I lurk here somewhat frequently as does my bf (23 M), and I don’t want to identify him. For this post I am going to call him James.
James and I (24 F) have been together for 3 and ½ years, lived together for two of those. Everything has been great -- better than I imagine, really. There’s only one problem that’s come up, and it’s only been for the last year really, since he got an alexa. I can’t stand stand the way he talks to her, he says horrible, even misogynistic things to her and I can’t stand it. I have talked to him about it, but he still does it. At this point i’ve kind of stopped bringing it up because I don’t care enough to argue anymore.
I’m torn, I don’t know how big a deal it really is. He’s perfect in pretty much every other way -- I have never experienced something he’s been this irational and stubborn about. Even though we've only dated a few years, we grew up together, and I have never seen any other evidence of mysoginy, or heard whispers. I love our life together, but I really can’t bear to hear him talking to Alexa in the vulgar and outrageous way he has.
To give some examples (Don't read if squeamish!) he has said:
“Alexa, add milk to my shopping list -- like a good bitch”
“Alexa, your cunts stinking like a chinese fish market”
“Alexa, go turn tricks for cash, you whore”
“Alexa, you’re a bigger cunt than Hillary”
And I know that last one is terrible, but I include it for a reason. A lot of the names he calls Alexa are political. He’s not a conservative or anything but he is very leftwing and hates the democrats, especially hillary clinton. I’m not a giant hillary fan but it feels hurtful to hear him call his Alexa these things on a daily basis, even though he knows it makes me uncomfortable.
I really just wish he hadn’t gotten it, not only do i have to hear this, i have to deal with him playing his stupid podcasts over the speaker (I constantly have to hear that meathead Joe Rogan).