Why haven't you taken the Coding Cyanide pill?

For one, programming is an incredibly degrading job that offers 0 job security and is the vocation most plagued by ageism by a far margin. You are not respected at any normal company. Every day, some Alpha who probably does nothing at his job except get his secretary to suck his dick in his corner office cucks you into doing random bitch work, and then yells at you when it's not done by the deadline despite it being impossible to complete the work requested. Not only that, the code rarely works, your co-workers are Indians brought in by Tata Consultancy who will replace you for half the salary and you have to train them to get your $500 severence, and the work never, ever ends. You pollute your body with the caffeinenated jew, deprive it of sleep, and let it rot while you sit the majority of the day, neglecting any healthy exercise, social interaction or life goal attainment.

It's like a postal worker, but coupled with feelings of loneliness, helplessness and total hopelessness. Programmers are too depressed to go postal, a sad state of affairs. After dentists, programmers have the highest rates of mental disorders, especially depression and suicide.

It gets worse. Women, when they hear you are a programmer, instantly reject you. It is far better to tell a woman you are on welfare than to out yourself as a computer programmer. It's highly embarrassing for a woman to associate with a programmer, as everyone knows they are the grown up version of the hopeless virgin in high school. One who never really grew up and became normal and fit into society, but rather found an environment where he could escape the reality of his situation and be invisible, able to hide the toxic shame and utter humiliation that is the programmer.

Programming's father, Alan Turing, killed himself with cyanide because he was a programmer. Programmers, why haven't you taken the cyanide pill and quit programming and turned to a respectable and productive profession to better society?

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>quit programming and turned to a respectable and productive profession to better society?

just quit your job

delete my comment too

As a software engineer I find that my choice of profession is a real stumbling block when it comes to trying to ask a girl out on date. Usually the obvious question of “What do you do for a living?” comes up when I am trying to chat a girl up and I of course answer that I am software engineer. That is when I usually find the conversation takes a turn and all her body language and actions will say “I have no interested you now”.

>I have found that I usually get a much more positive response if I say I am unemployed and sitting on the dole. Personally it is quite hurtful to know that you stand a better chance of getting a date by lying and degrading yourself by pretending to be an unemployable bum rather than a highly educated professional.

All this projection.

You must have been one sub-par code monkey who was subjected to sitting in a back room and never participate in meetings.

You think Chad's didn't like programming. I'm a Chad who likes programming and I work as a game developer. Women don't view the career as being lame. Know why? It brings in 6-figure salaries.

It has nothing to do with your job, but everything to do with the person in the position. How you present yourself, how you hold yourself up, how you operate, all falls on YOU, OP.

Here's your (You). You're a faggot.

see

Lol

> See this anecdotal evidence I copy-pasted from one loser on a forum

Like I give one shit about your "evidence" to the contrary.

I'm a living breathing example of the contrary to YOUR assertion that programmers are eternal virgins. I lost my virginity in high school, I went to prom every year, and I spent many hours in the computer lab making video games for fun. I play varsity sports all 4 years and was reasonably popular.

You on the other hand, are the typical beta faggot who believes the world should look after you. The world doesn't owe you shit. You owe yourself EVERYTHING. Where you are is the product of your OWN actions.

So...where are you now? Reflect on that. That is the image you have been living. Fix it if you will, but you are the captain of your own ship. Shape up or be a faggot forever.

literal Axe ad aimed at equating coders with worthless losers

>one pussies self anecdote speaks for everyone
k

Women won't understand your work, exactly as it should be.

Besides, when a woman ask what you do, flirt instead and tell her something obviously ridiculous and fake (eg: "repair zippo & disposable lighters")

She's probably some waiter / hr gal, who gaf

worked at a fortune 500 company for programming that did a lot of statistics work and can attest to that. my bosses boss had his son working there who was a college dropout moron and no one gives a fuck. they brought in indians during a migration stage who would constantly clog our time in conference calls about making hashmaps with billions of keys and all this bs that's not even possible and wouldn't take no for an answer, it's like you have to teach these guys what they're supposed to know. finally left bc i got a project that was possible to do but my boss refused to go along with my ideas and just tried to make it more work than required and less efficient, they just don't care so it's hard to work with people like that. corporate culture is also the worst. i work for my dad now and get paid about the same, and i don't have as much bs in my life. feels good to leave software industry.

prove you're not a POO about to be shipped back now that Trump killed your H1B

Ex Software engineer here, money was decent but I hate to work from 9 to 19-21. I get it, I have to do overtime because of feature, bugs and new releases and if not I get easy replaced. Anyway, I quit the job and work now as HR assistant in another company. Money isn't much but work life balance is pretty good.

raging POO detected

Oh look, a beta faggot friend to back up and corroborate the story. Sorry, pal. You are too nice. Sometimes you actually have to play dirty in order to win.

When you deal with businessmen, you have to understand they honor bold actions to plain reason. Programmers are taught to prefer logic and reason to all else because the languages demand it, and being your livelihood, you go along with it.

You should have started to break out of your miserable little shell where you hang out with other beta programming faggots. Sometimes you have to make friends with the enemy to see how they operate.

Sucks to be you, I guess. Just like OP. Faggots forever.

i'm a level 73 in my dating sim and a certified wizard at pickup. listen up chump.

she's not asking for legit information, but for emotions. she's just trying to vibe with you and you blurt out "engineer" which is not fun or flirty or anything you want her to be feeling. tell her you're a model or dancer or some stupid shit. there's time enough for legit info, but the inital meetup ain't it.

refactor yo pickup skills dawg.

>Sorry, pal. You are too nice. Sometimes you actually have to play dirty in order to win.
100% Poo in the Loo detected

You fucking lie, steal and start rumours to fuck over your own co-workers and take shit wages so you don't have to go back to India

you sound like a goddamn communist

Typical little faggots.

If not me, you're a poo because I couldn't make myself more useful than a fucking INDIAN LAZY SHIT.

They have SHIT code, you fuck heads. If you can't compete against them, you should just understand your job was useless to begin with. You should have tried to make yourself look better before the outsourcing began.

But oh no! Nothing is a competition in the world! We aren't all trying to carve out our little piece of it! No. Peace and love! Everyone follows that doctrine. They'll play by the rules just like me. Won't cut corners to expedite production time. No...they'll make sure they do an upstanding job by double and triple checking their work.

Just like Pajeet that took your fucking useless code-monkey job.

You schucks are gullible little fucks. All production code is riddled with shit. Once the product is out and making money, you can go back and fix that shit code. But you know what the most important part of programming is? GETTING THE FUCKING PRODUCT OUT THE DOOR AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. Period.

Learn that lesson, faggots.

nobodies going to control my life. i knew that's what they wanted, i'm not going to give them that. i have better opportunities and will prolly be making more money soon than i could at that company. it's more beta to be one of those fags in my opinion... just bc your a fucking boss at company doesn't mean shit, you're a fucking tool to someone, and his son was a fucking leech to it. not going to sell my soul to gain nothing and let some shitheads abuse me. they're the ones that lost out and you do realize that the ones that do that are going to be the shitheads just like my boss and will continue to fail unless they realize they can't just be a bunch of fags running the show and the employee is going to have to come up with ideas and not be a puppet. only a fag would be a 9-5 puppet for a company like that.

...

my boss said we use indians bc they're cheap and don't have the same labor laws as us, not bc they're anyway comparable. you do realize it's not about competing it's about finding a way to abuse people and puppet them around

thefuck

where is this from? is this real?

You can't even code, Pajeet Streetshitter Loo

If you can, declare a string using pointers in C

youtube.com/watch?v=2CazusmLn3A

>Not knowing Indians are public street shitters
>2017
pick one

>literal Axe ad aimed at equating coders with worthless losers
To be fair, Object-Oriented is the actual bottom tier of cancer programmers. I want to ask the creators of that ad if they even know what a functor is.

char *strPtr;
char str[] = "wot";
strPtr = str;

A FUCKING LEAF

Here's your proof you beta fuck.

char[] youreafaggot = "Hey faggot, nice to know you";

Then you can access it with a pointer just the same as arrays are just contiguous bytes of memory at a certain address. Have the address of the array and know what it holds? Well use a simple fucking sizeof(...) call multiplied by the size and you get it with a pointer. Stop being a pedantic cunt.

>char[] youreafaggot = "Hey faggot, nice to know you";

if you wouldn't have taken 10 minutes we would have known you didn't look that up

Let this be a lesson to all who believe faggots on this board.

They are LYING to you because they loath their own self-image.

Be a strong independent MAN, not a sniveling little faggot like OP and his friends. There are actual programmers who get laid all the time. These miserable schmucks don't know how to talk to women and probably have zero personality.

Looks fake Pajeet

21:34
>21:47

13 minutes to upload a picture

>char[] youreafaggot
m8 u do realize it's char youreafaggot[], you just got a syntax error nice one

The hard truth

> omg he didn't use the way I wanted him to!

You realize a character array is literally just a pointer to the first index in to the array correct? Are you that fucking new to programming you can't comprehend I did what you asked?

Yeah, well I have issues with my phone being detected on my shit work laptop. Too bad for you.

Oh no sue me!

Have a nice life, schmucks.

I currently work with Objective-C and Swift with a dabbling of C++ when necessary.

You guys seem to have troubles finding stable work yet you berate syntax errors without a compiler.

That is why you are schmucks.

Your autism prevents you from seeing the problem here: you have autism and can't let minor mistakes go.

Every modern compiler would catch that and it would be fixed because it couldn't compile.

The bold-faced lie.

Be a man, or be a faggot. Your choice.

>I'm a Chad who likes programming and I work as a game developer.

You're no Chad, you're a full on cuck if you are a game dev and EVERY game to come out in the last 10 years is evidence of your cuckery you fucking numale faggot.

not to mention not knowing what char** means

I'm a personal trainer. It's a pretty comfy gig. I make my own hours and work part time making a decent amount

The part about women not respecting programmers is dumb in today's world. Maybe if you actually look like a fucking nerd, sure, but then it doesn't matter what you do.

Since you got the first one wrong, let's try a second easy one

Which one is faster, Bubble Sort or Merge Sort? What are the runtimes (worst case) for each, assuming input N? Best case? Average case?

Lol, you realize game development isn't just AAA games right?

There is also digital slot machine games for one. There is also working for yourself or a small group of friends. But you wouldn't understand the first thing about being independent.

> not knowing what a double pointer means

Oh man! You got me. Double the indirection! I couldn't imagine how complicated a 2D array could be until you pointed it out.

All you're doing is stroking your own ego by pointing out nuanced issues with an uncompiled bit of code. Enjoy the proof all you'd like.

You're still living a miserable life where you need to come on to Sup Forums and spout lies about programming.

Grow a pair

he's just trolling... he didn't even make a point. sure there's some programmers that are doing fine with women, i know them. my point was that bosses need to fuck off and give them their zone to do their ideas and stop being puppetmasters. there's so much shit wrong with our systems bc of the way it's handled and could be easily fixed if they weren't evil greedy fucks.

dude just say book keeper lol

i said book keeper a while ago and fucked a hot ass babe for two years

TCS/infosys etc employees are not programmers by education . They just took the job because no one else hired them from campus. TCS makes them work like slaves too

What are you trying to prove here? Nobody cares who you are. Sounds like you're trying to convince yourself more than anything.

I don't think that was the reason Turing killed himself for

clearly. i've never seen anyone project this hard

> Bubble sort

Worst case: n^2
Best: n
Avg: n^2

> Merge

Worst: nlogn
Best: nlogn
Avg: nlogn

Merge sort. Never bubble unless you have a trivial amount of data and you need to finish whatever it is you're working on quickly and come back to it later.

Employ a strategy pattern to change the way you sort the array so you can come back at a later time if you want to be pedantic and use white-board questions

he was gay and they made him take chemical castration. only part where op is wrong

Arrays are pointers you eternal faggot

i took 2 programming classes in college

first was honestly pretty fun, second was taught by a chink who could barery speak engrish and made me completely lose all interest

>programmer
>not self-employed

prove merge is nlogn

When you use anecdotal evidence that is just that...anecdotal, don't be butthurt someone comes along and smashes your little bubble.

You just can't make it happen with the ladies. Period.

Deal with it.

obviously but you declared it with a syntax error

I'm done with the hilarious interview.

You've got your proof I'm no poo-in-loo.

You have to prove you aren't a pussy faggot who is nothing more than a vessel that produces code for your managers, to be cast off when someone cheaper and more efficient comes along.

holy shit you have a reading problem don't you

If this cuck was any good he'd be able to prove P=NP

How isn't it that you can pick a fight with a fake programmer dork and still look like a bigger asshole? I guess that is the mystic power of the freedom attic dweller.

because you can google stuff? that proves anything?

More cool tips!

What profession should I do instead, leaf?

Yeah bro I'm sure you're smashing like nothing. That's what guys who have nothing to prove do, they come on 4chins and tell everyone how cool they are irl

> b-b-but the syntax error!

Oh my god! If I had left it like that then it still wouldn't compile and then I go change it in less than a second and no headaches. Still done faster than you, and I'm managing more conversations on this board. Sadly it's been overrun by faggots like you.

Go die in a hole roodypoo

don't believe in reality eh?

The fastest sort is whatever is in the libraries you're using. You're paid to produce products which means benchmarking comes later, if at all.

Awesome. Out in the fresh air, at the beach. With your buddy. Taking a dump.

...

Oh man, you're right. I didn't just come home from the bar playing pool with my friend who is about to be married.

No. That didn't happen.

I don't have a life. I'm not also on vacation right now.

Chads only party, eternally. With no life outside of it.

Look in the mirror and see what you want. Just know, the life you live now is one of lies where you keep telling yourself it's the world that's the problem. If you want to be happy, you have to take matters in to your own hands.

Wanna know a little tip, nepotism will help you.

If you have friends at a company, get them to help you apply to the openings at their company. It's how the real world works, not your disillusioned "world"

>It's like a postal worker

Postal is better than that but you max out at ~65k plus possible overtime, unless you go into management then it's into 6 figures. There's moderate to intense exercise involved and depending on what you do you could be outside on your own all day and no one ever bothers you. The thing with postal work is the level of people applying has degraded, so you just have to not be a nigger and you're all of a sudden a tip-top employee. It's really easy to get into and impossible to be fired once you're career (~2 years in)

>Programming's father, Alan Turing, killed himself with cyanide because he was a programmer.
Nice try leaf, but it was because he was a faggot.

Nah man just return them a presorted array. It's an "alternative sort"

He doesn't understand production time is king with development.

He's a recent college graduate that needed to learn the "theory" behind programming before touching a computer. Then he'll go back to his textbook teachings because that's all he relies on to validate his work.

you're on Sup Forums while on vacation. we'll i think that's all we needed to hear. cya roody!

Sounds like you're in the manic stage

So we're not going to open up the tinfoil alternative here, that he was whacked?

damn I love this copypasta

post the rest

Topkek. I used to say "skydiving instructor" even though I only jumped twice. I also bought a cheap, old motorbike that just looked nice so when they asked what car I drove, I said "sportsbike". I pulled in all the time despite being an admin bitch in a company full of ageing, childless women with a two wheeled toaster that barely worked.

Poor you guys.

I'd love to know what your self-image must be like. Honestly, I would.

Did you ever play sports? Go outside once?

I'm on vacation. Which means I can do whatever the fuck I want. If that means shit posting to a bunch of faggots online for a few hours, then so be it. This place brings me many laughs when I've been drinking and smoking.

>coding
>not networking

The Putin Sort

Fuck Computer Science/Software Engineering, ECE is where it's at

No worries, if minecraft can make millions, I'm sure you can think of something.

> Being a glorified IT specialist who manages servers by sitting in a dark area that is cold waiting for something to happen

Yeah, I'd rather develop SDK's and tools development teams use to produce products. That's where the real money is in programming. Building the tools other developers use to make their software.

it was easier to convince him to literally kys

>Job stealing Pajeet cucking triggered whiteboi script monkies
My God, what a time to be alive!

You sound like you're about 21 years old

At O(1) it's one of the MOST efficient sorting algorithm of all times.

at least you admit you're trollin

Older and been working in the industry longer than you.

Too bad your image of me is off.

Fucking Genius. You're hired. Do you want your $800K salary all cash or some stock options?

I'm a computer science student (huge nerd) but I have quite a lot of sex at university. If you actually believe that labelling yourself as a "programmer" will turn women off, you're a degenerate. You gotta own yourself, if people don't like you, eh, their loss (assuming you're not a piece of shit). It also helps that I'm a 6'4 aryan, dress nicely, and have good people skills.

t. web dev

Oh I'm not trolling. I'm just shitposting in your shit thread because it's a bunch of bullshit.

I am a game developer. I've worked in the industry probably longer than you have. I understand it better than you, and I also have more charisma than you.

You come on to a board about politics bitching about women not liking you because you're a programmer. Then you try to call me pajeet because you can't physically comprehend there are white people who enjoy sports, outdoors, AND programming.

Sucks to be you. You know what the usual response from the receptionists at conferences is?

"Oh you aren't the usual programming type."

I think you should place all the $800k as an angel seed for my start up. It's basically AirBnB, but for taxis.

sure there's plenty of bad programmers who have sex

>impossible to complete the work requested
>replaced by injuns

You deserve to be replaced by people who suck for cheaper. You clearly suck.

>be programmer
>I am top 2% pay for my age range
>do r&d

How does it feel to be mediocre?