>but I still find myself addicted to behaviors that contradict Jesus Christ's teachings (I.e. masterbation, stealing) the closer and closer I get to god, the more and more I start to hate myself for these things, but I am still unable to stop, the addiction is so strong and all I want to do is kill that part of me.
All men who have ever and will ever live shall in one way or another be addicted to some form of sin. You should not ever hate yourself: God has infinite and unconditional love for you, what He loves you have no right to hate. Hate your sins of course, but never the sinner.
As for such addiction, if I may offer some advice I recived from a priest years ago about the very same addictions: When you are tempted by the Enemy, do not let yourself fall into his traps. Instead, go and do Christ's work whenever you feel the temptation, go do acts of charity, read the bible, pray, go to mass, reflect and meditate on God and the Faith, do anything to get your mind off the temptation. Then slowly but surely, you shall destroy the addiction, and in its place build a new addiction to service of God, and in time you shall grow in knowledge and virtue, you shall come to be a great servent of God and shall be able to minister to others, to call them out of their sins and to Christ. Thus, a saint shall be made from a sinner, from the depths of sin you shall rise to heavenly grace.
Always remember, a good portion of the saints, perhaps even most of them, began life as rather horrible sinful men, until Christ reached into their heart and called them.
As for being saved, if you're trying to do good, believe in God and are truly repentent, and do all you can to break addiction, I would imagine God would let you enter into His Kingdom. I'm not God, so I can't say for certain, but you sound as if you're trying to do your best.
