 they should let you in (provided you don't have any felonies)

35 is the cut off age

No one has to fight, it's a choice.

>MFW no face
what?

>enlist
>get high af ASVAB score
>end up pencil pushing and mowing lawns in Kane'ohe bay sitting on that fat enlistment bonus
>fly to Thailand and fuck hookers on leave
>wait out conflict without ever firing weapon and comfortably retire in early 30s

I've been waiting for a new war to happen so I can enlist

a choice often made for the money...

>Be NEET with high functioning autism
>Psychiatrist says people with high function autism can not join the miliary.
>Stuck being NEET even during ww3
fug

Young man like yourself? (Yes I did just assume your gender) Surely, you would prefer to be in the air force or in the navy. We need Jets refueled and general maintenance and Ships will need to be build. Not all service puts people on the front lines. You could be living in Germany sorting mail for the Air Force!

You fake ass niggers can buy a plane ticket and fight against ISIS right now with the anti-ISIS rebel groups in Syria. You other fake ass pro-Assad niggers can also fly to Syria right now and fight for Assad in one of the foreign fighters groups.

You can fight, kill, and risk your life in combat according to your own moral principles RIGHT NOW without subjugating your will to the international Jew.

None of you are willing/capable of warfighting in the ways you are describing according to the fact that you already have the opportunity to do so, but instead you are are sitting here on Sup Forums discussing this in the same way that normies discuss football rivalries.

In summary, you are all a bunch of fake ass niggers, and to appropriate a phrase used by the niggers themselves, "you aren't about that life."

bin laden did nothing wrong

>people are cheering for an Iraq 2.0
at this rate, Europe will be a caliphate by 2025

True. But trust-funders are traitors anyway so it's not like you'd fight anyway.

>Doesn't get the use of MFW
>Uses Reddit/imgur-tier meme

Go away.

Marine Corp is a part of the department of the Navy... Would rather not look at mail though, Looking into Communications

Thanks, I'm not even trying, this is just what the military turned me into. A healthy dose of cynicism and dark humor will get you through anything

Once we started noticing that a lot of dude's penises were getting dismembered but stayed in tact after explosions, we started writing each others names on our dicks just to fuck with the morticians later on in case we got blown up.

I know for a fact that two of my best friends are buried with each others dicks in their coffins

no homo

russian shills strong today. they must think Sup Forums sets policy. we've been at war for 14 fucking years you moron, nothing is different

>Want to join military
>But don't want to join the army
>Only have a GED because my parents neglected me and never sent me to highschool

dude they wont list
They all bill go to the university and make it a MORE left place

war is allways bad thing for the right, they lose the war and when you come home they blame you for starting it

>tfw diabetes

Fuck the marines

okay
but i have gf and you dont

Army is for Woman and Black dudes.

>Army
Green Beret training is barely on par with Marine basic

Alcohol is strictly not allowed while on deployment. People get it but if you're caught with it you'll get fucked up. The occurence of these kind of fucked up things are pretty rare and you'll be able to find the names and a thoroughly documented case of what happened (its international news and everyone loves to shit on the US).

Afghanis? You mean Afghans. I don't think you were anywhere, user, sorry.

This is your moment to die for israel

Good goy, go clean the land for Israel and send some more homeless refugees to Europe in the process.
You burgers are fucking retarded.

Like I'm gonna sign up to die for ZOG

rip steve, he was a great goy

>he's going to volunteer to die for zog

They fire because convoys aren't allowed to stop or they'll get bombed,

...

kys friend

No, those people were murderous psychopaths disregarding RoE. They couldn't put them in jail long enough for doing this kind of shit on taxpayers' money.

reeee

Can any military or intel bros help me out here?

If I want to be a pilot or agency analyst, would it benefit me at all to join my state's Air National Guard as a fusion analyst while in school?

> set up your senpai for life while they laugh and cuck you.

There's a reason Ostermark women never had relationships if their husbands died in battle. It's cause they'd come back and kill the fucker in his bed.

...

That looks fucking awesome. Fuck moralfags, I'm down for this plus everything OP said. You guys make it look bad but it's not, I reclassing to 11B when the war breaks.

Lot of black dudes in the Navy, too. Just call him a beaner. There's like an 80% population of Mexicans and Texans (northern Mexicans) in the Marine Corps.

You know you can apply for citizenship through service, right?

can i enlist as a non-us citizen?

I think you missed the point of the post

t. cuck.

Freedom isn't free you sheltered spoiled faggot

I don't want to know that feeling.

i thought steve was snorting blow in that picture when i first saw it

You mean the ROE that got so many troops killed?

No sympathy for these savages.

>That looks fucking awesome

Yes, if you want to destroy the reputation of the country you serve.. I am sure that would look awesome.

It's not about morals, it's about tradition.

>implying the US can afford paying for more veterans

>My face when
>No image

>>>Reddit

You're a moron and a cuck

You are a sheltered spoiled cuck

Once you fuckers start paying up we can!

No. Just go to the recruiter and tell them you want to be a pilot. The other thing is dumb.

Every branch has some kind of pilot program. Army I think it may only be warrant officers (for helos) but I"m probably mistaken. Every other branch requires you to be an officer (need a bachelors) to be a pilot.

You can usually sidestep this later on with some wonky admin shit but it'll be ~20 years down the road. College, commission, pilot school. Army you can enlist and then try and get into the warrant officer program for flying helos. Dunno how it works for Army after that.

Okay guys I just had a really funny idea. Pay attention. What if ISIS released a video of killing someone BY FARTING ON HIS FACE.

Just join your own military. You guys are always right besides us anyway

implying i won't volunteer without pay

no it's about morals.