If my goal is to meet virgin or at least relatively not-whorish women? Or does it vary church to church? Also, what is the Sup Forums approved version of the bible?
What Christian denomination should I join?
Bentley Evans
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Ryan Jackson
Episcopalian
Isaiah Myers
the one with Charismatic Speaking in tongues, plus Snakes
Camden Reed
The Orthodox Church. It isn't a denomination at all.
Leo Foster
>Sup Forums approved version of the bible
KJV
Ethan Nelson
If you don't truly believe in it, don't join any.
Wyatt Martin
Colton Flores
...
Cameron Reed
This.
Jeremiah Lee
Christian identity maybe don't fall for the eastern orthodox shit though.
Hunter Edwards
...
Jacob Bailey
...
Carson Taylor
There is one Episcopalian church by me but they fly a rainbow flag and it's in a lefty neighborhood, I assumed it was filled with trash.
I'm a christian, I just don't attend church. The incentive to actually go to church for me is to meet quality women
Lucas Wright
Adding onto this... there is another smaller Episcopalian church that's in the richest neighborhood in the city, guessing that's the one I should go to?
Anthony Harris
What makes you want to go to an Episcopalian church?
Kevin Ward
Just responding to the people who suggested it. I was raised Lutheran, but I don't really have a preference, don't know much about the various denominations.
Sebastian Baker
Eastern Orthodoxy. Go to one service, and you'll know what I mean.
William Smith
Serbian Orthodox faggot, you'll find a cute waifu that will cook and clean for you
Carson Smith
Great thread OP, I've been wondering about this recently myself.
William Wilson
Read the New Testament first, then start studying various denominations. Lutheranism isn't bad at all 2bh
Cooper Bailey
Whatever you do, do it for community and not because you believe in ghosts.
Logan Moore
their architecture looks like dragon dildos
Parker Hughes
Eastern Orthodox is the closest you can get to the original early Christianity from Roman times.
Wyatt Lewis
Calvinism
Use John MacArthur's sermons as a guide (although I dont agree with him on every issue, hes one of the few Ive talked to who comes off sincere in his knowledge
Do not be bewitched by the other evangelicals, the RCC, or the mainliners into thinking that Christ's death was not enough.
Ethan Russell
KEK Good one.
Justin Lewis
Baptist is bestist. but even some of them are compromised. ya gotta be tough on doctrine.
Jacob Jenkins
church of your body, get woke on jesus m8
David Nguyen
also, to deceive a believer such as a woman/trad girl you are looking to snatch is absolutely disgusting. If you are seriously only in it for vagina and cannot come to terms with the truth of Christ you have no business entering the church and leading a woman out of grace, who, in rarity, follows God's word and is part of His elected. You are doing the work of Satan and should fix yourself before attempting to pollute the minds of others
Nathaniel Wright
I'm a christian, and as far as I'm concerned meeting a woman with the intent of starting a large family of white Christians is doing god's work
Evan Wright
>Implying thirsty guys aren't a dead giveaway.
Bro, I've seen them trickle in before. They stop showing after a few weeks because they give up after being ignored and rather go back to jerking off to sissy porn instead of not being degenerate.
John Cox
Thanks leaf bro
Eli Miller
>I grew up Mormon
They act very traditional. The girls act like women, and it's expected they find a good man and start a family asap. They even have groups in church specifically designed to help couples meet. They're all about community. Try going to a mormon church sometime, form your own opinion. Also we have our own state.
>Best version of the Bible
New King James version if you want the closest thing to the most original documents we have.
Ian Reyes
If she is spiritually stronger than you with her relationship with God then you will not be doing His work user.
Men are to have moral and spiritual mastery compared to women. Its why women should not be allowed any position of leadership in the ministry. A flock is only as safe as to the ability of its shephard to care and defend it.
Find truth and you will find your woman. Do not prioritize the latter over the former. How can you lead if you are spiritually weaker than your partner?
Xavier Watson
You want conservative denominations. So Latin Mass Catholics, Eastern Orthodox, LCMS/WELS, ACNA, independent Baptists, and so on. Don't waste your time on the turbo liberal denominations. Moderate denominations will vary wildly. Also I recommend googling all of the churches in your area and examining their websites, facebook pages, youtube channels, and whatever else they may have. Lets you figure out which churches to immediately cut off your list.
Thomas Rodriguez
This user knows.
Nicholas Green
Bump
Dylan Butler
Also there are only 2 kinds of Mormon kids. Those who are good Christians and those who have problems with the church and get deeply into drugs, sex, fighting, the works. You can guess which one I was. I don't necessarily believe in God, but I see the benefits of the church now that I'm older. If you want ancient tradition, go Catholicism or Eastern Orthodoxy. If you want a conservative church focused on community, with a large organized base, the Mormons are the only ones I've seen. The others are too broken up, and disconnected with one another. Correct me if I'm wrong.
Camden Wilson
King James, don't go to church to creep on women either
Owen Brooks
Anything outside of Catholicism and Eastern Orthodoxy is just LARPing
Colton Bailey
Gay flag is red flag. Don't go.
In terms of actual community unfortunately that can vary from church to church regardless of denomination. The Mormons do have a very impressive community but I think the coziest one I've experienced was with the Orthodox churches. The Lutherans seem like fun guys though. The local ones here flat out discusses the Bible over a couple beers once a week just for fun.
Logan Collins
Pretty much what you're looking for is a theologically conservative church, which is usually also politically conservative.
In terms of specific denominations I don't personally have much of a dog in the fight because I'm currently undecided on most issues other than the basic ones but I can explain which are conservative and which are progressive.
>Evangelical
This is a pretty broad banner which most protestants in America are probably going to fall under. Essentially what it means is Baptist and things that are similar to Baptist. The church services have the lowest level of liturgy, that is order/structure/ceremony, and the music is usually modern. For people that are new to Christianity understanding which are evangelical can be a bit confusing because they will often have a name that doesn't tell you their affiliation like "Grace" "Faith" "New Hope." However it's mostly only Evangelical churches that have those sorts of names so you can usually assume that is what they, if they were different they would have the denomination name in their title or Saint. The vast majority of Evangelical churches should be conservative unless if it is a black church. With that said some progressive evangelical churches do exist and you will mostly just figure that out from experience or knowing how to read the code words on their website. If they talk about being "bible believing" or "faithful to the word of God" they are probably conservative. Also the vast majority of the time 'non-denominational' just means evangelical.
>Presbyterian
Presbyterian Church in America (PCA) is the conservative denomination. Presbyterian Church (USA) is progressive. Any I don't really know about Presbyterian other Presbyterian churches but those are the main two. They are essentially a middle ground in terms of liturgy, more structured and traditional than Evangelicals but less so than Catholics/Anglicans.
cont.
Jaxon Cook
>Lutheran
Lutheran Church–Missouri Synod (LCMS) and Wisconsin Evangelical Lutheran Synod (WELS) are both conservative but WELS is the most conservative. The Evangelical Lutheran Church in America (ELCA) is super progressive, they call God a women sometimes. Traditionally Lutherans would have had liturgy similar to Catholism or Anglicans however from what I understand a lot of them now are pretty much just Evangelicals that like to LARP as Lutherans however my knowledge on the topic is limited.
>Methodist
The United Methodist Church is the only big Methodist church in the USA and it has both a progressive and conservative wing so you kind of just have to take your chances with it or again the website of the church might let you know. In terms of liturgy they are in between Evangelicals and Presbyterian.
>Anglican/Episcopalian
The Episcopalian church is extremely progressive, probably the most progressive church in the US. The much smaller Anglican Church in North America is the main conservative alternative but there are some other small breakaways too. Liturgy, at least amount high church Anglicans, is equal to Catholics and Lutherans.
Most of the other smaller things like Church of Christ (UCC is liberal), Seventh-day Adventist Church, ect are conservative.
Catholicism and Orthodox Christianity is a lot harder to figure out. On paper at least they should all be theologically conservative however there are some priests in those churches who very clearly would like to be progressive if it wouldn't get them kicked out. Trial and error would really be your main option. And many (but definitely not all) are very politically liberal even if they are theologically conservative.
Gavin Brooks
Also as for bibles I'd recommend the ESV
Joseph Smith
Read:
Ayden Edwards
Church of Christ normally is pretty conservative unless it's UCC.
SDA I think is mostly conservative but with some liberal leaning churches.
Pentecostals vary. Most lean conservative but there are liberal Pentecostals. Most are extremely interested in coming off as modern though which can be a turn off.
Mormons are conservative but a bit on the cucked side, especially in recent years. Don't even consider attempting to join something like the FLDS unless you're a woman. There's also the RLDS and Community of Christ. CoC is pretty liberal but the ones that broke off to stick with the traditional RLDS ways are cool.
Jehovah Witness are hyper traditional to their belief system but they're also apolitical and have a lot of strange rules.
Michael Martinez
>Goes to look for EO and none are closer then an hour
Michael Peterson
Eastern Orthodox are spreading pretty quickly in America. I'm noticing they're becoming more common even in the most average suburbs and backwater towns.
Lucas Murphy
checked and based biblepost
Jeremiah Cooper
just look locally
Landon Fisher
Episcopal and Anglican parishes are absolutely saturated with leftist political agenda.
David Howard
Go ACNA if you want the Anglican experience. They have a few liberal parishes but not many. It's where the majority of the conservative and moderate Anglicans went with the conservatives the strongest arm of the denomination.
Chase Robinson
Just as many whores call themselves Christian. Knew a "good Catholic girl" who fucked on Friday, double teams, gangbangs, you name it. Stayed in on Saturday so she could get up for church every Sunday.
Carter Powell
It's pretty easy to figure out which ones are the conservative devout type and which are the sluts who play Jesus on Sunday once you become an active member of a church.
Adrian Phillips
100% this. Are there sluts that go to church? Yes, but church is still by far the best place to find the least promiscuous women.
Charles Barnes
>suffocating incense
>liturgy in a language you don't understand
>no gospel reading or any sort of cogent homily
>feel like an outsider if you aren't a 1st generation Romanian immigrant
You'd feel more at home at an Orthodox synagogue than an Orthodox Christian Church
Ian Campbell
TPBP
Liam Rogers
There's full English services, mostly in OCA and Antiochian Orthodox. There's also plenty of Orthodox churches cropping up, some mostly made up of converts. I never went to a Romanian Orthodox service but the Greeks were a friendly bunch.
Logan Adams
Jehovah's Witnesses
Our regular website.
>jw.org
It is full of articles, digital books, and a search engine for all Bible related questions.
We also have an entire encyclopedia archive.
That is for advanced Bible students and researchers that want to study certain subjects. For example you can type in Armageddon, Great Tribulation, Soul, Hell, and all references come up
teaching in detail where those are in the Bible and what they mean.
Our channel dedicated to shows of encouragement and lessons for kids all based on the Bible. Here's a good one to show to your kids so they don't try to push the trans garbage at them.
youtube.com
Request a free Bible Study
jw.org
Find a meeting near you
AMA!
Dominic Wright
The ACNA parish near me is literally Nigerian, so I don't know how I'd fit in. I should check it out though. I had a falling out with the Episcopal church (not for theological reasons, but for political reasons) and have been attending Roman Catholic Mass lately.
Leo Cox
Jehovah's Witnesses are heretics who deny the trinity. They are not christians in any real sense.
Ryan Bailey
Try Disciples of Christ
Pretty nice group
When I need to tell people I'm a Christian that's what I say. It's a big step up from a Unitarian
William Taylor
We're talking about Christian denominations, user
If you don't believe that Jesus was the incarnated second person of the triune God then you don't belong in this thread
Jackson Rogers
Try out the KJV, but ignore the KJV snobs. Its a great translation but it can be difficult to understand. Lately I've been using the NRSV for study and the ESV for day-to-day reading.
William Bell
The one I attended was all white except for one older black woman. I imagine it varies from area to area. I haven't tried the one that's much closer to where I live now yet. I liked the service more than I did the Episcopal one though. The Episcopals I met while nice felt more like a social club than an actual church. That they were just going through the motions of the service so they can hurry up and talk around the coffee machine.
Chase Smith
Hahahaha you are fucking crazy
Eli James
You'd have trouble finding one and a harder time convincing them to trust you. Snake handlers are a rather paranoid bunch since their religion is technically illegal in every state but West Virginia.
Ryder Powell
>dont share ownership of church of the holy sepulcher
>christian
Any will do user, but try orthodoxy
Luke Cox
When I was in university (San Jose, CA), I went and checked out a pretty large Episcopal church right in the heart of downtown (Trinity Cathedral). Man it was awkward. The place could have easily seated about 300 people, but I was one of maybe 15 that showed up for the Rite II service. The choir actually sounded fantastic and the worship was good, but the sermon was just atrocious. The guy got up there, bitched about some trivial drama between two members of the parish, and then cracked a joke about how funny some English bishop's license place was. I'm a baptized Christian so I participated in Communion, but the whole process just felt routine like they just wanted to get on with their day. I understand there are a lot of interpretations of the Eucharist, but if you subscribe to transubstantiation, you do NOT treat the Eucharist as a trivial routine. It was a strange experience.Maybe I caught them on an off day, I'll check them out again.
Matthew Nguyen
LCMS. I hate how other "Lutheran" churches make a mockery out of Christianity.
Brandon Sanchez
Sorry, I choose to follow the Bible. The Bible says that Jesus prayed to his God, not to himself. The Bible teaches that Jesus is the firstborn of all creation, the beginning of creation by God. It teaches that Jesus is a small god like angels and demons. Everything Jesus after his resurrection was GIVEN TO HIM by God himself. It teaches that after Armageddon and the earth has been cleansed, King Jesus will HAND OVER THE KINGDOM TO GOD AND WILL SUBMIT HIMSELF TO GOD AS WELL.
The Trinity is a Helenistic philosophical idea and pagan belief. Not a Biblical teaching. We know this because of the definitions used to describe it: Essence, substance, nature, homoousios, and persons is all Greek metaphysical terms origining in Helenistic Philosophy going back to Plato and Aristotle. The word hypostatic union comes from hypostasis. It is a philosophical idea from Helenistic Greek Philosophy. The Trinity can only be supported with pagan doctrine. These terms and beliefs are not found in the Bible but in Plato, Aristotle, and Pythagoras. The Trinity can be traced back through old triad gods, Greek Philosophy, and Hindu avatarism.
Luke Taylor
always figured the Sup Forums version of the bible was the KYS version
Tyler Morgan
Turkish Orthodox
Easton Stewart
My ACNA parish is associated with the Nigerians, but we're a former white Episcopal congregation. We have a couple of Nigerian families, but it's overwhelmingly white American.
We're very conservative and traditional with politics and theology.
Connor Cook
>im smarter than 99.9% of all people that have ever claimed to be christians and the TRUE christianity definitely came out of a small movement in 1800s America.
Kayden Young
I think Anglicanism is a beautiful faith but it's definitely right now not what men like Robert E. Lee was experiencing in a lot of places. I hope that changes though. I like to think the ACNA will give the Episcopal Church a swift kick in the ass and they'll rethink everything but who knows.
What did WELS do wrong? I get any hatred for ELCA though.
Logan Adams
Makes sense. I was watching some thing today about how the deity Odin was apparently described as being part of a metaphysical trinity; and of course the Hindu triune deity/ies are quite commonly known.
Samuel Long
Any that teaches a true gospel.
>faith alone in christ alone
>non-lordship salvation
>once saved always saved
Benjamin Wright
>thinks they are the purest form of Christianity
>mispronounces the Tetragrammaton
The eternal Jehovah's Witness
Eli Ortiz
Both debunked heretic conspiracy youtube.com
Dylan Johnson
Eastern Orthodox, or just check them all out.
Ryder Young
Recently started going to church with a girl I date.
We both grew up Roman Catholic.
You should check out a book called "Mingling of Souls" it addresses a lot of the things you're asking.
He also talks about how you shouldn't be a faggot and just LARP being christian to pick up good girls.
He specifically addresses this in the book about a guy who was a POS degenerate who went out everynight trying to pick up bar rats and then went to church on Sunday to find marriage material. Quality women see right through that shit, that's why they aren't trash.
Carter Lee
Here are some sound people for you
Ashfin Yagtin
Cherubim Church on YouTube
Ralph Yankee Arnold
Steven Anderson
jesus-is-savior.com
Also for conspiratorial Christian podcasts check out
Http://www.Canarycryradio.com
Http://www.youtube.com/facelikethesun
And revelation radio network
revelationsradionetwork.com
Gabriel Scott
join me
join the Unitarian Universalists.
Adrian Sullivan
You're an idiot.. he is correct.
The trinity and most of the shit he's talking about was made up by the Roman Catholic Church which wouldn't even let monks read the actual bible.
It was about control and it was exactly why Martin Luther nailed his theses to the church door starting the Protestant sect of Christianity.
Ayden Roberts
Does the Watchtower know you're posting on Sup Forums?
Parker Reed
Heretics watch this now.
Anthony Flores
Martin Luther, along with all protestants, was fervently pro-trinity. He specifically included the trinity in his catechisms for the Lutheran church.
Julian Rivera
Personal story: I'm catholic, somewhat traditional, but started going to the Latin mass in significant part to meet marriageable girls.
Short answer- getting married to a virgin significantly younger than me, who has a firm faith, wants lots of children, will be able to homeschool them (keep them out of the hands of my local leftist indoctrination centre), very cute.
Plus, Catholicism happens to be true. It goes all the way back to the Christ and the Apostles (like Orthodoxy) but actually has a coherent theology and understands that to be one universal church you need a central authority.
Caleb Wood
Mason Thompson
Did he ask her for tree fiddy?
Joshua Baker
Church is for faggots.
Xavier Perez
I actually just answered this guys's challenge in 00:45 with two pictures(this post and the previous) and the definitions of the Trinity itself: Essence, substance, nature, homoousios, persons, hypostatic union. Plato, Aristotle, and Pythagoras all taught these centuries before Jesus was born. Just trace "hypostatic union" on Wikipedia. It goes straight back to Plato, Aristotle and Neoplatonism.
Think about this: If I started using word like "Means of Labor," "bourgeoisie," "proletariat," "Base and superstructure" and called myself a Libertarian you'd all cry foul and accuse me of being a Marxist and Communist. Why? Because all my terminology used to describe "Libertarian" ideology is all Marxist in nature. You would all call me a fraud.
Why not with the Trinty? That's where the entire definition of the Trinity comes from. None of the terminologies, defintions, and understanding of the Trinity comes from the Bible. It all comes from Greek Philosophy, Stoicism, Hindus, and Pagans.
Jordan Kelly
Fidget spinner
Hunter Turner
...
Ryan Young
>Argumentum ad populum
really?
>mispronounces Jesus name and believes Jesus is God
Really?
Logan Rodriguez
...
Bentley Gomez
>Steven Anderson
Steven Anderson on race-mixing
youtube.com
"Interracial Marriage" Baptist Preaching (independent, fundamental, KJV sermon)
youtube.com
"Races" are a Fraud
youtube.com
Ryan Baker
fucking kek
David Harris
How about "Merely Christianity"?
Dylan Myers
Humans are incapable of comprehending the word of God and anyone who tells you otherwise is under the devil's influence and trying to lead you astray.