>Year 2018
>Spacex is ready to launch its first consumer low orbit flight for space tourism
>Elon turns to Amber and tells her that this new chapter of SpaceEx shall mark a new chapter in their relationship
>he gets on one knee
>Amber I love you will you marry me
>Amber is ecstatic, her pupils turn into dollars signs
>she says YES
>Elon stops her
>"under one condition"
>"you take the first flight into low orbit, you trust me right?"
>Amber is confused but reluctantly accepts
>Elon straps her into the harness and kisses her forehead "I love you babe"
>The count down begins
>5...4...3...2...1..
>Blast off
>The thrusters start off beautifully lift off is successful
>Amber looks into the cockpit camera "I love you Elon"
>Elons looks into his camera with strange grin on his face
>"Seems we'll have to postpone the wedding, one of my investments needs my attention"
>"BABYYY I want to get married now, which one is it?"
> A movie babe, Edward Scissor Hands 2 I loved the first one have you watched it?
>amber is visibly worried
>Elons face is now a mangled grin
>his face is 90% grin
>"Ba-abe why do you look like that"
>Johnny Depp steps out from behind Musk
>"You will always remember this as the day you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow"
>I flame shoots up the side of the rocket
>Amber screams on the monitor, fires blazing around her
>Musks face is now simply giant teeth
>The rocket is shredded into a million pieces engulfed in huge billow of flame and smoke
>Edward Scissor Hands 2 breaks box office records and solves climate change
Year 2018
Kek wills it
/approved/
...
>le kek wills it
/r/the_donald --->
Ha ha Amber is sleeping with an African American!
I don't understand.
I hope so OP
Hes dating the woman who destroyed johnny depp financially
>>Spacex is ready to launch its first consumer low orbit flight for space tourism
SpaceX said in 2006, it is 3 years away from launching astronauts to space.
It said the same thing in 2016...
cant believe this idiot would give that gold-digger a shot at his $$$. she clearly has green eyes.
Proof that being intelligent is not a pre-condition of being rich.
>2020
>The Year
>morning dew, purple hue
>Elon Musk, wearing a very conservative turtle neck, turns to Amber Heard
>"be with me"
> he drops to one knee
>"my empire .... it ... means nothing without you"
>Amber accepts the proposal and embraces Elon
>"We should celebrate, but we have nothing to drink"
>"babe would you get something I've already programmed the car to drive to the nearest store I'll prepare some food while your out"
>she parts with a kiss on his cheek
>gets into the passenger seat, biting her lips, and hugging herself supremely satisfied
>Elon pops up on the video chat in the center console
>he's pan searing kobe steaks
>"I hope you like what I'm making"
>The car is pulling up to the store now
>"I love you Elon"
>Suddenly the doors lock and the car accelerates past its destination
>The car begins speeding, weaving in and out of traffic
>Amber screams yelling at the car ai to stop and pulling on the door knobs
>"Elon how do I stop this thing!!!?"
>Elon's face is contorted a wild grin on his face only the whites of his eyes can be seen
>The car merges onto the highway
>"Destination Palo Alto Marina!" The AI drones
>"Elon stop this now"
>Elon biting his bottom lip into bloodless whiteness, grinning like Satan
>"Do you like ketchup with your steak"
>Elon squirts an entire bottle of ketchup into the pan.
>"Ketchup! Ketchup! Ketchup!"
>The car exits the highway and the docks can be seen ahead
>"PLEA...SE ELO .. ON NO..ooo.oo!!!"
>mascara running down her face her speech broken up by whimpers
>"KATCHUPPP" "KITCHUPPP"
>Musk begins punching the steaks
>The car is making its way down the docks
>Amber braces herself for impact
>"Tenderize"
>Elon's back is now facing the screen, the steak and ketchup are burning
>The car flies 200 feet through the air crashing into the ocean
>Theres flooding from every corner
>amber's tears are relentless
>A new voice is heard through the center console
>"Whats eating gilbert grape over here"
>Johnny Depp walks on to screen
>"Oh hey amber found some champagne here, you didn't have to go out of your way to get some"
>The water is now above her lips as the car sinks deeper
>"You will always remember this as the day you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow"
He's a 'pede. He's based.
you niggers need to chill the fuck out.
he's not that dumb.
do you really think you stupid motherfuckers are the only ones who read news?
he knows the story as good as we all do.
dating doesn't mean he's giving her his money.
she thinks of course that she can trick him into marriage, but he'd get a prenup.
also, he had marriage desasters already, he knows very well how this goes
>but he'd get a prenup
Prenups are a meme. Judges tear them up and laugh on a regular basis.
Would be better with an unactivated thruster altering trajectory directly toward the sun
This is the best meme since the zimzam trial
very wrong. small people maybe.
but read elon's story. he's had three marriages already and pays 0 (zero) because of prenups.
i strongly recommend reading the story his first ex wrote after the divorce, it's fucking delicious to read how that cunt fell
You can make your own.
He survived Russian Roulette 3 times. Its not proof that Russian Roulette is safe to play.
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...
>britcuckistan
nice.
totally represents the civilised world.
in that country laws mean virtually nothing. judges can play around just the way they want.
not so here in Germany, and i can imagine murrica is similar
kek
...
LE EDGY 18 YEARS OLD FIRST COOL NEXT BIG MEME NEXT BIG THING POST
LE SCREENCAP SEEKER
Kudos OP I laughed hard MY SIDES
>Not launching the rocket into an asteroid high in gold whilst "Gold Digger" plays on a continuous, high volume loop.
I though you were creative Elon.