We know how difficult it is to have us in your life. We know how hard it is to hear us in our depths of despair. We know how we may come across as manipulative, controlling, unwilling to change, attention-seeking, even intolerable. We know. But step back for a moment, really look at us. Inside, you will find the most compassionate, empathetic, kind, giving people you will meet. Yes, you are tired of the chaos– as tired as you are, we are drained, worn down. Yes, you feel trapped by the relationship, as trapped as you feel we are birds banging our heads against the cage wanting to fly. I implore you, do not tell us we do nothing to improve, we have been seeking help most of our lives, we have been fighting to get “normal” forever. We have been actually getting up every morning, this in itself is comparable to climbing Mount Everest, this is “doing something.” (continued)
Dear Non-BPD People
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We are not about control, manipulation, lies, we are about fear. We love you, possibly more than most people can feel love and are in sheer terror of losing you, this is the control you speak of. Don’t turn your back on us (unless you are in danger of your life, but most BPD’s I have met hurt only themselves). For when you turn your back on us, you have reinforced the idea that we are unworthy, hopeless, and cannot make it in this world. In my experience, most of the conflicts that arise with BPD’s and Non-BPD’s is miscomunication. Be clear about what you mean, extremely clear, because what you say is perceived by us as something different. Be reassuring. Don’t say, “I can’t take this right now,” simply start the sentence differently… “You have every right to feel the way you do, but can we talk later. I will call you back at such and such a time.” (continued)
Be validating. Don’t ignore a text or a phone call, we have been ignored all our lives and feel invisible. Don’t tell others that we are “crazy.” We are a lot healthier than most people walking around ignoring their feelings, we are learning how to cope. Don’t tell us we are being overly dramatic, overly sensitive, we are not dramatic, our feelings are real and yes, we are overly senstitive, but is that such a bad thing? I am proud to say that I am sensitive, I am proud to say that when I love, I love with all my soul, I am proud to say that I do understand you, but can you even try to understand me? I am not here preaching about how BPD’s should be catered to. As an analogy: if we had cancer, would you say “I’m tired of taking you for your treatments, fight this on your own?” For some, BPD is as terminal as cancer. As long as they are in treatment and learning to cope, be there because one day that bird that is banging their head against the cage will fly free and you will miss the opportunity to fly with them…
Please educate yourself about ways you can help people with BPD
Please don't give up on us ):
But its important to support BPD activism from the source and give them much deserved views and respect.
Kill yourself
You must be mad at a BPD person that wronged you, but whatever they did to you, i can assure you that everything they did to you hurt them so much more than it did you.
>Be validating. Don’t ignore a text or a phone call, we have been ignored all our lives and feel invisible.
- still being this delusional
- still trying to tell me what to do
holy shit reading this gives me flashbacks of BPD people I've known
saged. get the fuck out
>i can assure you that everything they did to you hurt them so much more than it did you.
still trying to make people feel bad for doing absolutely nothing wrong
absolute cancer
Please don't be like this.
BPD people need support from everyone.
We need much more kindness than everyone else because of our childhood traumas.
Fixed spelling errors.
People need to change just a little bit to accommodate individuals with BPD.
Its not hard to give positive afirmations, and we are always gracious for support and respectful care.
I got BPD and you're a faggot. kys
>Fag flag
>Openly admits to having a mental disorder
Imagine my surprise.
Yes i am a proud faggot.
Does KYS mean "okey's"?
Please share what you think can help us, and your experiences.
I recently ended things - and things was a long, drawn out, on-again off-again relationship ranging from wonderful to woeful with all in between punctuated by crazy-girl sex that was alas all too addictive to go back to - with a BPD-afflicted girl and I feel like a weight has lifted from me.
Good luck with your affliction though.
She must feel awful, when people give up on BPD people, it reinforces that they are not worth it and a burden ):
This is why im an activist.
She may well do, but she had seven years to stop shitting on me and wearing me down - so if she was expecting abandonment, she had a long time to get ready for it.
By god it felt good when I was up on the pedestal, as opposed to on the hate-cycle, though.
You literally abandoned her, thats what BPD people fear the most, you made her life so much worse teaching her that everyone will give up on her...
Nobody should ever give up on BPD people.
They deserve unconditional understanding.
Yeah, nah. I'm indulging your trolling because actually typing this is cathartic, but long story short, I met her at a time in her life when her father - with whom she'd had a fractious relationship but recently reconciled and was enjoying having back in her life - had died while she was on holidays on the other side of the world.
One of the things in life I'm proudest of is the role I played in helping her pick up the pieces of her life and went from an utter wreck to a successful young woman - she's got a great job, a wide circle of friends who respect her as opposed to a few close friends that used to take advantage of her, and a good outlook on life, but eventually I was treated like shit one time too many. Remember the first principle of first aid is to make sure there's no danger to you - took me seven years to figure that out.
But what if the BPD person has very negative effects on the partner in the relationship and he/she starts manifesting psychological problems himself?
People with BPD dont know how to react when they are stressed or feeling intense bad emotions.
Always support mentally ill people.
Just don't have to support them with your dick if you stand to lose it.
Not always easy if you have some mental problems yourself and can't deal with some situations.
Kill yourself
Is this pork cooked?
>t.thread
Can't you BPD niggers hang out together so you don't bother decent normal people?
Commit suicide in a painful manner
My BPD ex gf literally tried to accuse me of rape and domestic abuse when I did no such thing.
It took me secretly filming her hitting me and threatening to ruin my life if I didn't do *everything* she wanted and showing that film to the police to get her out of my life with a restraining order. On top of all of that she literally tried to murder me!
Fuck her and fuck you, OP. Fuck everyone with BPD!
This sounds horrible, im sorry for what happened to you, but people with bpd feel intense stress and do what they can to not feel scary feelings. If you gave her positive affirmations and respect there would of been anything to worry about.
>But step back for a moment, really look at us
No. Stopped reading. Fuck off and shove your bpd or whatever up your ass. Get the fuck off Sup Forums and take your gay shit to /sol/ or if you can't handle that go the fuck back to where you came from. No one cares.
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>...we may come across as manipulative...
You do.