How redpilled are MRE's?

Styx666 is always eating this shit. is there some reason?

Please get a hobby and don't ever make a post this fucking stupid again. Fuck off.

STYX UPLOAD TO SOUNDCLOUD YOU STUPID BITCH!!!

meal ready to eat
pure laziness in a bag
like ramen but a full meal

it's a shit ton of bad calories because combat is exhausting and stressful

t. former Marine

Most people are curious about military shit. MREs taste like ass and there are better, cheaper, and longer lasting options on the civilian market.

MREs are good nutrition, but you have to understand that they're combat rations.

The upshot of that is first and foremost that they have a massive amount of calories. Like 1500-2000 each. A normal person should be eating that much a day, so imagine what eating three meals like that every day will do to your body. It's fine for soldiers, because they're so physically active anyway that they need those extra calories. But you'll get fat living on MREs and not exercizing.

The other thing about them is that they are designed to block up your digestion. In other words, if you live on nothing but MREs for two or three days, you'll only have one painful bowel movement a day. If you keep on like that for a week or more, you'll eventually stop having bowel movements.

That's right. You stop all together.

Then the next time you eat anything a little bit greasy- WATCH OUT! Because once you lube that up, you unstopper the cork, so to speak. Military professionals refer to this as "rocket shits."

But aside from that, they're actually pretty healthy, well balanced meals that don't taste horrible (most of them). They're some of the most heavily engineered and processed food in all of history, but the government spends loads of money making them nutritious and palatable. They're also not terribly expensive. I was just at the PX where a case of 12 was going for about $110. There's far more expensive prepared meals you can get for that price. It's good camping food, if you're into that. Or backpacking. I like to keep a few in my truck just in case I'm ever like snowed in or something and have to choose between cannibalism and survival.

Those look like they lack fiber and would tear your asshole up. Why eat that shit when you have real food available?

this.

It's mostly sugar and anti-laxatives to stop you shitting

ask steve

>Styx666 is always eating this shit
never would of guessed

>dont eat the gum its a laxative and will make you shit
-DI (lying)

>an MRE tastes like shit but ensure your survival

>marrying a white woman and having children will probably be a shitty life but will ensure the survival of the white race

MRE=extremely redpilled

nice

Why eat this garbage when i can go to Dairy Queen or some shit?

They are full of a ton of preservatives.
Do not eat those unless you exercise constantly. They are an entire days worth of calories. Unless of course you don't have the calorie intake of their intended consumers, soldiers who march miles with 70 pound backpacks.

Don't know who styxx666 is, but the only reason would be either for nostalgia if he is a veteran, flavor prefrence (if he doesn't mind horrifying amounts of preservatives), or he's trying to be cool by eating military food most military men fucking hate.

Haha that's a good one.

He's an autist and it comes in those neat little bags. And the bags are inside bags.

What's with the not shitting thing? Just to save time when on mission?

Anyone here tried Infowars Life Select?
Water filter man almost has me convinced I should spend money on that stuff.

Depends on the MRE

Southwest beef & black beans is the shit. The pound cakes are good. Soggy grape jelly + PB + those dry ass crackers made a decent PB&J.
Oh and those powdered drinks were great when you were used to shitty lukewarm water all the time.

They're designed to be eaten in situations where you don't have access to real food and don't have the convenience to plan a comfortable shit. Nothing wrong with wanting to try it, but even fast food is arguably more nutritious.

The Russian MRE's are wholesome and delicious
Steve got me addicted to them
No HFC or weird food dyes
Their fruit drinks are amazing

cancer in a bag designed solely to keep soldiers from starving when the supply lines are cut/they are beyond the stable supply lines. id hate to have to eat that stuff for longer that a week, but it beats starving and becoming exhausted in the middle of a warzone

Careful, their shelf life is shit. In a hot car they expire after a month and on average last 3 years, 5 with perfect storage. Grab a good freeze dried food.

Every time I watch his videos I get vibes the he's popping a boner with the things he smells

>he hasn't seen Steve1989MREinfo
>hasn't watch a man enjoy 70 year old nazi cigs and chocolate
pleb

Yeah, because shitting on a mission is a liability. But it's more than that.

See, when people die they void their bowels. When you see your buddy die and you have to carry his body away, that's already traumatic enough. To add to that the indignity of his shit all over everything just makes it worse.

*INHALESSSSS smell from box* sorry guys just had to take a moment to reeeeeeeallly appreciate these

Bullshit. You can eat them after decades. Those things never fucking expire.

The omelets were like bouncy balls, the snack bread was like a compressed bread loaf, and these packages even include a nastier no-name brand cheese sauce. MREs were shit in cadets, but I believe our general forces get pretty nice ones.

Has anyone had the pizza MRE? I got out right when they were new, but I never saw one.

He ate hard tack from the civil war once
He's had botulism poisoning once for sure
That's why he wears the mask now

I love steve1989mreinfo

Great youtube channel, i usually watch it late late at night if i dont have anything else to watch or when im super stoned

Nice hiss!

I've had a few and never stopped me shitting. Aussie ones wouldn't either.

It did make it a unique shit though. Weird when the whole platoon has the same shit smell and look, but it makes sharing one hole less disturbing.

it makes your dick grow

>I've had a few
That's the thing. You eat nothing but MREs for a week or two, and you will stop shitting.

>tfw no norse qt3.14 to snu snu

They're not even real food, plus they stop you shitting. Which is useful for a day but then you just end up filling awful.

I think this is the main reason MREs are so appealing.

d'oh

They give you some fierce constipation. Maybe he's a masochist now.

It's canned food, it's nothing special, other than the packaging and the heater sleeve.

IMHO, you'd do better with a small campstove in your pack and a bunch of Mountain House pouches.

Those MREs are heavy.

Yes, he's full of shit.
Like in the literal sense.
Probably sees using a toliet as beneath him, eating an inconvenience and all.

sage this is truly not Sup Forums
fuck that kike mystikus hocus pocus

I ate them all the time for a kid.

>14 year old me hiding in the woods with some Mexican rice bean MRE and airport gun.
>while prepping it got the warming chemical in food, eat mre anyways because I'm a fucking soldier.
>tummy feels warm cant shit for 5 days.

If you enjoy turning your stomach into a cement mixer, having to deliver a godamn brick of a food baby that blows capillary blood vessels in your eyes as you grunt and prolapse your asshole once every 8 days, sure! Go for it!

Yeah doesn't happen on the aussie or kiwi rations, but I've only ever traded for MREs.

Tried to bring home several boxes once, but the retarded ass airforce didn't want them on the plane due to the heaters. How do they think they got there in the first place? Dumb ass airmen.

Tried french rations, they're interesting. Things like ostrich meat, liver pate

>warming chemical in food
You know what it is, right?

Magnesium oxide and iron oxide (rust). That's it. You'll be fine.

This. Also, it tastes bad most of the time.

only if you push to pass a potato food baby through your arse

SALT
O
D
I
U
M

want to push*

jesus what happened

If I would've known how expensive these are in normie world, I would have snagged a few cases while I was USMC. Literally pallets sitting around.

gud goy,spend more

he looks like he weights about 130 pounds soaking wet, something's not adding up

Also keep in mind that an MRE presupposes a source of potable water that's easy to get to. You can still eat one without any water but you'll have to eat it cold and you won't have anything to drink.

>wanting to eat MREs

steer clear, you fucking queer.
MREs are not good and MREs are not fun.

You have the choice to eat what you want, but by god dont make that choice a fucking MRE.
I'd honestly rather eat pub food while I'm in the UK than eating MREs if we ever end up with supply issues.
I'd go back to Afghan and eat their fucking "local crops" than eating more MREs

DONT
DO
IT

I unironically like the cardboard bread that comes with them.

Yeah, the chair force is full of retards. The only thing that's mildly dangerous about the FRHs is that they produce Hydrogen gas through electrolysis of the tiny amount of water you put in there. That's almost entirely harmless, unless you have like a thousand guys inside a tiny building popping them all off at once. Then you might get enough gas to start a fire.

You should try the Italian rations. They get issued little plastic bottles of wine. Save up a couple days' worth and you could get fucked up.

Some people do that - and sell bootleg MREs on Ebay.

>Decadent

Ate one during an exercise once. I could only eat half of it. So much fucking food.

>Styx666 is always eating this shit. is there some reason?

Because he is a living embodiment of autism.

Nice!

>being so retarded you can't properly cook one of those
Deserved it baka desu senpai.

>voluntarily eating mres

You guys need hobbies

If you have to eat them, the kosher/halal are way better. Vegetarian ones are worse than regular though.

military user here, they're pretty bad for you if you eat them everyday. I ate them twice a day for a while and it took its toll in my bowels. I usually ate the vegetarian ones because the kosher was literal dog-shit

Since you describe it like that,
I'm gonna have to try one now. Not eating for a entire day better be worth it dammit.

It's just ASMR porn. Don't take it seriously.

Salsa plox

>Meals
>Refusing to
>Exit

Yeah we had a guy who ate local food all the time over there. Didn't take a solid shit for 3 months. His asshole chapped up and he got asshole fissures from it when he finally stopped pissing out his ass and a big ole MRE turd savaged his hole.

I had a crazy uncle (had is used loosely, as I don't know if hes still out there) who lived off MREs and occasional game in a trailer in the middle of the woods.

Last I heard he was camping out somewhere off the land in Alaska

Sauce

dunno, just look it up its on reality kings

true patriot.

>And the bags are inside bags.
What an insidious trap for autists

>My
>Rectum's
>Exterminator
There's no way on God's green earth that I would subject myself to MRE's unless I'm going to die from hunger...

>tastes bad

What? They're fucking delicious. At least the Aussie ones are

kosher/halal is terrible, the vegetarian ones were some of the best

THIISS I hate MREs where the boxes had been sitting outside in the desert for an unknown amount of time and everything tasted like dogshit.

There are a handful of quite tasty MREs. Believe it or not, veggie burger is one of the best ones. Comes with bbq sauce and tastes fuckin great. Kept it's deliciousness a secret so I could always grab one or two when we needed to share a box

This. Burgers can't wait to trade their wife's son for one of our glorious aussie rations

>crazy uncle
was he actually crazy? Or was he smart enough to live on his own and keep the fuck away from this shit hole society?

Don't know how you guys took over the world with all the dysentery out there.

You jelly, muricans?

I always thought MREs pass really easy as long as you drink (A LOT) of water. What's all this stuff about them being intentionally hard to shit out? That doesn't seem right.

Well autists aren't eligible to serve.

They're crap. They're easily prepared and have shitloads of calories to quickly refill troops during combat. They're not a good alternative for real food, unless there's nothing else to eat.

>marrying a white woman and having children will probably be a shitty life but will ensure the survival of the white race

kek
You guys can take that one up for me

Reality kings rock hard
Girl name Phoenix marie

>made in america
lmaoooo

Nah he was fucking nuts

When he showed up or we visited him he would talk about how he went to the hollow earth and how hitler should have won the war

WW3 is happening.

When?

Now.

>made in NZ

Those cunts get basically the cheaper version from the same factory. No spoon and less menus.

haven't had pashtet in so fucking long, craving that so much

Not sure about American ones, but I had a Lithuanian one laying around, already two years past its expiration date, then I tossed into a car we travelled in through mountains, deserts and whatever the fuck else for a month, and that crap still tasted exactly the same as a fresh one, only the chocolate bar was melted from the heat. No diarrhea afterwards even.

You're lying, Piss-France. Made in Montréal.
Have some delicious pain hamburger

>how you want your mre's brudda?
>just fuck my shit up

bread,lard,salt and water is based, that fancy shit is for american """"soldiers""""

The PBJ and pound cakes are really good. I liked the spaghetti one though.