I'm applying to a job and they're going to ask me this question under a polygraph machine...

I'm applying to a job and they're going to ask me this question under a polygraph machine. Does going on Sup Forums constitute being part of a group of persons seeking to subvert the US government? I mean, we have done some Jewish-y things to achieve our ends.

>Are you a member of any foreign or domestic organization, association, movement, group, or combination of persons which is totalitarian, fascist, communist, or subversive, or which has adopted, or shows a policy of advocating or approving the commission of acts of force or violence to deny other persons their rights under the Constitution of the United States, or which seeks to alter the form of Government of the U.S. by unconstitutional means?

Am I fucked?

No. Pol isn't a group, it's a web site. It doesn't have leaders or membership or a program of activities. Also, polygraphs are 90% for show. They tell you how it works (leaving out the evidence against it) and do a fake demo where they claim they can guess a number you thought of. At the end of the test they tell you you failed, then use well-known interrogation techniques to elicit a confession. It's the same stuff you see in any "don't talk to the police" YouTube video. The polygraph examiner can't fail you, only the QA people at headquarters can fail you. If they say you fail, you will get another shot at it, as long as you didn't admit anything in the post test questioning.

But if you think you're going to freak out about it, tell them you post on a web site where people of lots of different political persuasions discuss things, and you don't know what anyone in particular really believes or what they do about it.

Is this like a government job, otherwise why the fuck

>are you a member of any foreign or domestic organization

Do you have a Sup Forums pass?

And if you're going for a SSBI with poly you are a fucking idiot to even come here in the first place. Although the feds are desperate enough for contractors who can push buttons and play sysadmin, so you might get in. But fuck user. . .

the way to "beat" a polygraph test is to make the results look invalid. like when they ask if your name is John Smith, think really hard about your name actually being Ty'Wroan Sizzurp.

Lmao

Polygraph machines are a meme. Don't sweat it, the test will only become relevant as an excuse to disqualify you.

This was my thought. I'm not a "member," I'm just a user.

No... Sup Forums is an institution that fights for western values against subversive elements that wish to bring our civilization, and America, down to a level of chaotic barbarism and brutishness that would allow them to seize power.

You are a patriot using your leisure time to defend the American people and their way of life from foreign and domestic enemies.

We're fucking heroes, senpai.

The fact that this question concerns you is what will lead to you failing. As long as the question perturbs you, you are at risk of failing.

If this is to get a Secret or Top Secret clearance with a private contractor that handles government materials or data, yes the polygraph is legitimate and required.

I had to take one to be a Pinkerton on a General Motors site that had proving grounds used by the military. The closest I ever came to classified material was an Abrams outfitted with an experimental gyro-stabilized laser anti-missile system.

polygraph machines are only 60% accurate. you can dispute any test and legally win.

Are you a member of

>A. any foreign or domestic organization
Not me, I hate organizations

>B. association
Same as above

>C. movement, group or combination of persons
I am not a member of any of this

>D. which is totalitarian, fascist, communist, or subversive
Does petting my cat count?

>E. or which has adopted, or shows a policy of adovcating or approving the commission of act of force or violence to deny other persons their rights under the US constitution
I am not a member of the Democratic party, which tries to take the rights away from people, no.

>F. or which seeks to altr the form of Government of the US by unconstitutional means
See above, I am not a member of the Democratic Party.

well are you?

youve never subverted. youve shitposted and fapped. fear is the mindkiller, youll do fine.

Polygraph tests are a bluff.

They work by making you THINK they can tell if you're lying.

At best, they can tell if you're worried.

THIS
Sup Forums is PRO AMERICAN, PRO CONSTITUTION
ANTI KIKE ANTI CRIME

Don't lie to the U.S. government. Tell them the truth, but also inform them that you were just committing sedition ironically.

Kek

lol

Which chat board would that not cover to the same extent it covers Sup Forums Sup Forums? Maybe comments on the Food Network, that's about it. You're OK.