How could a live action NGE movie not be complete shit?

How could a live action NGE movie not be complete shit?

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If they pulled a jaws and you never saw the robots or angels until kaworu, they just showed the after effects of each attack.

remove rei.

It needs to have an actual budget and no japanese actors

This would work. The only thing that couldn't work live is the Eva fights, mostly because of budget.
Real half-German Asuka and British Mari would be bonus points. Love-action usually does a better job of getting real halfers.

Have Micheal Bay direct.

This.

Needs to be made in hollywood. with actors that don't all look like the same fucking person.

but keep it as retarded as the original

Why no Japanese actors?

Ohh hell yeah! This user knows what's up.

Angels speaking in ebonics, shiiiet nigga.

No more pussy Shinji. He gonna fuck dem hoes today. Yess suh! 200% improvement.

Michal Bay isn't that insane. He's not particularly deep, but he's pretty successful so...

pic reated

Interesting idea user, but how would one be able to show shinji going berzerk mode?

It can't. There is no purpose to make it besides money and we already have the rebuilds for that. It would be a shitty money grab in every possible iteration.

He's successful all right, but he's still shit. He fucked up Transformers and TMNT in the eyes of any hardcore fan and you know the anime community, especially Evafags, aren't going to be for it.

Evafags aren't going to be for anything.
They hate everybody and everything. There's no pleasing them

How old would the characters have to be? Would they go for the 13/14 year old characters or bump up the ages to late teens.

Damn man that Rei is smug af

That would be tough because if they were older, than their social retardation would just make them look immature and stupid, but if they were 13/14 the nude scenes wouldn't go over well with american audiences

The characters in Eva aren't white like those ones, though. What's the problem?

All live action movies are shit

I've never seen any live action jap stuff, but aren't most of their actors terrible?

>terrible doesn't even fucking begin to describe it

film > anime

By not adapting NGE and making a spinoff instead. Set it after EoE even and folks will wank the live-action as an artistic decision to mark the change in the world and characters.

Turn it into a sex comedy

Give it to Refn.

It's themes and specifics are tied to the fact that it's an anime.

bump

>including Mari

We're trying to make it not suck, user. Your idea is good if you want mass deaths in the theatres, though.

I'm not even a reifag but that is the prettiest smile in all of anime

...

Who could pull off a live-action Asuka? Rei would be easy enough, there's no acting there. That's one problem. Gendo might be a bit tricky to cast too.

lol that was so silly.

They could get rid of Kaworu, because literally no one likes that fag, and make Asuka the secret angel. Change nothing else about her, until the very end she sheds her persona and says that is it Lillan that deserve to live.

Plus Asuka and Shinji can break the tension by finally getting a deathmatch to see who is better.

And you can get some ending where Shinji wishes for the "real Asuka" to return and they wash up on the beach and then you have a good reason for him to strangle her.

Obviously with this it would make Gendo white, and Shinji could at least be half if they keep Yui jap.

this fucking doujin

was so great. I'm only hype for 3.0+1.0 yo give us the next flood of Eva doujins

Shinji being an Elliot Rodger would actually make a lot of sense

Kaworu was the soul of adam tho...and it wouldn't make sense if asuka was actually adam cause adam is a male

Adam also wasn't a faggot but look at Kaworu

>and it wouldn't make sense if asuka was actually adam cause adam is a male
Tie it into CURRENT YEAR shit, watch as money comes flooding in

Then make her a tranny for all I care. It'll be progressive.

It's just a story user, if I make it up, it can come true. Make her Eve.

tru

I don't remember her smiling like that, when does that happen?

Pretty sure it has to be in one of the remakes, haven't seen that smile either

pretty sure it's the cover for a toothbrush commercial

Have a fight between asuka and rei so f/a/ggots can finally decide who best girl is.

bump

You'd have to make Kaji more of a character for sure. He'd be the way to spoonfeed the audience what human instrumentality is through his nosiness. Also, Kaji is the best.

I guess it depends on what parts you're trying to adapt. Mari would be a good inclusion if you're focusing more on the exciting parts of the story or the characyers overcoming weakness.

The parts that don't make me want to gouge my eyes out. Those are the parts that will be adapted. And we're not adapting any of the rebuilds anyway, because that'd be stupid.

The hardest part would be finding people small enough to match their actual heights. Gendo is 5'7"ish. The Children are all around 4'7". MIsato is 5'4".

Adam is just a placeholder name. It means "human" in Hebrew.

Back to the YouTube comments where you belong

Back to the land of squeaker and songs

They'd have to work this song in somehow.

youtube.com/watch?v=KJuexdl_c5s

>make it not suck
>includes mari
Mari should die off screen before the start of the movies.

Isn't Mikasa being the only Asian a plot point? How did the deal with that?

If they were older teens people would find the angstyness even more annoying, and if you just do away with the angst then you're not making EVA are you?

If it's not Dr. House, The guy that played the lawyer in The Night Of gave me some gendo vibes. He could channel Gendo's weird combination of relentless drive and pathetic-ness pretty well. Also, your asukafag ways blind you, Rei would be the trickiest casting, everyone can do overacting, Rei's subtlety would be what's hard specially for someone that age.

Fucking terrible, I rather have Kaworu and I hate the fucker.

>Obviously with this it would make Gendo white

No, hollywood likes to make characters black for no real reason, Morgan Freeman as Gendo.

they'd probably have this song playing on a radio in the background.

Why does nobody like Kaworu? I found him one of the most memorable parts of Evangelion.

Hes good in small doses. but the more screentime he gets the more obnoxious influence he becomes.

He's like Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Look at the DVD Box art and Kaworu is is featured most prominently. He's an elevated side character.

That's true. He's very ethereal and mysterious. You can't make an enduring character out of him.

>seriously discussing LAEM like a bunch of mewling faggots
The only good LA was Speed Racer. LA is one of the worst things to happen to a series.

Everyone knows that it's going to be shit, doesn't make it any less fun to discuss

They could even add the feet in a bucket bit to semi allude to his other role.

Except Spike was entertaining and didn't make you want to kill yourself every time he was on screen

But it isn't fun and it's not going to happen.

from your mouth to god's ears

He's a flaming homo who preys on insecure young boys.

And Gendo is a rock of heterosexuality who preys on his son and everyone around him. And Misato was willing to offer sex to a boy literally half her age as a reward for saving the world. And the other 14 year old who literally climbed in bed and started spooning him.

But homosexuals are degenerates

Misato did nothing wrong. Just cause society wants to enforce this idea that it's a bad thing for smoking hot women to have sex with teenagers, does not make it true.

film < anime

2D perfection has been historically sought by humanity for countless millennia.

Misato knew she was dying, she offered it knowing there was no future for her, she did it for mankind. And she even questions the morality of it right before her death.

Doesn't change the fact that the boy probably hasn't grown hair on his arms or legs yet. As for what said, she acknowledges that she really shouldn't have been propositioning a 14 year old, especially at 28. Knowing that what you did was wrong doesn't make it less wrong.

What she did wasn't wrong.

wasn't it more a pep talk then an actual offer.

But she didn't do it to prey on him. She did it to snap him out of his inaction by offering the only thing she could that would. She acknowledges that it normally it's the wrong thing to do, but wonders if given the circumstances it was the right thing to do so:
> Knowing that what you did was wrong doesn't make it less wrong.
She literally doesn't know where the morality of what she did stands.

Side point: don't you remember puberty? he's 14, he's grown stuff already.

>Here's this kid who looks up to me as a surrogate mother figure
>Better make a pass at him, he's not fucked in the head enough.

After a kiss with tongue?

>After a kiss with tongue?
theres nothing wrong with saving humanity by igniting the testosterone of a 14 year old boy.

Well by that logic you probably think he can't fuck Rei either.

After seeing the kiss and 2 seconds of pure disgust, this is exactly what came to mind But you still have to wonder if it was too much. It could have given him some much-needed confidence, or fucked him in the head even more. Given the circumstances, I think the latter would be more likely.

Not saying there is, but she must have known that dropping that on him wouldn't help his mental state.

Oedipus, how are you even here?

>the world is ending and his girlfriend just died and a few hosers just tried to shoot him in the head but if I try to do something nice for the boy I'm the one ruining his mental state.

Oedipus complex supposedly only develops at a later age than Shinji was when his mother died.

In the trolley dilemma you would let the five people die because at least you wouldn't be taking direct action in the death of one wouldn't you?

When you have no other options choosing the lesser of two evils is the moral thing to do rather than do nothing and let the greater evil happen.

not made by hollywood for a start

GET OUT

Would it develop around the time when he saw his mother's teenage clone completely naked?

When she gets the picture taken for becoming Miss NERV

I didn't say it wasn't already fucked up, only that adding more confusion wouldn't help.
>The house is already on fire
>Adding more gasoline won't hurt

No, that's way, way too late for it to begin. Supposedly. It's all theories, after all.

by having Anno himself star in the movie and commit suicide on set at the very last second of the movie

>implying a Misato kiss is a bad thing, ever

It's like adding water to a burning building.

While said burning building had tons of magnesium stored inside

>girlfriend
Fuck off shipper.

but it's a special kind of magnesium that is diluted by water

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Hey chemistry just doesn't work like that.

Asuka and Shinji are deffo in a relationship. that is just reality

Adapt it as a cornball tokusatsu where all of the Angels boast about how powerful they are, and warn the pilots about their even stronger sibling when they explode with at least 5 sudden replays.

You can't cram the story into movie format, just look at the rebuilds. Remaking masterpieces in general rarely ever works.