ITT: American secrets to success

ITT: American secrets to success

Microwaving apples.

Excessive amounts of sorbitol

Penis Inspection Day during middle school P.E.

I had no idea cheese dick wasn't normal until Mr. Bronstein gave me a personal check-up.

*aspartame

Slice your apples into small wedge shapes before you dunk them in coffee. They come out warm and soaked just right. That way you won't waste time heating the whole apple up in the oven.

PB&J

*xylitol
*malitol
*acesulfame potassium
*sucralose

Dafak is this thread

some reddit thing

literally what?

jig's up
this burger outed y'all burgers

sorbitol is the best because it makes your bowels evacuate by sucking moisture into your small intestines. it lets you simulate fasting without having to give up food

Niacin and Sennheiser headphones

Russia didn't hack the fucking election.

Put your adult diaper on under your jeans instead of over them

>sucarose
>bad
It's literally sugar

>microwaving your homework

milk mixed with 7up, seriously try it.

OLDFAG HERE

DON'T FUCKING DO IT

Aerosol cheese

+ chlorine

have fun eating bleach

ahahahahahhahahaha burgers everybody

mmmmmm goes good on this

Your a sore thumb

This. Omg I used to hate penis inspection day so much, but I'm a better person for learning good penis hygiene from our gym teacher.

sucrose = glucose + fructose

all 3 are sugars. sucrose can be stored in muscle tissue but pure fructose can only help to make fat

That shit is good.

I'm getting really sick of these newfag "oldfags" who think oldfag means you're old. Get out, you stupid fuck.

Awe fuck man. Why are you letting these secrets out?!?!?!