Can a 3rd party ICE my gf?

she's really annoying, temperamental and childish and I'm tired of dealing with it desu

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Sure senpai

Why not just leave her? Why use my taxpaying dollars to fix somwlething you're too cowardly to confront?

Are you a sick cunt or a shit cunt?
You're in a position of absolute power right now and I don't think you can even appreciate it - Tell that brown slut to suck your dick to completion or you're going to deport her.

And remember; you DO deserve a blowjob before the jacuzzi.

>implying you are given hardworking ICE a job to do.
It's almost like you want illegals here.

ICE is for gangbangers not maids

ICE her parents and family OP then shed be pretty much your slave

kek

Does she have a husband?

dude drown yourself in the shower

is she Mexican?

>dude drown yourself in the shower
Thinks we shower.

>Sup Forums cuck
>has a gf
Sure thing bud

dude leaflanders dont shower we all know that they just rub snow on there balls to make there cocks even smaller

she's a pale skin russian. probably bipolar

We have to make them smaller to "fit in" with the culture down there.

her parents are in Russia and only annually visit on VISA. her brother works for the Russian government on some 'secret' military base and is ex/current russian mafia so i cant just break up with her and need her gone asap without my (((consent)))

yes. not me though

the culture of a mudslime fucking your wife for you

Sure I need her name and address

Ok well then tell that pale slav slut to suck your dick to completion or you'll deport her.
Why aren't you blowing your load in her mouth this very second?

And he's a really juicy tip: there's a good chance she'll actually enjoy the sadistic roleplay side of it and won't even resent you for taking advantage of her like this.

I will let you walk away from this unscathed (as it were) if you send me a 73 Falcon XB.

i need a serious fucking answer fucking faggots she's ruining my life and i am sick of her leeching. her entire family has my address for packages they used to send when she didnt have a job. and her attitude complemented by her childishness isn't worth the free laundy and dishwashing nor her shit, teething blowies

Get raped syrupnigger.

Slap her every time she uses teeth.

>i need a serious fucking answer fucking faggots
Do you know Jimmy? Well Jimmy got the AIDS but won't die and the women can't say no to him.

You seem like such an angry person to have come from such an easy going woman.

Dont pretend that you have dignity left you lost this shit post hard.
Now go fuck a tree Soyboi

she's the type that would just bite down after a slap. i can only get away with that when im fucking her with my off hand on her throat
how does that help me?

Never claimed to have any dignity. Tell me more about your anger. When did it start?

youtu.be/9Pwy-cAf09I
where leaflanders go when they die

No... no i think you may be holding something back. Everything you say here is just between us so holding back will just delay your healing.

kill her

This kills the leaf.

Hei der boodie. Stoop wid all uh yer shidposten ookay? Eenoof of all taht snubbry. If yoo wan we kin goo en pley soom ice hookey. wuddu yoo sey eh?

I'm sorry. I've never visited Quebec so I am not sure what you just said. Thanks for the effort tho!

yoo sey det yoo'd nevur vist'd Ka-Beck, boot huw doo yoo know huw a Ke-beckur would type eh? De snubbry a da wes cust hes nuu end. If we wur on bledes I'd shew yoo a gud one n drup te glooves.

Sounds like she doesn't have any boundaries set, women need boundaries mate.
She should know that if she ever did something like that you'd get serious and that's not something she should want.

A friend of mine's GF tried to fuck with his guitar once and he slapped her so hard she broke down and cried on the spot.
They need boundaries, they want you to be their loving but stern father.

Sounds like some pretty sweet connections, just keep her around and see what kind of crazy shit her family gets into

Best thread ever.

Every time she uses teeth, put it in her butt and blow it on her face.

>op getting drunk on bathtub vodka and climbing stuff 500ft tall in a sweat suit.

I'll take your qt russian gf, user.

Best post

I respect your religious beliefs however I can not speak in tongues so I must reveal the truth. Go to your dads closet and look for a dusty key on the top right shelf (way in the back). Now that you have the key go to the basement and move the washing machine.... look for a loose cinder block. Pull the block out and look for the keyhole in one of the openings of the block. Put the key in the keyhole, open the door and back while the security protocol scans the area (just in case). Now, reach in and pull them out... yes... yes that's them... Those are my underwear my child. P.S. Tell your mom she still owes me 60 bucks.

How much $$$

Im saving for one of these

Don't do it man. Thais so fat that you can pick 6 or 7 of them up for free driving home from town with the plow down.

Alas, the liquor kicked in :(

Yur bantz 'er week. Yoo need ta pik oop yur stick, broosh awf yur jursey, gethur oop yur teet, n hoop te rest ov dem dunt root uut bekooz yoo eat tuu much mooze en drink tu much syrup! Eim disappointed wid yuu. Tot de hed gud bantz.

I understood that!!! Welp, I'm ready for my passport neighbor!

>What is body fat percentage and muscle mass and what is literal fat shit

I dont think you go on fit very much to tel lthe difference between some fat piece of shit and this almost genetically impossible goddess. She must be able to squat 180+ with those legs. Fuck me. Also: virgin, shit and dick free asshole to eat all day long

Sorry I forgot to take my trip off from the doll thread on r9k

nuu. yuu've'n't yet tu pruve yurselv. huw kin we troost such a wily kreture sooch as de evur olusive leev? Huw wull yuu pruve yurselv troostwurdy?

I had to slap her once when she was punching me in the back of the head while I was gaming. She threw herself on the floor and stormed off making herself believe I started the whole thing. If I'd caved the next day and said sorry she would've believed she was in the right but I didn't and she knows she fucked up. So she's my glorified dishes and laundry slave now. She even thanks me after every fuck.
She's yours for $350

Cmon now.... really. That ass is 75 pounds of shaving cream sprayed into 2 10 pound bags. From above when she walks (if she could) it would look like 2 smart cars doing 360's under a parachute.

She was punching you in the back of the head because she wanted you to fuck her, hard.
This sounds like the perfect recipe for a submissive sex slave, like I said she probably wouldn't even resent you for it and the more you tell me about her the more I KNOW she'd actually like it.

Fuck her hard.

Actually its 110lbs of pristine TPE over a fully metal endoskeleton.

I would bury my face in that ass all day

I can bring my grandfathers map of Nottingham Forest. The secret one that shows where the camps with trees were. In case you doubt me, i have a picture of a piece of real tree bark.... that alone proves my worth.

a womans pussy is like a oyster.

Well man... you'll have to send it to me for testing... does it have finger nails?

Yeeeaaahhhh boooooiiii

dude just report her to ICE yourself. You can still pretend to act surprised when they kick the door in to grab her. Not only is it the right thing to do, but it also makes for a good story.

This is now a doll thread and I am the new OP

There is NO need for sex dolls if you know how to talk to women.

I hope you join the new master race and get a new dolly gf OP

check out the r9k thread for details

Yeah if thats your thing whatever. I want something silent and pliable and has a shit free asshole to eat.

Om nom nom nom

if you hate her that much lose contact and just bail.

Block her number
Block her family
Remove social media

Take your wallet and a few things and just bail job done problem solved.

Dont block her number until you take selfies with new dolly gf and send them to her to make her mad

And then you open your mail....

woke

wasn't this doll modeled after a pornstar?

...

Seriously dim mutt, leave the colonies to themselves. Youre just assing it up by interfering with your sub par pseudobantz.

Jesus dude, the situation sounds fucked.

You should try and contact her family and talk with them and her about how this isn't working and how she'd probably be better back in Russia. If a deal can't be struck report her to ICE.

Sounds like you got a case of, you're too much of a bitch to stand up for yourself.

So basically I find the prognosis to be ineffective , and you'll be a bitch till you get some self confidence. Something no one else can help you with...

Not as far as I know, at least I havent heard about it

Hate fucking and passionate fucking are great, bland fucking is meh.

I was looking for ice jackets and I found this comic

I was thinking about getting a t shirt or one of those jackets with snap buttons

L O N D O N
O
N
D
O
N

It was modeled after a pregnant Egyptian. Thank you for your customer service questions.

London, UK.

Got to specify mate.

>It was modeled after a pregnant Egyptian
Hol up!

I hate to disappoint you bud, but we dont return waifu pillows for you.

*inhales*

aahhhhh


bluuegh beleughgb lebugl belughgh belugghghh bleuehgh belugh belhgugh

motorboat the shit out of this shit

Thank you for your interest. Our Sheepah model comes pre loaded with Herpes AND Explosives. You never know what one will activate so it doubles your excitement!

Just conveniently drop the hair dryer in her bath tub.
Make sure she's still in there.
Then just call 911 and play freaked out/in shock and dodge any questions.
Just sob.. and look mad.

Honestly, I find the form really attractive but just a doll seems sad and pathetic to fuck. nothing more than an advanced flesh light. If it moved, had lubrication and was warm...maybe. I would pay 20-50k for a real walking talking robot waifu.

20-50k will get you a real 9/10 human waifu from Eastern Europe.
>Dumb burger.

>nothing more than an advanced flesh light.
hoooo eeeeee boy you just triggered my signature post. Here is the depraved shit Ive cooked up in my degenerate head so far on the r9k doll thread general when someone comapred it to an onahole

>You cannot nibble the earlobes of an onahole
>You cannot coy-fully gnaw on the creamy nipples of an onahole
>You cannot caress the imperfect tummy of an onahole
>You cannot playfully tongue the lewd bellybutton of an onahole
>You cannot clutch at and jiggle the disproportionately large hips of an onahole
>You cannot kiss the velvety arches and lick the silky soles of an onahole
>You cannot suck on the enchantingly alluring toes of an onahole
>You cannot slap the fat thighs of onahole
>You cannot cradle the fleshly mass of buttocks of an onahole
>You cannot bury your face in the meaty cheeks of an onahole
>You cannot eat the untouched virgin asshole of an onahole
>You cannot tit fuck the oversized supple breasts of an onahole
>You cannot blow your load into the sultry embrace of the voluptuous lips of an onahole
>You cannot position yourself under the supple arse and ease the entire weight of the doll down on your face with an onahole

You know you've genuinely improved my day right? Haven't had a giggle for awhile.

Oh please, for what a year or two until she figures out she can leave you and take everything?

Glad to have helped!

Ancaps everyone

The things I would do

If I listed all these things and was talking about a real woman, I would be called mild and not adventurous, yet with a doll its bad.

I will be suffocating under this slab of buns whether you like it or not.

FREEDOM

at the very least it still needs a warming action of some sort and movement. Maybe programmable audio.

Here's what you do, op. This Friday, be extra nice, and tell her you're taking her out on a surprise date - maybe get her flowers - really go all out. Blindfold her, and load her into your car and tell her you're taking her out to a surprise dinner. Drive to the nearest immigration office, and walk her into the door blindfolded.

dolly gf got onesie up bum bum

ooopsies

Can see that. Captains log Star date 2027.... My sex doll moved in with a Buick today. Buick galvanized their frames in 2022 so there is no end to the payments for little nut and bolt.

They sell stick warmers yo shove up her, the same way they do for fleshlights. I kind of prefer that idea because any internal electronics are prone to failure whereas she is more or less analogue now without any of that AI stuff thats coming.

oops forgot it

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