Texas masturbation bill is now in the hands of the Texas State Affairs Committee

Link: chron.com/news/houston-texas/texas/article/Texas-masturbation-bill-is-now-in-the-hands-of-11052043.php

>"In March, Texas State Rep. Jessica Farrar, D-Houston, filed a bill that would penalize men for "unregulated masturbatory emissions" and the bill has now made its way into the hands of the Texas State Affairs Committee on Tuesday."

>"A lot of people find the bill funny," Farrar told Chron.com in March. "What's not funny are the obstacles that Texas women face every day, that were placed there by legislatures making it very difficult for them to access healthcare."

>"Jessica Farrar of Texas is proposing a bill that would create "a civil penalty for unregulated masturbatory emissions." HB 4260 is nicknamed "A Man's Right To Know," and would require men to receive a booklet about the risks of a vasectomy or Viagra prescription.

>A man will be fined $100 for "unregulated masturbatory emissions." The fines will benefit children in the care of the Department of Family and Protective Services.

>"Masturbatory emissions" must be stored for the wife to use for conception at a later time."

Welp, we're finally here fellas. They want to make it regulate how much you can fap.

This wont pass.... But if it did, any ideas on how they would enforce this?

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Are you sure it's not onion?

It was posted by Houston's local newspaper The Chronicle.

Unless it's satire... But I doubt it.

Stupid religious nigger cow, why not ban porn instead? Is CIA going to watch American toilets and bedrooms? Of course, since this way capitalistic religious pigs can charge penalties for masturbation, but never to solve porn or drug problem, since that's profit too. Wannabe moral preachers need bullet in the head. Maybe ban Mexicans and niggers so they stop masturaborting white human genes.

This bill is actually a response to doctors having to inform women about the risks of abortion or some shit. So it has nothing to do with religion.

>"The bill is a response to the current state law that requires doctor's give women considering an abortion the "A Woman's Right to Know" booklet, which Farrar refers to as a "guilt mechanism."

In her mind beating off and abortion are equal.

>they want to ban masturbation
Allow me to bury my sperm and play national hymn after i release it. I realize it's bigger crime than nuking North Korea, i know i just killed my baby sperms. RIP mucus.

Don't forget to pay your state mandated masturbation fine.

And to save your semen for a women to impregnate herself with, so that you can also pay her alimony later when she raises your child.

>people missing the point

What's the point, user?

>save the sperm for the woman
>it is now literally illegal to not get locked into a permanent cycle of child support

Female biological shit gets regulated all the time. Even outside of abortion.

This bill was satire making light of the disparity. No one is taking it seriously (although... small chance religious nuts might latch onto it)

>Masturbating
>Murdering an innocent third party
Totally the same

Why are leftists so bad at moral equivalence?

How are they going to know you have masturbated? Like how the fuck could you regulate that?

Who's the third party?

Sperm have unique DNA, and the potential to form a functional human.

Based Texans should pass this, then use it as excuse to ban abortion.

You can't enforce this one anyway, but you can enforce abortion laws.

>"Masturbatory emissions" must be stored for the wife to use for conception at a later time."

Fap into a jar and send it to them wholesale :^]

Your country could lend us some cameras.

there will be penis inspections days, they will take samples and determine the levels of protein coating the walls of your urethra, by sticking a hollow metal tube down your dickhole and taking a skin scrape.

I get that it's pointing out the disparity in regulation between the sexes. But it also wants to regulate men from getting colonoscopies, forcing them to get MRIs before they can receive a colonoscopy as well as not allowing men to seek legal action should a doctor decide to not give them treatment.

Basically: if you want to regulate abortion, then we're going to make it harder to detect colon cancer.

Good. White men should have to pay for their premature ejaculation.

... you still don't get it.

There are tons of weird, unrelated to pregnancy regulations that impact women. All of this bill is satire designed to highlight that.

SOMEONE POST THIS COWS FACE IN A Sup Forums CUM TRIBUTE THREAD!!!

Bills go to committee to die most of the time. Texas just has to be polite about killing this. Sucks they cant just go "lol, no." Have to be professional and shit.

>There are tons of weird, unrelated to pregnancy regulations that impact women.

Okay name some

Doesn't help that our legislature only meets like once every two years.

>Texas masturbation bill is now in the hands of the Texas State Affairs Committee
>now in the hands of
> in the hands of

W E W
E
W

If real, this is clearly a 'bill' meant as a protest against the abortion bills in Texas that have similar requirements like 'right to know' and waiting periods for women to get abortions

But Sup Forums will take this seriously because they're a bunch of teenagers who can't into subtext

wewe lad

>a bill that encourages men to only orgasm for reproductive purposes

I unironically support this.

Its just for spite regarding planned parenthood. She even says so.

Bitches being petty, as always.

I wonder why no one has pointed out the fact that she's comparing the pleasurable act of masturbation to abortion. Is she implying that abortion is in any way fun or pleasurable for women? Someone should spin this and shit on her. Surprised some radical feminist haven't already.

Its supposed to be a joke bill to counter something else, but instead of throwing it out, they are actually taking it legitimately because the left is retarded.

>Be woman legislator
>Draft parody law to ban masturbation
>"Surely no one will be that stupid"
>Legislators proceed to pass it

Once again Texas wins the special olympics of politics.

it would be pretty funny

look at that fat ugly spic
god I hate wetbacks

*waddles towards you

I understand the subtext completely. What pisses me off the most is the blatant waste of taxpayer money for this kabuki theater
>muh patriarchy
bullshit.

Modern satire is beyond the pale, it is through the inverted looking glass we see the actual truth now.

Remember the Alamo!

sperm is illimited

So this is what America has become? This is what our politicians spend their time on now? A fucking bill to try and regulate masturbation?

>There are still people on this board who believe America isn't spiraling towards collapse

Does sticking ur dick thru ur neighbors fence and having her dog lick ur dick count as masturbating?

Well, ignoring the fact that Planned Parenthood is not primarily performing abortions (so funding cuts to them cut out women's health in many areas)...

HPV vaccines had massive initial kickback, moral protests and legal challenges.

It took ages for non-abortificant birth control to be approved, and restrictions and regulations on birth control are a pain in the ass. Not even in the sense of "I WANT THE GUBMENT TO PAY FOR IT" more in the "pain in the ass to get it" department.

Did you people not read what the deal with that bill is? It's a stunt to point out how ridiculous some of the laws that apply to women are.

Jesus Christ why is Sup Forums so retarded?

Meanwhile, this country has real problems that need solving, and this fucking shit is actually being discussed in a court room some where. This is embarrassing.

>illimited

What does that have to do with it? A sperm is still a third party in the same sense that an egg or early fertilized ovum is. Unique, HUMAN DNA, potential to form a developed human.

>some of the laws that apply to women are.
which laws?

It is actually satire.

But one has to wonder why she spent her time drafting this bill, instead of ... you know... actually trying to repeal the regulations she doesn't like.

>The satirical House Bill 4260 would encourage men to remain "fully abstinent" and only allow the "occasional masturbatory emissions inside health care and medical facilities," which are described in the legislation as the best way to ensure men's health.

>A man would face a $100 penalty for each emission made outside of a vagina or medical facility. Such an emission would be considered "an act against an unborn child, and failing to preserve the sanctity of life," according to the legislation.

>Farrar is currently serving her 11th term as state representative for District 148. She works on issues that include women's health, sexual assault, reproductive rights, discrimination, juvenile justice and domestic violence.
She recently spoke out this week against the fetal remains bill, which would require hospitals to bury or cremate fetal remains, tweeting "The fetal remains bill imposes state-sponsored moral beliefs on women, affecting their ability to make personal decisions with their doctor."

Link: chron.com/news/houston-texas/article/Houston-representative-creates-a-bill-to-promote-10994871.php

These fucking cunts are out of control.

The direct corollary, if applied to women, would be to make menstruation illegal.

#OutlawEveryUnusedEgg !!!!!

In reality, it is a perfect example of how 4th wave feminism is nothing more than a female supremacist movement obsessed with completely controlling men and the world in general.

Imagine the outrage if it were reversed, and men tried to outlaw discharged eggs?

These psycho fucking sluts would douse each other in their period blood and scream at the top of their lungs at the steps of every government building in the USA.

Maybe that would be wortth some keks, eh boys?

Yeah, these politicians should solve problems through golf instead

Its a sign of how out of touch these people are. Imagine if these people actually had a supervisor they see daily, like you or I do.

>Legislators
>Court room

How is the 6th grade? You excited for summer?

I'm pro-choice and this is still fucking retarded.

Sperm is not a fertilized egg. No one has ever said it is. No one has ever said women can't masturbate (except muslims who cut off women's clits).

...

not if you're Canadian, then it's just consensual sex with a consenting individual

Y'know, if we actually could regulate ovulation or spermatogenesis... you probably would have benefited. It'd be a lot of tech I know... but...

We'd have been able to prevent that extra chromosome from burdening you.

????

>any ideas on how they would enforce it
They can't, it's just stupid women making stupid laws to prove stupid points.

Also, don't feminists complain about men controlling their reproductive rights and they are literally trying to control ours?

They want to own our sperm and fine us now. WTF. It has gone too far.

PENIS INSPECTION DAY COMETH

>ban porn

Define: Pornography : printed or visual material containing the explicit description or display of sexual organs or activity, intended to stimulate erotic rather than aesthetic or emotional feelings.

So you can generalize that to anything that shows any sort of view of Sexual Organs printed or visual, from yoga pants pictures to dudes in underwear. Adverts, Movies, TV, etc..

Feel like a stupid nigger?

By that logic, women should be penalized for every period they have. Looks like it's time for Texas to introduce a new bill charging women a fee for every month they are not pregnant.

Um because by highlighting the stupidity of laws in Texas that's exactly what she's doing.

>No one has ever said women can't masturbate

KEK

You're very young aren't you?

How can we get public support behind this? MGTOW mental illness statistics? Loss of productivity among masturbation addicts??

>Farrar is currently serving her 11th term as state representative for District 148

Then what has she been doing for the other 10 terms?

The concept of this going through would be hilarious. So much tax money spent on something so fucken stupid.

I hope it gets shut down and the retards pushing it get ridiculed and blacklisted from government and career advancement.

That's the point of this bill.

If you point out that A is punished in a ridiculous way, and B is seen as fine, and is like A... the solution isn't to punish B.

It's to remove punishment from A.

This is not a serious law, but rather an attempt to illustrate ridiculousness

True but you can make unlimited copies of it at any time of the day/month/year and at any age
you can't do that with an egg, and women can produce only 350 - 400 eggs in their life.

Why is a zygote alive when a sperm cell isn't?

Fuck off, you retarded cunt.

You're worried about reproductive rights for wormen, whilst admitting that sperm is just as critical in reproduction as eggs. Where the fuck are men's reproductive rights? If the cunt wants to murder my baby, and I want to keep it, guess who gets their way? This has happened to me, several times.

As for the 'satire' in this proposed bill, do you honestly think that fucking jokes have a place in politics?

I seriously can't wait for sexbots and artificial wombs so we can genocide all you spoiled, entitled cunts and thereby create a new humanity without your pernicious, ignorant, hysterical and neurotic influences.

Your logic is specious. There is no equivalence between murder and the release of gametes. This does nothing to defend the pro-choice cause, and instead reflects the weakness of their arguments if this is all they can muster.

This is Texas, remember.

This is great!

> Educating men on the potential pitfalls of vasectomys and viagra use
> Encouraging better use of mens libidinal energy
This is all in line with religious doctrine. It is also what got white men to the moon while Shuan Kings parent were crying about the fact that his mother just shat out another useless mouth to feed because his father was a simple minded ape that needed to put his dick somewhere in a hurry.

What a fucking waste of resources

...

There is no equivalence between murder and abortion in the first and second trimester.

Reminder that Texas is a christfag heaven.

It won't fucking happen at this rate the state has been acting.

Don't fap on
the electric fence

Yeah, resources.

We need those legislators to keep mining those laws, and chopping down those regulation trees. This clearly took billions of dollars to submit to their state legislature.

its salty cunts who think masturbation is like abortion

You say that, but remember that Houston has elected a lesbian mayor three or four times in a row. Passed the trans bathroom bill, and now has recognizes gay marriage.

So, it's basically the same as everywhere else.

>The fines will benefit children in the care of the Department of Family and Protective Services

masturbate for the chillins!

>Rep Jessica Farrar

These people are fucking retarded feminists who are trying to make a point on abortion.

"my body my choice xDD"

They're literally comparing a zygote to a sperm, even through a sperm alone is not a life, but the fusion of a ovum and sperm is

Morons

And there is no equivalence between *sucessful* murder and attempted murder either.

Yet the latter is still a crime.

Really exercises excogiation, does it not?

She looks like an unregulated vaginal emission.

So Texas politicians are too stupid to know the difference between blowing a load and aborting a child?
False equivalence much?

Absolute nonsense. But I doubt we will come to an agreement no matter how much we shout at each other.

How about this. Activists always defend abortion by claiming that attacks on Planned Parenthood decrease access to women's health services that are unrelated to abortion. Why is it, then, that legislators are not working to separate those health services from abortion services? Why do they remain bundled together under the same agency? The government SHOULD provide access to health programs for women and mothers, but abortion services should be a separate thing, left up to the states.

Just ban porn.

>These people are fucking retarded feminists who are trying to make a point on abortion.

What's even worse is that they are becoming even more draconian than their opposition.

They are becoming everything that they hate in the world.

But, of course, it's ok when they do it.

What scientific basis do you have for saying a sperm is not alive, yet a zygote is?

Both are organic, have DNA, interact with their environment, and have metabolic processes.

That would make too much sense, though.

Laws that effect my life are bad!
Laws that effect the lives of others don't matter!
Every time you fap, you're killing millions of babies. How does it feel being a baby murderer?

Sure there is. There is equivalence in intent.

24/7 body cam. if it ever get turned off you get put on the wall and shot.

>Democratic stronghold votes in favor left ideas because muh need to associate with others leftist.

>Bathroom Bill
It has been alter and impossible to enforce. Its going the way of prohibition. You are talking about a State Senate and House that fucking hate each other. The senate just recently excessively voted against the voucher bill that the Senate approved of.

>Recognizes Gay Marriage
The state was forced too by the federal

It won't pass the House nor the Senate due to being Republican control and it being highly controversial.

Sperm does not, in and of itself, create cellular divison, respiration, or any of the other processes of life, you gigantically pathetic imbecile.

I believe what he is saying is that genetically a spermatozoa is not a human life, as it only have half a genome - and therefore is not a 'human life'.

I guess the other side of the argument would be saying that every period is the equivalent of an abortion because the ovum is expelled from the body.

Women need to fuck off

>Never working 18 hours a day 6 days a week in a legislation textile factory
>Not knowing the back breaking labor of bearing jurisprudence till the blisters on your palms pop

Must be nice to have your kind of privilege.