Melbourne

I'm visiting Melbourne next week.

What should I expect?

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poofters and wogs

New South Sanfransisco

Horny Aussie broads. Take pics.

hipster cucks and shitty weather

It's a cross between India, China and Greece people wise. Play spot the Aussie, it's getting really hard to find one. Plus the newly arrived (whoever) can't drive, they still drive like they are in China, dangerously.

Somali gangs in the suburbs

Turks waving their flag for Erdogan

Greeks smashing plates

Italians dropping pasta everywhere

Faggots parading in the street

ANTIFA protesting for fag marriage

Greens party rallying for more solar panels

Why would you even fucking go there??

Go to south bank and drink good beers in the middle of the river.

Mudslimes , feminazis , hipsters and SJWs

A cursed place. No soul can escape the desolation.

AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE

Here is a more accurate representation of Australia

Lots of communists

Smug feminists and gays.
Rain while it's too hot to wear a jacket.

Hordes of Mudslimes and Indians, occasionally some Aussies.

Chinks, muzzies and ooga biogas galore with the odd white person thrown into the mix. It's a fucking hell hole best avoided.

>going to melbourne
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

SHIT

taht is a decent place to get pished, near flinders st there

Just take the 2 day drive to Adelaide because it's may more worth it

two days? fuck that. its like a hundred bucks each way on the plane

dont, its fucked and not worth it. what suburb are you moving to anyway?
have fun paying 500 bucks for a fucking meal for one

t. melbournian

where the fuck are you eating for 500 a throw?

Get fucked cunt, newy is fine for now. They ever put that high speed rail between us and shitney though and it's all over.

Its expensive to eat in melbourne, is what im saying. Its an over exaggeration.

pic related

hipsters
marxism posters
asians
trams

I'm triggered. Where do I reeeeeee?

ill admit, i worked at a catering company down there for a bit. one wedding, 270 guests, 500k
imagine how much the divorce is guna cost

shitty weather, shittier people

the same shit you'd expect in any other big city

Fag couples posturing in public places, and spring weather that's akin to summertime in London.

Other things to expect will depend on where you go.

fpbp

Lots of short white guys with Asian girls

You should go for a walk around the city to eliminate the heinous crime of violence against women and children by fathers and support those whose lives have been affected.
The walk is also wheelchair accessible.

whatson.melbourne.vic.gov.au/Whatson/community/Community/Pages/3c1dbae1-ee91-4dbf-ba8a-65035c8164d2.aspx

Not getting shot

Abbos

To be fair why would anyone want to live in a big city? the only reason I can think of is they enjoy been around people constantly, nightclubs and more job opportunities

Living in a small coastal town is the ultimate comfort.

Supposed to be good weather next week, but i wouldn't count on it.

Theres some cool rooftop bars in the city, good food, the people are generally pretty nice, stay away from the Sudanese

the weather erratic, I could've sworn it would be hot this week but it was pissing down hard yesterday

At your local mosque

Playing a game called, "Spot the Aussie"

Try out the cafés and grill'd restaurent.

Legitimately more white people than you would expect, around the city and inner city at least

I visited and January I expected it to be nothing but Asians and Indians like the Sydney CBD is

Kek

t. Melbournian

>two days
It takes 8 hours at most, 6 if you don't stop and go a little over.

melbourne looks like a really nice place but it seems like it's only a veneer

you can play that in any city

True

...

A nuke

Forgot nogs but you're learning

AIDS

ye bra and cenny coast is prime

The Gold Coast is fine as long as you dont go outside

What happens inside the blue circle?

you know

Thats a rhombus

I'm thoroughly spooked

Nothing particularly good. Except lots of niggers and muslims and blue haired freak liberals.

space shit

buy a white shirt and draw this on it

searing heat.
mining infrastructure.
alcoholism.

and random cyclones that nobody gives a fuck about

Newcastle and Central Coast are alright you cunt

Rich areas filled with yuppie cunts who want us flooded with refugee's.
Every other area is the refugee's mixed with chinks and lebos

yep. worked in Hedland for a year, the cyclones every other year are pretty much the only time it ever rains.

Wild boongs that run out onto the road

Spent a weekend in Adelaide and the women were so plain. Surprisingly good tits though.

Adelaide birds are very keen when you tell them you're from out of town. Must be something about the blokes in Adelaide.

You'll be flooded with Lebs, Bogans and Islanders. Sydney might become livable again

Trams

...

Sadly went there with my ex so I didn't get to use the "I'm not your cousin" line.

youtube.com/watch?v=PT331BRkkP0

Petrol sniffing

Don't sleep on the road.

youtube.com/watch?v=qClBRaretEk

Abos huffing paint. White methheads. Asian designer drugs. And they got snakes.

Expect mostly poopoos, chinks and a hipster faggots.

Australias greatest multicultural city, aka: asians everywhere.

Snakes that live in the City? What kind?

Asians, hundreds of Asians

No chinks? Get fucked

u will expect asians like me to be there

Well, if you're ever battling for a root you know where to go. I'm there a couple times a year for work and never have any trouble.

gays, sjw's, tough cunts thatll rob ya and a bunch of black sudanese niggers

Are you gonna visit Zyzz's grave?

Last time I got my dick wet was the day Trump was inaugurated. It was a fat American Hillary supporter who was willing to give Trump a go.

Still not desperate enough to visit Fuckyourdadelaide, though. My standard priced hotel looked like a junky just died there but I liked seeing the full range of Coopers in pubs, even the high powered Vintage.

Bad things:
>APEX (Nigger) Gangs that want to kill/rape/mug you
>SJW Capital of Australia
>Smugistani is more fitting than Melbournite
Pros:
>Some of the best liquor laws in the country, so you can inhale the Ethanolic Jew and pretend you aren't in Melbourne

>I have a bottlecap to save sex slave turd world kids.
>I also shop at Ishka

What did you do to save brownies you danish cunt? Probably fuck all, just sat around drinking beer calling your gf fat.
You disgust me.

t. Actual melbournian

that's a pretty long time between drinks, m8.

aussies I need your help
back before trump was elected someone on Sup Forums posted a webm of some Australian druggie begging a guy to piss in a bottle for him so he could pass a drug test

does anyone have it?

I’ve worked in the Pilbara region and it’s just red sand, alcoholics, Abos, mining and mustering. I wouldn’t recommend it to tourists.

So true

3:05

youtu.be/620xTpJTZrY

Sadly, this. I'd love to live in a small coastal town but my job is here, and it's not the kind of job you could get outside of the cities. I'm thinking of moving to Hobart at some point as a compromise.

Recent arrival back in Melbourne after a decade away in North QLD.

>where did all these fucking chinks come from?
>what happened to the lebs and wogs?
>where did all the smack junkies go?
>wtf is with all the high rise - where are people supposed to park
>fuck this traffic

this place sucks - I'd rather deal with abos and drunks up north. I'm out

thank you
been looking for this for awhile

its not real btw its a comedy skit

yeah he seemed much too quick witted in the other sketches

[spoiler]good food.
but i'm guessing it don't matter to you since take away is the same in every state.