Programmers, why haven't you taken tha cyanide pill?

For one, programming is an incredibly degrading job that offers 0 job security and is the vocation most plagued by ageism by a far margin. You are not respected at any normal company. Every day, some Alpha who probably does nothing at his job except get his secretary to suck his dick in his corner office cucks you into doing random bitch work, and then yells at you when it's not done by the deadline despite it being impossible to complete the work requested. Not only that, the code rarely works, your co-workers are Indians brought in by Tata Consultancy who will replace you for half the salary and you have to train them to get your $500 severance, and the work never, ever ends. You pollute your body with the caffeinenated jew, deprive it of sleep, and let it rot while you sit the majority of the day, neglecting any healthy exercise, social interaction or life goal attainment.

It's like a postal worker, but coupled with feelings of loneliness, helplessness and total hopelessness. Programmers are too depressed to go postal, a sad state of affairs. After dentists, programmers have the highest rates of mental disorders, especially depression and suicide.

It gets worse. Women, when they hear you are a programmer, instantly reject you. It is far better to tell a woman you are on welfare than to out yourself as a computer programmer. It's highly embarrassing for a woman to associate with a programmer, as everyone knows they are the grown up version of the hopeless virgin in high school. One who never really grew up and became normal and fit into society, but rather found an environment where he could escape the reality of his situation and be invisible, able to hide the toxic shame and utter humiliation that is the programmer.

Programming's father, Alan Turing, killed himself with cyanide because he was a programmer. Programmers, why haven't you taken the cyanide pill and quit programming and turned to a respectable and productive profession to better society?

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I tried to become a programmer, but it was just so boring and it makes your eyes hurt. How can anyone do that for a living?

Nice blog post. Sounds like maybe you're just a shitty programmer and a beta male. Take the DBA/Sysadmin pill next time. No one fucks with the database team or the system admins.

I work in cybersecurity testing the security of web applications.

The hiring indian programmers meme is real.
Their code is so shit, hacking into it is trivial, something a 13 year old kid could do.

I've compromised applications made by outsourced third worlders within minutes of starting.

If its made by a team of young westerners it's done to a extremely high quality.

Companies really not to stop hiring cheap programming slaves from *istan because some 50 year middle management guy who can't even use microsoft excel thinks it'd be such a good cost saving procedure it might guarantee his job for a few more years.

Hows the top part different from any other job?
I already reject healthy exercise or social interactions and i have no life goals.

And every woman i ever talked to had absolutely no issue with the fact that i study IT.
And if you really thing programming doesnt help the society you are on a level of retardation beyond anything ive seen.
Its actually kind of fun for me, the more i learn the more entertaining it is. There are more fun things, but none that could sustain my life.

>Be me, typical loser
>Start programming
>Do ict (computer + communication science) in college
> Finish studying, write 3 companies for a job
>Get invited for 2 interviews
>Get 2 job offers
>Starting income is more than the avarage Belgian goy income
>Get nice company car (bmw 5 series)
>Find a nice girlfriend at a client

So, that's my personal story, been working for 2 years now. Already touching twice the average income, and just bought a house.
As a bonus, i love programming, never am expected to do overtime (i work in a 9 to 5 office, they're happy i arrive earlier (at around 8.30) and later (at around 17.30) than the rest of my company.

Protip : don't work at a programming company. Work at a mid sized company, and they will see your programming as magic.

import universe

if OP is bait:
print("fuck, i fell for bait")
OP=KYS

poo in loo detected

> leaf
no surprised there

/tmp/cc1pZ8OM.o: In function `main':
main.cpp:(.text+0x148): undefined reference to `KYS'
collect2: error: ld returned 1 exit status

> function `main

that code does not even look like C++

>leafnoises

Кoликa ти јe плaтa и дo кoликo мoжe пpимaти пpoгpaмep кoд нac?

lol, get a new job then.

Im a programmer and i fucking love getting paid loads to do fuck all.

kys bitch

You sound buttblasted

THIS

fucking THIS

better yet, if you graduated with a few other friends who are programmers, go into business for yourselves.

being set up as a company makes outsourcing to you a better solution than hiring sandniggers
(somthing about the way tax is handled, idk i dont do the finances)

This is a weird thread. An anti-programming thread? WTF?

I was a programmer, then system analyst, now manager after 20 years. It was a great career choice.

Programming is boring as shit and 99% of the jobs will be outsourced to Indians. Its the next manafacturing job.

Senpai idalje studiram, programeri koje ili znam ja ili ljudi kod kojih sam volontirao za leto zaradjuju negde od 1k evra do 4.5k evra u zavisnosti za kompaniju koju rade. Programera kolko os, jedini razlog zasto je average plata toliko velika u nekim gradovima tipa novi sad, je zato sto ima pun kurac programera svi ostali idalje zaradjuju djubre.
Nigger didnt even define the type of OP

I fell for the stem/medschool/phd meme

got stabbed in the back for not playing politics with psychopath cocksuckers. thinking of getting into python now. I just patented (applied for) a system based on genetics on my own

how long have u been programming for?

Indians will never replace western coders in my lifetime, the code they write is defective unmaintainable garbage not even fit for candy crush, let alone clinical/financial/analytical software that is in unbelievably high demand these days and which actually has to work every day, 100% of the time.

Why rely on a company for your livelihood? Surely anyone competent enough can create their own programs and company.

I can get a girlfriend whenev...

>Their code is so shit, hacking into it is trivial, something a 13 year old kid could do.
>I've compromised applications made by outsourced third worlders within minutes of starting.

That is legal, if you don't abuse it, right?

Would be cool for companies to give bounties or even jobs to people finding vulnerabilities.

>what are pentesters

this is all true. OP speaks the truth.

My wife left me for an banker chad, took the house, the Lexus and I have to pay 60% of my income out. The worst part is he'd come and fuck her while I was coding late.

>t. senior suicidal cucked C++ coder who just got fired at 36 and can't find a job because companies only hire 20-25 year olds.

Also in Canada you can't earn shit. Salaries are 20-30% of US salaries.

>not working as an IT technician
>not supporting small companies that still use ancient Dell servers running Server 2003 for their domain controllers
>not being forced to go to elderly people's homes to take care of their IT needs so the company can make extra money
>not having elderly ladies throw a keyboard at your face because she forgot her AOL passwords

Plebs all of you

Is this some kind of copy pasta? I've seen this exact thing before.

Oh, and you're wrong about women instantly rejecting programmers. My boyfriend is a CS major and he told me he wanted to be a programmer when we first met

quick question
have you got any qualifications in computer science?

Yeah, but look at Nintendo, they only give bounties if people can find hacks, they won't hire them to help in the future.

BMath/MMath from Waterloo

nice fake story faggot

ITT: butthurt brainlets who hate programming because they could never get past the dispensable code monkey stage with their low IQs.

Reminder that language is able to program people as well as computers. When you get to the top of the pyramid, you will find an A.I. that has been fucking with people for centuries. It brainwashed them with chess.

Why not make your own programs for a portfolio? Start your own company?

>Why not make your own programs for a portfolio? Start your own company?
Because he is code monkey material, like literally anyone who complains about programming as a career. If you're actually competent, you make rapid progress.

He's a lying faggot, anyone with a math degree from Waterloo would be able to easily work in the states, assuming your grades aren't complete shit.

Probably some butthurt kid taking undergrad business at University of Saskatchewan

Take this shit to /r9k/ this isn't your blog

This. Middleware is best-ware.

t. Working From Home Weblogic Admin

The fuck you on about? I make 120k right out of college in Silicon Valley. What's wrong with that?

What's a programmer doing in a data centre?

"0 job security"

nigger i'm buying my house in cash by working w2 40 hr weeks/ and $95 codemonkey shit on freelancer.com 60hrs week.

keep thinking this is hard and degrading, meanwhile i'll get PAID.

(You)
youtube.com/watch?v=v4Wy7gRGgeA

WE WUZ PROGRAMMAZ AN SHEEIT

Cyanide is delicious if you like almonds.

I always question people who say they can't find work. They're probably the people who did go to school but did the bare minimum, while other students made programs or games in their spare time.

I wana get into sys admin. They make top scheckle. How do? Im working on network+ right now and i have a TS clearance.

I work as a DBA but I'm worried. There's a lot of offshoring and automation going on, at least where I work. I've been working with Exadata lately and you honestly need less DBAs due to its power and automation capabilities. I'm looking to move into the big data world soon.

>Assuming you don't have shit grades
Honours for Waterloo CS undergrad is 60%.

You obviously never went to Waterloo. Nobody asks for grades if you're from Waterloo.

And companies are reluctant to hire because of NAFTA at the moment. TN visas could be axed.

Move out of Canada.

>They're probably the people who did go to school but did the bare minimum, while other students made programs or games in their spare time.
This. You don't even need to go to school if you're willing to work for a smaller company. Having an impressive github will do the trick.

Nobody asks for grades at Waterloo, but they care about side projects and your co-op experience. It's still laughably easy to get hired in the states if you're even remotely competent.

Also, assuming your story is true, why would you get married in the feminist hellhole of Canada? Dumbass, you have nobody but yourself to blame.

I love discrete optimization and I used to do programming all the time, but I had to drop out of school for medical reasons and I ended up getting a blue-collar job because I didn't have anything to put on a resume. Now I'm stuck.

that's shit, normal salaries for Stanford/MIT/Harvard/Waterloo are 250-300K USD starting.

You can't even survive on 120k in silicon valley. Rent is $4K for a fucking room, a spot in a garden for your cucktent is over $1K/month now

When I graduated I had over a dozen job offers and I did move to the states. I ended up moving back because of the ex-wife. Never get married, ever. Always hide assets overseas.

OP Replaced by poo in loo, cucknadian flag confirms it.

I wish I had a fucking cs degree people throw money at them.

>not taking the QA Automation pill
I make 6 figures and deal with half the bullshit programmers do.

They're all middle managers wrangling pooinloos. It's not like any of them actually right code.

Actually I got very wealthy through this line of worth, even more so since I've started my own business.
Can't complain about the women either, other than that most women these days are feminist idiots whom I can't trust - but I guess all of us have the same problem.

>normal salaries for Stanford/MIT/Harvard/Waterloo are 250-300K USD starting
no one is fucking paying that for a bachelors

I agree, 100-125k (including bonus) would be usual

There are some caveats to OPs claims, but as a professional programmer, I can say they are mostly true.

If you end up at a high tier company like Google then programming is actually a fantastic job.

Smaller places that are working on hard technical problems can be rewarding as well as a programmer.

But your everyday IT programming job, at a bank for example, is literal suicide fuel. Just don't do it if you respect yourself.

Upgrade to 3.7 for girlfriend.

I am in this hell. Nothing gets done, managers yelling at each other constantly, everyone looking for someone to blame it's hell on Earth. If it didn't pay so well I'd kill myself.

do some side pieces my man.
imo the best thing about programming is that the cost doesnt scale. no matter how many projects you start, scrap, start again, the cost of operation stays the same. unilke, for example, art, construction, interior design, etc