Aliens, hit me up!!

Any aliens reading this?? Actual aliens with political motives. Looking to take over this shit-ass planet? Itching to strip mine that one resource? Maybe you need some 'human finesse' for the job. I can do anything for you as a 100% biological human. I will betray everyone but in return I just want one small thing to happen, like a christmas gift. And I would like to survive and not be injured.

Ayy here.

I just like to shove stuff up humie buttholes.

I smoked some salvia the other night and turned into an alien. AMA

When can we expect some actioni?

Pretty soon I think. I’ll need to talk to my new found brothers again

nigga you lying

Hello aliens,

If you do indeed require human services I also would like to make this offer and request.

If there were aliens reading this, the fact that you conceive of it as betrayal might turn them off. What psychological model do you expose by that thinking? Do you think it indicates trustworthiness on your part?

Think more strategically user, and you will see.

Good point... let's say that I would not hesitate to undermine my friends or family to get my wish!

Dear Alienz.
I grew up watching V.
I can round up fodder and food source meat bags and run them into a FEMA camp for you.
All I ask in return is to be a sex slave for Pleiadian womenz.
And consider this my application for Dark Fleet.
NSA/CIA/FBI/S4/Solar Warden.

Why have Aliens, if they are so smart, never invented clothes? I am pretty tired of seeing naked aliens every picture.

...

years ago when it was legal i smoked some 20x and legit saw the fucking air and 3 hooded entities appeared over me and turned me into water and made me seep into the grain of the wood steps i was situated on. "MADNESS I SEE NOW" i screamed repeatedly.
37 years later when i came to my friends said i just laid on the steps and giggled

You're lucky we think it's funny that you think we look like little human cancer patients. Don't you humans have more imagination than this? We don't even remember what we used to look like since leaving our home world.

Our suits have become more or less inseparable from our bodies. Once you guys hit space, get ready to never be naked again.

Would I shit you? Your my favorite turd

Oh, you’re not lying. Shit can be undescribable

Ayyyy ese wanna ride in my low rider?

Can we smoke salvia?

Suits? Come on, vacuum isn't that harsh once you've re-engineered your flesh enough. Shapeshifter supremacy forever!
srslytho if your suits are inseperable they basically ARE part of your flesh

>I can do anything for you as a 100% biological human.
Your bargain is accepted. I require one warm human hole to practice this 'lovemaking' concept you are all so consumed with.

Don't worry about telling me who and where you are, I already know. I'll see you soon.

vacuum, particle and radiation bombardment

...

Ayyy here. I wish to inhale mass quantities of human farts.

Our suits act as sort of, you'd say, cybernetic aspects that act as zipper locks, valves and such for our flesh. Parts of our bodies can be removed and replaced. The suits act as a skin. We engineered organs that host microbial cultures which are able to produce and recycle gasses for respiration.

Hello beautiful

Ok, I'll wait patiently. Don't forget my wish though

What are relations with other ayy groups like?

oh and bump

GTFO SPACE NIGGERS
WE'RE FULL